Ask 411 03.10.03 – No Connecting Thread Edition!


Ask 411 03.10.03

– Your soundtrack for this Q&A session is the Daredevil soundtrack and Avril Lavigne’s “Let Go”. Okay, so we all have our guilty pleasures.

– The reviews keep pouring in for the book. We’ve got one from Jason Rivera, who’s also offering a contest for the WWE Divas DVD in addition to the review: Next up, Raw Feed Online has one here: And of course, once your appetite for the book has been wetted, you can pick up
Tonight in This Very Ring
at or a bookseller near you. Announcement on the new book coming soon, I promise.

On with the show…

Just rewatched the Rumble 2000, Cactus Jack vs. HHH. I noticed that when the Barbed Wire Bat that gets used is hidden from Mick under the Spanish Anounce table the wire is coming off but when Mick retrieves the bat it’s good as new. Where there two bats? Why? My only explanation is that the first one wasn’t gimmicked as it was used mostly on a T-shirt wearing Foley and would look impressive tearing up the shirt (even though it didn’t), and the second one was gimmicked seeing as how it was used mainly on HHH’s forehead, where a bladejob could provide ample blood to give the wire tearing illusion.

Bingo. There was two bats, one with plastic barbed-wire and one with real barbed-wire (albeit filed down). Mick took the real one, HHH took the fake one and augmented the damage by blading. I think Mick actually covered that topic in the second book.

How was Hercules turned face for that Survivor Series Match thought he
always wrestled as a heel?

That was the exceedingly classy angle where Ted Dibiase bought Hercules from Bobby Heenan to be his slave. Herc took that suggestion badly, turned on Dibiase, and became the “third Megapower” in a lame attempt to get him over as a big star.

“why does Steiner seem a completely different person in the way he wrestles to 1990?”

Because in early 1991, steroid overuse wrecked the ligaments in his arm and tore the muscle off the bone, ala HHH in 2001. He had to have major corrective surgery done to repair the damage, and was never the same wrestler again from then on.

“So Booker goes over the Rock (kinda) and is apparently on his way to Wrestlemania to go for the belt. Isn’t this a good thing? Or do you just see no real hope of them doing anything with Booker?”

I’d say if someone had to be sacrificed due to the Angle injury, it’ll probably be Booker. After HHH’s total burial of him on the last RAW, I hold out little hope for him going anywhere soon.

“My favorite match of all time is HHH-Cactus Jack from RR 2000. Foley and Trip talk about the buildup to this match as being the “perfect angle” because of the Cactus Jack “legend.” The angle made it seem as if Foley had not wrestled in the WWF as the Cactus Jack character prior to the 2000 Rumble. However, I seem to recall reading that Foley did wrestle around ’97 as Cactus Jack in WWF… even wrestling Trip at one point. Correct me if I’m wrong on this one, as it would seem to dillute the buildup to their supposed “first time encounter” (with Mick as CJ) in 2000. Did WWF even refer to their prior feud at the time?”

Nope, which was kinda funny, actually. That whole period in 1997 pretty much got erased in the buildup, although to be fair it was never portrayed as their first meeting or anything. It was more of a lie by omission than anything.

“your column kicks ass i was just wandering if back when hogan was making all those movies in the late 80’s early 90’s was there anytalk of hogan retiering from wrestling such as there of the rock retiring and has hogan ever taken as much time off as the rock has in the past 2 years”

Hogan talked about retiring from wrestling all the time, but like all wrestlers it was about as meaningful as Terry Funk’s numerous retirements. His match with Sid at Wrestlemania VIII, for example, was supposed to be his retirement from wrestling.

In a related note, Sid has announced HIS retirement due to the leg injury that wouldn’t heal. Tenacious Z, however, has given him precedent to return if need be.

“When Shawn Michaels returned to the ring this summer, wasn’t it only supposed to be for a couple of months? The reports all said Shawn’s back was seriously f***ed up and he was eating pain killers like Life Savers just to get in the ring. Six months later and HBK is still here and will probably go 15-20 minutes with Jericho at ‘Mania. Why is this supposedly crippled part-timer still in the main event scene? Is he magically healed?”

No, but you’ll notice he’s only worked like 3 matches since his miraculous return, and the only that’s been any good is the original Summerslam match with HHH.

And if he goes 15-20 with Jericho, I’ll be SHOCKED.

“Hey Scott. Just had a thought, I read somewhere that WWE was going to bring in OVW’s Nick Dinsmore & Rob Conway as a tag team (weather or not they keep the kick ass name of Lords of the Ring is a different matter) but I was wondering what you would think of the idea of bring Jimmy Coronette (sp?) to be their agent? He probably wouldn’t want to do it, or forces inside WWE wouldn’t want to see it, but I think doing a MX riff would be great. It seems like the WWE is going for the nostalgia pop any way here of late, and there are a few of us who remember Corny. Waddya think? Would it even be possible?”

Yeah, and they should team up Bart Gunn and Bob Holly and call them the New Midnight Express and have Cornette manage! They’d make MILLIONS!


Anyway, they already TRIED a new Midnight Express in 1997, and it was a complete and total failure because no one cares about the Express anymore. The past is the past, let it stay there, trust me.

“The book is off the heezy fo sheezy….anyways I was reading the 97 Bash at the Beach rant and on the Savage/Hall vs. DDP/Henning match you go “this is one of those matches, five years later you’re going to look at the lineup and say why were Hall and Savage teaming and why is Henning the mystery partner.” Well a little more than five years later, here we are, why the hell were they teaming? Do you think that WCW’s oversaturation of name talents (Hogan, Savage, Hall, Nash, Sting, Luger, etc) is their own undoing? Don’t you think that they would have been better off with all these million-dollar money-making, one match-a-month wrestling names around?”

Assuming that “heezy fo sheezy” is something that I’d want the book to be, thanks.

Anyway, there wasn’t actually any particular reason why they were teaming up — WCW was just unable to use Hennig for months after signing him in 1996 due to a no-compete clause, and wanted to debut him as a mystery partner for the pop.

And their undoing was getting cancelled off TNT & TBS — the million-dollar salaries were a drop in the bucket compared to ad revenues. The egos due to some people getting more money than others was far more of a problem than the financial difficulties from having those big contracts on the books.

“After seeing you mention Bill Hicks in a previous feedbag and having read your dvd review of Robin Williams, I was wondering who are your all-time favorite (top 5 list?) stand-up comedians?”

1. George Carlin
2. Jerry Seinfeld
3. Bill Hicks
4. Mike MacDonald (who most Americans have likely never heard of)
5. George W. Bush

“I’m only on Act One so far but I already have one question, which maybe awnsered as time goes on. The casket match between UT and Yoko got a -****, so my question is has a match ever “gone the distance” and received a earth-destroying -*****?”

New Jack v. Mustafa at one of the ECW PPVs, and the horrific Jake Roberts & Yokozuna v. Jim Neidhart & King Kong Bundy trainwreck from Heroes of Wrestling are the only glorious winners of that honor to date.

“Also, you mentioned it in your book a lot, why do Canada fans hate Ken Shamrock?”

Because he was programmed against Bret Hart in 1997, Owen Hart in 1998, and then the Rock in 1998 when Rock was getting over as a babyface. He just happened to be facing favorites in Canada, on Canadian shows, in front of hostile crowds who didn’t buy into the hype for him.

“Quick question on Jake Roberts. After turning heel in late ’91 by burying the Ultimate Warrior alive (if only), Jake was one, if not the, most entertaining heel around. He had a great feud with Randy Savage, then turned Undertaker face in ’92, but he disappeared after their Wrestlemania blowoff match. Why’d he leave when his heel run was just getting into high gear? He could’ve easily been Macho’s first contender after Savage won the world title from Flair.”

Because Jake got a bigger money offer from WCW and he was in the midst of self-destructing and would have been fired soon after anyway.

“i have a question which is probably easy answered. I used to love survivor series and it used to be my favourite PPV of the year.
Why has wwe stopped doing the 3 and 4 man tag matches that made the survivor series what it is. it was such a change for all the heels and faces to make corny named teams and fight each other.”

They stopped because the concept was no longer as marketable as doing singles matches. Previously the show had been sold on being a WWF show and people bought it to the see the elimination matches, but with business down they couldn’t afford to keep doing the gimmick show. Besides, most of the matches were inherantly bad due to the rushed nature of the shows anyway.

“Hey Scott, I read your feedbag last week and realized a small error you might like to know. You stated that you think the Undertaker rides his motorcycle from town to town. The Truth is that WWE contacts a motorcycle store in every town they go to have one delivered for the show. I knew this because a buddy of mine used to work at Cycle World and he had the opportunity to deliver the bike and hang out backstage one night. But yet I do have a question? I was wondering if you know what happened to MECW. It was suppossed to be a big deal about a year back or so but then seemed to fall off of a cliff, Never to be heard about again.”

Duly noted about Undertaker.

As for MECW, it turned out to be a scam from the money marks, who got their cut of the gate and then stiffed all the workers. In other words, just like a million other failed indy promotions.

“I have a question for you. Last year in the Royal Rumble Curt Hennig was
one of the last 3 participants remaining, which seemed really odd to me at
the time being he had just returned from what was then I guess you could
call a rival promotion (XWF) and was their champion, which led me to expect
him to get the B2 treatment and get tossed 5 seconds in, in order to bury
said promotion..but instead he was one of the last 3 remaining. Do you
have any info on why they left him in there that long? And why if they had
him as one of the final 3 participants they didnt have anything planned for
him after that as far as a storyline or push goes?”

They left him in that long to humiliate the XWF, plain and simple. They were going to push him, but he just didn’t have anything left in the ring and plans were dropped soon after until his continued self-destruction left him fired after the Plane Ride From Hell.

” I just wanted to get your thoughts on HHH/Booker T at Wrestlemania. What do you think is gonna go down? Do you think that HHH will atleast put Booker T over as a legimate challenge or just squash him? Or do you think that they actually might put the belt on Booker, because god knows they have to legitmize this RAW World Championship more to make it seem more pursued and saught after. Oh and I remember reading something that said they don’t think that it would work because of his 5 time Champion gimmick, but he is a 5 time WCW Champion not a 5 time RAW Champion, same belt not same championship. If they really wanted to they could still use the looking at the hand thing then just before he leaves he throws up the other hand with 1 finger up to show that he is a 1 time RAW Champ and that he is #1 and just keep adding more fingers the more times he is champ. But that’s just my take, what do you think?”

If HHH doesn’t maneuver himself into the Austin-Rock match first, I think Booker will eat a Pedigree and end up on the midcard scrap heap along with anyone else who has dared to get over on Hunter’s show.

Either that, or HHH will continue to bury Booker until he’s no longer a threat, do a meaningless job to him with tons of interference, and then claim that he’s not over enough to keep the title and thus get it back at the first RAW PPV (because you have to have a title change to make it special, you know).

“hey scott, i love the book! i have a question for the feedbag. why did the steiners leave the wwf in early 1994 when they were in a hot fued and most likely would’ve got the tag belts back at wrestlemania x?? also, what was behind their brief return that april?? they were on an episode of raw and then scott lost to i.r.s. in a king of the ring match. were they just finishing up their contracts? or were they close to a new deal? BUY THE BOOK!!!!”

I like that spirit!

Yeah, it was just money and creative issues. They wanted more, but Vince wanted Scott to ditch Rick and accept a huge singles push. Scott refused to break up the team and they just kind of worked out their contract and left without fanfare in 1994, opting for the bigger money and easier schedule that Japan offered. Same thing happened two years before when Bill Watts wanted to push Scott as a single in 1992 and they chose to leave for the bigger money WWF deal instead.

“Scott I have a big question that I have been thinking
about. If the wrestlers hate HHH so much for kissing
ass and keeping his spot when he is half crippled, why
dont they instead of just bitching about it to the
dirt sheats DO SOMETHING??? I mean say Jerico started
to kiss the ass like Hunter does do you think he could
become a star? Or what about Test? (Size check, Hair
check) I know Vince has given both of these guys big
pushes in the past only to pull them because of lost
confodience, but what if someone in the locker room
started to become a NEW HHH and took the sucking up to
a whole level? I mean if someone was holding me back I
wouldnt just tell a fat guy in his 40’s so that a few
thousand people can see it I would take action and
make a move. Thanks.”

The wrestlers don’t generally hate HHH — he’s not an obnoxious elitist like Hogan or anything, he just manipulates things to his own end.

And besides, as long as Hunter is with Chyna Jr., there’s nothing gonna knock him off that perch.

“Can you provide a summary of the rise and fall (and rise) of blading in
the 80s and 90s? I can remember when everyone bladed, then no one bladed,
then blading was vogue again. For crying out loud, JR bladed on RAW a few
weeks ago. What caused these trends?”

Dusty Rhodes booking in the 80s was the major source of blood in the NWA. Vince just wanted to be contrary, so he booked mostly bloodless, and in fact even sent a letter to TBS protesting the “barbaric” practice of blading and demanding that it stop. The AIDS scare of the 90s sent blading into the closet again for a long while, until ECW brought it back with a vengeance. From there, it was done mainly by main event guys for drama in the finishes, with WCW and WWF alternating their stance on whether or not to do it depending on which side was getting better ratings from it. The low point was undoubtedly in 1996 when Nitro would have color in every Hogan match, usually due to a woman’s shoe. When the WWF went “Attitude” in 1998, it returned strong again, specifically once Mick Foley and HHH got higher in the card. First Blood matches became en vogue under Vince Russo and thus it became more common. They try to keep it to important matches these days (like Brock-UT’s Hell in a Cell), but policy has become fairly lax.

“What advances in blading technology/technique make it possible for
modern wrestlers to live without the scar tissue visible on 70s and 80s
wrestlers? Decent medical treatment? Pastic surgery?”

How about not doing it every night, like Dusty used to?

And if you ever saw a closeup of HHH’s forehead, you wouldn’t say that he’s living without scar tissue. Generally better lighting and camera work disguise the blade marks, but as guys get older, the skin stops healing as fast and you’ll notice.

“hey, why did vince bring in ecw guys for those shows in 97? Didn’t he even give Heyman some money to help him out? I mean he probably didn’t try to build up ECW so he could have some competition because WCW was already becoming more competition than vince could handle. so did he use taz and those guys because at the time the midcard in wwf was a complete joke and he was trying to steal ECW’s talent or was it something else? I’m sure it’s not because Vince is just a nice guy who enjoys helping people.”

Vince was indeed making secret payments to ECW in the 90s, and to this day I don’t think anyone knows 100% sure why. He used the ECW guys in 1997 for the one show because everyone was on tour overseas and they were desperate for talent to fill up their newly two-hour show (RAW was only an hour until 1997), and the resulting “feud” was more for ECW’s benefit than the WWF’s. Maybe he was just being a nice guy in the end, but we’ll never know.

“Ok i got a question. I cant remember the year, but i remember the Fed giving Ken Shamrock a push. Basically he beat both Bret Hart and Shawn Micheals when they had the title, but the ref was out cold. Why didnt the push go any farther, and why did he eventually leave the Fed.”

The push didn’t go further because he was a complete flop in the main event, and he left because he wanted to go back into Ultimate Fighting again.

“Also, how are you getting the feeds for SmackDown! every week an hour (sometimes more) before the show is ended?”

As part of a secret Canadian plan to infiltrate the US and steal government secrets, we have built a time machine, housed in central Saskatchewan and disguised as a rabid cow, and have been testing it by watching WWE TV from an hour into the future every week. We were also going to use it to get all the winning Powerball numbers for next week, but future George Bush speeches keep pre-empting the lottery broadcasts.

Or else you could believe the cover story about the WWE buying an interest in the Score sports network and wanting Canadian fans to watch Smackdown there instead of on US feeds of UPN at the same time, but that sounds pretty far-fetched to me.

“How did “What?” get introduced as a catchphrase? I didn’t watch wrestling for a while in 2001, and when I came back, “What?” was Austin’s biggest catchphrase and a crowd favorite right up with chanting “You Suck” to Kurt Angle, which brings me to ask how that came together. “

Austin was calling Christian’s cell phone and when he got voice mail, he decided to annoy him by filling up the allotted time with a one-way conversation with himself. One of the writers heard the message and thought it was so funny that he asked Austin to start doing it in his interviews, and it spread like cancer from there.

“Hello Scott, loved the book, amazing read, read it in two days I was so hooked on it. My question relates to the use of the Big Show. Do you believe that he could of been a major player for the company had they pushed him correctly upon his debut in 1999? I always have believed that he would have been an immediate challenger to Austin’s newly won WWF title and would have provided at least two ppv matches (Backlash and the then Over the Edge) and would have given Austin a new, fresher opponnent as oppossed to facing Undertaker again. I understand that politics held him back and such but had that not been in the way, I think that he could of been a big player at least for that short term period had he been played as a major threat to Austin. Your thoughts please. “

Show was a catch-22 situation, because they paid HUGE money for him in order to get him away from WCW, but then had to use him every week in order to justify that money. However, overexposure burned him out within months and he lost all his motivation and gained another million pounds. If he had been used only on PPVs and special occasions and had stayed under 400 pounds, he would have been a major star with his funny personality and relative athleticism.

“Hey now! UnderAdapter has proven incredibly adaptable. First he went from gray mortician’s gloves to purple mortician’s gloves (mostly to allow the confused masses distinguish between Dibiase’s FakerTaker and the GenuineTaker). He also changed his sacred urn, from which he DREW POWER, into an amulet after Kama, the Ultimate Fighting Voodoo Pimp melted it down into a gold Flava Flave clock. Then he just got exhausted by the huge burden of having to do the Dead Man voice and eye roll every week and became the UnderRedneck the undead NASCAR crew chief, and let’s not forget his dalliance with an alternative lifestyle as he became a GimperTaker in leather as the head of the Corpistration of Darkness. Also he made the HUGE change from throwing uppercut “thrusts” to the throat to overhand right crosses (though UnderChanger’s innovation failed him this time as the thrusts were way cooler). And even after all these momentous character changes and continued evolution to his working style he obviously was inspired by a UFC (Undertaker Fisticuff Club?) PPV and decided to add a deadly, if casually applied triangle choke as a finisher now that he is too weak or bored to even lift up a actively jumping TBS for the split second needed for a chokeslam. In short, never forget that Undertaker has modified a good portion of his wardrobe and about 1/18th of his ring repertoire over 13 years. I figure we have only got 10 more years left of the Big Evil Devil Biker until another magnificent Undermakeover is gifted to us lucky fans.”

Once again, I stand corrected.

“Got a tirade of Goldberg questions for you Scott,

By the time of his first acknowledged loss, Goldberg allegedly had a win streak of 174-0. Now it’s quite obvious that this was just a hugely bloated number, and that most of his wins were against C Level Jobbers, but at what point did WCW just start going with it and bloat the win streak up so high? What was his actual number of wins? Also, once he finally did win the title from Hogan, why did they still continue to have him defend it in the main event of Nitro in six second squash matches against guys like Meng? Finally, what was the story about his loss to Hector Guerrero? One last thing, were his chants really piped through the PA System?”

Not a TIRADE of questions! I can handle a bevy or even a multitude, but a tirade is asking too much!

Okay, let’s do this scientifically.

First of all, the winning streak got completely out of hand once he won the US title from Raven. By that point Mike Tenay just started making up numbers and adding them on and that’s where it got silly.

Second, his actual total, figured three shows a week for 52 weeks, would have been fairly close to that number, but more likely around 130 or so figuring lots of days off. 174 is certainly possible, but it’s not like anyone was actually keeping track.

Third, he was kept out of the main event because Hogan and Nash didn’t want him to get over as the next big thing. Thus, he didn’t get a chance to.

Fourth, his loss to Hector never happened, they just made that whole match up for reasons that still elude me to this day.

Finally, yes, the chants were really piped in via the PA for a long time. By the time he won the title, however, they weren’t.

“First things first–HELL OF A BOOK!

Now on to business, do you see any scenario where Vince would consolidate the WWE in to one entity again or at least make a single Unified World Champion again?”

If UPN cancelled Smackdown, maybe, but otherwise absolutely not.

“Writing to ask if you heard JR and King making out that the reason the Toronto crowd was booing Steiner on RAW was because he had a USA flag on his tights. I’m not saying that’s a not a good reason, but, hey, seeing as WHOLE ARENAS are booing this guy LOUDLY because he’s shit, why do they need to explain in such a ridiculous manner? Clearly 80% of the fanbase thinks he’s a boring waste of time, so who are they trying to kid, exactly? Steiner’s Mum?”

Hey, maybe Steiner has a REALLY big family, who knows?

JR tends to get pissy about fans booing the wrong guys a lot. It’s just his defense mechanism whenever someone doesn’t automatically cheer a By Gawd Hoss to blame the fans.

“In early ’87 when Windham was having classics with
Flair nightly, why didn’t the title belt switch hands
at any point? Considering Windham was one of Dusty’s
boys from Florida in the early 80’s and; at least
outwardly, Flair was willing to do business with
Windham, why not a title run?”

Flair-Windham didn’t exactly set the house show world on fire, although whether that was due to business as a whole being down or Windham not being a draw, you can’t really say. Either way, Windham was never a guy in line for the belt, and I don’t think he wanted it at that point anyway.

“Could you elaborate upon the circumstances of the Hart
title win over Flair? You had mentioned Vince wanted
to prevent political coups from screwing things up
later. What exactly did Vince fear and how did Hart
and Flair fit into that equation?”

He feared guys like Ultimate Warrior or Randy Savage going behind his back and complaining to the other agents that THEY should get the title because Bret wasn’t big enough, over enough, couldn’t work WWF style, whatever. It was just the usual “guys on top don’t want to give up their spot” bullshit, nothing more.

“Was it really necessary for Vince McMahon to pay Bret 20 million for 20 years to stay with the WWF back in 97? In Bret’s documentry, Wrestling With Shadows, Bret acted as if he really wanted to stay with the WWF, even when Vince admitted that he couldn’t afford Bret. Would Bret have seriously considered joining WCW if Vince hadn’t made such a big offer?”

Yes, Bret seriously considered jumping, on more than one occasion as a matter of fact. His World title run in 1992 kept him from jumping ship, to name one.

Vince’s goal was just to make such an insanely long-term offer that even WCW couldn’t match it — I think Bret would have stayed for less money, but the offer of booking and respect was what kept him around. Of course, we know now that Vince had absolutely no plans to honor that contract, but hindsight is 20/20.

“Before ECW got on PPV they had shows like Three-Way
Dance, November to Remember and so on… Were those
shows syndicated? They appear to be 2-hour shows which
seems long for syndication… I was wondering how
exactly those shows were packaged/broadcast..”

They were put onto videotape and distributed exclusively through Rob Feinstein’s RF Video. And bootlegged extensively, I should add.

“A few years ago (1999?), Raw was pre-empted in the
U.S. (presumably for the US open) and TSN broadcast a
Canada-only version of Raw. It was basically a house
show with Shane and Cornette hosting (I think…). Do
you know what date that was and have you ever done a
rant for it? Do you know where I could find a match

I have indeed done a rant for it, my one and only RAW rant for Wrestlemaniacs back in 1999. Unfortunately they never archived their stuff, the Wayback Machine doesn’t archive anything between Dec. 98 and Feb. 19 /99 for god knows what reason, and my own personal archives were destroyed by the Chernobyl virus in 1999, leaving me without a copy of the rant for myself anywhere that I can find.

HOWEVER, I just checked Deja, and apparently I posted it to RSPW.M, so here for your viewing pleasure for the first time in more than 4 years, the LOST RAW rant…

The Netcop RAW Rant for Feb. 9/ 99.

– As a matter of consideration, I’ll be recapping the 90 minute pre-game
show to provide spoiler space for those in the US who don’t want to know
the results. Not that it spoils anything that’s the LEAST bit interesting,
because this show sucked the meat missile.

– First show: Gallagher.

– Featured guests are Sable, Debra and Chyna. Debra is having a really
lousy day, apparently. Chyna gets major heel heat. Debra is such a
ditzy redneck. Sable runs a close second. Debra confirms that she is
NOT married to Mongo anymore. Chyna tries to trick John Gallagher into
taking the LOWBLOW OF DOOM. Doesn’t work. Chyna notes that she has no
interest in the Women’s title and it would only take two seconds to win
the title anyway. Sable and Chyna proceed to sit and take potshots at
each other over breast augmentations. Nasty stuff. On posing for
Playboy: Debra is THERE if the money is right, Chyna isn’t comfortable
with herself yet. Nothing else to report here.

– Second show: Off The Record with Mick Foley.

– Foley’s direction in life came from watching wrestling and wanting to
make “classic moments” rather than “classic matches”.

– He recounts the hitchhiking to see Jimmy Snuka story.

– Wrestlers who maintain kayfabe in mainstream interviews bug him.

– Thinks that Mankind appeals to people who want to be Steve Austin but
don’t have the self-esteem.

– Thanks that Vince is hardcore because he takes chairshots, but he
doesn’t have to take them.

– His kids color in Mr. Socko for him.

– Mick does NOT like wearing the belt. That is, he likes being the
champion, but he refuses to actually wear the belt.

– They go over Hell in a Cell, covering the Big Fall, the chokeslam, the
teeth, and the injuries the resulted. He took one day off.

– They discuss Mick’s incessant need to kill himself for our pleasure.

– Mick warns kids to use some common sense before they get into
wrestling. Get a degree first, and then start your career.

– He was working on a backdrop where he’d land on his HEAD, but he
couldn’t find a way not to end up paralyzed. Well, duh.

– Mick brings up the Man of the Year poll thing.

– We finish with some word association. On Paul E. : He’s a genius, but
he looks terrible for 33.

– Second show: Off The Record with The Rock.

– Rock discusses his family roots and the fact that he’s the first WWF
champion “of color” as he puts it.

– Rock defines “jabronie” for Landsberg.

– Rock writes his own “Rockisms”.

– They talk about the Survivor Series finish and how it was based on the
finish from the year before.

– They go over the Rockisms and where they came from. Nothing exciting.

– More talk about Rock’s start in the sport.

– Austin is Rock’s best opponent.

– Rock confirms that Giant is coming in, Severn is gone, and the Blue
Blazer was indeed Koko B. Ware. They finish by discussing Ahmed
Johnson’s personal issues. Nothing much exciting on the show, but it’s
a great hype job for THE BIGGEST RAW EVER!

And now, without further adieu, the BIGGEST RAW EVER!

– Live from Skydome, in Toronto, Ontario.

– Your hosts are Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler.

– Big-ass recap of Austin-McMahon starts us off.

– That is like the biggest damn crowd I’ve ever seen.

– An Austin interview kicks us off, and the crowd isn’t really into it.
Hey, it’s Canada, just wait until the Rock comes out. Austin goes
through the usual and Mankind comes out to rebutt. Vince and the
Corporation join the party, and Vince guarantees that no one from the
Corporation will interfere. I think we all know who that leaves.

– Opening match: D-Lo Brown v. Jeff Jarrett. D-Lo brings out “Ivory”,
a woman who’ll do anything for Mark. Match lasts all of a minute before
JJ gets the figure-four, and Ivory distracts him enough to allow D-Lo to
get the Skyhigh for the fast pin. Well, that was…something. Sign in
crowd: “CRZ is God”. Don’t give him any ideas. Ivory and Debra get
into a pseudo-catfight, which is quickly broken up.

– Val Venis and Ryan Shamrock are out for an interview, but Shamrock
runs in and beats the shit out of Venis and just about every referee in
the building. Note to Ryan: Girls go under the MIDDLE rope when they

– Goldust v. Gillberg. The spear does nothing. Goldust reels off a
couple of moves…and then Bluedust appears on the video wall…naked.
Ewwwwwwwwww. But this is enough to distract Goldust…and Gillberg gets
the pin! Goldust is first! The lights go out…and Goldust gets a

– Earl Hebner makes the statement that no refs will work the Shamrock
match on Sunday, and if no one step forward Shammy forfeits the title.

– D-X (including Road Dogg, who looks fine) comes out for a gab session.
HHH makes some genitallia remarks about Chyna. Jammes does the intro,
which is really LOUD. Billy Gunn reveals a referee’s shirt, thus tying
up that referee thing from earlier, so he’ll be the ref on Sunday for
the I-C title. Very loud “Suck it”.

– Mankind v. Steve Austin. Vince is the ref. He goes over the rules:
Anything is legal and will be encouraged. Kicks to the groin will be
appreciated. Austin and Foley aren’t down with this plan, so Vince ends
up eating the Mandible Sock. A big brawl erupts with the Corporation
getting cleared out by the faces. What is this shit? This isn’t Nitro,
Vince, deliver your damn matches. This show is sucking.

– After the break, Vince is back. Vince announces that Austin will have
to run the Gauntlet against the Corporation.

– The Godfather (w/ Hos) v. Viscera. Someone sent me a really good joke
about Viscera, but he doesn’t deserve it. Midion does commentary and
goes all weird on us. Viscera lumbers around for a while and then
Midion runs in for the DQ. They destroy Godfather. The crowd doesn’t
care. What the HELL is that thing in Midion’s jar? An eye? And
where’s the Canadian talent tonight? Who the hell wants to see these

– Backstage, Shamrock and Venis are fighting, so Bill Gunn breaks it up
and beats up Venis himself.

– X-Pac v. Kane. This is non-title. Kane just hammers X-Pac, tossing
him around like a child. Wow, what a beating. X-pac knocks Kane off

the apron and takes over with some kicks, but Chyna breaks things up for
the DQ. She wallops on X-Pac for a bit and goes for a pedigree, but HHH
makes the save. Best of the night so far, but that’s not saying much.

– Al Snow (with a bunch of toys to play with) challenges anyone in the
arena to a hardcore match tonight, but no one answers. So he proceeds
to, well, beat himself up. Bob Holly comes out to talk some sense into
him, and Snow decks him. So they proceed to do a “hardcore” match that
really sucks. I mean, it’s just brutal, and not in the good way. Crowd
is gone. Where are the Canadians? Where’s Edge? Where’s Test?
Where’s Owen? Would an actual match have killed them?

– Droz punks Kevin Kelly for calling him a punk on Heat. Kelly took a
couple of good shots.

– Steve Blackman v. The Rock. Yeah, this is really appropriate for the
BIGGEST RAW EVER. Rock gets the best pop of the night. Crowd chants
“Rocky” at various points. Rock Bottom and Corporate Elbow gets the
pin. Rocky is way over in Canada.

– Ken Shamrock v. Steve Austin. This is match #1 of the gauntlet for
Austin. We go back and forth and Austin hits the Stunner, but Test runs
in for the DQ, setting up…

– Test v. Steve Austin. Austin hits the Stunner quickly, but Kane
breaks it up for the DQ, giving us…

– Kane v. Steve Austin. Kane wipes out Austin and chokeslams him, but
it only gets two and Austin gets the Stunner, leading to Chyna breaking
it up for the DQ and we get…

– Chyna v. Steve Austin. Stunner, DQ. Bossman runs in…

– Big Bossman v. Steve Austin. Gee, think this’ll be a DQ too? Bossman
gets the nightstick and chokes out Austin for the DQ, and Vince comes in
to finish it.

– Vince McMahon v. Steve Austin. After Bossman finishes brutalizing
Austin with the nightstick, Vince pins him. What? The Corporation
holds Austin down while Vince blathers something about “Never being the
same” after Sunday.

The Bottom Line: What a brutal show. Horrible ending. Bad matches.
No atmosphere. Sure, in the States it’s just a tossed off setup show
for the PPV on Sunday, but after all the months of hyping it up here I’m
pretty pissed off that this is what we got. This is the WWF Attitude?
“Get it?”

More like “Forget It.”

See you on Thursday for my regular Thunder report.

So there ya go.

And on that note, we close up the Ask411 mailbag for another indeterminate amount of time!