The SmarK DVD Rant For Friends: Season Two

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The SmarK DVD Rant for Friends: Season Two.

– After the initial success of the first season, Friends became something of a media sensation during the off-season, to say the least. Thanks to reruns, people caught up on the brilliant first season and became very invested in the fate of Ross & Rachel, and by the time the second season began celebrities were lined up to do guest shots, whether or not the writers had a place for them, and halfway through the season it started to look like the show was going to collapse under its own hype and become a sophomore jinx.

Thankfully, that’s not what ended up happening, and the second season ended up being regarded as the start of their greatest creative run.

The Film

The cliffhanger after the first season involved Ross deciding to forget about his obsession with Rachel and find a girlfriend while in China, but Rachel found out about his feelings for her and thus a love triangle was set up as the second season began.

Disc One

– The One With Ross’ New Girlfriend. Phoebe helpfully sums up the first season in the cold opening, and the guys debut their new haircuts, thankfully, and they became the ones most associated with them. The whole dynamic of the show now changes, as Rachel becomes the pursuer with this episode, as Ross returns from China with Julie (played by Futurama’s Lauren Tom), who quickly became the all-time leading mega-villain in Friends history, despite being a perfectly nice character. The problem? She wasn’t Rachel. The nicer she got, the more fans hated her. The plot of this one is an immediate classic, as Monica tries to talk Phoebe into cutting her hair, but Phoebe confuses “Demi Moore” with “Dudley Moore” and problems result. That immediately introduces Phoebe’s ditz-goddess nature and Monica’s anal retentive tendencies to newer fans. The other big plot has Joey sending Chandler to his tailor, who ends up being a “very bad man” when he engages in some inappropriate “cupping” during a measurement. Joey is oblivious to this, which is the first HUGE dip in his IQ, one that would continue throughout the season. It also features a hilariously true moment, as Ross and new love Julie are playing “You hang up, no you hang up” on the phone and Rachel gets sick of it and hangs up for them. Rachel, meanwhile, sleeps with Paolo again to get her mind off the Ross thing, leading to Ross giving an awesome speech to her about her ideal guy waking up and saying “Oh my god, I’m with Rachel”. It really does work, by the way. Two catchphrases (of a sort) debut here — Monica’s “I KNOW!” and Joey’s delayed reaction to figuring something out. Home run season premiere.

– The One With The Breast Milk. Julie’s shorter hair debuts hair. The idea here is that Rachel hates Julie out of all proportion to anything she’s actually done to Rachel, and gets upset when Monica goes shopping with her”¦at Bloomingdale’s! This is a typical Friends gag, with a platonic relationship treated as an allegory for an intimate one, and it’s always funny. Joey, meanwhile, works as a cologne sprayer at a department store, and gets into a showdown with a cowboy. Joey’s love interest is Emily Proctor from CSI Miami. The main gag involves Carol letting everyone drink her breast milk, which of course freaks out Ross to no end and offers lots of jokes with his discomfort, which is when he’s at his funniest. There’s ton of funny stuff here, from Rachel & Monica’s tearful hug to the big showdown at the end.

– The One Where Heckles Dies. This is one where they caved in and did a maudlin, sappy sitcom plot in place of their usual edgy material. Everyone hates this episode, more or less. Anyway, Joey’s IQ keeps dropping, and Chandler dates women who he then rejects for insignificant reasons. This leads to Heckles dropping dead (and the introduction of Mr. Treeger) and the gang inheriting his possessions because he was sad and lonely and had no one else. However, going through his stuff, Chandler discovers that he’s on the same track, and we get more “Chandler is gay” jokes. Ironically, his worries about never finding a stable relationship would prove completely unfounded and he would end up with the most stable relationship of any of them. The saving grace of this one is Phoebe playing with Ross’ mind throughout the episode by arguing against evolution “because it’s just too easy” until he finally caves. The episode reveals Janice to be married and pregnant.

– The One With Phoebe’s Husband. Steve Zahn guest-stars, before he was a big star (not that he really is now, but I like him) as Phoebe’s gay ice-dancer husband. This was a secret before, so we get one of the always-great sequences where everyone tells their secrets about each other, and the result is Chandle’s third nipple being introduced. Meanwhile, Ross wants to have sex with Julie, but Rachel wants to stall them as long as possible, so they watch Joey in a porno movie and talk until all hours of the morning. Phoebe tries to seduce her husband back to the straight side, but he reveals that he’s been straight all along and just didn’t have the courage to face that side of himself. It’s a funny reversal on the usual coming-out speech. Couple of really funny lines at Ross’ apartment, like Joey narrating himself in a porno and “We never just hang out and talk anymore!”, but the emphasis here is on building up Ross and Rachel’s unrequited love, and it works.

– The One With Five Steaks and an Eggplant. The first major career change happens here. Cold opening sees Ross & Chandler watching “Spanish midget wrestling” even though there’s clearly a WWF logo on the screen. Chandler turns a wrong number into a dysfunctional relationship (especially once he sleeps with her and finds out he’s not as good as Bob), and the main plot sees the gang arguing finances, what with three of them being poor and the other three not so much. The awkward discussion over dinner is very true, although the excitement over seeing Hootie and the Blowfish is an unfortunately dated reference. Monica gets fired over some steaks, thus joining the have-not side of things. Good, but the Hootie stuff is just embarrassing.

– The One With the Baby on the Bus. Ross has an allergic reaction to some kiwi, so the guys get to babysit Ben, which is a pretty dumb thing to do, as they decide to take him out and use him as chick bait. It leads to more “Chandler is gay” jokes, however. Speaking of dated stunt-casting, the guys meet Caroline from “Caroline in the City”, which shows how desperate NBC was to get “the rub” from shows like Friends onto their failed clones, especially since Seinfeld wouldn’t play ball. Max Wright makes his only other appearance as Terry before being replaced by Gunther as figurehead of the coffeeshop. Phoebe gets temporarily fired from Central Perk as singer and replaced by Chrissie Hynde, who knows all the chords and everything. Baby Ben gets left on the bus and the guys can’t remember which one he is when they go to reclaim him, so they flip for him. More cross-promotion here, as Hynde’s version of “Angel of the Morning” ended up on the Friends soundtrack. Two notable firsts here: First mention of “Smelly Cat”, and the first appearance of Giovanni Ribisi, who has a quick and memorable cameo in a role that most people now assume was Frank Jr. before they knew what his name was.

Disc Two

– The One Where Ross Finds Out. The first real classic of the season, as it begins the first major Ross-Rachel fakeout. Chandler worries about putting on a few pounds (which is REALLY funny in retrospect considering Matthew Perry’s drug and alcohol problems, which gave him more body shapes than Oprah as the years progressed) and then makes the stupid mistake of letting Monica get him into shape. Phoebe dates a guy who won’t put out. And Rachel goes on a date to get over Ross, gets drunk and leaves an unfortunate message on his machine after Ross & Julie decide to get a cat. And thus it’s all out in the open and Ross has trouble dealing with the choice. Gunther is named in passing for the first time when Rachel says goodnight to him. Ross & Rachel fight at the end, and then have their first kiss. This leads into”¦

– The One With the List. The “differences between the sexes” bit in the cold opening, with the guys and girls comparing the kiss, is one of the defining moments of the show. Chandler gets a computer (with TWELVE MEGABYTES of RAM! Wow!) and Ross has to decide between Julie & Rachel, so Chandler (brilliant relationship guy that he is) suggests making a list of pros and cons. It’s a wonder he ever married Monica. It doesn’t seem THAT stupid until you actually hear Rachel reading the list of cons about herself, and then the relationship is OFF. Monica applies for a job cooking Mockolate. Joey’s “I’ve got two words for you: Threesome” resided in my .signature for months. Also, “With or Without You” debuts as Ross & Rachel’s song, and their stare out the rainy windows would be parodied later in the season.

– The One With Phoebe’s Dad. The issue of tipping the super at Christmas is explored, as Monica chooses to do with cookies instead of money, and the radiator breaks soon after. First line ever from Gunther here. Phoebe suspects that the person she believes to be her dad may in fact just be a frame model. We get the first look at Phoebe’s apartment and meet her grandmother, and her cab is introduced. Ross breaks the radiator, giving us “Hey, it’s funny’s cousin, not funny!” which is one of my favorite lines from the early seasons. Phoebe wants to meet her real dad, but can’t make it out of the cab, so the guys have to buy Christmas presents from the gas station instead. A bit of a weak one.

– The One With Russ. Big story arc for Channy and the J-Man, as Joey hits rock bottom as an actor and gets asked to sleep with the casting director to get a job. He refuses and ends up as Dr. Drake Ramoray on Days Of Our Lives, recurring in at least four episodes. Meanwhile, Fun Bobby returns, but he’s an alcoholic and Monica chooses to reform him, resulting in Ridiculously Dull Bobby. Meanwhile, Rachel dates Russ, who reminds everyone of someone else. Phoebe’s first “Oh, no” happens in this one. Russ & Ross carrying on a conversation is bizarrely hilarious (“It takes him, like, um, I don’t know, uh, a YEAR to get out a sentence!”) the rest is pretty bleh stuff.

– The One With the Lesbian Wedding. First wedding of the season, although certainly not a normal one. Joey teaches us “smell the fart” acting, and Monica caters Carol & Susan’s wedding. Phoebe’s massage client dies and her spirit gets trapped in Phoebe’s body, and can’t leave until she’s seen everything, and a lesbian wedding certainly qualifies. Striped sweater vest for Chandler here. We meet Marlo Thomas as Sandra Greene, and Rachel’s independence convinces her to leave Dr. Greene. Chandle’s divorced parents are brought up for the first time. Rachel’s horribly awkward talk with her mom about sex and pot is great stuff, as is Joey at a lesbian wedding, lamenting about being Superman without his powers. I don’t like this one so much either.

– The One After the Superbowl. However, whereas those last three are just average, I HATE this one. The show hits rock bottom at this point, as the writers’ burnout hits in full force with a one-hour special that aired after the Superbowl, and was just an excuse to pack in as many celebs as they could. Guest stars abound and they all suck. Joey dates a crazed fan, played by Brooke Shields, who believes he’s actually Drake Ramoray and doesn’t understand the concept of television. This actually convinced NBC to give Shields her own SHOW, Suddenly Susan. But it gets worse. Phoebe sings for kids and tells the truth about what happens to farm animals, and they all love it. Chris Isaak is involved. Ross finds out that Marcel is doing movies and he goes to San Diego to find out what happened to him. In part 2, Chandler dates Julia Roberts while Monica & Rachel fight over who gets Jean-Claude Van Damme (talk about dated). Dan Castellaneta has a memorable role as a janitor and there’s a great Monica v. Rachel fight, but that’s IT. However, thankfully after this mess, they took a few weeks off and rebounded, BIGTIME.

Disc Three

– The One With the Prom Video. This is the start of the greatest six-episode run the show has ever produced, and is the reason that the second season is as beloved by fans as it is. In fact, if I were on a desert island with only one DVD of Friends to watch, this disc would be it. Joey, as a result of his newfound wealth, buys Chandler a bracelet, which is unfortunately the woman repeller from the Liberace House of Crap. Monica has one of the funniest one-off gags in the show’s run, as she interviews for a job with a perverted restaurant owner (“No”¦I like it dirty”) and gets increasingly desperate for money. Phoebe, in the poodle sweater, hits her yumminess peak here, by the way. Anyway, Ross frets about Rachel getting messages from other guys, when it should be him getting messages from her, or they should be getting some sort of joint messaging service or something, but Phoebe reassures him that he’s her lobster and it’s meant to be. Plain black sweater vest for Chandler here. Jack & Judy drop off some of Monica’s stuff, as she tries to hit them up for money unsuccessfully. Ross scares off Rachel’s date and she flips out and tells him off for what seems to be the last time, putting their relationship at the lowest point. Joey and Chandler fight about the bracelet, but Chandler buys another one for Joey and it’s okay again. And with all that resolved, they move onto the grand slam moment of Friends, as they find an old prom video in Monica’s stuff and we get the first look at Fat Monica and Afro Ross and Big-Nose Rachel in the 80s. The reveal of all of them is great stuff. 80s Ross steps up to take jilted Rachel to the prom, but her date arrives at the last minute and Ross is crushed, and with that things finally happen in the present, as Rachel kisses him and he’s her lobster. This one finally fulfilled the potential the show had been showing for a year and a half and was the first true defining episode for the series as a whole, setting up many jokes with the flashbacks and putting Ross & Rachel on a long and complex path to come. And it got BETTER.

– The One Where Ross & Rachel”¦You Know. First appearance of the BARCA LOUNGERS! Whereas the Superbowl episode was stunt casting gone horribly wrong, this one got it completely right, introducing Tom Selleck as Dr. Richard Burke, Monica’s love interest. It was completely the right role for Selleck and he played it perfectly. Chandler & Joey decide to never leave their new chairs, so they just get food delivered to Monica so she can bring it to them. Rachel laughs while making out with Ross for the first time, but a date at the museum goes much better. First mention of Chandle’s Flock of Seagulls haircut. Awesome, perfect episode, and the writers who whined about how Ross & Rachel weren’t funny together are nuts.

– The One Where Joey Moves Out. Another huge story arc is introduced here, as Joey annoys Chandler one time too many and Joey ends up finding a newer and more expensive apartment as a result. Meanwhile, Phoebe & Rachel decide to get tattoos to show that Ross isn’t boss. Ross & Monica go to Jack Gelle’s birthday party and Monica sees more of her parents than she really wanted to, and the result is everyone finding out about Monica & Richard’s relationship. First mention of the Porsche here. Trivia note: Joey is 28 here, so he’s the oldest, since we know that Ross & Chandler are the same age (27) and so are Rachel & Monica (26). We also found out later that Rachel is the youngest, since her 30th birthday was the last one celebrated. Some great writing here as Joey & Chandler split up, especially the fight over the foosball table (“You’re gonna get scored on more times than your sister!” “Which one?”) and it sets up my all-time favorite guest star.

– The One Where Eddie Moves In. A lonely Chandler rents the spare room to Eddie the Fruit-Drying Psychopath, although at first he was just Eddie. Joey, meanwhile, decorates his new place with kitschy crap, including the first appearance of the Big White Dog. Phoebe gets a record deal for “Smelly Cat”, but it turns out not to be her singing in the video, which she takes a while to clue into. Ross & Monica have issues sharing the same apartment space all the time now that Ross is dating Rachel, and some hilariously juvenile fights result, with Rachel playing Mommy. First appearance of Baywatch, although Joey & Chandler watch it over the phone. Ross’ talk with Chandler about moving on past Joey mirrors the talk given by Chandler to Ross at the end of season 1. And the closing rain montage parodies the one with Ross & Rachel earlier in the season. There’s also a Bullwinkle theme here, as Joey has moose slippers and a moose hat later in the show. And the DVD features an extended version of the “juice and eggs” argument between Joey and Chandler that’s even funnier. Eddie’s craziness starts to show through a tiny bit, but not much”¦yet.

– The One Where Drake Ramoray Dies. Phoebe forces Eddie and Chandler to do some male bonding, and the result is a conversation that chills Chandler to his very soul, which is the first Crazy Eddie moment. Richard & Monica discuss how many men have been in her life, while Ross & Rachel compare her sex life with Paolo to Ross (“Not even”¦um”¦chipmunk sex?”), but in the end both discussions turn out fine”¦until they discover that there’s only one condom left in the apartment. Meanwhile, a fishtank triggers a psychotic episode in Eddie (“Funny, because that’s just what someone who slept with her would say!”) and Joey says the wrong thing to a soap opera magazine and gets killed off. There has to be inside jokes in that one. And the trilogy wraps up”¦

– The One Where Eddie Won’t Go. Joey finds that life after fame means a REALLY big credit card bill. The girls read a book on female empowerment (in a gag lifted from Dream On) and poor Ross doesn’t know quite how to deal with it (“How can I grow if you won’t let me blow?” “Um”¦you know I don’t have a problem with that”¦”) Chandler, meanwhile, struggles to get rid of Eddie, who has moved onto an obsession with dehydrating fruit and stealing mannequin heads from Macy’s. The girls take the lightning-bearer quiz and it’s now it’s all three of them fighting, as Paul the Wine Guy is mentioned again, as well as Phoebe’s never-seen Puppet Guy. And finally, everything is right again as Joey returns to the apartment, broke again, and they hug it out. These three episodes BELONG to Adam Goldberg and he should have gotten his own show or something as a result of this arc.

Disc Four

– The One Where Old Yeller Dies. Things comes back to earth somewhat to end the season with the last few eps, as it seems like they used up all their great ideas during sweeps. Phoebe discovers that her mom used to censor sad movies, and the guys bond with Richard over basketball, until he discovers that he’s just “cooler than their other dads”. Ross & Rachel have relationship issues over Ben, as Ross has their future planned out in detail and Rachel not so much (trivia note: One of the names proposed by Ross for their daughter is “Emily”, which is not only close to what their daughter would be named, but also figures into his second marriage), but their fight leads to the first “I love you”. Ben says his first word — “Hi”. He’d say “Bye” after he stopped getting mentioned after the third season. Joey & Chandle’s hero worship of Richard is funny, but that’s about it.

– The One With the Bullies. Another candidate for worst episode of the season. Ross & Chandler get bullied out of Central Perk by a pair of real estate agents, and Monica plays the stock game to desperately avoid having to take a job at a 50s diner. Phoebe tries to meet her dad again, but this time they get sidetracked by a “yippity piece of crap” and then accidentally run the dog over. Couple of great lines (Monica: “Get out before they go down, that’s my motto”. Joey: “That’s so not my motto”) and one big moment with Phoebe learning that her dad left his other family, only to meet Frank Jr. for the first (second) time, which would set up another huge story arc in the fourth season. As an episode, very disappointing.

– The One With The Two Parties. The writers do their ode to Three’s Company, but I just can’t take this one any more. Rachel’s divorcing parents are both invited to her birthday party, but they can’t get along, so in a Wacky Scheme, the party is split up into Monica’s Party and Joey’s Party. The guys of course throw the fun party, and Phoebe is soon herding guests there by the Underground Railroad. The episode is built around everyone having an IQ lower than Joey’s as Ross looks like an idiot preventing Rachel’s parents from seeing each other and no one ever stops to ask why he’s being such a retard. Rachel’s sister Jill is named for the first time. Bad stuff.

– The One With the Chicken Pox. The season continues to run out of steam at a rapid rate, as it’s more stunt casting with Charlie Sheen as Ryan the Submarine Guy. Both he and Phoebe get chicken pox and scratching is substituted for sex here. Monica discusses neuroses with Richard, which proves to be a one-sided discussion. Joey gets a job at Chandle’s unnamed work and becomes Joseph the Processing Guy, who is unfortunately a suckup and a brown-noser. He invents a boat for himself, although later he would buy one. Chandler no long has any problems firing people, it should be noted. Rachel, turned on by Ross wearing a navy uniform at the end, must have loved Band of Brothers. Solid but not hilarious or anything. Special note goes out to Charlie Sheen for being his usual wooden self and bungling what would seem to be an easy role.

– The One With Barry & Mindy’s Wedding. It’s the season finale, as Joey needs to kiss a man for an audition, but can’t find anyone to practice with. Go figure. Ross, Rachel, Monica & Richard all attend Barry’s wedding to Mindy, but it ends with Richard and Monica fighting over kids and splitting up. Chandler meets his dream girl over the internet”¦but it turns out to be Janice, in something of a cliffhanger to the next season. Rachel freaks out at the wedding, but sings Copacabana to compose herself. The big shock ending with Chandler & Janice back together again was good, the rest not terribly interesting.

Overall, idiotic stunt-casting aside, this was a great year for the show that proved the show had legs and wasn’t going to burn out under the pressure of its own success. Whereas there were some REALLY bad episodes to be found here, the highs more than made up for it, and let’s face it, the girls were at their hottest in this season. I think that should count for something.

The Video

Definitely a TV show transferred from videotape, and it shows. Colors and contrast are about the same level as, say, a really good digital cable channel, although I noticed a lot of compression problems in darker scenes and some noise on the transfer. It’s as good or better than broadcast, so that’s the important thing.

The Audio

Redone in Dolby 5.0 surround, it’s never really used. Pretty much all from the center with the audience occasionally mixed into the rears, it’s generally a waste of disc space and would have been just as well served in 2.0 stereo. I should note that the episodes from this season which were featured in the Best of Friends volumes 3 & 4 DVDs, which were released what seems like ages ago, had major problems with the sound mix, and they were not corrected for this release. A good mix, but not a necessary one.

The Extras

Again, a bit light on the extras.

– A commentary from Bright/Kauffman/Crane on “TOW The List” and “TOW The Prom Video”.

– The “friends of friends” listing, giving you clips of all the guest stars from this season.

– Another quiz, this one about the second season, naturally.

– An interactive tour of the girls’ apartment, complete with all sorts of cool trivia about the props and history of the set. You also can find interviews with the set designers “hidden” in the information pages.

– A trailer for season 3, which in later sets would be done with introduction from James Michael Tyler.

The Ratings:

The Film: ****1/2
The Video: **1/2
The Audio: ***
The Extras: **1/2