It’s not just any PPV this month. It’s one of the big four. While Survivor Series isn’t officially the start of the “Road to Wrestlemania”, history has shown us that this is where the biggest event of them all starts to take shape. So keep you eyes open for potential Wrestlemania matchups and in the mean time, enjoy the picks of the best predictions team on the internet, the Inside Pulse writers.
WWE Championship:
Triple H (c) vs. Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jeff Hardy
Paul Beasley: Ah, a Triple Threat match. Haven’t had one of those for a while. Or maybe we have. I don’t care. So it’s the big-nosed King of Cerebral Games (you should see him do a Sudoku – it’s like lightning) against Mr “Me-am-big-Russian-funny-talk-head-butt-lalalala-Glasnost-I-can’t-hear-you” against the Extreme Rainbow Enigma Warrior. Look forward to Trips trying to lead the other two through a real Main Event while making them look as good as he can. And with Jeff’s whole silly-make-up extremeness push he’s been getting on Smackdown in recent weeks, I think they’re going to finally pull the trigger on Jeff Hardy – World Champion. The build-up to the match seemed to be more focused on Jeff even when he hadn’t been put IN the match. So it’s gonna happen. Oh, how the Champion’s promos are going to suck more than a prostitute vacuum cleaner. Never mind. It’s only Smackdown.
Winner: Jeff “Three Strikes and You’re Outta There” Hardy
Danny Cox: This is it. He may not pin Trips for it…but this is it!
Winner and NEW Champ – Chubbykins Hardy
Andrew Wheeler: A year ago the WWE title was being contested between Randy Orton and Shawn Michaels over on RAW and now it’s a triple threat between the established top superstar on Friday Night Smackdown, an upper-midcard guy who finally seems to have his shit together enough to make a legit run and a new monster heel who’s untested against anyone we would consider a serious challenger. This match is happening because Cyber Sunday is not only rigged but creatively stifling. Had we gotten the triple threat last month, I have no doubt that Kozlov would have won the gold and we would have set up the one-on-one rematch at Survivor Series where Hunter would kill him dead. Now? I’m not so sure what’s going to happen. All I know is that WWE Champion Triple H isn’t going to do anybody any favors anymore because he’s out of challengers. Here’s the scenarios that the WWE has with their outcomes: either Hunter wins and moves on to a feud with Big Show (yawn) or Kozlov wins and we get a new dynamic on Smackdown. Say Kozlov walks away with the title, that means Hunter would want a rematch. So would Jeff Hardy. The two of them would then pair off in some sort of feud while Kozlov could move on to face the Undertaker during the whole “Armageddon†timetable. This frees up Big Show to feud with the face Khali. Maybe? If not, then I guess Edge’s return would allow him to get plugged back into a boring feud with Triple H while Jeff Hardy in his new Joker rip-off attire squanders what could be the most interesting character development for him in years. Kozlov as a heel champion would be very “old school†considering he’s essentially the evil foreigner, but maybe a fresh guy at the top would shake up Smackdown a little. It’s sad to say, but there really isn’t a major move that Smackdown could do that would be a landmark change. While Kozlov would be different, he isn’t going to drive up ratings. Crazy Jeff Hardy could be a fun loose cannon character, but outside of continuing his feud with Hunter, where could he really go? And as for Hunter keeping the belt, that means he’s moving on to Big Show or Edge, and we’ve seen both of those before. Also, if Kozlov just up and loses, what was the point of building him as a monster to begin with? Same goes for the new Jeff Hardy. His gimmick was that he was “just that close†and now that he’s gone insane, the “just that close†gimmick is dead and gone, but losing would kill this new one as well. Lastly, having Hunter lose the belt in a match where he really isn’t involved in a feud would kind of seem anticlimactic (though it would be the perfect time to transition him down the card for a little bit). My guess is that Crazy Jeff Hardy does something crazy and wins the belt, allowing him to go feud with the Undertaker, while Hunter and Kozlov can pair off for one-on-one matches. I can’t believe I’m picking Jeff Hardy to win the title. Jeez.
Winner: Jeff Hardy. Seriously, I’m picking Jeff Hardy. I’m disgusted with myself.
Mark Allen: For some reason they are really holding off on that HHH-Vlad singles match. Apparently they think the fans will all of a sudden want to see it if they wait long enough. The Hs win here so they can beat Vlad in December and then maybe finally blow off the Jeff Hardy Title win at the Royal Rumble
Winner – Triple H
Raffi Shamir: The Jeff Hardy push reminds me of what happened to Samoa Joe in TNA. He had so many title shots and lost that it hurt his momentum when he finally did it. On that same note, if they don’t give Hardy the title now, they might as well release him because that’s as hot as any wrestler is going to get. I hate to admit it, because I’m anything but a Jeff Hardy fan, but WWE must give him the title on Survivor Series and I believe they know it.
Winner and new champ: Jeff Hardy
Paul Marshall: The better question is, are they just holding off the Trips v. Koslov encounter until they see how he does in the big match environment? I’ll say this though, after the extensive buildup for Hardy over the past few weeks…if Jeff Hardy loses, I riot.
Winner: Jeff Hardy
Iain Burnside: It ain’t happening. Sure, Jeff beat Taker and then the Hs and now he’s XTREEMZ or something but It still ain’t happening. His recent wins are just attempts by WWE to keep him looking strong following his defeat at Cyber Sunday, which was almost as big a mistake as Batista beating Jericho. Besides, Booking 101 says that he who looks strongest on the go-home show winds up jobbing at the PPV. Furthermore, this show is basically SuperCena Returns. If It was really going to happen then It would be the focal point of the PPV to maximise interest in the outcome. It may well still be on the cards for WrestleMania (or not at all, depending on what the hell is going on with WWE.com’s story about Jeff being taken to the hospital on the day of the show) but for now let us be content with an Edge run-in and two crazy guys beating the fuck out of one another in XTREEMIC@L ways at Armageddon.
Winner – THE H
World Heavyweight Championship:
Chris Jericho vs. John Cena
Paul Beasley: Alas, poor Jericho. We knew him, Horatio. A fellow of infinite talent and charisma. Unfortunately, his latest title-reign has smacked of “Holding Pattern for Cena” from the moment he regained the belt from Dave. They’re not going to have Cena return at one of the “Big 4” when it happens to be in Boston and then have him lose straight away. Captain Spinny is “spoiling for a fight” as they keep telling us, so the question is more about whether Jericho can carry him to something half-decent. I have my doubts. The dumbass build-up has featured no Cena promos whatsoever (which is something he’s actually passable at). Or maybe I’m wrong. Maybe there have been promos and we’ve all missed them. Maybe Cena’s been right all these years, and we really CAN’T see him. How I wish that were true.
Winner: John Cena
Danny Cox: Jericho just lost the title and won it back almost immediately. Cena returns, but has yet to make an appearance on WWE television. I’ll admit this makes it a bit hard to decide who the winner is because Jericho has had to feud with himself pretty much without any interaction at all. Then on the last RAW before this PPV; there was no last second beatdown or pinfall to help determine who may end up winning. Interesting, and I’m wondering if…no, no…it won’t happen! This feud will continue on with actual back-and-forth between both of them.
Winner and STILL Champ – Chris “Save Me” Jericho
Andrew Wheeler: Survivor Series sells itself on classic team versus team gimmick, so the WWE was already expecting it to pull a huge buyrate. Now that they’re adding the return of John Cena, expect this thing to go through the roof. With that said, there is no way Cena is winning the gold here. Sure, we’re pumped that he’s back, but why rush the gold onto his waist right off the bat? People are buying the show to see him return, not to see him win. Chris Jericho as the dastardly champion still has some mileage left in it, so why not let it run its course. My guess is that Cena’s return is going to spark the ire of Randy Orton, who will probably form his new posse at Survivor Series and cost John the gold. By having the top three contenders be Randy Orton, John Cena and Dave Batista, you have three of the most over superstars killing themselves to get a title shot. Hell, throw in Shawn Michaels, Kane and JBL and you’ve got an elimination chamber match for December. Who does that leave for Jericho? Why not give us a Rey Mysterio feud to tide us over? I know I don’t like Rey, but him working with Jericho would be pretty cool. As for this match? I’m sure John will be a little rusty but thankfully Jericho’s a pro who will ensure that Cena looks like a million bucks. In the end I think either Orton and the Evolutionary Horsemen will either cost Cena the title or just run in and get the DQ. My secret hope? Batista, despondent over losing earlier in the night, snaps and just attacks both guys. Please turn the man heel, I’m begging out.
Winner: Chris Jericho is keeping the gold. Book it.
Mark Allen: I really would like to see Jericho retain here and have a nice long Title reign but I just don’t see it happen. All the conditions are right for Cena to win the World Championship and put the universe back in order. The question is, does Cena-Batista II happen at Royal Rumble or do they hold off until WrestleMania?
Winner – Cena (new Champion)
Raffi Shamir: I’m probably the biggest Cena mark on Inside Pulse. Keeping that in mind, he shouldn’t win the title just yet. The Garden is likely to erupt for his entrance and the match, but that’s all they’re going to get. The buildup for his title win should be bigger and end in Wrestlemania 25. Besides, Jericho still has things to do as champion. I think this match will take place in the middle of the show towards the end in order to send the crowd home happy with the Hardy win and not the Cena disappointment. Anyway, it won’t be a real loss for Cena – probably a DQ win.
Winner: John Cena by DQ/CO (Jericho retains)
Paul Marshall: I declare this the first pay-per-view where I’ve decided to join Stablewars. With that said, there’s no way Cena wins because Jericho just got the title back a couple weeks back. Also, I don’t think Jericho is going to beat Cena clean. The obvious result?
Result: No Contest (15:00 match time)
Iain Burnside: It is Survivor Series, the pay-to-view home of the screwjob. Another storyline involving McMahonified chicanery is beginning, with Stephanie pissed off at Shane supposedly trying to run things without her help in their father’s absence. Jericho threatened mutiny or anarchy or a lack of free Dr Pepper or whatever should he lose the title. Hell, one of Jericho’s finishers is for all intents and purposes just like the Sharpshooter. Do I have to spell it out for you? Ring the bell, RING THE FUCKING BELL…
Winner – NOT THE HOMETOWN HERO
Casket Match:
Undertaker vs. Big Show
Paul Beasley: Ye gods how I loathe casket matches. They are so bloody mind-numbingly tedious. And given the speed of the two participants this time, it’s going to be even more of a snore-a-thon. Taker’s winning this because Show’s been getting the better of him for a while now, and this is a Taker speciality match. And I’m glad I won’t be watching it. I’d rather watch slugs fuck.
Winner: The Underpanter
Danny Cox: Hmmm, this looks kind of interesting. Not to mention the fact that Jeffykins just beat Undertaker. I’m going out on a limb here and say that Show finally makes a big name for himself after returning and wins a big match.
Winner – Big Show
Andrew Wheeler: “But…Taker always loses his gimmick matches…†Bah. It’s Survivor Series, it’s his show. Besides, this feud has no real heat and needs to die (no pun intended). This would be the perfect opening for Edge to return, but do we really want to rekindle the Edge/Taker feud? If the WWE is smart, they’ll have Undertaker finish Big Show and move on to Jeff Hardy or Kozlov. If not, they’ll have Edge interfere and cost Taker the match. If they really wanna mess with us, they’ll have Edge come back and cost Big Show the match (since Show kinda took his role and has been cozy with his old lady).
Winner: The Undertaker
Mark Allen: This is what the Undertaker is made of: winning plodding gimmick matches against guys bigger than he is at Survivor Series.
Winner – Undertaker
Raffi Shamir: I really don’t care about either of the guys in that match or the match itself.
Winner: Undertaker
Paul Marshall: So the IWC is dubbing this the “Undertaker Sabbatical Match”. Might as well, though I doubt Taker is taking time off since he did so earlier this year.
Winner: Big Show
Iain Burnside: If Edge interferes, we riot. Well, I might. Come on, people. WWE kept Edge out for this long not just to heal up niggling injuries, not just as a reward, but because his feud with Taker had been so epic and so lengthy that they needed the pathos of distance to get Taker set up with a new nemesis. Also, don’t think that Edge’s return is hinging upon Christian returning either. By all accounts, Vince doesn’t rate Christian as anything special and so there is no chance that a major storyline will be made dependent upon him deciding to leave TNA. True, him returning at the supershow taping in Toronto on December 22 would be cool… Still, they could incorporate that into whatever Edge is already doing without any complications. Edge was ‘sent to hell’, so it makes sense that when he returns he would still be the crazy, hardcore hobo that he was on the verge of becoming in August. Comes in through the crowd, doesn’t speak, uses weapons, enjoys fire, pays no heed to rules or even the concept of a ‘match’… just rage, directed at Jeff Hardy (or the wellness of the Hs) as crazy attracts crazy. Then, since his ‘familia’ no longer care, his actual family tries to help him as Christian returns. Or not. Whatever, the important thing to remember is that I still haven’t discussed the Casket Match. And chances are that I won’t, since putting these two guys in a match is like taking a sleeping pill so far as I’m concerned. I will just point out that people bitching about the angle on Smackdown this week where Taker put Vickie Guerrero in the casket are too sensitive for their own good. Get a grip, move on and realise that so far as her on-screen presence goes she is no longer Eddie Guerrero’s Widow, she is Vickie Guerrero: Evil General Manager Extraordinaire. Deal with it.
Winner – BIG PAUL
Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match:
Team Batista (Batista, R-Truth, Matt Hardy, CM Punk and Kofi Kingston) vs. Team Orton (Randy Orton, Cody Rhodes, William Regal, Shelton Benjamin and Mark Henry)
Paul Beasley: You mean this is Survivor Series? And nobody told me? So we’re getting good old-fashioned elimination tag-matches. Fan-bloody-tastic. I always loved these. It does show how poorly thought of ECW is though, that Matt Hardy doesn’t warrant a title-defence, or even the right to captain one of the teams. Expect the faces to win this after some sort of blow-out between Rhodes & Orton.
Winner: Team Batista (Dave, Hardy and Punk to survive).
Danny Cox: R-Truth gone! Shelton gone! Hardy gone! Kofi gone! Punk gone! Batista makes his way through Mark Henry and William Regal before Orton and Rhodes take over!
Winners – Team Orton
Sole Survivors – Orton and Rhodes
Andrew Wheeler: This match has been hyped as “everyone has issue with everyoneâ€. Batista/Orton, sure. R-Truth/Shelton, ok. Matt Hardy/Mark Henry, you betcha. Cody Rhodes/Kofi Kingston, why not? Punk/Regal, well…Regal did trip him. Either way, this is an interesting situation for the WWE. This is Randy Orton’s first PPV match since his injury, so they can’t have him lose. Could he walk away from his team? Maybe. On the other hand, having Batista lose would push him one step further towards the heel turn he needs to take. Everyone aside from Dave and Randy can get pinned clean and no one would bat an eye (the WWE is trying hard for us to forget that Punk was World Champion because Creative is retarded), so it’ll come down to furthering Orton/Batista. Randy needs to be kept strong, so he gets the duke.
Winner: Team Orton
Mark Allen: I love Survivor Series elimination matches, but I just really wish the teams had a little more consistency. It also looks like all of Punk’s heat with Orton has been transferred over to Batista. The cool thing about these ten is that all are at least mildly pushed right now, so I don’t know who has the most to gain with the victory. I would like to see Punk and Kofi win to solidify their Tag Championship win, but I have a feeling it will come down to Orton and Batista. *Flips a coin*
Winner – Randy Orton (sole survivor)
Raffi Shamir: The classic Survivor Series elimination match is one of my all time favorite gimmick matches. When it’s done right it can easily deliver a MOTYC. This one has the potential to deliver big time because only one guy on both teams is completely crap, while the other 9 range from passable to awesome. Orton had a good thing going in this PPV in the past and he can reclaim his spot as master of the elimination matches. Add to that the fact it’s his first PPV match back so he needs to be kept strong. Batista can take the dirty loss here.
Winners: Team Orton (Orton sole survivor)
Paul Marshall: This seems to be one of the better Survivor Series matches because it doesn’t contain the Great Khali. I say it goes down to Orton & Henry v. Batista & CM Punk. Orton gets by Batista via cheating, but Henry falls to CM Punk via confusion.
Winners: Team Batista (CM Punk sole survivor)
Iain Burnside: Wait, people are still considering C.M. Punk a main-eventer? Are we to consider Ronnie Garvin a classic world champion now as well? Anyway, there are plenty of storylines going on here. It’s a big step up from Survivor Series matches in recent years, which lean towards the arbitrary. If I had to choose one to stand out it would be Randy & Randy’s Mates as this is a perfect opportunity for them to take their relationship to the next level at the expense of Dave & Dave’s Lunchbox. Imagine this… Orton is left in the ring, Dave is outside dealing with Manu and maybe Teddy too. Dave heads back to the ring as the referee counts but young Cuddles grabs his legs on the apron. Dave is counted out as Orton looks on, winning the match without ever actually coming to blows with him. Now Randy can be both pleased at Cuddles & Co for proving themselves SNEAKY enough to beat Dave and pissed off at them for being so SNEAKY as to deny him the chance to touch Dave somewhere. The key thing here is SNEAKINESS. It is what separates us from the animals, except for the dyslexic snake.
Winners – RANDY AND CUDDLES
Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match:
Team HBK (Shawn Michaels, Rey Mysterio, The Great Khali and Cryme Tyme) vs. Team JBL (JBL, Kane, MVP, The Miz & John Morrison)
Paul Beasley: Another Survivor Series match? Anyone would think this PPV had a theme or something. Law of averages says there has to be at least one heel-win, so I’m going with JBL and MVP for the win. MVP will then realise his losing streak isn’t ended in a team match and it has to be in a singles match.
Winners: Team JBL
Danny Cox: Cryme Tyme will be gone before long and I’m willing to bet that Khali gets eliminated by countout to do his own Kiss Cam or something mid-match. MVP will be gone before you realize it thanks to his depush beyond all belief. I hope Kane finally kills Rey dead! HBK pulls out a miracle somehow.
No pun intended.
Winners – Team HBK
Sole Survivor – HBKizzle
Andrew Wheeler: Since the heels will win one Elimination Match, the faces need to win the other one. Team JBL should be Team J.O.B. since all those guys can take the pin no problem. And don’t feel bad about Miz and Morrison losing since they just beat Mysterio and Michaels relatively clean. Time to return that job, kids.
Winner: Team HBK
Mark Allen: This should be Miz & Morrison’s coming out party, but I’m sure it won’t. Porter won’t win, Khali won’t win and Cryme Tyme won’t either. I’ll go with HBK and Mysterio as the winners after the pin both Miz and Morrison.
Winner – HBK and Mysterio
Raffi Shamir: Time for a little fantasy booking. What I really want to see is the match coming down to HBK & Rey vs. Miz & Morrison, with Miz & Morrison eliminating both faces. This could lead to a prolonged feud that will culminate in two singles matches in Wrestlemania 25, where Rey beats Miz and Morrison beats HBK. Sadly, I realize this is just my markdom for Miz & Morrison speaking and it’s not realistic. The faces will win here and JBL will probably be the most dominant on his team.
Winners: Team HBK (HBK and Rey survive)
Paul Marshall: Of course this one has a good chance to suck. Let’s start by getting rid of the deadweight. You’re down to Michaels and Mysterio against Miz & Morrison. Give these two about 20 minutes by themselves and let Michaels fight the handicap match and giving Miz & Morrison the push to the stratosphere.
Winners: Team JBL (Miz & Morrison survive)
Iain Burnside: Well, given everything else that I’ve got going on in this show, it’s time to give the faces a harmless win…
Winners – SHAWN & REY: HIGH PANTS ROMANCE
Divas Survivor Series Elimination Match:
Team SmackDown (Michelle McCool, Maria, Maryse, Victoria and Natalya) vs. Team Raw (Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Kelly Kelly, Candice Michelle and Jillian)
Paul Beasley: And the boredom reaches whole new levels. Blah, blah, blah. Team RAW win, with Beth & Mickie surviving to glare at each other at the end of the match. And only teenage boys will care.
Winner: Team RAW.
Danny Cox: I wanna see Natalya Vs. Phoenix. Straight up that would be much more interesting then champ vs. champ (Michelle Vs. Beth). I dunno and don’t much care, but could be fun for a few minutes.
Winners – Team Smackdown
Sole Survivors – Michelle and Natalya
Andrew Wheeler: The three heels on Smackdown get pinned no problem, miscommunication between McCool and Maria, game over.
Winner: Team RAW
Mark Allen: I’m surprised they made this elimination style. I guess they figured they had enough talented Divas to work a full elimination match. Looking at the sides, I say RAW wins this one. I would think Beth and Mickie standing tall in the end, but they have been pushing K2 hard lately so I think she and Beth will survive.
Winner – Beth and Kelly
Raffi Shamir: If this match goes over 8 minutes, it will be the biggest shocker of the night. I guess the RAW divas will take it.
Winners: Team RAW (Beth Phoenix and Kelly Kelly survive)
Paul Marshall: There’s a good chance this gets changed from Elimination rules to one fall to a win rules. If it’s the latter, expect a short five minute match and Kelly Kelly getting a fluke rollup pin on Natalya. For the former, I wouldn’t push this past ten minutes with Kelly Kelly & Mickie James surviving the SmackDown onslaught.
Winners: Team RAW (Kelly Kelly & Mickie James survive)
Iain Burnside: I have the Raw men winning in the other matches, which are technically interbrand affairs too, so here I shall side with the Rawettes losing. This should of course happen thanks to Santino Marella, giving us the awesome dynamic of all the Raw Divas hating him except for Beth Phoenix… or does she? Also, let’s not overlook the potential hilarity of Santino finding the Bella twins and making a happy nest in his unmentionables…
Winners – SOME SORT OF SMACKDOWN
So that’s what we think. Don’t forget to follow all the action of Survivor Series later tonight with special live coverage right here on Pulse Wrestling.
