Hello There! I’m Flea and I know for a fact that Lee Harvey Oswald acted
alone when he killed JFK. Who you going to believe – Me or that hack Oliver
Stone? I always knew that his bullshit would be taught as history instead of
really good FILMS, but it still saddens me to think that the people believe
the 80’s were all about Greed, Bad Things happened in Vietnam, Juliette Lewis
is hot by any stretch of the imagination, Nixon was a paranoid drunk, and
Lyndon Johnson killed John Kennedy. What’s wrong with this Guy? Someone needs
to do something about this…but it ain’t me. One thing I do know is The Right
Thing, which I learned from Spike Lee. And the Right Thing, in essence, is
minding your own damn business. People normally get what they deserve.
Besides, I have Flair to watch…which happens to be our theme today!
Let’s Get to It…
TOP STORY
I think, if they didn’t know
before, that Vince and the Gang finally realize the extent of what they own
and how starved the fans are for "Classic Matches" and Angles of
Days Gone By. The only problem is that all of the archives that are NOT WWF /
WWE (regardless of if it’s Flair) really prove that for wrestling fans, NWA
/ WCW, up until about 1991, pretty much put to shame anything that WWF could
ever do, wrestling / angle – wise speaking. Of course, I’m jaded – THIS is
the wrestling that I grew up on and loved, not the cartoon antics and big,
lame stiffs that Vince shoved down our throats until HBK, Bret and then later
Cactus and Austin came along and showed it was okay to work non-scripted
matches, so long as you know how to 1) work the crowd and 2) just have angles that make sense. Which one would you prefer?
- Jake’s snake bites the
Macho Man, while Hogan preaches about Prayers and Vitamins
- The Horsemen beat the shit out of
Dusty, while Flair preaches about Limousines, Gold and living the life of
a Champion
Although, it’s tough to argue the
logic behind throwing a Bad Guy against Hogan and letting the Good Guy
prevail. I’ll have more to say on this around Disc 3 – when it PROVES that
Vince doesn’t know "wrestling" but he damn sure knows how to make money
with this "sports entertainment" nonsense. But for now, I will go
into full mark mode as THIS is what I’m talking about when I say WWE is in
the Catbird’s Seat as far as separating us, the fans, from our money
Quick note – Below is a listing of
matches but I’m just going to type when I feel like adding commentary, so no,
it’s not a recap. Also, The "Easter Eggs" and how to get to them are
all over the net, so no sense in repeating them here – and they are more fun
to find yourself! The one I liked was Flair cutting a promo and getting
himself all riled up, eventually going out to the crowd as Schiavone tries in
vain to keep up…FLAIR (to some Black Guy): Come up here, come up here…hey
brother, would YOU like a night with Dark Journey? BLACK DUDE: Oh Yeah! FLAIR:
"Well too bad, get outta here! ha ha ha ha ha AND YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH
HONEY! I don’t have time today to make a woman out of you! WOOOOO!!!!"….also,
there is a hidden feature that tells the history of WOOOOO! and features many
of the WWE Superstars and Employees providing, on camera, their * own *
versions of the WOOOOO!…but no one does it like Flair. Except maybe Lawler –
his imitation is perfect…
Disc One:
Harley Race and the NWA championship*Ric Flair vs. NWA World champion Harley Race in a steel cage match with Gene
Kiniski as the special referee (from Starrcade, Flair wins title, 23:46,
11/24/83)
Bonus Feature: $25,000 Bounty – Harley Race puts a price on Flair’s head Orton
and Slater collect – Bob Orton Jr. & Dick Slater accept the challengeBonus Feature: Flair Announces retirement due to injuries from the attack
Bonus Feature: "It’s Only Just Begun!" – Flair attacks Orton and
Slater with a batBonus Feature: NWA Press Conference to select the site of the Race vs. Flair
rematchBonus Feature: Starrcade ’83 Pre-Match Interviews:
Harley Race
Ric Flair
Race, Bob Orton Jr., and Dick Slater
Ric Flair and Wahoo McDaniel
Wow. You want to talk entrances –
this one will give you goosebumps as Flair gets the Star Treatment with Also
Sprach Zarathrusta (from here on out and forever referred to by me as ASZ –
too tough to type and I can’t damn well call it "Ric Flair’s
Theme" when ELVIS did it first. Yes, Flair stole his whole entrance from
ELVIS, But, That’s Alright Mama. Flair has made it his own and ELVIS ain’t
around to use it, obviously) and flashing lights and smoke. The coolest thing
ever is that he waits for the music to end before he walks that aisle,
listening only to the sold out crowd cheer him at the top of their hillbilly
lungs. This match is pretty good, but may not appeal to the newer fans as Race
works s l o .w. But with intent. Everything these guys do MEANS
SOMETHING, which is a common theme throughout most of Flair’s matches on
this DVD. Still, this is the match that "made" Flair, as he says in
his commentary explaining the backstory. See, this was Flair’s 2nd time
winning the title – back in those days, they expected you to be able to not
only carry the ball, but present yourself as the Big Dog of the promotion,
when the champ got paid to put asses in the seat, not given a guaranteed
contract and the option to work a "limited schedule". According
to Flair, anyone can win the belt once – for the bosses to give him a second
(and extended) run with the Championship is what separates guys like Flair and
Race from chumps like Garvin and Tommy Rich. Well, that and I’m sure Flair
and Race never "traded favors" with the booking committees ha ha
hawr!. So, this match was very special to Flair for all the right reasons and
needless to say, he proved his worth.
Dusty Rhodes: Talking the Talk
*NWA World champion Ric Flair vs. Dusty Rhodes (from Starrcade, 22:04,
11/28/85) **1/2Bonus Feature: Flair and the Andersons Break Dusty’s Ankle – recap of the
attack in a cageBonus Feature: Flair Cuts a Promo – Comments on Dusty’s injury
Bonus Feature: "That’s Hard Times!" – Dusty’s first interview after
the injuryBonus Feature: Controversy Explained – Flair retains the title after a
controversial rulingBonus Feature: The Man – Flair gets riled up
Bonus Feature: The Legend – Dusty comments on the disappointing decision
Regardless of what you may have heard
about Dusty, or even witnessed over the last 10 years with your own lying
eyes, at one time he was brilliant. Flair describes it best and I’ll allow
you to listen youself (what? You haven’t purchased this yet? What’s WRONG with
you?) Flair, in a nutshell says Dusty was not "the best" in ring
wise, but he had charisma and could go 60 minutes, if needed. Not too many
people who are considered "legends" could pull something like that
off, AND keep the fans on the edge of their seats. Of course, Dusty had the
perfect foil in Flair and used it to his advantage. Watch in awe as Dusty
becomes the "son of a plumber" in stark "working class
mentality" contrast to Flair and his Rolex watches. Absolutely brilliant.
Barry Windham: Keeping up with the
Champ*NWA World champion Ric Flair vs. Barry Windham (from World Wide Wrestling,
45:00, 1/20/87) *****Bonus Feature: Attacked by the Horsemen – Windham and Ron Garvin discuss the 4
HorsemenBonus Feature: "You Cried the Blues" – Flair tells Windham to
"quit talking and do it!"Bonus Feature: Flair vs. Windham 1/13/87 – the match in Columbis, SC turns
into a meleeBonus Feature: Dusty’s Analysis – Post-match commentary on the Flair vs.
Windham matchBonus Feature: Flair Post-Matchy Promo – Flair and the Horsemen celebrate in
the locker room
People laugh when I type
"Windham was better than Benoit and Angle put together" and at one
time, that was a fact. The match that is featured proves this…as with the others, it
must been seen to be appreciated. Again, it didn’t hurt these guys to work
with Flair, but Windham stands out head and shoulders above everyone not named
Steamboat. I remember this whole angle like it was yesterday and Jesus, is it
a great thing to be able to watch it again. MUST SEE.
Disc Two:
Ricky Steamboat: The Rivalry*Ric Flair vs. NWA World champion Ricky Steamboat in a best two out of three
falls match (from Clash of the Champions VI, 55:32, 4/2/89) ******Ric Flair vs. NWA World champion Ricky Steamboat (from WrestleWar, Flair wins
title, 31:37, 5/7/89) *****Bonus Feature: Ric Flair & Barry Windham vs. Ricky Steamboat & Eddie
Gilbert – Steamboat returns to the NWA (1/21/89)Bonus Feature: Steamboat’s Three-Man Workout – Flair interrupts a training
sessionBonus Feature: Flair Calls Out Steamboat – Steamboat and Flair go at it again
at Clash of the Champions V (2/15/89)Bonus Feature: Controversy Recap
Flair’s Lawyer
Jim Herd
Ricky Steamboat
Ric Flair
WrestleWar Pre-Match Interview
This is probably the most famous
rivalry as Flair / Steamboat is synonymous with How Wrestling Should BE. As
with Dusty and Windham, Steamboat was a perfect opponent for Flair’s crowing
and preening – what’s nice is that Flair has the uncanny ability to make
someone look like a star, both in ring and promo wise, but it’s just amazing
that paring him against someone with Steamboat’s natural talent was able to take it to the next
level. I have my preference to Flair’s "best" (which will probably
be evident in about one more paragraph) but there will be no doubt in
anyone’s mind that THIS, as opposed to the WWF horsehit at the time, is what
wrestling * could * be if all interested parties took it seriously. In the
Clash Match, pay special attention to the commentary as Terry Funk joins Jim
Ross to make things * that much better *.
Terry Funk: Hardcore*NWA World champion Ric Flair vs. Terry Funk in an "I Quit!" match
(from Clash of the Champions IX, 18:33, 11/15/89) *****Bonus Feature: Press Conference – Flair announces that he will return to
wrestling(6/22/89)Bonus Feature: Bagged – Terry Funk puts a garbage bag over Flair’s head
(9/12/89)Bonus Feature: "I’ll Shake His Hand!" – Funk says he’ll shake hands
if Ric Flair beats him (11/4/89)Bonus Feature: Flair’s Rebuttal – Flair answers back (11/4/89)
Bonus Feature: "You’re Gonna Say ‘I Quit’!" – Flair interview one
week before the matchBonus Feature: New York Knock-out Promos – Flair and Funk before the "I
Quit" matchBonus Feature: Pre-Match Interviews
Terry Funk
Ric Flair
Lock the doors, give me a case of
beer, a couple of joints, a pizza and get rid of the Wife and Kid – THIS is
what FLEA is talking about – my favorite angle and match EVER. Until
recently, I pegged the Return of Cactus Jack and the subsequent Cactus vs. HHH
streetfight / HITC as my favorites but only because I hadn’t watched this one in
many, many years. It begins after the final match of the Steamboat / Flair trilogy, where Funk
was serving in a "ringside judge" capacity. Funk interrupts
Flair’s post match interview with words of congratulations and a request
that Flair grant him a shot at the title. Flair says "while you were in
Hollywood rubbing shoulders with Stallone, I was ." I won’t spoil it
for you as the interaction between the two will send chills down your spine.
Let’s just say that Funk was a brutal asshole and while Vince was feeding us
more and more Hogan, Flair was getting PILEDRIVEN through f*cking table that didn’t
break. It’s all downhill (in the best way possible) from there, Ladies and
Germs. The promos the smothering with a bag THIS is, for me, wrestling at
it’s finest, culminating in the ultimate blow-off match. And yes, they
are REALLY hitting each other – none of the foot stomping that made
"wrestling" and joke" flow easily off the tongue. I could watch
this section of the tape until I croak and still make Satan hook me up with a
Big Screen and DVD.
The Plane Crash
From Confidential: Good story, if you
haven’t heard the details. What’s even more amazing is that Flair broke
his back in a plane crash and still became a legend, using that bad back to
carry every stiff in wrestling to great matches. The irony is,
Steamboat broke his back taking an in-ring bump and never recovered.
History of the HorsemenA Day in the Life of the Horsemen
Also from Confidential. Good stories and it’s nice that Arn and Tully (do
YOU remember Tully? I do!) get some TV face time to tell it, as it was…
Disc Three:
The "Nature Boy" Heads North
*30-man Royal Rumble for the vacant WWF World title (62:02, 1/19/92) *****
Bonus Feature: Bobby "The Brian" is Excited – Heenan prepares for a
visit by "The Real World Heavyweight Champion" Ric FlairBonus Feature: Flair’s WWF TV Debut – from Prime Time Wrestling (9/9/91)
Bonus Feature: Funeral Parlor – Paul Bearer interviews Ric Flair and Bobby
"the Brian" HeenanBonus Feature: Flair attacks Piper – Ric attacks Roddy Piper at ringside
Bonus Feature: The "Real" World Heavyweight Champion – Flair tells
everyone what he really thinks about Hulk Hogan and Roddy PiperBonus Feature: Rumble Post-Match Interview – Flair receives the WWF
Championship belt after winning the Royal Rumble
Can of Worms open on Aisle One. And
if all of this I’m about to type pisses you off, I don’t care. Flair’s
run in the WWF, regardless of what he says or what you think, sucked a dick.
The only redeeming quality was 1) it was Flair and 2) Heenen was involved.
Good Lord where do I start
THIS is a perfect example of how
Vince can f*ck things up with his vision of "Sports Entertainment"
vs. "Rasslin". Granted, Flair was being abused by WCW Management
(whom he he has no trouble burying as he goes 100% shoot mode in his
commentary) and Vince brining him to the WWF as "the
Real World Champion" most likely cemented his legend (and kept him from
turning into a Dusty or a Sting), but what a bunch of corny bullshit. Heenen
is apoplectic as he pimps "The Real World Champion" and then next
thing you know – it’s RIC FLAIR, in the flesh. But instead of coming out
in a $1,000 suit decked to the nines in Gold, he’s wearing a stupid robe
that should only be used when making an entrance to the ring. Problem 2 –
his grand entrance into the WWF is in front of the Prime Time Wrestling
audience, who just ain’t Atlanta. Watch the first two disks and listen to
the crowds hang on every word of a Flair promo, choosing whether or not they
should cheer or boo then watch the WWF version of a "hot audience"
as they have to watch for "direction" on when to boo. The didn’t
even give Flair the common decency and allow him o turn the crowd against him – the
audience, on cue, boos and gives a THUMBS DOWN in unison, which is quite
possible the most contrived ugh I can’t even continue with this crap.
Just watch how Flair SHOULD BE and then what Vince made him into during his
WWF Run". It’s like
the difference between Flair / Steamboat and Flair / Giant Gonzalez. Yes,
it’s Flair, but Goddamn.
The Rumble Match itself, to me is
WAAAAY overrated. Again, yes, it’s Flair and he does a remarkable job, but
it’s no where NEAR as great as everyone makes it out to be, or to the
standards that Flair himself set. It’s okay, at best. Flair’s best match /
angle in WWF was vs. Savage at WM, and that one is not included.
Then we have the Funeral Parlor
interview that Hyatte says he knows by memory. OH HYATTE! Could you please
tell me why it’s necessary for Percy Pringle to make those hog-caught-in
a-mower faces, while a TRUE professional like Tony Schiavone would just stand
their and hold the mic? More of Vince’s Cartoon Brilliance while The Man is doing his best to
make things work.
The Piper stuff is great, as both do
what they do best – verbal abuse mixed with senseless brutality. Oh yeah,
Vince gets CLOCKED with a chair…but you probably heard that. Flair’s post
Rumble spiel is fabulous, but the rest of this WWF version of Flair I could live without.
And they never even had the Flair / Hogan Blow-Off match. Stupid, stupid
stupid.
Sting: Defining an Era
*WCW World champion Ric Flair vs. WCW International champion Sting in a title
for title unification match (from Clash of the Champions XXVII, 17:17,
6/23/94) ****Bonus Feature: Kicked out of the Horsemen – the 4 Horsemen kick Sting out of
the groupBonus Feature: Reeking of Sex Appeal! – Flair cuts another funny promo on
StingBonus Feature: Ladies and Gentlemen…Sting! – Pre-match interview with Gene
Okerlund
I’ve never liked Sting. He did not have the charisma of Dusty, the presence of
Windham, the intensity of Funk or the talent of Steamboat. But, like the
others, he was thrust into greatness by Nature Boy. The only good thing about
Flair vs. Sting is that the Horsemen use to abuse the doofus religiously and
Flair really got off on telling him him what a dumb ass he is.
A Special Night in Greenville
Bonus Feature: Ric Flair vs. World
Heavyweight champion Triple H with the post-show tribute that has
never-been-seen before on TV (from RAW, 7:24, 5/19/03) **1/2
Nice tribute to Flair capped of by…I wrote this earlier in the week but I
think I’ll include it…from CRZ Land…
Tribal Prophet: I agree 100% with Lance there. Bubba Ray pisses me off
more than anything when he does that. I know someone here went off about
Goldberg using 9/11 to get himself over, but the Dudley’s had no shame doing
the same thing after that too. Bubba stood up on a turnbuckle pointing at
his armband and may as well have been yelling "Look at me, I’m
mourning" except his attitude seemed to be "Cheer for me, I
care".FLEA: No doubt. Something I’ve noticed over the years – watching the Flair
DVD with the Greenville celebration – hell, just the inside pictures of
the box confirmed it. Bubba is like Forrest Gump when it comes to
tributes…he’s ALWAYS front and center! Flair’s on his shoulders, black
armbands, tribute moves, etc. It’s like he has a second gimmick or
something.
And that sums it up. I have heard Flair give more emotional speeches and I
can’t get out of my head that Bubba is anywhere there is action.
Bonus Feature: Flair’s World Wide
Wrestling Federation Debut – vs. Pete Sanchez at Madison Square Garden
(3/1/76)
Bonus Feature: A Workout with Piper – Flair and Roddy Piper do some amateur
wrestling (1/24/82)
– ha ha ha…another match
that’s worth the price of admission. Flair is in ultra dick heel mode and
Piper shows potential as he was on his way to becoming a World Class Smart
Ass. After warming up with two
jobbers, Flair badmouths Piper and next thing you know, it’s on like neckbone.
With Flair being an asshole and given that the history of "what happens
when they do the amateur stuff" rates right up there for when they
bring out a CAKE on the predictability scale, Flair kicks him in the stomach
and proceeds to beat the f*ck out of him. But, it ain’t a title match and
that means Piper gets the fluke pin…now it gets good. PIPER: "What’s
next, you wanna ARM WRESTLE?"…FLAIR: "noooOOOObody does that
to Ric Flair"…and then he and Greg Valentine proceed to murder Piper. I
would be remiss to not mention Flair has heavy scarring on his head and bleeds
semi-profusely just from the grappling. I believe the rumors that he had
plastic surgery done, because he would most likely look like Abdullah or
Carlos Colon, given his marked propensity for self – mutilation. Piper, as per
usual, depresses the hell out of me when I see how great he was and then stop
to think about the bitter mark for himself he has become.
Bonus Feature: PWI "Wrestler of
the Decade" – Flair is named "Wrestler of the Decade" by Pro
Wrestling Illustrated Magazine (11/15/89)Bonus Feature: The Final Nitro – Flair address the fans on the final episode
of WCW Nitro (3/26/01)
Genuine emotion and you can’t ask for anything more.
All in all, you should break your legs to get to the store and buy this. Oh
wait? It’s sold out already? Maybe Vince underestimated how well it would
sell…like Foley’s book. Or maybe, the original pressings were limited
because it make real good press to say you sold out the product in 2 days.
Either way, Flair in his prime is a sight to behold and a must have for anyone
who claims to be a fan. And none of this "it’s so BORING"…HA
HA HA!…wait…
Back to the Piper Amateur stuff – when Flair is wrestling the jobbers
someone cries out "BOOORING", which may be the first documented case
of this on TV. That’s only FLEA speculation, as is this – whoever yelled that
20 years ago probably has a kid that followed in his Father’s footsteps and catcalls whenever someone liked Jeff Hardy is
not killing themselves by jumping from a 15 foot ladder…boooring as you may
think some of this is, it’s WRESTLING and it is, as Flair says " what
it’s all about". And after all this time, Flair is still standing, yeah.
HEADLINES
This week in business – as I mentioned above, do you think that Vince knew
what he had we he released the Flair DVD and purposely pressed a limited
number First Edition copies? It makes WWE look way happening to say that they
sold out of something in two days…or maybe he just underestimated his buying
public. Or maybe a little of both. Something to think about…and it’s not
like you don’t have FREE TIME, especially if you are one of the chumps that
AIN’T GOT IT YET!
This week in business pt2. It’s called "projections". And
"estimates". Just so you know…
Enough of that, we have wrestling to talk. Well actually, I guess this does
have to do with business and could very well effect a product that is very
near and very dear in everyone’s heart – ECW! ECW! ECW! For those of you that
don’t know, Vince McMahon owns the rights to distribute any and all matches,
angles and content from the archives of Extreme Championship
Wrestling…except…
JOEY STYLES!
That’s right! This is something that’s been mentioned several times in the
past, but now, with WWE DVD’s getting hot and heavy into production, Joey has
once again brought this to everyone’s attention – if Vince uses his likeness
on ANYTHING and there will be Hell Toupee, CRZ. No one could ever call Styles
stupid…this was an absolute brilliant business decision (much like the
copyrights, etc. that Jesse Ventura had – which Vince used without his
permission and got sued) he made several years ago and one that may come to
haunt any fan of ECW. Styles, I think, is a crucial piece of what made ECW so
fun to watch – I couldn’t imagine those matches called by anyone else.
But I have to wonder…first, how much would it cost to use his
"likeness" and two, if Vince would even pay. You know what would be
cruel and unusual? If Joey Styles plays hardball (which he has every right to
and is crazy if he doesn’t), Vince gets fed up dealing with him, all visual
and audio evidence is erased from the ECW footage and…
Vince hires Tony Schiavone to Take Joey’s place!
Wouldn’t that be the ultimate FUCK YOU to an audience of ingrates? Think
about it – While The Likeness of Styles is being thrown into the celluloid
graveyard, just have someone transcribe Joey’s audio. Then have Tony do an
intense character study and when the time is right – WAM! ECW! ECW! ECW!
presented by TONY SCHIAVONE! ha ha ha…oh man would that just make my day.
How could you NOT buy that? I think we are all in agreement that it would be
in everyone’s best interest to see Joey and Vince come to some kind of
amicable agreement. HA!
Here’s something that’s a bummer…
"WWE has elected not to offer a new contract of Dustin Runnels,
aka Goldust, after his current contract expires in mid-January of 2004.â€Â.– wwe.com
Other than "bummer" I don’t really have to much insight or
opinion other than I would still like to f*ck Terri and have full permission
to do so, if the opportunity should ever present itself. Looks like Goldust
will get work in Japan, so he’ll be fine.
ROLL THE DICE
Woodward’s hotline this week discusses what he would like to see as the
next WWE DVD release – THE BEST OF BRET HART! He gives his rundown of matches
and angles he would like to see included and ask that you mail YOUR suggestion
to him. As far as what he mentioned, I can’t argue with the suggested content,
but I think, after watching the Flair DVD, nothing else comes close. Even
though I think he’s a great wrestler, I’ve never cared for Bret all that much
and don’t consider him anywhere near the level of a Flair or Steamboat. Or
Windham, for that matter. I’ve seen the match vs. Flair when he won his first
title (it’s on Wrestling’s Gripes and Grudges or something, ask Netcop, he
knows) and I didn’t think it was great – it was decent. My favorites are his
Owen matches – WM X and the cage match (which I have on The Bloodbath Cage
Match DVD), his whole series with Steve Austin, and the Survivor Series
buildup against HBK. You know? This is sounding pretty good! I’d buy it, but
then again, I’m a mark. I’d go apeshit if they put together…I’ll save my
wish list for another time. I could get a whole column out of it, I think.
Nothing on the level of quality material like The Mid-Night News of course,
but at least a news column worth reading on Saturday as we can’t all be great
like Hyatte, can we. There’s your High8 Spot.
Something else that makes the Flair / Funk match my favorite – there’s a
segment (one of many) where they "take it outside the ring, by gawd, and
bring a table and a few chairs into the equation. The table and chairs get
tossed around in a back and forth display of hardcore behavior, but eventually
they return to the ring for scientific moves like piledrivers and punches to
the face. About 5-7 minutes later, they leave the ring again and wind up doing
a spot where Flair throws Funk into the previously used (and forgotten about
by everyone but Flair) table, causing Funk to go sllliiiiiiding headfirst down
the table, then off the table into a (conveniently placed) steel chair, taking
an absolutely WICKED bump, in turn bringing the "Fred Sanford" out
in him, until Flair can catch up and drive his head in to the steel guardrail.
MY GOD is that beautiful. And it was a natural progression, not some lame ass
bullshit where it takes 5 minutes to set up a table or chair or ladder. I
think I’ll go watch that match again…
It appears that positively is running rampant as both Matthew
Poffel and BOSS have felt the FLEA influence and realized that it’s easy to
say things suck, but finding the silver linings and bringing people along with
you on your Magical Mystery Tour is more fun that a barrel full of drunk
monkeys.
PAGE SIX – JACKO AND THE JACKELS
I had planned to do a whole thing on Michael Jackson, and still will one of
these days, because I think he is 100% NOT GUILTY. Yes, he is a freak and has
a ton of circumstantial evidence stacked against him (it looks reaaally bad
when you start talking about how nice it is to have young children in your
bed). But I don’t think there is a sexual bone in his body – he is the real
life version of Peter Pan and that kind of behavior from a Man in His 40’s is
not something that is deemed "normal" " proper" or
"moral" by a harshly judgmental society. I think it’s sick and wrong
what they (the parents) and the carnivorous media are doing to him and I hope
he is vindicated and never bothered again. He is a little boy trapped in a
man’s body, still hoping that Peace and Love and Fun and Games can be shared
by all. And I’m not kidding about this – it takes a bunch to get me pissed
off, but as a parent myself, and if your are a parent, ask yourself this…
How Much Money Would it Take to Buy Me Off If Some Sick Pervert Molested My
Child?
If you can place a dollar amount on that, then you should just wake up
dead. And I’m not talking about the classic line "Sure I’d take a million
dollars to suck dick – that money would buy a lot of mouthwash!
HAWR!"…I’m talking about some bastard sexually abusing your child. How
could someone take payoff money for something like that? That’s what happened
10 years ago in the first case Michael settled…he settled with the family
for anywhere between 12 and 40 MILLION dollars, depending on who you believe.
Does that money take the place of what happened to that child? If in fact
anything did happen, which I tend to think NOT. Why would any parent take any
amount of money to appease them for their OWN CHILD being….ghfkdslgh
fijpwduo ;fewguoiGH;UIDFWAO.HIQJHBJSCVBL JK;VFB JKL;V\H KJO’VBEFHNKPL’ ….you
sick motherf*ckers!
THERE IS NO AMOUNT OF MONEY IN THIS UNIVERSE THAT WOULD FORGIVE WHAT
HAPPENED TO MY CHILD!!!!…and you assholes have the f*cking nerve to call
Jackson a sick freak?
If anything like that ever happened to my daughter I would see that the
guilty parties would suffer. Actually, I would probably have them tortured and
killed, but hypothetically, let’s say I let Justice take it’s course. If it
was someone who could afford a lawyer to get them out of it, as soon as the
"not guilty" verdict was read, I would make damn sure that the rest
of that person’s life would be a living hell. I damn sure wouldn’t be
wondering if I should buy the condo in Bermuda or the ranch in Texas with the
blood money from my child’s escapades with a deviant.
Think about that the next time the People on TV attempt to destroy someone
that they deem Sick, Twisted and Perverted and realize that there are a lot
more people that are More Sick, More Twisted and More Perverted than anyone
with a Peter Pan Complex could ever be…and also stop to think that the Male
Newscaster is probably wearing frilly pink underwear and The Female Newscaster
is into Golden Showers and Shit Eating.
Thanks For Reading! Don’t forget to play in the Wrestling
Dead Pool! Christmas time is coming and you know how depressed people
can get!
FLEA
