Glazer:
Hey! 2 Guys Time!
Grey:
Welcome back everyone! Sorry for the lack of last week, but Fifth Weeks are the comic version of seasonal depression.
Glazer:
Today, we’re Marvelites.
Grey:
There was some good out of Marvel, as well as one of the worst pieces of trash I’ve picked up since Fear Itself.
Glazer:
Oh god, just get it out of the way.
Grey:
Marvel shat on the Young Avengers as a concept just like they have so many other potential goldmines.
Glazer:
Well, I don’t know how many others…
Grey:
The recent attempt at Spider-Girl, for one.
Glazer:
That was a gold mine?
Grey:
I said potential.
But really, my issue here is that the Young Avengers debuted after House of M, and they were red hot, and they did that thirteen issue first run, and then poof, nothing. There’s a YA Presents mini by various creative teams, which was good, and Stature and Vision joined Slott’s Mighty Avengers, and there were some bad team ups with the Runaways, but really, Marvel back burnered them immediately so Heinberg could come back and do his follow up story.
Grey:
So his followup story finally arrives and…he kills a few characters, gives the team an emo break up, has the gay kids get engaged, and then lets us know that Wanda Maximoff has been running around the Marvel Universe since about the time of Fear Itself and nobody knew because this mini took two years to do nine issues.
Glazer:
This should have been given to someone else ages ago.
Grey:
They could have let anyone handle it and turned it into something special, but instead they let it sit until nobody cared, then they promoted the hell out of the follow up, and then….we get this.
The book offended me as a reader. They literally blamed everything bad Wanda ever did on Dr. Doom.
Glazer:
Seems like a usual terrible retcon.
Grey:
There were more death threats from Cyclops in this mini than I’ve seen across all of the X title since he took over the X-Men.
Glazer:
I wish Cyclops wasn’t even in it.
Grey:
He literally tells Wanda he won’t kill her because she’s going to create another House of M and he wants to kill her after she does that.
And Captain America is all “Once an Avengers always an Avengers! Come home!”
Glazer:
What the hell.
Grey:
When…even Bendis would have had Steve slap cuffs on her.
Quite literally the only remotely decent thing about the series is that Scott Lang isn’t dead anymore.
But his daughter is, and that outweighs his rez, so it doesn’t help the book not be fucking terrible at all.
Glazer:
Let’s move on to Marvel’s good teen book.
Grey:
Thank you, I needed this segue.
Glazer:
What happened this month?
Grey:
The Runaways showed up at the home of the Avengers Academy looking to find a way to a dinosaur dimension to save Old Lace, we get a superhero misunderstanding fight, we get reminded that the Runaways don’t trust adults and…we get reminded that they’re right not to.
Glazer:
Ha, well, no, in fairness, Molly and the other girl should probably have a real home.
Grey:
I don’t think Klara could stand a real home, they took her out of a ridiculous pedo marriage in the early 20th century. She’d probably think foster dad expected sexual favors.
Glazer:
Which means she needs counseling, as well.
Grey:
Those two REALLY need actual homes and adults and guidance, and I’ve been saying as much since Runaways was still its own book.
Glazer:
So Pym and Tigra are being kind of dick-ish, but are also totally correct.
Grey:
Bingo. They’re being responsible adults. Which also means that they took enough time to realize that so long as Nico, Chase, and company can find them…those two little girls are always going to be on the run.
The Runaway lifestyle makes more sense for them, they’re older, they’re self reliant, they’ve been to high school, they aren’t completely destroyed by being runaways.
Glazer:
Makes sense. The Old Lace plot is really just a way to get them to the point where they have a showdown about the littleuns.
Grey:
Yup. Though it was so nice to see Old Lace again.
There was some real gold in the issue though, I loved Molly talking about costumed people always trying to give her homes and schools, and how Wolverine is always a part of these teams.
Glazer:
It was nice to see the Runaways, which was clearly the selling point of the issue given how much they were focussed on.
The Wolverine line is my moment of the week.
Grey:
It’s a toss up for me, that was awesome, but I also loved Victor gushing about the White Tiger and then she just gives Reptil the dirty look for being such a bad latin hero.
“So I’m Mexican and I liked Captain America! Sue me!”
Glazer:
I love Reptil – he’s my favorite in this book.
Grey:
My favorite is Finesse, but she was a non-factor here this issue.
I loved Nico and Hazmat.
Glazer:
They paired the right members of both teams, for sure.
Grey:
I would be absolutely fine with Karolina coming in full time to date Julie Power.
Glazer:
I’d be fine with Runaways as regular guest stars.
Grey:
I could live with that.
Glazer:
Hopefully, with a spinoff eventually!
Grey:
Just so long as it doesn’t turn into the crap that was Runaways volume 3.
Glazer:
Give it to Gage.
Grey:
Gage could do it.
Glazer:
Obviously since he’s writing them so well here. Any final Runaways thoughts?
Grey:
I’m so happy nobody bothered to explain how Chase came back after quitting the team and getting run over by a truck.
Glazer:
I didn’t read Vol 3. It’s better to pretend it didn’t exist.
Grey:
The only reason I acknowledge it is because that’s where Old Lace ‘died’ too.
Glazer:
Sigh. Rating?
Grey:
I’m going with my heart here, the book wasn’t perfect, but so far it’s been the single most enjoyable thing I’ve read this week. I’m giving it a 9.
Glazer:
I’ll go with an 8. Very good, if not overly memorable. Lots of fun moments and characterization.
Grey:
The Runaways didn’t suck for the first time since BKV quit writing them.
Glazer:
I liked a bit of Whedon’s run, but mostly agree
Grey:
Whedon had good ideas and characterization, but the story was just….it never clicked.
Glazer:
Fair enough. Speaking of not clicking… Age of Apocalypse began!
Grey:
Did they really need to depower Jean and Sabretooth? Couldn’t they have just nerfed Jean down and left Creed alone?
Glazer:
Did they really need to make it about a bunch of humans I don’t care about? This has nothing to do with Age of Apocalypse. It’s just a generic dystopian future.
Grey:
I was excited for this, and now I don’t care nearly as much.
I’m going to give it an arc to see how it starts, but there will be no immediate pull lists or long term hopes for this book.
Glazer:
I don’t care about this book. I like Lapham, but…no.
Grey:
I’m giving him the first arc just because he’s Lapham, but this book needs to find a real focus fast. Because human freedom fighters with no chance doesn’t lend itself to anything longterm. Especially when they’ve made it clear that the world will always go to hell.
Glazer:
And more, they picked humans I have no sympathy for in Marvel. Apparently if some mutants are evil, that makes these racists all right?
Grey:
I understand the whole “Enemy of my enemy” thing, and evil here being good there, or whatever, but they chose straight up horrible monsters from the Marvel universe and said “heroes”!
This isn’t like Alexander Luthor of Earth 3 fighting the Crime Syndicate.
Glazer:
I know and agree. What a mess. And they just got me interested with that excellent AoA X-Force arc only to use none of those characters.
Grey:
Did they really need to kill everyone and then depower Jean and Creed?
Glazer:
They kill everyone in AoA so often that I just don’t care anymore.
Grey:
Like, Scott being in next issue intrigues me because I like AoA Scott, but I’m still bitter over the fact that they killed 90% of the X-Men off panel.
Glazer:
It’s weak. and Scott died in the original AoA. Sigh.
Grey:
He shouldn’t have, bad writing had him die via Havok.
Glazer:
It was supposed to, originally, suggest genetic differences between them and our version, but meh.
Grey:
Yeah, but there was a scene in Factor X where they cancelled each other out, and later again in Sinister Bloodlines.
Glazer:
Was there in Factor X? I don’t recall that. And Sinister Bloodlines came later.
Grey:
It’s been a while since I read Factor X, I could be wrong, and I do know that Sinister Bloodlines came later…but I do enjoy that one shot.
I think the Age of Apocalypse exists better in the happy memories of awesome times.
…and Exiles.
Glazer:
Agreed. So I’m giving this a 4 and dropping it.
Grey:
I’m giving it a 4 and sticking it out for 3 issues, most likely while regretting them.
But you know what? I’d rather read it again than pick up Childrens Crusade again.
Glazer:
Ha goodnight everybody!
Grey:
Catch you all in a day or two for DC!
