DESTRUCITY – With CB and KON (Ultimate Warrior, Vince McMahon, Hulk Hogan)

Columns, Features, Interviews, Top Story

Welcome to whatever-the-fuck we’re going to call this. I’m Joined by CB today, and possibly over the next few weeks, to discuss old wrestlers and whatever relevance they may or may not have in the modern world of sports entertainment. Today, we tackle WARRIOR! 

 

**SKRONK**

 

CB: Thanks for having me be a part of this KON. It’s strange being on the other side of these interviews, so I’ll do my best now that the questions are pointed in my direction.

KON: What did you think of The Ultimate Warrior back in the late 80’s/early 90’s?

CB: Back in the day, the Ultimate Warrior was my favourite WWF superstar. I loved when he beat Hulk Hogan at WrestleMania VI, and I hated when the Undertaker locked him into the airtight casket. I also was really freaked out by the Warrior segments with Jake the Snake back in the day, and the “never trust a snake” pay-off still sticks with me to this day.

I’m glad I was a kid back then, that I didn’t know any better about Warrior’s backstage politicking and shenanigans. No, back then the Ultimate Warrior could do no wrong in my book, and that was due to my own innocence at the time as a younger viewer.

KON: I was even younger than you would have been, so I missed out on the whole “who the fuck is this guy?” stuff and dropped straight into “a rocket ship straight up into space…” territory. Still, he wasn’t that strange compared to the rest of the roster at the time.

You mention politics. Did Warrior really get political? From what I’ve seen (and generally understand), Hogan didn’t want Warrior to get his spot. WWE’s The Self-Destruction Of The Ultimate Warrior tells a different story, but they also seem to rip on him for no real reason (like calling him insane for changing his name to Warrior when a lot of wrestlers back then did the same thing. It was one of the only ways stop Vince from owning the name).

CB: Yeah, I don’t know what to believe, but I’m just glad as a kid my mind wasn’t thinking like that. 

KON: It’s the only WWE DVD I’ve seen where they go out of their way to shit on someone. They even have an unwell looking Bobby “The Brain” Heenan take shots at the guy. They’ll be like “He was a fucking nut-job” and the next clip is about Warrior returning to work for them (which he did a few hundred times). If he was crazy and incredibly difficult to work with, why the fuck would Vince be like “James, here’s another two million”?

Warrior returned in ’92 to save Hoke Ogan from Sid and Papa Shango. Were you still like “Fuck yeah! FEEL THE POWER OF THE WARRIAAAAAAAAAH!” at this point?

CB: Nah, by 1992 I was over Warrior. I believe that was around the time where The Rockers were breaking up, so things were getting interesting with Shawn Michaels. 

KON: If Michaels was your cup of tea, you probably missed out on the monstrosity that was The Renegade over on WCW during the mid-90’s. They had about three guys do Warrior-like characters back then. Even Brutus (pre “Booty Man” gimmick) would run down and shake the ropes. Do you think WCW had tried to sign him by this point, possibly to boost Hogan’s popularity?

CB: It’s possible Warrior was on WCW’s radar. I mean, everyone from WWF was kind of given carte blanche over at Ted Turner’s rasslin’ company if they ended up signing on the dotted line. And Warrior did go to WCW at some point, making Brutus his Disciple and starting the One Warrior Nation! 

KON: But not before returning to the WWF again in 1996. Any thoughts on that fantastic run?

CB: Triple H is still stewing over that one, I believe. That second run was absolutely atrocious and ultimately pointless.

KON: 1996 also marked the release of the WARRIOR comic book, something that still gets a pop when quoted.

I see the comics as a bit of a cash-in. Warrior wasn’t getting Mania money or much of a cut from WWF merch by this point, so it’s like he decided to take it into his own hands.

I imagine the existence of WARRIOR as a comic helped him out during his first legal battle with Vince over the name/branding. The books themselves are very much in the style of Warrior’s promos and have that stereotypical 90’s look (ridiculously exaggerated muscles and whatnot) about them, but they really don’t have much in the way of plot. The series ran for less than a year, so it’s possible that they were just rushed out to give him the legal edge.

CB: I never actually saw the comic, but I’m sure he was a better artist than Jeff Hardy!

KON: The Sharp Brothers handled the art on the comic. They also worked on Warrior’s jacket and promos when he arrived in WCW during 1998…

I remember weird stuff. Hogan would see Warrior in the mirror and freak out, but no one else in the room would see it. The story was that Warrior was making Hogan crazy, but, considering everyone watching Nitro (including those in attendance) also seen Warrior, it was Hogan’s chums that ended up looking like idiots.

I remember really liking Warrior in WCW. The NWO had run its course by that point and they needed someone massive to beat Hogan. The pay-off, with the botched fireball, Horace going within 10′ of a ring, Brutus playing the role of Sandman’s son… I can’t say it was fantastic.

CB: Agreed. Warrior really faded from my view after that, regardless of all the crazy stuff he says today.

KON: Again, the WCW run could’ve just been to secure the name WARRIOR. The legal battle was still going in 1998 and both sides probably had to step up their game after that Nitro appearance.

When his WCW run ended, it was like he fell of the face of the earth. No cameos, no indy bookings, no more comics, nothing. It was 2006 or something before I found out he was doing “motivational seminars” at universities. That’s when the “queering doesn’t make the world work” thing popped up. I can see where he was coming from with the remark. Men and women need to fuck now and then to keep the human race afloat and whatnot, sure, but I find it strange that a wordsmith like Warrior would choose that particular phrasing.

CB: LOL, Warrior the wordsmith. 

KON: Well, we are talking about the guy who came up with “Destrucity”…

If you re-watch his old promos, or even re-watch stuff on youtube like his shoot on Hogan, you’ll see that Warrior is a man who chooses each word carefully.  I think the “queering doesn’t make the world work” video was the start of all the “Warrior is fucking insane” stuff on the internet. His long-winded WCW promos may have played a part, but those actually made sense in context.

When do you think the whole “Warrior is insane” thing started on the internets?

CB: 2006 sounds about right, when his website started.

Have you heard his shoots on Hogan, Hunter and Nash?

KON: The Hogan shoot seemed pretty legit. Hogan did an interview shortly after Savage died and said the two of them were close towards the end an a bunch of other shite. Savage blamed Hogan for the breakup with Elizabeth back in 1992 and it seems unlikely that he’d wait almost 20 years to bury the hatchet. Everything else in the video was almost common knowledge, apart from the story about Hogan’s (now ex) wife being whored out for drugs/money.

The Nash thing was strange. How many people have complained over the years about The Clique/NWO politics? Why would Nash decide to call out someone who wasn’t even involved with the business at that point?

CB: Yeah that’s a good question. Though my favourite shoot interview ever is Val Venis on Melina and Morrison. 

KON: I’d probably go with Cornette’s Youshoot.

I guess that’s another thing that separates Warrior from most other wrestlers though. If Warrior feels like saying something, he just uploads to youtube. Scott Hall did the same for a while, as did Raven and a few others, but Warrior seems to be the only one updating on a regular basis. I guess he really has been good with his money, most guys from that “era” have about 40 shite RF interviews.

That reminds me… I was on warrioruniversity.com about a year or so ago and noticed a banner offering a “Free ring worn Warrior arm tassel with every purchase.” I thought “Fuck, that’s kinda sad. He must really need the cash.” Then I noticed that everything in the store was a collectors item and sold for $500+.

Now he has this reality show coming up…

CB: I think Warrior’s show would be better if Scott Steiner was given an open mic every week. 

KON: Every show would be better with that!

I guess this is the point where I ask for your thoughts on a Warrior return, but I can’t see him going to TNA while Hogan is still breathing (no matter how often Sting says “it’s great here, buddy”). WWE might be an option, depending on where he and Vince stand. Warrior has appeared in two recent WWE videogames (Legends of Wrestlemania and All-Stars), so they must have some sort of working relationship.

CB: The closest Warrior will ever come to going back to WWE is if Howard Finkel turns heel again. 

I would love to see Warrior in TNA though, even if it was for one night only, so I can hear those magical words from my childhood one last time:

“Hogannnnnnnnn…”

One last note KON: Thanks for the talk. I will forever appreciate your lesson on Destrucity.

KON: Thank you for taking part, CB.

 

That about wraps things up for this instalment. If you can think of any wrestlers we should cover, just let me know in the comments.

If you’d like to take CB’s place in one of these, I suggest you meet him at Vasquez Rocks, California (bring a cannon).

 

Martin is a mediocre blogger who somehow managed to blag his way onto the Pulse Wrestling team. When not writing about men in spandex, he can be found fannying about with synthesizers. He goes by the names KON in the comments section & martyrshow on the twittors.