Saturday Evening Post 02.23.02

Hello there! Welcome to the weekend! I’m Flea and I am here for YOU!!! Not much more to say except I WISH MY FUCKING PHONE WOULD QUIT RINGING! It’s been Grand Central Station around here since 8am. Still, as I type ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring. That’s why I hate when it rains – I want to stay in bed and just goof around but everyone else has nothing to do either and wants to chat away. GO AWAY is my thoughts on the whole matter. But Desi won’t let me turn the ringer off, lest it’s someone we just HAVE to talk to The sooner the sun comes back out and I can be back by the pool, the happier I will be. I’m sure you can relate.

Let’s get to it .

TOP STORY

Well, I had planned to make today’s top story an extensive preview of the WWA PPV from Las Vegas tomorrow night, but I can not find ANYTHING that even remotely resembles information regarding this alternative to RAW, Smackdown, Heat, EXCESS, Jakked or Metal. Even Dave (not him, the smart one) only gives the show a couple one liners – even HE ain’t sure what’s up. And that dude knows everything!

Waitwaitwaitwaitwait

I specifically remember some one telling me “If your name ain’t BOB or Dave (yes, that one) you don’t get invited.” That’s not a specific quote so I don’t have to tell you who told me that. Nyah.

So I pop (har) over to BOB’s site and look for what should be an extensive AND behind the scenes look at the debut of the WWA here in America (PPV Event wise). Here’s what I get from the column named after Stan Hansen’s calling card:

I am out here in sunny Las Vegas, the coolest place in the universe. I will be heading to the WWA show tomorrow night at the Aladdin. There is a ton of advertisements here in town for the show, and ads are all over the Aladdin casino. I really didn’t do any digging yesterday as to what will be going on with the show. Hell, I am in Vegas after all! You can check out their website at www.worldwrestlingallstars.com and see what they have planned.

When if that don’t beat all! Hey BOSS! Hire this guy for 411! He mails it in and slacks off just like everyone on this site! ‘Cept me and you of course. And that pothead Art. And Hashish. So I take Dave’s advice and go check out the website no dice. One pager that after reading it I realize I included this in The Monday Edition a couple weeks ago. So here we are full circle as I get my information from MYSELF (from two weeks ago)

Sunday Night Feb. 24th is the WWA PPV and the card looks like this

Also on the card in some for or fashion will be Bret, Big Bad Poppa Daddy, Macho Man and Jeff J-A (HA HA) DOUBLE R (HA HA) E- DOUBLE T.

So there you go who knows what will happen. But I will get the PPV as I am YOUR source for show results. Yes siree, me, Flea will let you know the dilly on the show in The Monday Edition. See, I was contacted to review the show for the site and I will. But I will do it the way I want! I do Monday News and always give a recap of whatever PPV is showing. I just don’t kill myself on the WWF stuff because we already have BOSS’S REAL TIME PPV COVERAGE, not to mention Netcop. But as far as any other PPV, I give you details, details, details. Go back and read the It Ain’t Sumo review from whenever it was ( it’s in the archives at the bottom of the page – and if I recall, I am the ONLY one that gave the thing any attention, not including / even after the annoying pimping of the show). So yes, you will get PPV coverage just don’t expect a separate report or “real time” coverage.

Now that you readers are bored after reading the above paragraph, here’s the deal for you: Come back on Monday for a look at the WWA Pay Per View, Flea style. You will enjoy it and learn what went down, I promise.

So anyway, seeing as I can’t use the WWA as a Top Story, I guess I will talk about the N.w.O again. Good to see that Hogan firmly ensconced himself in Eric S.’s heart 4- life, attempting homicide on Rock-E, with the help of Hall and Nash. The show has gotten trashed by just about everyone I’ve read for the sheer stupidity of the “entertainment” portion of our “sports entertainment” show. Hey, sometimes you gotta take the good with the bad. Hogan / Rock confrontation was a thang of beauty and Hogan’s response to What? (Hogan – “cha gonna do”) came out of nowhere and had me rolling. Hope he plays it up. Cool beatdown followed up the verbal barbs and the ambulance incident. Did they go too far with it? Maybe. Were the comments of the King and JR (serious as a heart attack, et al) overkill? That shit wouldn’t even bother us if Owen hadn’t died. Is it the “stupidest thing the WWF has ever done? Not by a long shot. Hell, it’s ain’t even the most stupid thing Rock has done (“It’s Your Birthday” bullshit ring a bell?) so just I just let it slide. Give Rock the time off and build some suspense going into the Big Showdown.

What I did have a problem with is Smackdown. I watched the show on tape and am glad I did. FASSSSTTTTT FORRRWWWAAARRRD. What a butt-sucker. I recap EXCESS, which is a RECAP show itself, so I don’t need Smackdown to be full of skits and reviews of prior occurrences. But it drew a rating that was a half point better than the week before, so there you go. Personally, I don’t want to go back to 98-99ish WWF, with 25 minutes of wrestling content in a 2 hour show. So please, let’s not do that anymore, okay? (Like they are reading). But if they are .please??? Thanks.

Also, I have to agree with Netcop here and say that the fed is shooting themselves in the foot making Hogan and Nash and Hall look like chumps / buffoons. They should be beating the shit out of anyone and everyone, including Austin. But I did like the Austin / Hall segments just cause I think Austin rules. And how stiff was that right hand he gave Hall? Ouch. I can’t wait till he gets his hands on Bischoff. So even though several things were annoying I’m gonna let them slide and continue sitting back and enjoying until Wrestlemania. Hopefully the N.W.O gets some sweet revenge on RAW. And I want BLOOD dammit!

HEADLINES

Television mogul Barry Diller came out and admitted that he did wrong letting the WWF slip away from the USA Network. He doesn’t like that USA is no longer the dominant cable channel and TNN has seen its ratings surge. Diller’s actual thought when he has to look at himself in the mirror? – “I’m a dope”. But that only seems to be a bone to appease the rabid dog fans of wrasslin. He follows-up by pointing out the fact that the rabid dog wrasslin fans didn’t stick around to watch USA’s other programming and in essence couldn’t care less about them anymore. Umm, Barry that’s because all your other shows SUCK. With the exception of Walker, Tejas Ranger. I mean, how many times can I watch The Terminator? (Well, until my eyeballs fall out, that probably wasn’t the best example) but if you can’t book programming around the wrestling fans demographic the you have no business being who you are. Look at TNN! They give us Baywatch and Star Trek! Wrestling fans = horny nerds. Except me and whoever is reading this report. (YOU!). So all we really get from Mr. Diller is that yes it was nice to be numero uno but no, he wouldn’t shell out the dough-rey-me for syndication rights for shows compatible with the Fed. I just wish TNN would bring back Ralph Emery. He’s not dead, is he?

Also in the news is the Ring of Honor show nevermind. By the time this gets posted the show will be over. I’ll have a review of that manyana.

And speaking of the n.W.o and Austin, looks like Stone Cold and Hall will be doing the house show thing to work out the intricacies of what should be a hell of a match at WMX8. Nash still ain’t fightin nobody but will be in Halls’ corner, committing nefarious acts of heelishness, no doubt. And on March 1st Hogan will wrestle Rikishi over in Tampa. I might go just for the possibility of Hogan getting stinkfaced. Nah, ain’t no way Hogan is going for that unless Rikishi has agreed to be a living trampoline and general play toy for the Hulkster’s children.

And speaking of a man who once compared a check from Paul Heyman to that of the primary action of a trampoline here’s Good Ol JR!

THE ROSS SAYS THIS

In the latest Ross Report, JR makes excuses for the No Way Out PPV. According to him it’s because X-Pac and Justin Credible was not there. (“The X-Factor was not there” – , his words, not mine kiddos.) Right. Even HE couldn’t have saved that sinking ship! JR did put over RAW and mentions that they will be LIVE in Rhode Island this coming Monday. At the Dunkin Donuts Center. HA HA HA HA HA. Dunkin Donuts Center. HA HA HA HA OH HO HOHOHHO!. I feel sorry for anyone who lives in Rhode Island, living or dead.

Speaking of which, someone once mentioned that anyone who does a “random thoughts” column is pretty much a no talent and is just mailing it in .guess what? The rest of Good Ol’s column is a collection of said “random thoughts” and is titled and such. So to hell if I’m gonna report it. Move along to Radio Ga Ga, por favor

RADIO GA GA

Many of today’s wrestlers choose to express their opinions and gripes on various radio programs, be it the standard AM/FM stations or the up and coming Internet talk shows. Here is a run down on who said what

Once again WWF.com has the best interviews as they not only give us Nash this week, but SCOTT HALL! And man, is it a good one. Go check it out. Speaking of Hall, I have the column concerning Razor that I mentioned last week done but not published. I realized that I need the WMX8 scenario to play out as a coda to my points of view. So look for that in a couple weeks. But definitely point and click over to the above mentioned website and see Hall play y’all like a fiddle.

Goldust was on Byte This. Feel E.C’s ubiquity when he posts his report.

Jeremy Borash was interviewed re: the WWA PPV and man is it funny to watch people kiss his ass now that he is in charge of shit. Not as funny as the Dunkin Donuts Center in R.I.. but funny nonetheless. I’ll give him credit; he’s busting his ass to pull this off and I like what he’s trying to do. Not sure about his decision to include Madden, but he’s the boss.

ROLL THE DICE

Check this tidbit out –

Eric Bischoff and Mark Burnett, the famed producer of Survivor, are teaming up to debut a reality based television show that will involve competition to determine the “toughest man in the world”.

Seems Uncle Eric is gonna use his BattleArts stuff to bring us a Survivor type kung-fu show. I don’t care if it’s rigged or not, I’m a fan of WRESTLING, for christsakes. And I like kung fu shows, so count me in as a viewer when and if it happens. Wouldn’t it be cool as shit if Eric booked himself to win? He does the martial arts thing, you know. Or maybe The Cat. Just think if Bisch programs it OPPOSITE the WWF and kicks their ass all over again. That is until Vince and JR start giving away the results to Eric’s taped programming. Oh, the irony!

IN OTHER WORDS

Now available on 411

Nason / Cole / E.C. / Blake Norton

By the way, there will not be an EXCESS report this weekend. It’s only Scotty 2 Hotty and Albert anyway. I think it’s safe to skip, don’t you?

PAGE SIX

And that be dat. As I mentioned I had planned to post the Scott Hall dissertation on Thursday but decided to hold off. Whether or not he f*cks up again before Wrestlemania weighs heavily on the theme of the report so why rush things? I think you will enjoy it.

Speaking of which, Grut plans to add my thoughts to his Steve Corino Wrestling Tale, if he ever actually does it. See, Grut mailed me his interview with Corino and was going to do a goofy “Me and Steve” thing for his news report. I thought it was way too good to waste and should be made into a separate column. I also related a story about when I met Corino at the 50th Anniversary NWA show in New Jersey. It’s a good little tidbit that shows Corino in a good light and is part of the reason the guy has my utmost respect. Apparently, Grut relayed my story to Corino, who said he had no recollection of it. I’m not shocked, it was 5 minutes from four years ago. For some reason Grut thinks that Steve-o’s denial somehow affects the entire theme of his story. It shouldn’t. But take that into account when you read it, if it ever sees the light of day. I probably just should have kept my mouth shut and let him use it in his News Report.

As far as tomorrow, you get an all inclusive recap / review (I can never tell which is what) of the WWA PPV and an EXCLUSIVE –

Let me repeat EXCLUSIVE interview with someone well I keep it surprise. And by golly, does it set a new standard for pretentiousness. Good GOD! Come back and enjoy!

This has been Saturday Evening Post and I’m Flea.