The Daily Pulse, 11.10.04

Archive

THE PIMP SECTION

Angeloni finishes up his list of underrated games.

Goforth reflects on his predictions from five months ago and, lo and behold, he got a huge proportion of them correct. He can judge WWE booking better than I can, so go read him.

Whitelaw reflects on some great matches from an era when WCW and WWF weren’t producing many. And damn skippy on the Misawa/Kawada entries. That ’94 match is just incredible to watch.

Falconi points out an obvious warning: if you’re in a house with women, put the damn seat down after you’re done pissing.

Nguyen goes over all of the latest conflicts off the field.

Maillaro has Marvel, Stevens has DC, Erhardt has trivia, and Morse has the Comics equivalent of The Mean.

Campbell does Six Degrees and more.

THE ANTI-SPYWARE SECTION

Remember, this all started because the slugs at Enigma Software dared to advertise their piece of shit SpyHunter at 411 (one of the reasons why I decided to leave, honestly). So I’m responding every single column with proper anti-spyware information. And guess what? People are actually taking this to heart. They’re asking me for help if they’re infested, or they’re writing me telling me that their browsing experience is less annoying thanks to the stuff I’ve been putting up here three times a week for a few months now.

(And as I understand it, there are some unscrupulous browser toolbar people trying to advertise here at the Pulse. Well, don’t click on that ad, whatever you do. We’ll still get the money from the impressions, and your system will stay safe.)

Big, big Kudos to the guys at the Spyware Warrior Forum for pointing out to everyone the extent of criminal activity participated in by Enigma Software, makers of the bane of advertising on that site, SpyHunter. Slimeballs extraordinare, aren’t they? And in case you need more info about what flaming bags of shit they are, try here. Suzi’s Blog has a great list of other flaming bags of shit that promote anti-spyware programs that are spyware themselves. Consult it if you have questions.

(On a side note, those SpyHunter ads started over at Reality News Online, and BFM, a contributor there, spotted them. He told the webmaster, gave him those links that I cited above, the webmaster read them, the blood drained out of his face, and he contacted his ad provider. No more ads for Enigma products on RNO, thank you. So guess what? If you provide the info, there are sites who will listen.)

One of the leading vectors for spyware is so-called free programs that contain this shit in order to “pay the bills”. No one deserves that kind of treatment. If you’ve got a question about whether or not a certain program contains spyware, head over here. It’s a nice alphabetized list of programs that do contain spyware and should be avoided at all costs.

Here’s a list of the programs you really need to help you get rid of menaces, and, more importantly, prevent them from occurring in the first place:

Spybot and AdAware. The ONLY two spyware removal tools to trust. Do NOT buy any spyware removal tools, because none of them work better than these two, and all of them except these two are suspect.

SpywareBlaster. Will nuke thousands of different potentially malicious ActiveX controls, and now has the ability to prevent a number of non-ActiveX methods of installing spyware for people who use Mozilla/Firefox.

SpywareGuard. From Javacool, like SpywareBlaster. It’s a real-time scanner for spyware. A decent first line of defense.

IE-SpyAd. Throws numerous ad-related URLs into IE’s Restricted Zone, where they won’t display or affect your system. Bookmark this one, since it’s the only one that doesn’t have an in-program update.

A few people have recommended also installing the Sun Java Virtual Machine, since it’s Windows’ buggy, half-assed implementation of the JVM that allows a lot of spyware to install (less so within the past month and a half than before). I STRONGLY recommend that you visit here and update your version of Java.

So many people have asked about a free anti-virus program that I’m also going to recommend AVG. Totally free, and works really, really well, as well as commercial anti-virus programs. Frequent database updates, good heuristic detection, everything you want in an anti-virus package.

Another program that I’d like to add here is a little tough to work with for noobs if it goes buggy (you need to know a little something about your Networking settings in order to debug if something should go wrong). Protowall is a supplement to your firewall or NAT system. It hooks directly into XP’s networking system to block any and all traffic that comes from URLs on a list maintained by the program (all protocols, not just TCP/UDP). It’s mainly designed for anti-P2P purposes (which will appeal to a great many of my readers), but it contains lists to block spyware and ads. Its blocklist can easily be updated using its supplementary program, Blocklist Manager. I have Protowall running and a Blocklist Manager icon on my desktop, and I use Blocklist Manager to update the blocklist every couple of days. You will have problems getting to some sites unless you shut down Protowall temporarily, like ESPN or Sports Illustrated, but it does have a tray icon you can right-click and shut down in a few seconds. It’s the third layer of anti-ad material for me, with IE-SpyAd and AdSubtract running alongside it. Warning, though: it only works with XP. I’d recommend its predecessor, Peer Guardian, for other MS OSes, but it isn’t being developed anymore, and there were still bugs in it when development stopped. You can get Protowall and the Blocklist Manager (which will also work with Peer Guardian) at Bluetack’s site.

Of course, only download them from the links provided above. And only download those programs; don’t fall for the ads that are shown at various websites.

With AdAware and Spybot, check for updates using their internal update function at least once a week. Run them at least once a week or whenever you think you might have problems. Remember, the new version of Spybot has browser protection capabilities, so have that run at startup and leave it running. Check for updates to SpywareBlaster once a week. It only needs to be run once initially in order to establish protection. Then, after it downloads updates, just click on the line that says “Enable Protection For All Unprotected Items” and kill it. It doesn’t need to be active. For IE-SpyAd, bookmark the site and check for updates twice a week, since it has no kind of internal updater. Since all it does is add Registry entries, it doesn’t eat up anything. Run the Blocklist Manager every couple of days to make sure that you keep up on the latest banned URLs.

If you’re having trouble with spyware or a browser hijacker, or think that you do, head over to the SpywareInfo Forums, where the pros there can help you diagnose and get rid of stuff. I was promoted to Full Helper status there and ended up joining ASAP, the Alliance of Security Analysis Professionals. Look for their symbol.

The Ravin’ Cajun asks me to recommend a good client-side spam filter for MS mail programs running under Windows. Now, this is something I don’t have experience with because my ISPs have always had good spam filtering, plus, I use Thunderbird, which handles the remainder quite nicely, thank you. Some readers wrote in and recommended SpamBayes, which is totally free and supposedly works very well, so I’ll add it on to the anti-annoyance list that we’re building up here.

Now that 1.0 has been released, I feel good in recommending Firefox as an alternative to IE. Go grab a copy and see what you’re missing.

GOODBYE, MARTIN BORMANN

I had told people (and Fleabag) that one of the bright spots of the election disaster would be if Attorney General John Ashcroft would resign after four years of untrammeled trampling over civil liberties. Well, he did that on Tuesday. Thank you, God.

For those of you who have forgotten, Attorney General Bormann was the guy who wanted the abominable, disgusting Patriot Act, which made a mockery of the Bill of Rights. He was responsible for making every trip of mine into an airport into a humiliating experience (I always feel that I’m one step away from a cavity search despite being blond, grey-eyed, and looking nothing like a profile of a terrorist). He was responsible for bringing religion into the Justice Department; not even Ed Meese stooped that low. His people let Microsoft off the hook after they had Gates and Ballmer in a f*cking noose. Enron prosecutions went virtually nowhere under his watch (Ken Lay should be in pound-me-in-the-ass prison (not an Office Space quote, BFM; I’ve never seen the film)). The list of sins against the American public is long and dishonorable.

But he’s gone now. Things might get better. But, then again, they might not. His replacement is almost certainly going to be Alberto Gonzales, the current White House counsel. He’s one of Dubbaya’s Texas butt-buddies. Dubbaya appointed him to the Texas Supremes when he was still governor down there. He’s the one who cleared all of the legal shenanigans regarding the Geneva Convention and its non-application in regard to Iraqi prisoners. Is this a case of the devil you know being better than the devil you don’t?

No. Ashcroft was pure evil, period. Anyone is better than him. Of course, it would have been better had he been out on January 20th, along with the rest of the Junta, but I’ll take this as a victory and move on from there. They’ve been few and far between over the last week.

Now if we can only get Ann Veneman to resign…

SLAUGHTERHOUSE FIVE

From CNN:

Iraqi troops retaking the city of Falluja have found hostage “slaughterhouses” where people were held captive and beheaded, an Iraqi military official said Wednesday.

Maj. Gen. Abdul Qader Mohammed Jassem Mohan, commander of Iraqi forces in the battle, said his soldiers found CDs that show beheadings and black clothes worn by kidnappers when seen on television.

“We have found hostage slaughterhouses in Falluja that were used by these people (kidnappers) and the black clothing that they used to wear to identify themselves, hundreds of CDs and whole records with names of hostages,” The Associated Press quoted the general as saying.

Okay, if it’s a slaughterhouse and it’s under US control, that means that USDA personnel will be assigned there. Knowing my luck, I’ll be detailed out. It’ll be one helluva travel voucher, though, and the dry, hot weather should help this cold of mine…

…this job is getting to me if that’s the first thing I think. I’m making light of innocent hostages being killed so that I can make a joke about my job? That’s low, even for me. Shit, even a Kurt Vonnegut reference is in bad taste. Of course, I’ve never worried about that before. It must be the new pills. I know that Lamictal mellows me out, and Risperdal seems to make my work day go faster…

…and now I’m talking about my pharmacological adventures. Look, this one’s disgusting. It’s sickening to think that after the “end of the war”, the US military is doing a city siege, but now this has come about. What’s going on down there is barbarous. It shouldn’t surprise anyone that there were safe houses in Fallujah where militants could execute hostages. But it still comes as a shock to the system. It doesn’t bode well for the Prime Minister’s cousin, who was taken hostage today.

I’d just prefer not to think about these kinds of situations, but they happen. Islam is not a religion of barbarians. It’s produced a sophisticated, literate, intelligent culture. The problem is the people who twist its message to make it acceptable to Allah to commit barbarities in His name. Please, remember that when stories like these come out, and don’t blame followers of Islam in general.

And speaking of followers of Islam…

BE PREPARED

For the last week, I’ve been waiting to do an In Memoriam to Yasser Arafat, mostly because it would piss off all of the people of Jewish persuasion in the audience who lambast me whenever I say anything good about the Palestinians or anything bad about the Israelis. Well, Israel, the Palestinian Aut
hority, and Egypt aren’t waiting for him to die in Paris. They’ve already got the funeral arrangements made. So, to plan for your mourning or celebration at his kicking the bucket, here’s what’s going to happen according to CNN:

Israel agreed to allow Arafat to be buried at his Ramallah compound in the West Bank after an Israeli Cabinet security meeting Wednesday morning, the office of Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon said.

Also Wednesday, Palestinian officials accepted an offer by Egyptian officials to host Arafat’s state funeral in the Cairo suburb of Nasr City.

Palestinian Foreign Minister Nabil Sha’ath said the executive committee of the Palestinian Authority agreed to a Cairo funeral during a meeting in Ramallah Wednesday.

“We’ve accepted President (Hosni) Mubarak’s invitation to have the funeral in Cairo, where he (Arafat) will be laid in state and where many world leaders will come and pay him respect,” Sha’ath told CNN’s Wolf Blitzer in a taped interview.

“Then he will be transported by an Egyptian helicopter directly from Cairo to Ramallah, where he will also have a public procession here and prayers. Then he will be buried in a tomb in Muqataa.” Muqataa is Arafat’s compound in Ramallah.

And how has Israel prepared for this event, which could kick off more Intifada fun and games?

Israel will allow a procession and burial of Arafat in Ramallah.

The Palestinians will be responsible for security inside Ramallah.

Israel Defense Forces will be in charge of security outside the West Bank city.

Israel will allow Israeli citizens to attend burial ceremonies in Ramallah.

Only Palestinian VIPs will be allowed to travel from Gaza to Ramallah for services.

Israeli police will be on special alert in Jerusalem.

That’s awfully lenient of them considering who the subject of the obsequies will be, and, in general, a good plan. Now all we have to do is wait for the end to come, and see if all of the preparations pay off. Palestinian funerals are rarely a peaceful event in the West Bank. Let’s just hope that everyone has enough respect to honor a man that moved beyond violence and tried his best to work toward a peaceful solution to a vexing, nearly-insoluble problem.

You won’t have to wait long for another appearance by me. I’ll have the Short Form this weekend, as well as an appearance in the Round Table for Survivor Series. Until then, I’m going to try to figure out why the forces of evolution considered mucus to be a good idea.