Thought Zero – Let’s get the party started. The WWE has a PPV this weekend, but so what? We have Ring of Honor on TV a week before All-Star Extravaganza.
1) First match is Silas Young versus Toru Yano. Yano threw some water at Young before the bell which understandably pissed off Silas Young. Then Yano tries a roll-up off the opening handshake. Then Yano smacked Young in the back and started running away around the ring. What is this? I think I can definitively state that I do not like Yano’s style.
2) Amazingly, Yano has turned me into a Silas Young fan for at least one day. I’m not sure that is what he was going for. I understand comedy and humor in wrestling, but this act is just too much for me. Steve Corino keeps talking about Yano’s MMA background, but if that is true, I am not seeing it.
3) Side note: Yano’s tights are ridiculous too. However, in the end, Silas Young beats Yano by crashing him into the exposed turnbuckle. Serves him right. However, the Briscoes come out to defend their 6-man partner from a further beatdown at the hands of Silas Young. Party poopers.
4) Christopher Daniels sits in a darkened room where he cuts an impassioned promo about time and his realization that at some point he will fight his last fight. His voice cracks through the promo in a very nice touch. He tells the Young Bucks and the Motor City Machineguns (The Addiction’s opponents at All-Star Extravaganza) to wonder what he will be willing to do to keep his belt. Because he is a lousy husband and father and the only thing that matters to him in his life is that title. Then hegoes on to say that he will be the one to spit in the face of cliches and he will tell time to fuck off. Whoa. Add to this promo the pretty terrifying t-shirt he’s wearing and all I can say is damn. I am impressed. This worked VERY well.
5) Oh Lordie, it’s Cheeseburger. We get to see him wrestle. Joy of joys. He goes against Punishment (?) Damien Martinez tonight. Were they threatened with a lawsuit from Marvel and can’t call him Punisher anymore? Martinez is flanked by BJ Whitmer and Kevin Sullivan. Well, at least they are putting all the suck into one segment. Kevin Sullivan spends the match at the announce table talking to Kevin Kelly and Steve Corino. Now they are going with some story where Sullivan is saying that Corino’s real name is Muzar Mukahn or something. BJ Whitmer comes into the ring and beats down Cheeseburger while Will Ferrara charges to the ring to earn his keep by getting destroyed by Martinez as well.
6) I like Martinez, but they better really pay off this whole Kevin Sullivan-BJ Whitmer-Steve Corino thing and they better do it soon. And make it stick. Otherwise, they are just going to drag Martinez down with them into the Valley of the I-Don’t-Care. Back from commercial break and Steve Corino is holding and pondering the golden spike. And we get more of this shit as we get to hear BJ Whitmer blather for a little while. Ugh ugh ugh.
7) Kevin Kelly runs down the All-Star Extravaganza card. The Ladder Wars match for the tag team title is now more interesting to me after Christopher Daniels’ promo earlier. But this is still a one-match show for me as Jay Lethal versus Naito is the only match sparking my interest. I don’t care about Adam Cole versus Michael Elgin or the six-man match or the four tag team match. Maybe Bobby Fish versus Donovan Dijak could be good. But I am not all-in with this PPV.
8) Kyle O’Reilly is at the announce table for the main event. Why? Well, he hates Adam Cole, so that is probably why. It also probably means he will probably get involved at some point. But Kevin Kelly and Steve Corino warn O’Reilly to stay at the announce table or he could be suspended for a year. O’Reilly says no problem, because he has plans for the next year, plus he got all that rage out already. Um, what? So there isn’t any blood hatred any more? Weird.
9) Main event is Adam Cole and Adam “Hangman” Page versus Hiroshi Tanahashi and Michael Elgin. Steve Corino is acting all strange on the mic to the point where Kevin Kelly is all, “You okay, man?” I guess they are going full-on with this whole Corino thing. Will it ever end? Back to the match – Adam Page is an odd duck. He works very well as a heel, but his offense is mostly fan-friendly. I mean, the shooting star press from the apron to the floor always pops the crowd huge. I wonder why they don’t want to turn him face.
10) Michael Elgin looks like he is wearing a big headband instead of a bandage. Maybe Tanahashi should get a headband too. His mane is looking pretty wild and all in his face lately. The match went pretty much like you would expect with all four men hitting their moves. Elgin and Tanahashi win after Elgin hits Page with a BuckleBomb and Powerbomb combination. Elgin and Cole stare each other down to end the show.
Not the best go home show, but not a bad way to spend an hour. Even better when you can fast forward through the Whitmer-Sullivan-Corino crap. Enjoy All Star Extravaganza and I will see you next week!
Tags: Adam Cole, adam page, b.j. whitmer, Cheeseburger, Christopher Daniels, Hirohi Tanahashi, Kevin Sullivan, Michael Elgin, Punisher Martinez, silas young, Steve Corino, Toru Yano