Hello again. I’m Flea and this report should be available for you by the time you take your first break at work. That is IF you work. If you are still in school, you may have to wait until you get home, unless of course YOUR school has been blessed by Al Gore and has Internet access. If you are unemployed, good for you responsibility sucks.
Before we go any further, be sure to check out 411’s EXCESS report. I’m on a mission, folks. And as promised, the return of everyone’s favorite “something†is at the bottom.
Come on, let’s go
FIRST OFF
NO MERCY
For those of you WITHOUT Direct TV but with enough money to order or one of those little “black box†things you might have seen the following:
Full results are available over in the news section. Also, be on the lookout for a ten thousand-word rant on why the UT and politics suck.
HAVE YOU HEARD?
For both of you that care, Mikey Whipwreck had his “final†match last night. I say “final†because Mikey has been on a retirement kick all year long. Those in the know say this is it, but can we really be sure? Even money says if Paul E. asked Mikey would be on RAW tomorrow. Even if only for the sole purpose of giving a great big sloppy kiss to the Japanese man nice enough to send him flowers. I read all about this over at the usual.
While over there, this also caught my eye. The PRIDE organization wants to do some cross- promotion with a few wrestlers, namely The Rock and Goldberg. Seems like they want to have the Rock just show up and / or announce, which has been shot down due to conflicting interests. Meanwhile, BOB’s favorite wrestler would actually compete. Yeah right. It’s easy to kick someone’s head in when they think the kick is WORKED and not expecting it. It’s a whole different beast when someone knows it’s coming, counters and then rips your f*cking face off. Besides, Goldberg bleeds like a stuck pig just from growling and snarling, much less getting punched. More on this story to come, I’m sure.
Don “Cyrus†Callis has a neat article over at Slam. He jumps aboard the “RVD is careless†bandwagon and speculates it’s damn lucky RVD didn’t bust open The Rock. Not that it matters Vince sees dollar signs all over RVD and will just tell the other wrestlers to put their hand up or duck. Anyway, check out the Jackyl if you get time.
WCW.com has an interview up featuring Tommy Dreamer. Standard Dreamer material focusing on his dedication to the business and his thrill about working MSG for the first time. It’s not like the guy is going to win a belt or anything, but I think it would be great to have Paul E. book him as SOMETHING other than jobber.
ANOTHER WEEK OF THIS CRAP
RAW will be live from Baton Rouge, LA on Monday and Smackdown will be taped in Bob Holly’s hometown Tuesday for Thursday’s viewing pleasure. I’m sure several things will happen due to events occurring on the PPV. What will they be? Hell if I know, it’s to early for WWF.com’s preview.
THE LINKS ARE ON ME
What did the “know it alls†here at 411 think was gonna happen at No Mercy? Take a look and either marvel at their brilliance or realize why they ain’t booking this shit. Except that pot smoking burn out Art. No wonder the dude rhymes. Light a fatty and click here
Aristotle is very over-rated. Where were his practical skills? Like inventing a crowbar to separate the Greek men from the little Greek boys? He did however have a quote that has been quoted (?) It’s included in a column called “The Meanâ€Â. Here is where Ben Morse fills in the details.
Read this column!!!!! I’m on a mission. Here you go!
What did Pat Brower think of Jakked? He ain’t afraid to say. Find out by doing something with your mouse.
And in a personal plug I now refer you to one of my favorite columns on the net. Seeing as it’s a competitor’s site and I ain’t stealing news, I cannot give you the link. But I will tell you this: his name is Harry Simon and he does his thing at ayveday eltzermay’s itesay. Eckchey him out, eh?
PAGE SIX
Well, well ,well. It has certainly been an interesting week here in Internet Land. Who cares about RVD and Austin, much less Angle, when we have Scott Keith vs. CRZ!!. Not to mention Botter and DR vs. Everyone who hated Wrestleline!!! Where will The Rick show up? Who is the mystery guest at Slash? And who, by GAWD, WHO?? is coming to 411?
Until we find out, here is the “return†I mentioned. If some of this looks familiar it because they are YOUR words, not mine. This week, a lot of “material†(HAH!) comes from the same source, just because this shit was so goddamn funny after all that went down last week. Without further ado, here we go
because I’m F.LEA Bailey and I care
BOARD? UM
Has anyone else found this thread to be like watching 75 people in a limp-wristed slapfight?
Somewhere in America . . . a hospital janitor is starting his car in an enclosed garage.
“Downtown”: your columns were the most excrable heaps of smelly doo-doo I’ve ever read. They were strangely attractive in a way, much like the recent classic Skins/Boys MNF matchup… horrible to behold but somehow interesting in their despicableness. You write like a six year old.
I think when it’s all said and done HHH will surpass each every single one of his Clique friends. Quite the accomplishment for the whipping boy.
And YES, I KNOW I probably misspelled “excrable,” but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re a moron.
Yes, of course, Chris is the innocent peace-loving hippie who NEVER takes shots at me, and I’m the evil boogieman.
Holy crap I’M POSTING HERE?
what’s with “we had three things that no other site EVER had: Honest opinions, dedicated workers who were wrestling die-hards, and honest news”. For that I have two words for you “Mark Madden”
HOLY @#%$ @#%$
– The effect was MUCH better without the filter – flea J
I realize that you probably don’t believe in lawyers and all that, but getting your GIRLFRIEND to call Sportsline and demand money for you is just sad. It’s also sad that you demanded over double the amount of the producers yearly salary and then tried to pass it off like you were being cheated out of pennies per submission
and how about 411’s great new layout!
i hope to god we never hear from rick scaia again
go read Scott “90% of the Internet Copies Me” Keith to find out what a real ass is like.
Bill Gates comes to Slash?
Jesus Christ on a bike I cant believe I just posted that.
Yeah….Rick didn’t believe in research, the lazy bastard
You forgot to remind everyone that……… IT’S JUST A FUCKING EZBOARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Scott Keith’s a clown and so is Jeremy Botter. Life is too short to be worrying about clowns.
Yeah what is up with that 911 site? I didn’t even see any content I saw the f*cking ugly as all get out background and I said out loud. YES OUT LOUD TO MYSELF. That’s ugly! I refuse to go to this site!’
If you worship CRZ, you need to shoot yourself, NOW.
Dave Gagnon… Hm. Have him say hi to Betty Ford for me, eh?
I mean seriously, remember Sable? Personally, I thought she looked better before her boobs turned into pumpkins. She became a Barbie doll and it looked like she had trouble walking with those things weighing her down.
It is a shame and you are right! It is also a shame that those who choose to participate in discussions on your “Board” are those with out Brain Matter!
you should let your girlfriend do your talking like CRZ let’s his do his negotiating.
Terri looks like an old woman trying to fit in. Two melons sitting on a wash board. She must give really good head to still have a job.
CRZ is the most zen person I know – he doesn’t let things faze him, and he has no intention of suing for libel at this time . I’m just trying to point out that words carry a consequence, and that it is important to be careful what you say.
Thanks for reading THE MONDAY EDITION, I’m Flea.
