It’s been a pretty crappy month here in South Florida. Three hurricanes in a row that have either hit or were about to, with a tropical depression possibly on the way. Oy vey. Just two weeks ago we were pretty sure that Frances was going to hit as a category 4 or 5,which would have absolutely demolished my trailer. Evacuations were in order, and instead of going off to a shelter I was offered by my lovely girlfriend if I’d like to stay with them. The condition was that I couldn’t pack much. One suitcase actually, since some of her family would be staying to seek shelter as well, cramming us all in Anne Frank style.. I started thinking of all the things that I’d really miss in the case that my home was gone when the storm cleared. I packed some action figures, my favorite trade paperbacks, some pictures, and a pair of clothes or two. But that was all after I packed the Holy Grail in: My collection of bootleg Simpson’s tapes. See, a couple of years ago, when I was still naive enough to think of conceiving children I began taping my favorite episodes, so that my child would know what great television was, and also so that they could better understand their father. Just about everything I’ve ever thought or said has been consciously or subconsciously influenced by this show. I’ve lost and gained friends because of it. When someone tells me they’ve never watched the show, I become something of a missionary, instantly wanting to convert them to the church of Simpsondom. When someone tells me they don’t like the show (and there’s never been a good reason), I have nothing but contempt for them. Try as I might I can’t look at them the same. They are one of the damned, a Simpson hater. And the worst is when they say “cool off, it’s just a T.V. show”. No, my friend, it’s a way of life.
On my college entrance essay we were given one of two prompts. One was to pick a character from popular culture that best embodies the American spirit. I chose Homer, and stated at the bottom of the essay as a final plea, “Look, I’d like to be accepted into your college, but if not I hope you at least see the validity of my argument, and give the show a shot if you haven’t already”.
Now the point of all of this isn’t to declare myself the biggest Simpsons fan. I’m certain that’s not the case. I used to think I was, but the internet has this way of making you feel insignificant as a fan. There’s always someone who knows more, cares more, etc.. I remember going on the internet for the first time when I was in eighth grade. I eagerly put The Simpsons into the search engine, hoping I could find friends to share my love of the Simpsons with. Much to my dismay, the ensuing hour would be one of utter disillusionment. I read reviews that focused on technical gaffes and recurring jokes. There were dozens of sight gags I had missed. There were collector sites with people showing off their enormous collections of Simpsons memorabilia. I had always thought I was cool because I owned Bart’s Nightmare (I still can’t beat that Maggie and the Temple of Doom stage), but what did that mean next to an actual Simpsons coin-op machine? I couldn’t approach any of these website members, in the fear that they would make me realize how little I actually knew. Sure, we had the occasional “Remember that time on the Simpsons where…” discussion in the lunchroom, but that didn’t sate my appetite because I wanted more. But with a lack of knowledge about production codes and an ignorance in the language of Simpsons abbreviations I had nowhere to turn to. I was just a guy who loved the show. Every Sunday (and Thursdays for a few years), I watched it with my family, and viewed it multiple times in sydnication.
And I still am that guy. I check Simpsons websites and message boards, but rarely post in them. I care about animation errors and episode numbers now as much as I did then, and I’m always afraid of making some mistake, such as misquoting a character, or missing a reference. I suppose there will always be that part of me that’ll be a nervous wreck, scared of the ridicule I might face. And yet, when I saw that the position for Simpsons reviewer was available on this site, I applied for it. I honestly don’t know what came over me. I figured I was just taking a wild chance, and the experiment in self-confidence would be met with a “sorry, but we found someone else” e-mail. But strangely I got accepted. And even more strangely, I’m not as worried about it as I thought I’d be had I been chosen.
I sincerely hope that I can translate what it is I love about the show into my reviews, and that both fans and casual viewers alike will find something they enjoy in them. I’m going to focus on the stories and characters more than anything since the ingenious writing is what has always distinguished the show from others. I won’t be giving word by word recaps since that would be giving away too many of the jokes, however I’ll let you know of any major changes, give a solid synopsis, and give valid reasons as to why you should see/or not see a particular episode, as well as give a top three list related to each weeks particular episode. What can I say, I’m a sucker for lists. I’ll also be issuing out an MVC award for the most valuable character in an episode. This will be given to a supporting character who has a moment or two in that episode that give it that extra bit of greatness. The Simpsons is filled with a menegarie of supporting characters who pop in and out and make me look forward to their appearances.
By the way I do believe that many of the Simpsons websites are worth your time if your interested in all sorts of aspects of the Simpsons universe. If it exists out there, chances are you can probably find it. WWW.SNPP.Com is an especially invaluable reservoir of Simpsons knowledge that I’ll probably rely on as a fact-checker, along with other sources if need be. I do want to be as accurate as possible. There’s so much Simpson’s knowledge out there, I’d never have time to learn it all, let alone keep it in storage.
Now since the sixteenth season doesn’t start until November because of baseball playoffs and the World Series, the extremely helpful Murtz suggested that until then I review my favorite episodes. What I’ve decided to do is to do my own top seven Simpsons episodes list, counting down one episode a week until the big premiere. Without further ado, I give you number seven in my list-
“A Star Is Burns”- Season six, March 5th, 1995.
Written by Ken Keeler and directed by Susan Dietter
The gist of it- To increase tourism in Springfield, the town at Marge’s behest decides to run a film festival which will improve the towns image. Marge writes to Jay Sherman, New York film critic, and asks him to be a judge. He agrees, and stays with the Simpsons for the duration of the festival, much to the agitation of the jealous Homer who feels inferior to Jay. He badgers Marge, who is in charge of the festival into becoming a judge. Marge fears Homer will undoubtedly pick the wrong film, and he leans towards doing so when the festival is held, wanting to choose the sophomoric Football In The Groin over Barnie’s poignant film about the destructiveness of alcohol, Pukahontas.
Meanwhile, Mr. Burns wants to improve his image as well, and sets out to make a blockbuster of epic proportions, but alas his efforts are all for naught despite paying off some judges, since under Marge’s encouragement, Homer decides to choose Barnie’s film, which wins.
Thoughts- Sure the episode was a cheap ploy to promote the Critic which was premiering for the first time on Fox that night, but what the hell, it worked. They used Jay appropriately in the episode, and Jon Lovitz gave the character a top notch performance as always.
At times when rattling off your favorite Simpsons gags you realize just how many of them appear in one episode, and that’s what makes me put this on the list. It was a well written pure comedy episode.
Favorite moments- This was one of those rapid-fire joke per second episodes, with most of them being hits. There’s so many- Golda Meier, the Leonard Maltin joke, Steven Spielbergo, the Mr. Burns auditions(‘Exactly’), the rapping rabbis, Dr. Hibbert’s Rocky Horror outfit, the always welcomed appearance of one of Homer’s thought balloons, McBain’s stand-up, god saving Todd, and of course, the crowning moment, FOOTBALL IN THE GROIN. Whose memory of George C. Scott wasn’t tarnished by this episode. It was the first thing I thought of when I heard he died. Sorry George.
What flat out sucked- It certainly wasn’t one of the more thought-provoking, social commentary episodes, though we can’t, nor should we have that all the time. I did dislike the message that Homer was stupid because he was choosing the film he liked over the film he was supposed to like.
MVC- Hans Moleman-As funny as Man Getting Hit By Footbal is, what really
makes it for me (the original version) is Hans’ narration leading into it. And if that wasn’t enough, he seals the deal with the classic line: “I was saying Boo-urns”.
Three other favorite cartoon crossover moments from the show-
1. Homer meets Archie- From “Sideshow Bob Roberts”- After Sideshow Bob kicks Bart out of his limo and warns him “No child has ever meddled with the Republican party and lived to tell about it”, Archie pulls up with the gang, and similarly tosses Homer out of his classic red jalopy, with Moose giving the ominous warning “Duh, stay outta Riverdale”!
2. Homer meets Sherman and Mr. Peabody- From “Time and Punishment” segment two in “Treehouse Of Horror Five”- Homer keeps traveling back in time, via his quantum toaster, Homer unexpectedly meets the famous pair from those old Rocky and Bulwinkle cartoons. The duo appear again at the end of the episode in a weirder sequence. “What happened to us Kodos”? “Quiet you”.
3. “The Alien lineup”- From “The Springfield Files”- Homer really does get all the best ones, doesn’t he? This time, he’s spotted an alien, and Agents Scully and Mulder ask him to pick out the one he saw based on their line-up, which includes such extra-terrestrials as Chewbacca, Alf, and Marvin the Martian, who protests in true form, “You are making me very angry”!
Alright folks, that’s the end of that chapter. Stay tuned for next week as we get into number six.
Until then, I’d appreciate some feedback. Tell me what works and what doesn’t. Let me know what your favorite Simpsons moments are, or how the show has affected your life. Drop a line at the link below or IM me at Poet18ic.
