Hasn’t Got A Prayer

Columns

Hasn’t Got A Prayer

(parody of Livin’ On A Prayer by Richie Sambora, Jon Bon Jovi, Desmond Child; performed by Bon Jovi)

(apologies to everyone involved – I’m old and going senile)

 

 

Hassan used to work for the ‘E

Benoit was a scalp

Double champ was he… so rough, not tough

US Champ for three hundred days

Then lost for five months, lost incentive pay

In the… story

 

He left but got to keep the name MVP

Though it didn’t make a difference

To the New Japanese

Won just one title, that’s not a lot

So he was out like a shot

 

[Chorus:]

Whooah, wasn’t quite there

Noo-oh, hasn’t got a prayer

Next promotion he’ll make it, I swear

Nooo-oh, hasn’t got a prayer

 

Left New Japan, out for a year

Made some money, Twitter he used

To fans he talked – not tough, not tough

Then he turned up in TNA

The Myst’ry Investor

The same role played

By Ric Flair so that’s… okay

 

So TNA was all he could get?

Does he think he’ll make a difference

Where others haven’t yet?

They’ve got each other. Mr. MVP

And her – that chick called Dixie

 

[Chorus]

 

So here they come now, ready or not

The ‘E must be scared with the rivals they’ve got

 

[Chorus]

 

 

Australian. Father. Perpetual student. Started watching wrestling before Wrestlemania 1. Has delusions of grandeur and was known to regularly get the snot beaten out of him in a wrestling ring. Also writes occasionally in other Pulse sections.Thinks Iron Mike Sharpe is underrated. http://stevengepp.wordpress.com