I’m confused. I thought that all finalists for reality television programs had to undergo a psychiatric evaluation and if they didn’t pass, they didn’t get on the show. This is really what’s been hindering me from applying to be on The Amazing Race, but now I guess I’ll just go ahead.
Funny, though, I don’t feel like Stacie J. was adequately shown acting schizophrenic in Episode 1. Yes, she said a few random things, but the editing presented a fairly tame freakout. But maybe I just think that because I of the high school I went to. It was not at all clear that Stacy R. was experiencing the scariest moment of her life (which makes me wonder, exactly where did you grow up, honey?). And Maria’s insistence that Stacie believed in the power of the Magic 8 Ball seemed a bit presumptuous. I am always annoyed when someone takes the time to tell me what my own opinions and feelings are. It shows a level of narcissism that is truly saddening. Fortunately, people with severe personality flaw’s like Maria’s can go far in life if they have incredible bone structure, which she does.
With the exception of the pensive Stacy R., I don’t think there’s a likeable woman in this season’s cast. They all seem to have a nasty streak that reminds me way too much of the girls who made fun of me for eating lunch and not ratting my bangs. Of course, where I come from, those girls are now grossly overweight and preparing school lunches for the next generation of teenage divas or ringing up my full tank of gas as I leave my parents’ house after Christmas. The Apprentice frightens me, because it shows that what goes around does not always come around. These women are mean and that is why they’re successful.
Several of them seem to be clones of each other, as well. In one of the first scenes, Sandy, Elizabeth, and Jennifer M. are all shown standing together and I laughed out loud at how much they all resembled one another. The severe make-up, the overly blow-dried hair, and the sneers were all the same. It was like a scene from Heathers 2: Back from the Grave.
I suppose that by judging these women on their looks, I’m being just as bitchy as I accuse them of being. Then again, consistency of thought was never really my forte. I’d make a lousy businesswoman.
I didn’t agree with Proctor and Gamble’s preference for Apex’s approach to this week’s assignment. I thought that Mosaic approached the task in a much more creative way and if given a choice between attending the two events, I definitely would have skipped Mr. Piazza’s yawnworthy tooth brushing session in favor of the fire eaters, especially since cash prizes were involved. Now, if Orlando Bloom had been the one cleaning his mouth in Union Square, that would have been a different story.
Mosaic’s recovery after their original $1,000,000 giveaway idea was scrapped was also quite excellent. They still awarded some significant chunks of change and provided fantastic circus-type entertainment. Plus, Raj’s cane was totally in context for the situation.
Burnett could have definitely spared me the Titanic “I’m the king of the world” moment that Mosaic enjoyed after their lavish dinner. And as the music swelled over the glow of the Statue of Liberty, I started to dry heave. Don’t ever do that again, Mark. You’re not even American, for crying out loud.
In the end, I was actually kind of disappointed to see Stacie get the boot. Her termination had everything to do with a past event and diverted attention away from the poor performances of Maria, Ivana, and Elizabeth. There’s a chance history will repeat itself and the actions of these three will come back to bite them in their pert, yoga-toned behinds in the future. I really hope so. Get out of the way, clowns, so that a nice girl can finish first for once.
