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JAY-Z WANTS TO BEAT THE PISS OUT OF CHRIS BROWN, AND WE SHOULD LET HIM

So it’s pretty much been confirmed that Rihanna was, indeed (and very unfortunately), the victim of Chris Brown‘s unchecked aggression last weekend. As the story has gradually unfolded, we’ve learned of the former being checked into a Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles hospital with serious injuries, and that she was the one who called 911 after the incident, saying that Brown, 19, had struck and threatened to kill her, choking her into unconsciousness after she threw the keys to his Lamborghini out of the window during a squabble.

The attack left the singer, 20, with a badly swollen black eye and hand prints all over her arms. She has been cooperating with police in their criminal investigation into the case.

According to a source inside the Roc-A-Fella crew, Jay-Z, who discovered and helped Rihanna launch her career, and is still close with her, was reportedly furious after finding out about the incident, warning of “retribution” in store for Brown.

“He hit the roof,” the unnamed source told US Weekly. “Chris is a walking dead man. He messed with the wrong crew.”

Everybody knows that you never make a camel angry. They have been known to bite and even spit at people. I say we let Jay-Z or whomever Jay-Z wants to throw at Chris Brown kick the living shit out of him. It could be broadcast LIVE on pay-per-view. I would buy it.

(EOnline.com, WENN.com, MTV.com)