Too $hort – Get Off the Stage
Jive Records (12/4/07)
Rappers don’t age well.
This is simply not up for debate. Legends from the ’80s, such as Chuck D, KRS-One and Rakim, have turned into a liberal apologist in ill-fitting jeans, Nelly’s bitch and an anonymous old man, respectively. And these were the good ones.
Todd “Too $hort” Shaw has released more than a dozen albums during a prolific career that, in all seriousness, should serve as a testament for any young rapper who yearns to be heard. And, with the release of Too $hort’s latest album—the aptly titled Get Off the Stage—it can be safely said that we’ve heard enough.
No lie. No exaggeration. This is one of the worst albums ever made. It plays like a ridiculously bad parody of rap music’s worst elements. Too $hort’s career was never about lyricism, but he had enough charisma to make his tongue-in-cheek, dirty third-grade rhymes work on some level.
Whatever pleasure Todd Shaw once got from (and gave back to) the music industry has been replaced with a grotesque shell that spits about “wiping his ass on a bitch’s face” on the repulsive “Sh*ttin’ on ‘Em”. Not clear enough? $hort will spell it out on “F*ck You”… which he literally does for the hook.
Don’t worry, it’s safe to call this album repetitive. The first two tracks (“Get Off the Stage” and “Broke B*tch”) both take aim at groupies, male and female, and the subject is revisited on almost every other song for the rest of the way. Mix in several inane hyphy beats and a few guest spots from artists who are still aspiring to be “nobodies” (wait, is that really E-40?!) and the result is an album to avoid at all costs.
Rap music has been unfairly attacked for decades by people who don’t know the first thing about it. Too $hort, by himself, is doing more damage to it than any right-wing special interest censorship group ever could. The last track here is titled “It Ain’t Over”.
They say the artist is always the last to know.