Start Playing Your Rocky-Inspired Theme Music Now. That’s How We Roll
What up, my peeps. No time for small talk today, we’re already late as it is.
Inside Pulse’s Official Coca Cola 600 Coverage
The Indianapolis 500 may be the more important race historically, but it’s not the biggest Memorial Day Weekend race anymore. That honor now belongs to the World 600… Eh, what was once known as the World 600. It’s now called the Coca-Cola 600, and it’s the culmination of NASCAR’s version of the All-Star Break. The Coca-Cola 600 is actually more than just the token Memorial Day NASCAR tradition; the 600, as its known in Charlotte, is the longest distance/lap event in North America, if not the world. Everything will start to unfold beginning Wednesday, as Goody’s Pole Night kicks off at Lowe’s. Until then, keep it here at Inside Pulse for continuing coverage of the 600. For now, though, let’s settle in with the Nextel All Star Challenge and the Open preliminary.
Special Race #4 of 5: The Nextel Open
Date: Saturday, May 21st, 2005 from Charlotte, North Carolina
Time: 7:00 PM on FX
Pole Sitter: Mike Bliss (189.208 MPH)
Style: 1 Segment – Standard Lap Event.
Prize: Entrance to the Nextel All Star Challenge
Qualifing Results – Nextel Open
01. #0 Mike Bliss – NetZero Best Buy Chevrolet
02. #5 Kyle Busch – Kellogg’s Chevrolet
03. #41 Casey Mears – Target Dodge
04. #77 Travis Kvapil – Kodak/Jasper Engines Dodge
05. #25 Brian Vickers – GMAC/ditech.com Chevrolet
06. #49 Ken Schrader – Schwan’s Home Service Dodge
07. #37 Kevin Lepage – Underdog Dodge
08. #1 Martin Truex Jr. -Bass Pro Shops/Tracker Chevrolet
09. #50 Jimmy Spencer – Arnold Development Companies Dodge
10. #21 Ricky Rudd – Motorcraft Genuine Parts Ford
11. #32 Bobby Hamilton Jr. – Tide Chevrolet
12. #7 Robby Gordon – Fruit of the Loom Chevrolet
13. #40 Sterling Marlin – Coors Light Dodge
14. #43 Jeff Green – Cheerios/Betty Crocker Dodge
15. #22 Scott Wimmer – Caterpillar Dodge
16. #31 Jeff Burton – Cingular Wireless Chevrolet
17. #42 Jamie McMurray – Texaco/Havoline Dodge
18. #45 Kyle Petty – Georgia-Pacific/Brawny Dodge
19. #07 Dave Blaney – Jack Daniel’s Country Cocktail Chevrolet
20. #66 Hermie Sadler – Peak Fitness Ford
21. #160 Derrike Cope – Year One Chevrolet
22. #136 Boris Said – CENTRIX Financial Chevrolet
23. #192 Eric McClure – Front Row Motorsports Chevrolet
24. #4 Mike Wallace – Lucas Oil Products Chevrolet
25. #27 Kirk Shelmerdine – Freddie B’s Ford
26. #89 Morgan Shepherd – Victory in Jesus/Red Line Oil Dodge
27. #10 Scott Riggs – Valvoline Chevrolet
28. #11 Jason Leffler – FedEx Ground Chevrolet
Race Results – Nextel Open
01. #25 Brian Vickers – GMAC/ditech.com Chevrolet
02. #0 Mike Bliss – NetZero Best Buy Chevrolet
03. #77 Travis Kvapil – Dodge Kodak/Jasper Engines Dodge
04. #5 Kyle Busch – Kellogg’s Chevrolet
05. #32 Bobby Hamilton Jr. – Tide Chevrolet
06. #41 Casey Mears – Target Dodge
07. #7 Robby Gordon – Fruit of the Loom Chevrolet
08. #21 Ricky Rudd – Motorcraft Genuine Parts Ford
09. #49 Ken Schrader – Schwan’s Home Service Dodge
10. #1 Martin Truex Jr. – Bass Pro Shops/Tracker Chevrolet
11. #31 Jeff Burton – Cingular Wireless Chevrolet
12. #43 Jeff Green – Cheerios/Betty Crocker Dodge
13. #40 Sterling Marlin – Coors Light Dodge
14. #42 Jamie McMurray – Texaco/Havoline Dodge
15. #22 Scott Wimmer – Caterpillar Dodge
16. #50 Jimmy Spencer – Arnold Development Companies Dodge
17. #07 Dave Blaney – Jack Daniel’s Country Cocktail Chevrolet
18. #4 Mike Wallace – Lucas Oil Products Chevrolet
19. #37 Kevin Lepage – Underdog Dodge
20. #66 Hermie Sadler – Peak Fitness Ford
21. #160 Derrike Cope – Year One Chevrolet
22. #45 Kyle Petty – Georgia-Pacific/Brawny Dodge
23. #136 Boris Said – CENTRIX Financial Chevrolet
24. #11 Jason Leffler – FedEx Ground Chevrolet
25. #27 Kirk Shelmerdine – Freddie B’s Ford
26. #192 Eric McClure – Front Row Motorsports Chevrolet (Out of Race)
27. #89 Morgan Shepherd – Victory in Jesus/Red Line Oil Dodge (Out of Race)
28. #10 Scott Riggs – Valvoline Chevrolet (Out of Race)
Special Race #5 of 5: The Nextel All Star Challenge
Date: Saturday, May 21st, 2005 from Charlotte, North Carolina
Time: 9:00 PM on FX
Pole Sitter: Ryan Newman
Style: 3 Segments, Field Inversion, Mandatory Pit Stop
2004 Winner: Matt Kenseth
Prize: $1,000,000
Running Order – Nextel All Star Challenge
01. #12 Ryan Newman – ALLTEL Dodge
02. #6 Mark Martin – Viagra Ford
03. #2 Rusty Wallace – Miller Lite Dodge
04. #38 Elliott Sadler – M&M’s Ford
05. #9 Kasey Kahne – Dodge Dealers/UAW Dodge
06. #48 Jimmie Johnson – Lowe’s Chevrolet
07. #99 Carl Edwards – Scotts Ford
08. #97 Kurt Busch – IRWIN Blue Blade/Sharpie Ford
09. #01 Joe Nemechek – U.S. Army Chevrolet
10. #17 Matt Kenseth – DeWalt Power Tools Ford
11. #16 Greg Biffle – National Guard Ford
12. #18 Bobby Labonte – Interstate Batteries Chevrolet
13. #44 Terry Labonte – Pizza Hut Chevrolet
14. #24 Jeff Gordon – DuPont Chevrolet
15. #19 Jeremy Mayfield – Dodge Dealers/UAW Dodge
16. #15 Michael Waltrip – NAPA Auto Parts Chevrolet
17. #20 Tony Stewart – The Home Depot/Madagascar Chevrolet
18. #29 Kevin Harvick – GM Goodwrench Chevrolet
19. #88 Dale Jarrett – UPS Ford
20. #8 Dale Earnhardt Jr. – Budweiser Chevrolet
21. #25 Brian Vickers – GMAC/ditech.com Chevrolet (NEXTEL OPEN WINNER)
22. #1 Martin Truex Jr. -Bass Pro Shops/Tracker Chevrolet (FAN’S SELECTION)
Winners of Previous Races in 2004 Season (Daytona-Homestead) and 2005 Current Season, along with former Nextel All Star Challenge/Winston Winners, former Nextel/Winston Cup Champions, the winner of the Nextel Open, and a driver voted in by the fans prior to the running of the Nextel Open at 7:00 PM are allowed to race in the All Star Challenge.
Race Results – The Nextel All Star Challenge
01. #6 Mark Martin – Viagra Ford
02. #38 Elliott Sadler – M&M’s Ford
03. #25 Brian Vickers – GMAC/ditech.com Chevrolet
04. #24 Jeff Gordon – DuPont Chevrolet
05. #48 Jimmie Johnson – Lowe’s Chevrolet
06. #88 Dale Jarrett – UPS Ford
07. #97 Kurt Busch – IRWIN Blue Blade/Sharpie Ford
08. #19 Jeremy Mayfield – Dodge Dealers/UAW Dodge
09. #18 Bobby Labonte – Interstate Batteries Chevrolet
10. #8 Dale Earnhardt Jr. – Budweiser Chevrolet
11. 10 #17 Matt Kenseth – DeWalt Power Tools Ford
12. #12 Ryan Newman – ALLTEL Dodge (Out of Race)
13. #2 Rusty Wallace – Miller Lite Dodge(Out of Race)
14. #16 Greg Biffle – National Guard Ford (Out of Race)
15. #99 Carl Edwards – Scotts Ford (Out of Race)
16. #9 Kasey Kahne – Dodge Dealers/UAW Dodge (Out of Race)
17. #20 Tony Stewart – The Home Depot/Madagascar Chevrolet (Out of Race)
18. #29 Kevin Harvick – GM Goodwrench Chevrolet (Out of Race)
19. #44 Terry Labonte – Pizza Hut Chevrolet (Out of Race)
20. #15 Michael Waltrip – NAPA Auto Parts Chevrolet (Out of Race)
21. #01 Joe Nemechek – U.S. Army Chevrolet (Out of Race)
22. #1 Martin Truex Jr. – Bass Pro Shops/Tracker Chevrolet (Out of Race)
NASCAR Q & A
This is an experimental feature that I’ve been working on for awhile now. I was planning on adding this in with Know Your NASCAR, but the questions that I was coming up with really deserved their own little section. From now on, readers are welcomed to (and encouraged to) send your questions in, and I’ll answer any and all of them that I get, so long as I don’t run out of questions to answer. This week, we take a look at a couple more interesting FYI facts that you may find interesting.
Q: Is the Nextel All Star Challenge really an All Star Race?
A: I think so, and that’s the general consensus among other NASCAR beat writers. The main difference between this race and the others is that this one only has the best drivers, while you’re loaded with field fillers on other Sundays. Plus, that $1,000,000 payday, plus the unique format for the event make it something of an all star race, yes.
Q: Still no chance of seeing the RaceDay Pulse of Talladega and Richmond?
A: No Race Day Pulse yet, sorry.
Q: How is the Coca-Cola 600 more important than the Indianapolis 500? Are you nuts?
A: No, not nuts, just slightly biased. The whole thing about the Indy 500 vs. Coke 600 is this – the Indianapolis 500 hasn’t had a true sellout in years. They’ve had to paper a lot of the stands, which is a telling sign of just how big the race is now. Granted, it’s not like Lowe’s is free from ticket woes, but the ratings for the Coke 600 are on par, if not higher now than the Indy 500. Plus, the times have changed, and open-wheel racing is now viewed as being foreign to the U.S. NASCAR is big now, so the NASCAR race is going to get the bigger numbers. Historically, not even the Daytona 500 can touch Indy, but Indy’s dominance in racing circles has been broken in the United States.
Know Your NASCAR
This section is geared more towards international readers as opposed to American readers, who probably know a bit more about NASCAR racing by sheer osmosis. Each week, we’ll drive headlong into a facet of Stock Car Racing here in the United States, whether it be a bit about the sport itself, its personalities, or its history. This week, we’re going to take a look at what I consider to be the ultimate field for a real all-star race, and the insanity that lies therein. And, as always, I may make reference to the “modern era” several times from here on. The Modern Era of NASCAR includes everything from 1972 to the present, just for reference.
“The Great Ones” Positions 1-10
01. Richard Petty
02. David Pearson
03. Dale Earnhardt
04. Darrell Waltrip
05. Jeff Gordon
06. Fred Lorenzen
07. Fireball Roberts
08. Cale Yarborough
09. Tim Flock
10. Bobby Allison
“The Elite Second Tier” Positions 11-20
11. Bobby Isaac
12. Lee Petty
13. Buck Baker
14. Buddy Baker
15. Ned Jarrett
16. Junior Johnson
17. Neil Bonnett
18. Joe Weatherly
19. A.J. Foyt
20. Bill Elliott
“The Giants Among Men” Positions 21-30
21. Benny Parsons
22. Alan Kulwicki
23. Rusty Wallace
24. Davey Allison
25. Terry Labonte
26. Mark Martin
27. Harry Gant
28. Rex White
29. Herb Thomas
30. Dale Jarrett
“Rookies, Legends, and Those Between” Positions 31-43
31. Tiny Lund
32. Red Byron
33. Ricky Rudd
34. Curtis Turner
35. Matt Kenseth
36. Tim Richmond
37. Jimmie Johnson
38. Geoff Bodine
39. Bobby Labonte
40. Cotton Owens
41. Tony Stewart
42. Kurt Busch
43. Dale Earnhardt Jr.
Speed Addict’s GREEN/WHITE/CHECKER!
Yes, boys and girls, its time for another fascinating edition into the warped mind of a dumb college moron like myself. It’s the hottest thing this side of Pam Anderson’s blouse at the All Star Challenge, Green-White/CHECKER. You know the routine by now, so there’s no need to beat around the bush.
Green – Steve Nash
Most of you might be unfamiliar with Nash if you’re not a basketball fan. Nash, the point guard for the surging Phoenix Suns, was announced just last week as the MVP of the National Basketball Association (that’s the NBA for my fellow rednecks). He came under a lot of scrutiny, mostly from that jackass head coach of the Miami Heat for winning the award. Let it be known that Nash is arguably my second favorite Canadian, behind Benoit, though most people recognize him for his hippie-like hair instead of any of his merits on the court. So, how does the Canadian Nash respond to the criticism? He drops forty-eight points against his former team, the Dallas Mavericks, then follows that up with a Triple-Double (that’s having double digits in three categories, not an easy stat to amass), then drops thirty-two in the series clincher for the Suns. The man is walking on water right now, and has not only single-handedly drug the Suns out of the cellar from a year ago, he’s poised to tackle Tim Duncan (another favorite of mine) and the equally impressive San Antonio Spurs. Let the fun commence in that series.
White – Star Wars Films
Those of you that hate Star Wars better brace yourselves, because you’re about to get a real heavy dose of it in a moment. For now, we’ll just leave it at this: the final Star Wars film is playing in theatres right now, and once this bad boy hits the shelves, the Star Wars saga is officially complete. Not that the fandom will ever die down, though I’m sure it’ll be curbed significantly. This is the final hour for Star Wars, and its shaping up to be a big one. Here’s to George Lucas, who has apparently less of a life than I to actually create this zany world.
Checker – Everybody Loves Raymond
Back to our galaxy for one moment, though we’re just jumping from the big screen to the 24″ one in the living room. Ray Romano, Patricia Heaton, Brad Garrett and the rest of the crew from Everybody Loves Raymond took their final bows on Monday night, ending one of the more memorable sitcoms in American TV History. While it never quite touched the level of shows like M*A*S*H or Cheers, Raymond has taken its place amongst the holy trinity of ninety’s sitcoms (joining Friends and Seinfeld. In all actuality, it’s kind of weird now that all of the shows that I grew up watching are, for the most part, canned. Don’t forget, I’m the junior rep here at the Pulse, last I checked, so for everyone else, these shows were just the continuation of other sitcoms that had preceded these. For me, these shows were it. And if the best we can do now is Desperate Housewives, then CMT never looked so enticing.
Inside Pulse’s Official Indianapolis 500 Coverage
Before we get too wrapped up NASCAR’s second coming of Speed Weeks, there’s another race that you may, just may have heard of that deserves a little bit of attention, too. The Indianapolis 500, once the most important race in North America, if not the world, is just a week from tomorrow. Still the essential proving ground in the United States for International superstars, the field for next Sunday’s big event is filled with the usual suspects: Helio Castroneves (who starts fourth), Buddy Lazier (who starts ninth), and Bruno Junqueira (who starts twelfth). There are a couple of notable stories heading into the 500, among them is the news out of Indianapolis that the defending 2004 Indy 500 Pole Sitter/Winner, Buddy Rice is officially out of the running this year.
Buddy Rice is out of the 2005 Indy 500 due to head and back injuries sustained in a practice crash at Indianapolis last week. Though originally thought to be able to run in the 500, Rice’s injuries were worse than originally diagnosed, and Bobby Rahal (co-owner of Rice’s car, along with CBS late night personality David Letterman) made the official announcement on Wednesday that Rice would be replaced for the 500. His replacement? Kenny Brack, the 1999 Indianapolis 500 winner; the man whom Rice had replaced at the start of the 2004 season. Brack, who suffered horrific injuries in a crash at Texas Motor Speedway in October of 2003, hasn’t been inside a car since, yet Rahal and company feel that Brack is more than capable of competing at Indianapolis. “He not only drives fast, Kenny is always methodical in everything he does. That’s why I know he’s ready to do this when he says he is,” said Rahal in an interview with ESPN. [Credit: ESPN]
Danica Patrick is also making headlines, most notably this past week on ESPN’s Pardon the Interruption. Patrick, who made Indy history this past week when she earned the highest starting position for a female driver, has been more than just eye-candy for the chauvinistic lug nuts that cover the race (though she is quite hot… the word “quite” meaning “freaking”). Patrick actually has the fastest lap time run at Indianapolis so far this month, and would have taken the pole for the Indianapolis 500 had a first lap snafu cost her valuable time. She still starts fourth, and is probably one of the favorites to take the checkered flag next Sunday.
As we get closer to the green flag, Inside Pulse will keep you up to date with the latest news, highlights, and opinions regarding the old classic. For now, here’s the current starting grid for the Indianapolis 500. Positions 1-22 have been logged so far, with qualifying orders posted afterwards.
Denoted: Car Number, Name, Avg. Speed and Total Qualifying Time. Not Denoted: Car Sponsor
Row 1
1. #11 Tony Kanaan – 227.566 MPH (2:38.1961)
2. #06 Sam Hornish Jr. – 227.273 MPH (2:38.3997)
3. #08 Scott Sharp – 227.126 MPH (2:38.5024)
Row 2
4. #16 Danica Patrick – 227.004 MPH (2:38.5875)
5. #03 Helio Castroneves – 226.927 MPH (2:38.6414)
6. #27 Dario Franchitti – 226.873 MPH (2:38.6790)
Row 3
7. #17 Vitor Meira – 226.848 MPH (2:38.6969)
8. #55 Kosuke Matsuura – 226.397 MPH (2:39.0130)
9. #95 Buddy Lazier – 226.353 MPH (2:39.0437)
Row 4
10. #02 Tomas Enge – 226.107 MPH (2:39.2170)
11. #04 Tomas Scheckter – 226.031 MPH (2:39.2700)
12. #36 Bruno Junqueira – 225.704 MPH (2:39.5009)
Row 5
13. #9T Scott Dixon – 225.215 MPH (2:39.8475)
14. #05 Adrian Fernandez – 225.120 MPH (2:39.9150)
15. #37 Sebastien Bourdais – 224.955 MPH (2:40.0323)
Row 6
16. #26 Dan Wheldon – 224.308 MPH (2:40.4933)
17. #24 Roger Yasukawa – 224.131 MPH (2:40.6205)
18. #07 Bryan Herta – 223.972 MPH (2:40.6205)
Row 7
19. #10 Darren Manning – 223.943 MPH (2:40.7555)
20. #70 Richie Hearn – 222.707 MPH (2:41.6477)
21. #44 Jeff Bucknum – 221.521 MPH (2:42.5127)
Row 8
22. #51 Alex Barron – 221.053 MPH (2:42.8568)
Qualifying Order, 05/21/05 [Courtesy: Indianapolis Motor Speedway Home Page]
01. #33T Ryan Briscoe
02. #3T Helio Castroneves
03. #26 Dan Wheldon
04. #11 Tony Kanaan
05. #83 Patrick Carpentier
06. #25 Marty Roth
07. #14 A.J. Foyt IV
08. #10T Darren Manning
09. #15 Buddy Rice
10. #21 Jaques Lazier
11. #14T A.J. Foyt IV
12. #17T Vitor Meira
12A. #9 Scott Dixon
14. #16T Danica Patrick
15. #15T Buddy Rice
16. #33 Ryan Briscoe
17. #51T Alex Barron
18. #48 Larry Foyt
19. #48T Larry Foyt
20. #83T Patrick Carpentier
[CREDIT ALL: Indianapolis Motor Speedway Homepage]
Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith
Turned to the dark side, young Addict has, hmm? Better get comfortable guys, because the geek factor is about to go up. While I’m not the Star Wars fan boy that some are, I do enjoy watching the series from time to time, and when I got the chance to catch the last Star Wars flick to be released this past Thursday, I jumped on it. Be warned, there are some minor-major spoilers from here on in, so if you’re planning on seeing the movie this weekend, or if you hate Star Wars with a passion, then you should probably just skip on down to the pimps.
The Cast
Ewan McGregor …. Obi-Wan Kenobi
Natalie Portman …. Padmé
Hayden Christensen …. Anakin “Who’s Your Daddy” Skywalker
Ian McDiarmid …. Supreme Chancellor Palpatine (Badass)
Samuel L. Jackson …. Mace Windu (Apparently from the Planet “What”)
Jimmy Smits …. Senator Bail Organa, NYPD
Frank Oz …. Yoda, he is.
Anthony Daniels …. C-3PO
Christopher Lee …. Count Dooku/Dracula/Scaramanga/Sarumon
The Plot
Young Anakin Skywalker (Christensen), along with his master Obi-Wan Kenobi (McGregor) are attempting to rescue the Supreme Chancellor Palpatine (McDiarmid) from the clutches of the evil General Grievous, the commander of the Separatist Forces during the last vestiges of the Clone Wars. Skywalker and Kenobi fly their way through a maze of cruisers that at first seem to be a homage to the opening of A New Hope. After the two Jedi land, they come face to face with Grievous and Star War’s version of Dracula per se, Count Dooku (Lee). Needless to say, Skywalker and Kenobi manage to save the emperor and escape home to the Senate, where we start to see the first hints of how close the Chancellor Palpatine and Skywalker have become.
Without giving too much more away, the story flows fairly consistently from point to point, and much to my relief, the flick never really dragged at any one point, sans a few slow spots with Anakin and Padmé. Then again, I could stare at a picture of Natalie Portman all day long, so it wasn’t as bad as some of the British critics suggested. The installment actually dances around from story to story, most notably Yoda’s involvement with the Wookies, including Peter Mayhew’s Chewbacca, and Obi-Wan’s duel with General Grievous that he thinks will end the fighting. Then again, we all know why Revenge of the Sith will be remembered; this is the film where we finally see the whiny Anakin become the man in black (RIP Johnny Cash), Darth Vader. Everyone knows how the movie climaxes, since it’s fairly easy to see in the commercials that Anakin and Obi-Wan duel it out with the lightsabers. What’s more interesting is how Anakin turns to the Dark Side, and the carnage that is unleashed from there. At one point, the movie may even disturb you a wee-little bit, but it’s all good.
The Memorable Stuff
The opening sequence with Obi-Wan and Anakin flying through Hell in Space into Dooku and Grievous’ “trap” was one of the most memorable flight scenes in the entire Saga, ranking right up there with the battle on Hoth in Empire Strikes Back and the Death Star’s demise in A New Hope. The battle between Grievous and Obi-Wan near the end of the Clone Wars was actually better than I was anticipating, though Grievous never did come off as the type of Jedi-Killer that he was made out to be, thanks in part to McGregor making him his bitch, essentially. The bread and butter of this platter is definitely the duel between Darth Vader and Obi-Wan, as everything that was said between the two on the Death Star set in 1977 now makes sense. Though I’m kind of jaded when it comes to the lightsaber duels (as in spoiled by the Darth Maul/Obi-Wan fight in The Phantom Menace), the Obi-Wan/Vader war of wits definitely takes its place as one of the most graphic, if not the most exciting duels you’ll see. Also, be on the lookout for really cool “cameos” from landmarks in A New Hope, among them:
* The Blockade Runner seen at the very start of A New Hope
* The planet of Alderaan, the first planet to be destroyed by the Death Star.
* Governor Tarkin, the landlord of the Death Star in A New Hope
* The Death Star itself, baby.
* Darth Vader’s first steps! Aw… coochie coo…
* Luke and Leia make their first appearances in the series.
* Chewbacca, looking like the ass-kicking machine that he is.
* And, lest I forget, a very cool ending that sees Owen Lars and his squeeze looking out at the Tatooine sunset, a direct homage to Luke doing the same in A New Hope
The Pulse
What did you expect? It’s Star Wars, looking and feeling as good as its ever going to get. The positives far outweigh the scarce negatives, everything is bang-bang from the get go, and we’re served here with the closing chapter in what may go down as the greatest story ever told in cinema. Okay, okay, the greatest Sci-Fi story ever told in cinema. To give you an idea of how wicked this whole experience was, I caught the flick at 2:00 PM on Thursday, and the theatre was damn-near sold out. This on a day when our county’s schools were taking all their final exams no less. The now trademark end credit sequence had been on the screen for about 1.2 seconds when half the packed theatre stood up and applauded. Now that’s an experience you don’t get every day in my neck of the woods, so huzzah. I give Revenge of the Sith four and a half beer cans out of five, along with serious consideration as the second-best installment in the entire saga, behind The Empire Strikes Back.
Victory Lap for the Pimps
No time, no time to pimp! Gah! Check out previous Speed Addicts columns for the regular pimps. You know who you are.
Victory Lane
Gah, I’m late for my journey into the wonderful abyss known as Charlotte. I’ll expand more on everything next Saturday, but suffice to say, I kind of slacked off in the material this week. My bad, guys. Now go out and watch Star Wars, you damn dirty apes. Peace.
