The Daily Pulse 09.02.04

Archive

Hello all, my name is Will Cooling reviewer, interviewer and (hopefully) co-writer/editor of a British comics column over at The Nexus, writes an irregular football column at www.insidepulse.com/sports and will be doing British TV reviews for the soon to launch www.insidepulse.com/tv. Of course, being a layabout 18 year old who is just killing time until I go to Uni next year I always hunger for more opportunities to actually use my brain by writing, so when the benevolent dictator of The Pulse Widro asked me to do today’s Daily Pulse I jumped at the chance. Therefore what follows is entirely his fault as I give you a column that gives you fair and balanced coverage of the RNC, the truth about Churchill in the 1930s, Europeans vs Islamism and Ulster (again).

But first let’s do some pimping…

The Pimp Section

(Widro’s doing html tags due to the fact that I can’t use a computer properly)

I have a confession to make; I rarely read the Games Zone. Not because of the writers but because when it comes to video games I’m like a bitter and twisted old man bemoaning the demise of 2D Platformers and who all that seems important now is the amount of polygons, swear words and tits can be shoved into one game despite the fact that no game has come close to being as fun as the classic Mega Drive/SNES era games such as the Sonic Series, Donkey Kong, Streets of Rage and Super Mario World (with the exception of my beloved ISS/Pro Evolution football games). That said I’m a bit of a Doom fan on the quiet and so had a look at Lucard’s review of Doom 3 and to tell you the truth I was blown away. Now I humbly considered myself quite a thorough reviewer (its polite for verbose) but good god is that a great review. I would say it was of a professional standard but with the state of video games journalism that would be an insult.

You should go over and read the Sports Zone especially the excellent coverage of Brock Lesnar making a complete prat of himself living the American dream…brings a tear to your eye doesn’t it?

The Music zone has some great coverage of the VMAs although to be honest the guys are too respectful to what were some awful choices…maybe most of the staff seeming to be rock fans led them to see each of the nominations as equally bad…well Britney was robbed, Toxic should have won Best Female, Best Dance Song and Best Pop Video. Also robbed were The Darkness who should have won Best New Artist and Kelis should have won best R & B for Trick Me…can’t believe she wasn’t nominated. Also what was with the love for No Doubt and Its My Life? I mean I love the song too but c’mom!

Wrestling contains three minor miracles. The first two miracles were Eric S’s two wrestling columns that amazingly focused on…wrestling! Good grief, he’ll be voting Republican next. Of course if he did I’d happily give him the Misha nude code I possess. The third miracle is of course Jed’s Rewriting The Book that as ever manages to make fantasy booking relevant and interesting without ruining all the fun.

May I also add my name to congratulations for Scott Keith’s 30th Birthday and hope that he’s managed not to notice that the new Velocity recapper Brad is half his age! Actually the boy makes me feel old too due to the very scary fact that I’ve been following politics for almost as long as he’s been living (around two years less).

Finally The Nexus contains thoughtful and incisive reviews of all the latest comics, interviews with the hottest creators including my “edgy” one with the legendary and extremely influential Pat Mills and contains a range of excellent interviews including pretty pictures in this week’s Leave Your Spandex At The Door and a thoughtful and fair look at that most misunderstood and unfairly demonised man Professor Fredrick Wethrham. The Nexus is also the home for two former superstars of the IWC in Ben Morse and Iain Burnside. Ha Ha Ha Smarks, you want them but you can’t have them…unless you read The Nexus.

Okay now I better actually write something…

The Real Great American Bash

So New York City gets to see what the real party looks like as the Republicans descended on the unsuspecting citadel of the old North Easter establishment for the Republican National Convention with a star studded line up that promised to blow the DNC out of the water? Did they? Well let’s find out…

Monday

John McCain

McCain took to the podium with the reputation as America’s real choice for President in 2000, the revelation that Kerry had wanted him as his VP choice and the rumour as spread by Bill Crystal that he would be made Bush’s VP the next day. Whatever you make of these three Rs there’s no doubting that this is the man that America should have had as President in 2000 with the moral clarity, the inclusive nature and unifying spirit that America needed to truly lay the ghosts of Clinton to rest (it took me a long time to like Bush due to him denying McCain what he so richly deserved). McCain’s speech was built on the qualities that make him the liberal’s favourite Republican with a fiercely non-partisan speech that openly avoided any insults at John Kerry in a move that was in the interests not of John McCain (if he’s going to run in 2008 he needs to show that he’s a Republican through and through) but of George Bush-McCain kept his independent and moderate creditability and used it to good effect with an speech full of iron yet delivered with a velvet tongue of compassion, humility and fairness. It may not have been advocating a more sensitive War on Terror but with his exhortations for unity and love it was certainly a more sensitive way of selling it.

Another excellent element of his speech was his argument for regime change in Iraq. I like many other traditional Conservatives were extremely uneasy about the Iraq and I only decided to oppose it in the last week before war due to the disastrous preparations for it. Bush has rarely been able to reach me and make a convincing case for war and when he does there’s a gap between his neo-Colonist rhetoric and the actual policy he’s implementing. McCain on the other hand outlined an argument that was very near to being undeniable, using logic and the bare facts he was able to correctly point out that whether Saddam had WMD at the point of the war didn’t matter as that wasn’t what regime change was about. What regime change (which incidentally has been USA policy since 1998) was about was providing a successor to the policy of containment that was falling apart with same leftists that bemoan the current situation attacking the sanctions as inhumane whist France and Russia were starting to do business with Saddam again and the Kuwaitis and Saudis were embracing him at Arab League summits. The inevitable consequence would’ve been the eventual end (even de facto or de jure) end of sanctions and so the freedom for Saddam to restart his WMD program. That’s a convincing and sensible argument that is firmly based in truth, it’s a shame that spurred on by Tony Blair and Colin Powell it’s the one that Bush failed to make.

However, what made me love him even more was his dig at Michael Moore, an uncharacteristic doff of the hat to the Republican partisans. The response this provoked with the whole of MSG booing the (insert more insults than I have the energy to write) was a sight that nearly brought a tear to my eye. The hatred and contempt for him that was being shown was richly deserved and expressed with really joy especially by the spunky Bush Snr. Best moment of the week so far in my opinion.

Rudy Giuliani

Okay I’m in two minds about Rudy’s speech. Let’s start with the positive; it was in short a terrific speech that manages to span the whole span of oratory with partisan insults, straight advocacy for Bush and motivational anecdotes from 9/11. All of these were delivered in a terrific zip and verve, the insults were delivered pitch perfect in the tongue-in-cheek manner that made them all the more delicious with zings such as the need for two Americas to house John Kerry’s contradictory views. The straight advocacy was done with passion and enthusiasm that whilst being strident and unforgiving were done with the grace that kept his moderate creditability. And then there were the most difficult part of the speech, the nods to 9/11. Now the idea that the Republicans cannot mention 9/11 in making the case for Bush is ridiculous; it’s the pivotal moment of his tenure as President and his handling of it and its aftermath is the major feature of his presidency. The fact that Kerry is making so much of his Vietnam service further undermines the case that as a national tragedy 9/11 shouldn’t be used for political gain. However it’s bloody risky and took really skill and precision to remind voters of that hideous day without sounding openly partisan. Somehow Rudy did it with some great anecdotes, especially the one of the construction worker who President Bush agreed with.

So what do I disagree with him on? Well two things, firstly the frequent hero-worship for Winston Churchill and the insults against the Appeasers. Now I’m a huge fan of Churchill for his tremendous service to the world in 1940/41, for his oratory and his zest for life but the simple fact is that he was flat out wrong in the 1930s. The idea that Britain have stood up to Hitler with effectively during that decade was ridiculous as shown by Germany’s crushing victory over the Allies (hmm wonder what America was doing…oh that’s right selling us dodgy battleships in return for grabbing our foreign assets). Before the annexation of the Czech parts of Czechio-Slovakia (not a typo they changed the name after Munich) there was no good reason to stand up to Germany with public opinion being firmly against it. After that immediate resistance was impossible thanks in part to the financial crisis in Britain of 1931 )as caused by Churchill’s decision to rejoin the Gold Standard in 1935), the antagonising of Italy over their invasion of “Ethiopia” in 1935 (as forced on the Government by a Churchill led revolt), the paralysing fear of the German military machine as possessed by the public (as provoked by Churchill’s dire and extravagant warnings about the dangers of area bombing and the power of the Germany military) and the 1920s cutbacks in the armed forces (as carried out by the War Secretary 1919-22 and the Finance Secretary 1925-29 Winston Churchill). Churchill’s warnings about the strength of the German military machine have been shown to be as ridiculous as the neo-cons’ estimate of Iraqi WMD. Churchill was a bull in the china shop wrecking the attempts of hard working, honest and competent men such as Neville Chamberlain to contain the German threat and build the alliances and armaments needed to beat them. For example did you know that in 1936/7 Churchill wrecked a tax designed to fund military spending increases (the National Defence Contribution) due to the fact that the burden fell heaviest on the richest in society? What Churchill did during the first two years of WW2 was heroic no doubt but his conduct during the thirties and indeed his conduct the later years of WW2 and after were far from what the legend would have you believe.

(Btw, don’t get me started on FDR; backstabbing, empire killing bastard)

The second and more irritating element was his relentless accusations of European appeasement to terrorism. Okay firstly the Middle East wouldn’t be the basket case it is today if the Americans out of jealously for the magnificent British Empire and the slightly less magnificent French Empire (still more than you yanks will ever have-you couldn’t even occupy Vietnam let alone rule it) who appeased Nasser over his illegal and immoral seizure of the Suez Canal in 1956 and so destroyed the soft imperialism of Britain that had given the Middle East a thirty year period of peace and stability (well aside from those pesky Jews in Palestine) with even worse consequences for Africa. Secondly the French for all their faults (and they are many) have one of the best records in the world for counter-Islamist terrorism with their ruthless response to Algerian terrorism (which they had to suffer throughout the nineties) being in stark contrast to Britain that allows known terrorist sympathisers to roam the streets. Thirdly any American has a bloody cheek to lecture Britain (I’ll assume he included us when he said Europe) about appeasing terrorism after years of their open toleration for Irish Republican fundraising, their putting pressure on successive British Governments to betray Ulster with the likes of the Anglo-Irish Treaty of 1985 and the Good Friday Agreement 1997 and finally the sucking up to the IRA by ambitious American politicians…such as one Rudy Giuliani who on St. Patrick’s Day 1993 called them freedom fighters against the “fascist British”. And he says Kerry flip-flops!

Still it was a good speech with some great lines but it left a nasty taste in my mouth…oh well its not like he could ever win the GOP nomination anyway so it’s no big deal.

Tuesday

Arnold Schwarzenegger

I love this guy (in a manly way for once)! There were a lot of people who sneered at the thought of him becoming Governor failing to see past the action movie star and see the astute and ruthless businessman that had amazed a fortune from very limited resources. He has of course proved them wrong by making great strides to get California back on track with a demagogic and almost Bonaparte use of the referendum. His speech to the convention confirmed him as a real player in American politics who if he can get past that pesky constitution the yanks have and get the GOP to stomach a pro-choice and pro-gay rights nominee would walk the 2008 election. His speech here was electric managing to make an excellent pitch for the Republicans with a speech that defined the essence of Rightist politics in a way that no one since Ronald Regan at the 1992 RNC has matched with an emphasis on freedom, choice, opportunity all buttressed with strong sections on national defence. What was rightly at the centre of his speech was Arnie himself with his amazing and inspirational life-story used as powerful testimony against Edwards “Two Americas” message. Plus he used the girlie man insult and praised Nixon, can this guy get any better? Excellent speech that marks Schwarzenegger as a powerful and forceful politician.

Laura Bush

Okay what she said was unimportant, it was fairly bland and safe but what is important is the delivery and how it worked as TV. In short it worked! She has a wonderful delivery, a folksy southern drawl combined with an endearing body language that manages to make the audience like her and enjoy themselves whilst watching her. I honestly spent the whole of her speech smiling, she is just fun to watch similar to say Charlotte in Sex And The City. Add to her speech the so bad it was good introduction by the Bush Twins (man the blonde one is hot) which was fun and refreshing. A good presentation despite what the Fox All Stars say.

Wednesday

Senator Zell Miller

The controversial conservative Democrat Senator who has shocked and disappointed…well those who didn’t look at his beliefs and values by endorsing George W. Bush. He delivered a storming speech to an enthralled crowd with a bullish, determined and slightly bitter delivery from a man who feels betrayed by an increasingly radical Democratic Party. He may be a relic of the pre-Nixon/Regan Southern Democrats but so are a scary (for Kerry) amount of voters with his visceral attack on the neo-socialist rump of the great mass movement party of FDR, Truman and LBJ being the clarion call that social conservatives have been missing in the Convention. His barbs against a consistently dovish and mistaken Kerry, against the weapon systems he voted against, against the funding he denied to American troops in Iraq and the outrage of Kerry’s actions in the anti-Vietnam protests. It was a slightly old fashioned, pre-Clinton speech; the implied reference to the Massachusetts Liberal with his pairing of Kerry with Teddy Kennedy and the elevated and distinctly uncompassionate delivery are not stuff of Dick Morris and triangulation. And its all the more effective for that providing a welcome respite for what must be to my fellow conservatives must be the unbearable strain of being so nice.

Vice-President Dick Cheney

The great survivor of American politics and the most surprising VP nominee in history if you believe the established media who must have said a thousand times that he was going to be dropped. He delivered a good if not great speech that covered all bases; the usually defence of his boss, the claims of success at home and abroad for the administration and the zinging of the opponent. All of this was delivered in a calm, collected and slightly cold manner as Cheney although never sounding menacing or hateful equally never hit an entirely human note. Still the content was good with his lines against Kerry’s Senate record building on Zell Miller’s attempts to define it as a “wrong, weak, wobbly bowl of mush” using his consistent records against the use of force i.e. Kerry’s stance for a Nuclear Freeze in the eighties, against Iran/Contra, Gulf War and the $87 billion funding for the soldiers. He also has the best line of the night with his delicious dig against Kerry saying that a “Senator can be wrong for twenty years without consequence where as a President always cast the deciding vote”. Terrific line, absolute zinger!

Overall

A storming first three days to the RNC as the GOP makes a storming comeback from their disastrous becoming to the year as they struggled to come to terms with the fact that they were to be denied their squash against Howard Dean. I have three general points to make; firstly has anyone noticed how the RNC has strived to fit its schedule into Fox News’ schedule? Plenty of big DNC speeches were skipped by O’Reilly (another great week of coverage from him btw, especially his interview with Patrick Buchanan) or were uncomfortably squeezed into Hannity and Colmes. The RNC on the other hand has kept the big speakers past the 10 pm ET spot with only the roll call and the Regan tribute being note worthy non-prime time speeches. Secondly can we stop this rubbish about how the (ridiculously small number of) demonstrators are the personification of democracy? Public demonstrations are something you tolerate in a parliamentary democracy they are not a part of the system nor a welcome side note. Such demonstrations attempt to use sheer unthinking mass of numbers to intimidate and cower the genuine majority with naked demagoguery. Of course the general public should influence the political process but the righteous freak show that is too many unthinking leftist reactionaries ideal day out is not the way to do it. Public marches are nasty, unnecessary and ineffectual. The sooner the left realises this, grows up, gets a hair cut and engages in the proper, parliamentary political process. Finally with the boos of Kerry and Moore, the chants of “four more years”, “U!S!A!”, “Flip-Flop” I think the delegates channelled some of the energy and mentality of some of the wrestling events that had been held in Madison Square Garden. Whatever the truth the RNC has so far been the glitzier, more impressive and more fun of the two National Conventions.

Now fingers cross that Bush doesn’t screw it up!

A Comics Nexus original, Will Cooling has written about comics since 2004 despite the best efforts of the industry to kill his love of the medium. He now spends much of his time over at Inside Fights where he gets to see muscle-bound men beat each up without retcons and summer crossovers.