InsidePulse’s WWE Smackdown! Report 1.13.05

First off, I want plug what I think may be the best Heat recap I’ve ever read. Heat is such a great show, so I suggest you must check out this weeks pre-NYR Heat right here. I honestly don’t know why this guy doesn’t get more praise.

We start off with a video package covering the Angle/Weber stuff from last week.

We start off with Angle seen wanting to get through Show to talk to Joy. Angle says last week was embarassing and apologizes. Show says Angle has guts for apologizing, and that if JBL doesn’t do the same, he’ll beat it out of him.

Taped from Tampa, Florida
Hosts are Tazz & Michael Cole

Cole and Tazz welcomes us, and to get ready because tonight the US Championship is on the line and JBL will be celebrated for whatever reason.

Rey Mysterio & Rob Van Dam (c) vs. Eddie Guerrero & Booker T vs. Luther Reigns & Mark Jindrak vs. Basham Brothers – WWE Tag Team Championship match
Elimination rules. RVD has a really noticable knee injury. Eddie and Jindrak start off. Big “Eddie” chant. Jindrak does his Val Venis impression, but Eddie fires back and sends him into the corner for chops. Jindrak comes back with a shoulder. Eddie grabs a hammerlock as the crowd gets back behind him. Eddie goes for a wristlock, but Jindrak powers him into a headlock, and keeps on jirating. Eddie gets out, and brings in Booker. Booker counters a hiptoss with a short cothesline. Eddie in. Booker gets a sidewalk slam, and Eddie jumps in with a heelo for 2. Jindrak gets a backdrop for 2. Eddie gets a dropkick and tags in Doug. The two heel teams go at it, and Doug sets up Mark on the ropes, allowing Rey to come in with a 619! Doug gets 3 off of that.

Commercial break.

We’re back with Rey getting a modified amrdrag on Doug. Eddie gets tagged in by Doug, and he’s not happy. Rey gets a headscissors, but Eddie sends him in his corner and brings in Booker. Spinebuster gets 2 for Book. Rey comes back with a dropkick, but he gets sent back into the corner, where Eddie does some cheating. Eddie in, and an uppercut gets 2. Gory Special, but Rey counters out with an armdrag. Springboard into a hurricanrana gets…3! The Bashams double team Rey. Doug tags in Danny, and attacks Rob’s injured leg with the steps. Doug back in, and he continues to dominate over Rey. Rey comes back with a sprinboard crossbody for 2. Rey goes back out to check on Rob, who’s being set up on a stretcher. Doug gets a suplex back in the ring for 2. Rey comes back with a modified bulldog for 2. Rey sends Danny out with a heel kick and gets a headscissors on Doug to set up the 619. It connects, but Doug ducks a springboard to knock the ref, and Danny switches to get the Brain Damage, which gets 3. JBL and Co celebrate afterwards. Good match.

Commercial break.

Josh in the back with Kenzo. Hiroko says Cena tried to split them up, America’s favorite couple. Kenzo says him with the US title will be a monument, and finishes it off with “God bless America.”

Backstage, Show runs into JBL, Amy, and Orlando. Show says the one thing keeping him from ripping JBL’s head off is an apology. JBL apologizes, and Show says Amy need to too. Weber says Joy liked being the center of attention, and calls her a slut. The two get into it, seperated by the men. Long walks in, and makes Amy vs. Joy tonight, with all parties barred from ringside.

Commercial break.

We see the press release of the Japaneese tapings.

Kurt Angles vs. Roderick Strong (?)
Angle talks smack about JBL beforehand. Kurt asks what his chances are, and the kid replies with a bitch slap! Kurt catches him and beats the hell out of him. Roderick ducks a clothesline and gets a school boy for 2! Kurt flips him over with a german, and Ankle Lock finishes it.

Kenzo/Cena, next!

Commercial break.

Kenzo Suzuki vs. John Cena (c) – United States Championship match
No Way Out tickets go on sale this Saturday. Cena’s hat is blurred out, for whatever reason. Cena doesn’t really rap, as he just talks about America. Kenzo gets in some offense to start, but Cena takes him back down. Rear back elbow, and a modified bulldog by Cena sets up the 5-Knuckle Shuffle. FU and that’s it!

House show footage.

Backstage, Weber’s seen crying about wrestling tonight.

Meanwhile, Joy’s seen oiling up, and her match is next!

Commercial break.

Video package covers the Heidenrich/Taker stuff from last week.

Amy Weber comes out for her match, but Joy no shows, so Amy is automatically the winner.

Still to come, JBL’s gonna be honored by some Florida group.

Commercial break.

Long is seen talking to a ref about the missing of Joy. Show barges in and demands Teddy get to the bottom of this. Heidenrich walks in, and he yets again wants out of the Casket match with Taker. That’s a no-go, and it’s JBL’s turn to walk in. Teddy asks where Joy is, and John says he doesn’t know. Teddy doesn’t buy it.

Commercial break.

We’re back with JBL still talking to Teddy. Long says JBL better be telling the truth, or else he will strip him of the title first thing next week.

Funaki (c) vs Nunzio – WWE Cruiserweight Championship match
Nunzio takes it to Funaki, and gets a shoulderblock for 2. Backdrop gets 2 for Funaki. Pull of the hair gets a quick cover for Nunzio. Funaki comes off the middle rope, but Nunzio dropkicks him in the gut (!) for 2. Funaki gets an enzuigiri for 2. Funaki gets a bulldog for 2. Crossbody by Funaki, but Nunzio rolls through for 2. Rising Sun gets 3.

Backstage, Long is seen questioning Carlito about Joy. Carlito says what happened to Joy is not cool. Torrie and Jackie walk in, and say they saw Orlando Jordan heading in the same direction when Joy was walking to the ring. Long orders a guy to go get Orlando.

Commercial break.

Back, and Orlando admits it. Admits that he told Joy that Amy was gonna kick her butt. Show runs in and wants to know where Joy is. Jordan doesn’t know.

RAW Rebound.

Up next, JBL will be honored by the Florida Agricultural Group (FAG).

Commercial break.

We’re back with the red carpet on the ring, and oranges in it. The FAG President introduces JBL, who comes out with all his employees. Apparently, JBL helped out Florida a lot in 2004. He gets a FAG plaque. JBL says agriculture is the backbone of America’s economy. He reads a speech, where he says he did it for all the people who need oranges. He did it for the people who sit together and chant his name. The fans don’t cheer him, but JBL says that they don’t know how to cheer because their football team gives them nothing to cheer for. Angle comes out and says this whole thing is a joke. Kurt acuses JBL of kidnapping Joy. In fact, she’s in the trunk of the limo! This brings out Big Show, who’s pretty pissed off. Show takes out all of JBL’s guys. Chokeslams are dealt out to the Bashams. Jordan goes low and gets a chair, but Show just comes back with another Chokeslam, and beats the hell out of Orlando with the chair.

Backstage, Angles is seen laughing saying he loves it when a plan comes together.

~Rave

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