– Taped from Philadelphia, PA
– Your hosts are Dick Graham & Killer Ken Resnick
Paul Roma v. Steve Lombardi
Well it wouldn’t be a late 80s house show without this match kicking it off.
Roma powers him into the corner to start and catches him with a powerslam, then takes him down with a headlock. Lombardi pounds away on the ropes, but Roma catches him with a bodypress for two and goes to the armbar. He controls the arm on the mat, but Lombardi slugs out and gets a backbreaker for two. Faceplant gets two. Lombardi gives him the dreaded boot to the bread basket and goes to his own side headlock on the mat, fighting off Roma’s attempt to power up. Lombardi with more weak offense, but Roma powers him down and hits a clothesline out of the corner to come back. Monkey flip is blocked with an atomic drop, however, and Steve follows with a suplex for two. Roma whips him into the post and pounds away, then follows with a dropkick that sends Lombardi running to the other corner. Hooking clothesline gets two. Top rope sunset flip finishes at 9:50. This was your standard match between these two. **1/2
Butch Reed v. Dick Slater
I feel like I saw this one on an episode of Primetime earlier in the year. Reed runs to start and Slater beats on him in the corner. That takes on a weird tint, being that Slater is playing a proudly Confederate redneck and Reed is a black guy. Reed comes back with a slam and chokes Slater out behind the ref’s back while working on a headlock. And yeah, more choking. Weird analogy from the announcers, as they note that Reed’s Wrestlemania opponent Koko B. Ware is “built like a bowling pin — very tough to knock down.” Bowling pins are suddenly tough to knock down? That’s kind of the point of them. Reed backdrops out of a piledriver attempt and Slater comes back with a small package for two instead. Neckbreaker gets two. Elbow misses, and Reed puts him down with a piledriver as a result. Slater bails to the floor to regroup, but Reed follows and Slater sends him into the post for the brawl. They both beat the count back in and Slater goes up with his flying elbow, but Slick puts the foot on the ropes. Slater chases after him, probably because he thought Slick was going to marry his daughter or something, and that allows Reed to get the cheap pin in the corner at 8:22. Well, no cheaper than the racial humor, but this didn’t give me much more to work with, so blame the dull match. *1/2
Meanwhile, Outback Jack throws another shrimp on the barbie or whatever. No wonder they didn’t give him promo time. Maybe if he spoke English instead of whatever Australians speak, he’d get over.
Outback Jack v. Frenchy Martin
Here’s another one that was on Primetime in some form a million times. Jack powers him down and hiptosses him, sending Martin running to the floor. Back in, Jack puts him on the top rope and that goes nowhere, so Frenchy goes low to take over. He pounds away as Resnick gets a SWEET segue (“You don’t want to turn your back on a snake like Martin. And speaking of snakes, Jake the Snake takes on Honky Tonk Man at Wrestlemania…”) and Jack finishes with the boomerang clothesline at 4:55.
WWF World tag titles: The Hart Foundation v. The Islanders
Back in the slower-moving 80s, the Hart Foundation’s title win over the Bulldogs was still fresh and still giving them nuclear heat. Big stall to start and Haku puts Neidhart down with chops . They do the test of strength and Haku dropkicks out of that, then sends Anvil reeling with a headbutt. So it’s over to Bret, and he gets kicked in the face right off the bat and put down with an atomic drop. As a note, in the mind of Dick Graham, Haku = “Tama” and Tama = “Afa”. Resnick, meanwhile, feels that Tama = “Haku” and Haku = “Tama”. Tama chops Bret down and out and the champs go for advice from Jimmy Hart, and it’s back to Anvil again. Tama showboats and tags Haku in, and the Islanders pinball Neidhart in the corner and double-team the arm. Tama is actually one step ahead of Bret and evades the cheapshot from the apron, but Anvil just clobbers him from behind anyway. That’s why they’re the tag champs! Bret drops a leg as I stop and ponder: I know that, in kayfabe, the purpose of wrist tape is for grip during holds, but what’s the purpose (either real or kayfabe) for the Islanders to have ANKLE tape? I never got that. Tama gets choked in the corner and Anvil drops him on the top rope, which allows Bret to choke him out from the apron. He’s having a grand old time doing it, which is a nice bit of facial expression. Haku has had ENOUGH and fights off the champs, so they toss Tama to the floor and the Islanders regroup. Back in, Anvil with a standing dropkick that gets two for Bret, but Tama gets a sunset flip. Bret makes the tag on the way down, however, and Anvil beats Tama down for two. Quality tag team stuff here. Anvil goes to a chinlock and Tama elbows out, so Anvil puts him back to the floor again as Tama is a bump machine tonight. Back in, Bret with a backbreaker for two. Neidhart comes in and collides with Tama. Tama goes for a slam and Bret dropkicks them over, but Tama rolls through for two. Big pop for that spot. Bret goes with biting in the corner, eschewing subtlety altogether, but he runs into a knee and it’s hot tag Haku. He fires away on the champs and there’s a malfunction at the junction, but Danny Davis makes a nuisance of himself while Tama gets the flying bodypress. Davis turns them over and Bret gets the pin to retain at 18:20. Classic Hart Foundation! ***3/4
Tom Zenk v. Greg Valentine
Quite the fruity pink robe for Valentine. Hammer takes him down with a snapmare, but misses the elbow, and Zenk sends him into the corner and starts working on the arm. Valentine with another snapmare for two and he pounds away in the corner, but Zenk goes back to the arm. Zenk whiffs on a bodypress, however, and Valentine hits him with a shoulderbreaker and chokes away in the corner. Valentine goes to a surfboard hold as the announcers make fun of Bob Uecker and ponder how many names he’ll butcher. Pot, kettle, black. Valentine goes for a tombstone, but then changes it to a simple slam instead and gets two. That was weird. Greg suplexes him onto the top rope and goes to the figure-four, but Zenk actually fights to the ropes. He’s lucky Valentine didn’t have his shinguard yet. Zenk goes to the floor to regroup and draws Valentine out for the brawl, and they head in and out for the chase. Of course, Valentine catches him with a boot coming in, and then tosses him right back out again as this thing is going nowhere. Valentine tries a suplex and Zenk reverses to a rollup for two, and a pair of dropkicks get two. Zenk tries a headlock and they do an awkward spot where Valentine drops him on the top rope to escape, and that’s a DQ at 11:20. This was WAY worse than you’d expect, as they blew a bunch of stuff and never found their rhythm. *
Rick Martel v. Brutus Beefcake
And of course the natural other half. Beefcake does some strutting to start and gets a couple of cheapshots, then plays “hide the foreign object”, the easiest and yet most effective heel bit you can do. Brutus pounds away in the corner, and that gets Martel upset enough to fire back and send Beefcake out of the ring. Back in, Brutus goes to the headlock, but Martel hiptosses out of it and starts working the arm. Beefcake pounds him in the corner and tries his high knee, but he misses and hits the turnbuckle. Martel starts working on the leg and holds a leglock on the mat. Resnick actually notes “Turnabout is fair play” and “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander”. Really? What human being actually says that? Beefcake comes back with a stungun and they do the knucklelock on the mat, but of course Brutus lands on the knees and Martel comes back. Beefcake hits him with a kneelift, however, and presses him into a backbreaker for two. He pounds away and goes up, but Martel hits him on the way down and makes the comeback. A shot to the turnbuckle gets two. Abdominal stretch, but Beefcake hiptosses out, so Martel catches him with a sleeper. Beefcake runs him into the corner to break, and they both tumble out for the lame-ass countout at 15:30. Pretty pedestrian stuff in the days before Beefcake could hold his own or, you know, teach celebrities to wrestle. **
Piper’s Pit, with special guest Danny Davis! Piper sucks up to the crowd by saying they should send their garbage to Montreal, because they can’t play hockey there. Which is an odd thing to say considering Montreal was the defending champions that year, although the Flyers made it to the finals later in the year. Probably just cheap face heat, but geez, do your research. Anyway, first question for Davis: Why ARE you such a jerk? Davis: “What are you insinuating, Piper?” Piper: “That you’re a cheat, a thief, and you’re ugly on top of it.” Davis claims to be as fair as any ref in the WWF, so Piper brings in Joey Marella, who notes that Davis sucks. Davis, however, brings out Adrian Adonis, and the fight is on. Gorilla Monsoon, at ringside for some reason, quickly hauls Adonis out of there and back to the dressing room, leaving tough-talking Davis alone with Piper. You can guess how that goes for him. Great fun.
Dino Bravo v. SD Jones
Bravo attacks and slugs Jones down, but SD comes back with a hiptoss out of the corner. Bravo pounds away and goes to a boston crab, and the side slam finishes at 3:08. Total squash. 1/2*
Hulk Hogan & Roddy Piper v. Kamala & Paul Orndorff
This should be all kinds of fun. The heels get whipped into each other and Hogan tosses Kamala over the top, as Piper starts proper with Orndorff. The faces take turns on the arm and Hogan gets the corner clothesline before adding a shot to Kamala and ramming them together again. Atomic drop for Orndorff and he tags out to Kamala, so Piper goes to the eyes and fires away in the corner to a gigantic reaction. Back to Hulk and they give Kamala a double boot before Hulk easily slams him and drops an elbow. Back to Piper, but Kamala pushes him back into the corner and the heels quickly take over and Piper’s selling like he’s been stabbed, poisoned and shot. Orndorff drops the boogie woogie elbow and goes to the chinlock, but Piper fights up and we get the false tag as they run through all the greatest hits. Kamala tackles Piper to prevent a tag. Orndorff lures Hulk in, allowing Kamala to splash Piper, but Hulk breaks up the pin. Paul is back in to beat on Piper’s shoulder and he goes to the nerve hold, but Piper slips out and it’s hot tag Hulk. He’s the house of fire and runs Paul into both corners, but Kamala gets a shot from behind and it’s BONZO GONZO. The heels take turns nailing Piper, but of course one misses and Kamala hits Orndorff by mistake, allowing Hogan to roll him up for the pin at 8:56. They hit all the beats perfectly and sent the crowd home with exactly what they wanted to see. *** And thus Piper makes his final appearance in Philly before retiring to a successful movie career and never wrestling again!
Good, fun show, with no real stinkers.
And yes, I know Australians speak English.
