10 Thoughts On… WWE Monday Night Raw 05.02.2016 (US Title Battle Royal, Little Naitch/Ric Flair, Ambrose Asylum Canceled)

10 Thoughts, Reviews

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1. We kick off with a recap of the Payback main event which makes it look exactly as overbooked as it was. And now we’ve got Steph in the ring with a microphone. New era my ass.

2. After what feels like seven hours of taking, Kevin Owens comes out to make things slightly more interesting. He wants an IC title shot, but so does Swiss super stripper Cesaro, so the match is on!

3. Any time Kevin Owens is in the ring is gold, and Cesaro makes a great opponent who seems to pull out a new move in every match. Miz was relatively bland on commentary, but that didn’t detract from an entertaining, hard hitting match. Sami hits the ring after the DQ to stake his claim on the title, and this is shaping up to be a solid program.

4. The Bullet Club vs Reigns and family could be an interesting match, which is more than I can say for Goldust vs Tyler Breeze. So much bulls**t going on outside the ring that nobody notices Breeze’s first win since he got to Raw.

5. New Day are out next, giving a shoutout to the injured Enzo Amore. The Vaudvillains come out to talk up their part in his demise, and then the Dudley Boys come out for some reason. Big Cass comes out to make it an 8-man tag, which is about as good as most WWE multi person tag matches – not awful, but not great. The only person who really got over was Cassidy, which isn’t a bad thing considering his size and ability.

6. Oh FFS, they’re going back to the Charles Robinson ‘Little Naitch’ period. Fortunately, Becky Lynch is facing mean girl Emma next, which should be good.

7. And it is. Apparently Lynch and Emma have been having a Twitter war, which almost never results in physical violence. Except in WWE, of course. And MMA. And roller derby.

8. More talky talky with the Ambrose Asylum followed by a brawl with Jercho ending in a plant pot shot. Meh.

9. The US title jobber battle royale was your typical rumble style match, with the former League of Nations ending up the last men standing, because someone thinks we actually care about their split. Rusev gets the win, and I find myself struggling to care.

10. After an entirely predictable segment featuring Charlotte, Natalya and Grandpa Ric, it’s time for the main event. Solid performance from everyone involved, with some tension developing between Styles, Anderson and Gallows post match. Of course, because this is Raw, Reigns ends the night looking like a less likable version of Superman.

JT is a hot air balloonist, writer and tattoo aficionado. He writes about movies, science, music, video games, action figures and professional wrestling.