Forever Heel: Where Do We Go From Here? PLUS Top 5 Most Ridiculous Military Heels

Columns, Top Story

I’m back this week. I spent last week doing office work, and generally feeling fatigued from staying under florescent lighting.

Since Elimination Chamber is over, I’m wondering what’s happening to some of these heels? Is Dave Otunga coming back, is Adam Rose going to keep the Adam Rose gimmick? Kevin Owens Vs Joe? Let’s see what I think about all this, since I can save wrestling, and bring down Smarktopia.

-I know this isn’t a heel thing, but I think Zack Ryder learned his lesson. I’d like to see more of him, but he needs to stay face because he could complement guys like Ziggler, and Cena. I don’t believe his gimmick is a problem, or that he was comedic mostly in that gimmick. Comedy wrestling isn’t the kiss of death some believe. I think millennials over think wrestling too much? Ziggler could be World Champ tomorrow, and no one will stop watching over it.

– I was thinking WWE could be building toward Owens Vs Ryback, to unite the U.S. And I.C. belts. If that happens I don’t think Owens needs to win either, and Ryback could use the win. Again, you can always rebuild a heel.

– Speaking of rebuilding heels, I’m hearing Adam Rose is changing his gimmick some what. I’m guessing he’ll just play a heel without his party, and wear black, and be boring like Sandow was a year ago. I was never impressed with Leo Kruger as a gimmick, but if they made him an insane South African Sgt Slaughter, I’d be down with that. I could see Rose as a Charles Manson like party man/cult leader, but Bray has that locked up still. Bray isn’t even playing a cult leader anymore, and is playing one to perfection. I’m afraid we’ll just get Adam Rose being an idiot, like Marvelous Marc Mero, and have a meaningless TV feud with Fandango.

– Speaking of locked up gimmicks. Bo Dallas and New Day are great, even with similar gimmicks. Fans hate both gimmicks, which I’m positive makes Bo and New Day happy as hell. I think WWE needs more heels that fans can’t respect. Don’t just have heels walk quietly to the ring because people think quiet wrestlers are badass. Let Wade Barrett give his bad news, by telling the fans they live in a dump of a town. Cheap heat isn’t a bad thing, it’s just cheap, and easy.

– I’m wondering where Tyler Breeze is going. Is he going to be NXT’s # 2 contender forever? He’s probably not on the main roster because there’s no room. We already have Fandango and Adam Rose. I’d like to see people talk about Breeze with the need for homophobic remarks. The character has never come out, and no one in creative wanted a storyline where he would marry Callisto. That was made up by some bored Fb dirt sheeter. Also would it be so bad to have two men, married to each other, as a tag team or something? No it wouldn’t, unless you’re a primate, and you don’t need to give an opinion. You need to eat more bananas. Monkey head.

Heel of the Week is Kevin Owens, and Seth Rollins. They both had wins that fed our heel brains.

Top Ridiculous Military Heels

5) Pitbull Pitman

4) Iraqi Sympathizer Sgt Slaughter

3) Kurrgan

2) Buddy Lee Parker

1) Cobra ( Technically he’s CIA)

CH Punk comes from Beverly Hills, California; but considers himself a citizen of the World. Punk also turned heel at age 5, after receiving a LJN Iron Sheik figure for Christmas. On that day he vowed he would stuff his Sheik figure up Hulk Hogan's nose, to ruin Hulkamania. By 1995 Hogan had already ruined it without CH's help.