The Watchtower 3.21.04: Reload This! Pt. 2

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NOTE: This column was written before Marvel solicitations and preview cover images for June were released

Hello, grasshoppers. Thanks all of you (except Mathan) for your feedback on my column from last week. You all made very insightful cases as to why I was wrong and should be castrated for daring to allow Iron Man to fall to the like of Black Canary and letting Wonder Woman crush Wonder Man. However, this is my column, so said insightful arguments will not be printed lest they make my own assertions somehow seem false (as I said in Who’s Who In The DCU this week, I renege and say The Atom cold beat Yellowjacket, but that’s the only one I will stand correct on), ha.

This week, once again I will not be doing part two of my Squadron Supreme extravaganza…and I’m sorry, but once again I am at home for Spring Break (I was supposed to be on a cruise somewhere around the Gulf of Mexico right now, but unfortunately I got sick and my friends are living it up whilst I stay home eating chicken soup and working out at the Y…little do they realize I’m also spending this time re-reading the entire run of Titans so that when they return I will have fifty issues worth of horrible storylines which in my depraved state I will try to turn their lives into) and my copy of the trade paperback didn’t get packed by the freshman girl who handles my laundry (haha, I’m kidding…she only goes and gets me beer from the fridge when I’m watching football). Thus, part two of that epic is still to come, I promise.

Instead, part two of another column I started last month but never intended to do a part two of: looking at the X-Men Reload event. Last time I gave my take on each title after checking out the official Marvel solicitations for the month of May. This time around, I’m going to take a look at the characters and what title I think they’ll end up being a part of and what title I think they should end up being a part of. I will do this with the help of my good friend Chris Claremont, incoming writer of Uncanny X-Men and Excalibur, who, in a recent interview with was kind enough to go through a list of the names of potential cast members and give all either a “spoken for” (i.e. they’re going to be in one of the other titles), an “always interested” (i.e. they might be in one of his books, but not necessarily) or a combination of the two (meaning he wants them in his book, but they’re already in another). Thus my character analysis breaks down into three parts: what Claremont said, where I want them to, and where I think they will ultimately end up. Since Chris didn’t cover every X-Men character ever, I’ll mention a few he didn’t towards the end. Ready? X-cellent, let’s embark upon a little journey I like to call…

X-Men: Where Do They Go From Here?
(The title of course being a clever tip of the hat to one of my favorite episodes of Buffy The Vampire Slayer, the musical “Once More With Feeling,” written and directed by soon-to-be Astonishing X-Men writer Joss Whedon. Come do an interview for 411, Mr. Whedon, where we acknowledge your past genius with brilliant sub-headings! Or at least go out for a few beers with myself, Tim Stevens and Geoff Johns some time in the near future.)

Nightcrawler
What Claremont said: “spoken for”
That’s…odd, given that Kurt’s tail is featured quite prominently on the cover of Chris’ first issue of Uncanny X-Men. Could the character be being shared by multiple writers (meaning I can’t automatically interpret every “spoken for” as meaning the character isn’t in Uncanny…you’re a wily one, Claremont, a wily one indeed)?
What I want: Uncanny AND Astonishing
While Claremont writes the best Kurt I’ve personally ever read, balancing his whimsy with his unlucky appearance, Nightcrawler could be gold under the pen of Whedon, who could use him alternatively for comic relief and tortured soul, something he’s done with many (like, every one) of his character on Buffy and Angel. I’d love to see Nightcrawler do double duty on Uncanny and Astonishing.
What will happen: X-Men
Because Marvel makes every move only to anger me, Kurt will remain the property of Chuck Austen on (adjectiveless) X-Men. Nah, that wouldn’t really anger me; Austen clearly loves the character (rumors about him writing a solo series persist), and he writes the comic Kurt well, but, well, every time he tries to go deeper into what Nightcrawler is all about, we get awful storylines like “Holy War” and “The Draco.” I almost think Austen’s attachment to Nightcrawler is hurting him (Austen) rather than helping; he writes other characters (Havok, Archangel, Northstar, Juggernaut, even Iceman) better than he does Nightcrawler, but seems hellbent on revolving as many storylines around Kurt as he can to prove that he can actually write him. Let the elf go, Chuck, you’re better off without him.

Colossus
What Claremont said: “isn’t he dead?”
What I want: For him to remain dead
His death was one of the most touching stories I’ve read in years and I don’t want to see it invalidated in any way. Besides, he’s still in Ultimate X-Men anyways.
What will happen: He’ll stay dead

Banshee
What Claremont said: “always interested”
Not sure I buy that one. If he likes the character, why did he write him out of his first run like only twenty issues in and then barely touch him for the next fifteen odd years? Don’t get me wrong, Claremont wrote a decent Banshee, but I just don’t see him as being a top draft pick for double C.
What I want: For him to stay gone for awhile
I like the Banshee character. I like the carefree older guy who tells the kids to relax. I loved back during “Fatal Attractions” when Bishop was whining about his apocalyptic future and Banshee shut him up by saying “and what if I jump in front of a bus? Won’t that just spoil all your little predictions” in a scene I’m wondering if anybody else remembers but me; that was classic Banshee. I thought the X-Corps arc was brilliant and far and away the highlight of Joe Casey’s run on Uncanny and I even thought his Banshee was a logical extension of where the character would be at having suffered so much in the past few years…but it pained me to see him not smiling. Corny, I know, but true. When Banshee comes back, it should be under a writer that will take the time to rehabilitate him, but slowly, not ignoring all the heartache, but finding a way to bring back the Banshee I knew and loved. I don’t think Claremont or Whedon will have time to devote to him and I fear Austen would bring back the old Banshee without acknowledging or explaining the attitude change. If I can’t have a happy Banshee, albeit one who can still have the X-Corps period explained as part of his life, I don’t want no Banshee at all.
What will happen: Excalibur
It’s just a hunch. It would be a decent place for him to do “penance,” helping out in Genosha, and Claremont has always written him as a good foil for Professor X. Hmm, maybe this is what I want, actually.

Wolverine
What Claremont said: “spoken for four times over”
We already know he’ll be appearing in Astonishing, his own book, and Weapon X, so taken literally, this would mean he’ll be in Uncanny as well.
What I want: Astonishing
Whedon loves his bad boys and writes them well. Claremont of course writes the definitive Logan, but I’d like to see him confined to one title for a bit, not because I dislike the character, but just for the sake of him having a consistent personality from title to title.
What will happen: He’ll be in every book
We know he’s in Astonishing. I don’t think Marvel has enough faith in Austen’s usual cast to carry a title without him. Claremont loves the character and I doubt Marvel will really turn him down, even if Logan is “spoken for.”

Dazzler
What Claremont said: “always interested”
Possibly a red herring, possibly not; tough call.
What I want: X-Men
Here’s a character perfect for Chuck Austen. He writes a soap opera book and a female character with Dazzler’s personality and emotional baggage (re: Longshot) is perfect for him. Have her living it up like a rock star, hitting on all the guys, and then crying in her room over what became of her marriage.
What will happen: Limbo
I don’t see any of the writers chomping at the bit here.

Longshot
What Claremont said: “always interested”
Red herring here, I believe; Claremont already said everything he ever needed to say about the character when he wrote him last.
What I want: Umm…
Don’t really know; I like the character, but can’t think of a place for him anywhere.
What will happen: Limbo
I won’t be shedding any tears.

Shadowcat
What Claremont said: “spoken for”
I have trouble believing Claremont would give up Kitty, so very much his character without a fight, but we do know she’s already in Astonishing.
What I want: Astonishing
It sounds like Whedon’s stories will benefit from Kitty, the ultimate point of view character. Claremont of course loves the character and writes her well, but his attempts at writing her as an adult have not been as solid as when he wrote her as a teenager; time to give somebody else a try.
What will happen: Astonishing
Everybody wins. If Astonishing is only twelve issues, though, I think Claremont will grab her after that.

Rogue
What Claremont said: “spoken for”
Interesting…seems kind of odd as Claremont has spent the past few years focusing so much on the character and tweaking her powers and personality…not so sure he’d abandon her so easily.
What I want: Astonishing
For some reason Rogue reminds me of the Buffy character Faith, something about the combination of aggressiveness and sexuality; I’d like to see Whedon have a go at her, even if it might cause slight character regression from the work Claremont has done.
What will happen: Excalibur
I think Claremont’s spoken for is a semi-red herring of her not being in Uncanny, but in his other book. Given recent developments in X-Treme, I could see Rogue wanting to go to Genosha and help build a place where humans and mutants can truly live in peace, like what she idealizes the California community her and Gambit are currently living in to be.

Gambit
What Claremont said: “spoken for”
This might not be so much a red herring. Claremont writes Gambit well and certainly seems to have an affinity for him, but he’s always kept him on the fringes of X-Treme and I don’t think he’ll put up a fight if another writer wants him.
What I want: Uncanny
I’m digging the way Claremont writes Gambit, as a smooth criminal with a heart of gold (your words are pure money, Morse). I’d like to see him apart from Rogue for a bit and I think he works better on a team that will see some action rather than aiding in the Genoshan rebuilding efforts.
What will happen: X-Men
By process of elimination: Claremont says he’s not using him (and I believe him) and I think Whedon will enforce a one bad boy limit in Astonishing, that leaves adjectiveless. My first instinct is to cringe, but then I remember that I loved Austen’s Ultimate Gambit way back when; so long as he doesn’t overdo the Cajun accent as badly as he did in Ultimate, this could work.

Psylocke
What Claremont said: “she’s dead”
What I want: Dunno really
I liked the character, and I wouldn’t be particularly upset if her death was overturned (it didn’t resonate with me the way Colossus’ did), but I won’t be terribly disappointed if she remains worm food.
What will happen: She stays dead
If Claremont wanted to/was able to bring her back, he would have by now.

Forge
What Claremont said: “spoken for”
I’m assuming he meant Mystique as the title speaking for Forge, because I don’t envision any other writers really leaping to get him (maybe Austen just because he has a weird affinity for second and third tier X-Men like Havok).
What I want: Excalibur
I do like how Claremont writes him, but more than that, I like how he plays off Xavier. Plus, if he were in this book, he and Xavier can believably remain supporting players in Mystique as well.
What will happen: Mystique
If Claremont doesn’t want him, I don’t think either of the other guys do either (though I’ll still throw the outside shot in for Austen).

Jubilee
What Claremont said: “spoken for”
What I want: Death
Ok, maybe that’s a bit extreme but…no, I’ve only like this character for about two issues during Lobdell’s run when she took Xavier roller-skating and cried when Illyana died, otherwise she’s annoyed me in all her myriad incarnations (including in the cartoon). Maybe she can join Alpha Flight?
What will happen: X-Men
Austen brought her back almost a year ago and has done very little with her, I think he still has plans for her.

Cable
What Claremont said: “spoken for”
This could just mean Fabian Nicieza is using him for Cable/Deadpool or that Rob Liefeld wants him for the rumored old school X-Force reunion.
What I want: X-Force
The character has become so convoluted at this point, I say put him back in the hands of his creator and then take glee in seeing how Rob undoes the last fifteen years of continuity and makes his origin a mystery again.
What will happen: What I outlined above…nice

Cannonball
What Claremont said: “always interested, but spoken for”
And here is where I begin to get worried. Claremont has done a beyond brilliant job with this, one of my all-time favorite characters, since bringing him into X-Treme (heck, I wrote a whole
column on it). At this point, I may even be digging current Sam more than I did Nicieza Cannonball at his best. I am very worried that Rob Liefeld will snatch him away and revert him to a “y’all” spurting Cable sidekick.
What I want: Uncanny
Cannonball deserves no less than to continue under Claremont’s able pen as a member of the active team. Given his stint as a member of X-Corps (not in the butchered Morrison incarnation, but when Claremont first brought him into X-Treme with “Prodigal”), he could fit in Excalibur, but I’d rather not see him reverting to student with Xavier hovering. I want him to continue growing as a character and challenging authority in his own polite way; he’s far more likely to do that under Storm than Xavier. I really just want Sam to stay in the core books and hopefully become a more popular character who can always count on a spot there as opposed to a cult favorite.
What will happen: X-Force…
I’ve come to expect the worst and hope for the best when it comes to my other favorite Human Rocket (bring back the man called NOVA!)

Sunspot
What Claremont said: “always interested”
I don’t think Claremont would use Bobby for the core book yet, but I do think he’d put him in Excalibur.
What I want: Excalibur
He represents a counterpoint to Archangel as far as being a younger wealthy mutant and he’s always had an interesting dynamic with authority figures from Xavier to Magneto to Cable. He also knows how to approach things from a cutthroat business standpoint (skills learned under Gideon), perhaps moreso than Archangel, which would make him an asset to the book’s mission statement of rebuilding Genosha.
What will happen: Excalibur
We all go home happy (provided you’re me or Chris Claremont).

Dani Moonstar
What Claremont said: “always interested, but spoken for”
I think Chris likes all his New Mutant characters, but doesn’t want to deprive the writers of New X-Men: Academy X of continuing to build them when he has other toys to play with.
What I want: New X-Men
I don’t read the book, but from what I hear, the writers are making good use of her
What will happen: New X-Men

Karma
What Claremont said: “always interested, but spoken for”
See above
What I want: New X-Men
See above
What will happen: New X-Men

Wolfsbane
What Claremont said: “always interested, but spoken for”
See above above
What I want: New X-Men
See above above
What will happen: New X-Men

Lifeguard
What Claremont said: “always interested”
I think he had to say this if simply because he created the character and is the only who has ever used her.
What I want: Limbo
She never caught on with me despite a strong start…the Sh’iar stuff was a bit much too fast.
What will happen: Limbo
He may be interested, but I don’t think he’s that interested. Maybe a guest shot in Uncanny down the road.

Thunderbird
What Claremont said: “always interested”
Pretty much the same deal as Lifeguard.
What I want: Excalibur
Not necessarily as a main player, but possibly in a recurring role with or without Lifeguard in tow. Even though it was written by Morrison, his role in the New X-Men issue revisiting Genosha was an interesting one and I’d like to see Claremont revisit it.
What will happen: Not sure
Could stay in limbo, could guest shot in Uncanny with Lifeguard, or could end up where I just suggested; anything is possible.

Juggernaut
What Claremont said: “spoken for”
What I want: X-Men
This guy is Austen’s baby and he’s made the character the most interesting he’s ever been, for my money.
What will happen: X-Men

As for the “friends and enemies” category, Claremont implied the following:

-Sinister will be “all over the place,” but not in Claremont’s books, which I take to mean he’ll be showing up in X-Men and Ultimate X-Men (the latter already confirmed)

-The Starjammers are “spoken for big time,” which I take to mean the rumored regular series will be getting off the ground sooner rather than later

-He’s “always interested” in the Sh’iar, but that kind of goes without saying

-He’s also “always interested” in the Brood, which could be cool as those buggers always freak me out and make for good stories

-And finally, he’s “always interested” in the Hellfire Club, and he already seems to be planting the seeds for future stories with them in X-Treme, which will probably carry over into Uncanny with Sage

Now then, let’s next focus our attention on the characters Claremont didn’t mention (some of whom we already know or are pretty sure where they’ll be come May)…

Cyclops
What I want: Astonishing
Because Whedon wants him, but I kind of think Cyclops should have at least some presence in all three non-Excalibur core books, linking them all, if loosely, in the sense that with Xavier gone, he’s the top guy, as he should be.
What will happen: Astonishing
We already know this; whether he will be shared remains to be seen.

Iceman
What I want: X-Men AND Astonishing
I was kind of hoping Whedon would get a crack at one of my favorites at least for an issue or two if only to see him get some classic zingers. Regardless, I like how Austen writes him and will remains happy with him staying put also.
What will happen: X-Men
I don’t think he’s on Joss’ list of priorities.

Archangel
What I want: Excalibur
I liked how he started out under Austen, but the characterization has gone south. Claremont wrote him well for the two pages he was in X-Treme X-Men: X-Pose, but Joe Casey is the only guy in the last few years that has actually made me care about him.
What will happen: Excalibur
It’s already been confirmed and if he has a plan for him, I think Claremont will use the character wisely.

Beast
What I want: Astonishing
Whedon writes smart, funny and charming guys who just happen to look weird well (ok, I’ll just come out and say it: Joss writes, like, everything well).
What will happen: Astonishing
The other books can get along fine without him.

Jean Grey
What I want: Stays dead
It’s…odd. I grew up reading comics where Jean had already come back from the dead, so I didn’t really have any of the conflict older readers seem to have…but her death as an ending to Morrison’s run seemed so right somehow. I feel like the books will be somehow incomplete without her, but I also feel like she really should stay gone…or if she comes back it has to be way down the line and be a very big deal…I don’t know.
What will happen: Stays dead…for now
When she comes back in the movie, she’ll be back in the comics.

Havok
What I want: X-Men
Austen is doing good stuff with him, keep him away from his brother.
What will happen: X-Men
Nobody else is going to steal him and Austen fought hard to get him.

Polaris
What I want: X-Men
Many have absolutely hated Austen’s “crazy bitch” Lorna…but as I had no feelings on the character whatsoever prior to this, I find her rather amusing.
What will happen: X-Men
Beats limbo.

Storm
What I want: Uncanny
Not one of my favorite characters, but a cornerstone of the X-Universe and obviously central to so many of Claremont’s future plans.
What will happen: Uncanny
Another one that has already been confirmed.

Sunfire
What I want: Recurring annoyance
Oh man, I love this guy at his most obnoxious. I don’t want him to join any of the teams, as it would be totally out of character, but I want to see him pop up for one reason or another in like every title. I want to see Claremont return to the character he wrote for one issue saying “I’m better than all of you, later,” and then sent him on his way. I want to see Whedon have him pestering Cyclops until he pops a vein in his forehead. I want to see Austen write Sunfire vs Northstar in a “who’s more pompous” death match! The X-Men books need more Sunfire!!
What will happen: Consigned to limbo, never to be seen again

Magneto
What I want: Two years and then brought back
“Maybe always coming back is my secondary mutation” wasn’t too far off. I don’t really care how many times he’s been killed off, Magneto should always eventually be brought back because he’s a great character and because he’s cheated death so many times at this point that the writers really shouldn’t even have to explain it. One great Magneto story every couple years or so should be enough, but I want to see him painted in shades of grey again, not just pure villain.
What will happen: Brought back in time for X3

Rachel Summers
What I want: Uncanny
Claremont writes her best, I want to see her again, and her powers are too immense to confine to building a government; ‘nuff said.
What will happen: Excalibur
It’s been rumored and she ties to the title’s past.

Marrow
What I want: Weapon X
Interesting stuff going on with the character there, she might as well stay put; Joe Kelly & Steve Seagle were the only ones who really nailed her characterization anyhow (with an A for effort to Alan Davis, who will be involved with Uncanny, but not so much on the writing end)
What will happen: Weapon X?
I really don’t know what will happen with Weapon X come Reload, even having read the solicitations; it’s the title I’m most concerned about, and I don’t even read it. As I said before, I hope they don’t abandon all the second tier characters they’re currently doing good work with just to write another Wolverine book with a dash of Fantomex.

Cecilia Reyes
What I want: Uncanny
Claremont likes the character and she was always good, at least in a supporting role. I wouldn’t want her as one of the books main players, but she’d be more believable as a recurring character who does not want to get dragged into the X-Men’s world but keeps getting pulled in against her will.
What will happen: Limbo
I just don’t see it happening; plus, continuity-wise, she’s still in Neverland and has to be dealt with by Frank Tieri over in Weapon X (which is also ok).

Emma Frost
What I want: Astonishing
Keep her with Cyclops or there’s no point in the last year or so. I would like to see her in a recurring role in Uncanny as well, though, as Claremont wrote a great “reformed” Emma during “Schism;” like Cyclops, she should be a link between titles.
What will happen: Astonishing
Very much confirmed.

Chamber
What I want: Weapon X
Good character, but another one that only Joe Casey seemed to make good use of as an X-Man. He’s doing well in Weapon X and while I know the nature of his storyline makes it so he can’t stay there forever, I’d say leave him a bit longer.
What will happen: Limbo
It seems like his Weapon X storyline won’t run much longer and by the time he’s done I think the core rosters will be full.

Husk
What I want: X-Men
Let’s see what Austen can do with her without Archangel, he’s done so much to develop the character (and like Polaris, I have no attachments to her prior incarnations).
What will happen: Limbo
I don’t think Austen wants to write her without Archangel.

Northstar
What I want: X-Men
But let’s get back to the kind of good writing treatment he was given when he first joined, not just the constant punchline for the gay jokes.
What will happen: X-Men
I think he was a high profile enough pickup that he’ll stick around; I shudder to think what would happen if he rejoined the now “all humor, all the time” Alpha Flight.

Magma
What I want: Excalibur
Claremont has done a nice little job with her during her X-Treme stint, I’d like to see that and whatever she has going on with Sunspot continue.
What will happen: Limbo
Hunch.

Bishop
What I want: Uncanny
Claremont has made the character his own and I like his interactions with Storm, Sage and Cannonball; plus I don’t think District X will last long and the character needs a home.
What will happen: Uncanny
Confirmed.

Sage
What I want: Uncanny
Still so much we need to learn about her and only Claremont has the answers.
What will happen: Uncanny
Confirmed

Quicksilver
What I want: Excalibur
And here’s my out-of-left field pick for a guy who needs to be brought back into the X-Universe. There doesn’t seem to be any plans for him over in Avengers, so he would be perfect as the constant reminder of Magneto looming over Xavier in Excalibur.
What will happen: Nothing

Ok…so going by what I’ve written, here’s what my ideal lineups for the new books would be:
Astonishing: Cyclops, Beast, Wolverine, Shadowcat, Rogue, Emma Frost (I reconsidered at the last minute and decided only one book needs Nightcrawler and Joss needs a smaller cast to work with)
Uncanny: Storm, Nightcrawler, Rachel Summers, Gambit, Bishop, Cannonball, Sage, Cecilia Reyes
X-Men: Havok, Iceman, Polaris, Dazzler, Husk, Northstar, Juggernaut
Excalibur: Professor X, Archangel, Forge, Thunderbird, Quicksilver, Sunspot, Magma

But here’s what I think will happen:
Astonishing: Cyclops, Beast, Wolverine, Shadowcat, Emma Frost
Uncanny: Storm, Wolverine, Bishop, Sage and a bunch of new characters
X-Men: Nightcrawler, Iceman, Havok, Polaris, Wolverine, Gambit, Jubilee, Husk, Northstar, Juggernaut
Excalibur: Professor X, Archangel, Banshee, Rogue, Rachel Summers, Sunspot


This just in! They released the solicits and cover images for June and they would seem to indicate the following lineups for Uncanny and adjectiveless:

Uncanny: Storm, Nightcrawler, Wolverine, Rachel Summers (maybe? The X-canon doesn’t have too many redheads and she’s wearing green and yellow, the colors of the Phoenix…of course it could also be Siryn), Bishop, CANNONBALL (!), Sage
X-Men: Havok, Iceman, Polaris, Rogue, Gambit, Northstar, Juggernaut

Well done, boys, seeing as how at least the Uncanny lineup is almost exactly what I wanted.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to jump for joy about Cannonball being in Uncanny.

(NOTE: I’m not really going to go do that. I’ll probably go make myself some lunch or something and it is doubtful I will mention this outside the internet at all).