Sorry this is late, even by my “hope to make it by 7pm even though it’s approved at 3pm” standards. It sucks… a power line goes down in the town NEXT to me and cuts out all the power to my town. Which means roaming around the town on my engine for the next hour seeing if the power came on and, in the case it did, responding to all the fire alarms due to power loss. Fun shit. Try putting on 40 pounds of gear and being outside walking around in 91 degree weather. It’s like running a marathon at 400 pounds…hard to do and your soaked like a hooker after a good nights work afterward. On with the show…
Well, nothing of note occurred last week, so this will be the shortest column I’ve ever had. It’s been a pleasure. See you Thursday…
Ok, I’m f*cking with you, this past weekend and more specifically, last night, was probably the most exhilarating period of wrestling I have ever been a fan for. You had Hardcore Homecoming, which sounded like it was fun. You had the ROH show, which sounded like a blast, even though Shane Douglas showed how much of a tool he is. Then you had One Night Stand…One Night Stand…whhheeewww! Let’s play ball!
Fuck the Raw and Smackdown Membranes this week. Yes, Cena jumped over to Raw in a shocker. Benoit went to Smackdown, the male version of Lita, he’s been passed back and forth so much. If you think how I describe the show above is crazy and stupid and wrong, try to call me out on it. Tell me that any wrestling show you have seen had more passion, more realism, more shit that we read on the internet coming out of people’s mouths than last nights show. None of you can, none of you will. From Sunday Night Heat, yes, Sunday Night Heat, it was more passionate from a fans standpoint than any WWE show. From the “Shut the f*ck up!” chants to the “You suck dick!” chants to Coach, you knew that this wasn’t a normal PPV. This wasn’t little kids with their “I AM PART OF THE CHAIN GANG!” signs. No, you had “Lita has herpes” signs that weren’t, I repeat, WEREN’T confiscated. Then the show started, as do I…
– Joey Styles coming out to a monster pop made me feel as though I was watching a convention of all the fans that care. You know, those “12 year olds that sit on their computers and bash us.” Mick Foley’s arrival just meant that WWE needed someone to keep Joey on a loose leash. Hey, if it’s gotta happen, I’d rather Mick do it than Jerry Lawler.
– “Lionheart” Chris Jericho coming out was awesome. Seeing him go old school, even with the new music, was one of those things that makes you proud to be a fan. Proud that you know what is going on, even if all the kids at home that got mommy and daddy to buy the show to see if John Cena would be there don’t. It made me proud to have logged onto the internet all those years ago and find out what the hell is going on.
– Lance Storm put it all on the line, even if I was with Joey and Mick in wondering if that really was his last match, would he really want to go out like that? Dawn Marie wasn’t hiding shit, but so what? Every single one of us that saw her still wanted to tag her. The reunion of the Impact Players brought more of that nostalgia and pride back.
– Wrestling always proves one thing true: If you were the latest one to die, you are remembered the most. Nice show of class by WWECW for the remembrance video.
– Super Crazy just got himself a job. All of us had the same two thoughts: HOLY SHIT and “Man, just once I’d like to try that.” This also showcased Tajiri in a positive light and now maybe he can be someone else on WWE TV, instead of the dorky little Asian who throws some hard kicks. Ditto Little Guido, minus the Asian thing, plus Italian.
– Yes, Psicosis should have kept the mask on. HA! Great chants from the crowd on that. Although they didn’t seem to get on the same page until the very end and Rey’s injury must’ve hurt them quality wise, this match was fun and seeing Mysterio JUNIOR have his face planted into the railing by the guillotine was awesome. Hopefully they can get it on again with more time and no injuries.
– By the way, one thing that WWE needs badly is more people flying into the stands. These days, fans want to feel as though they are a part of things. They haven’t felt that way for a while.
– My heart thought that a riot was going to break out when Smackdown showed up. Kudos to the fans who got up in people’s faces. The “FUCK YOU SMACKDOWN!” chant was awesome as well.
– Poor Joel Gertner.
– Kurt Angle admitted to sucking dick. Regardless of his “Your mother taught me how” response, he admitted to sucking dick. JBL is just a f*cking loser. By the way, I look at porn. I email my friends. I write a wrestling column and I’ll do this: Call JBL out. Yup. All of you reading this are like “Dan, you’re a moron. You’d never fight him and he wouldn’t give you the time of day. You’re not serious, stop being a dick behind your computer.” Wrong. I want to fight Bradshaw. If he wants to beat the shit out of the internet punks that annoy him oh so much, he can start by trying to kick my ass. I swear to God, he can start right here.
– Speaking of people that are none too happy to see Bradshaw, RVD with FONZIE! RVD’s promo was kind of a let down because I had been reading it for the past month, but it was great to hear him say it none the less. Rhino is in the best shape I have ever seen and Sabu, well, Sabu is the man in my book. Kudos to RVD for gutting out some pain and going balls out to put on a show.
– Al Snow calling them the “Smackdown assholes” = fantastic.
– The crowd, once again, awesome! Going to school on the Raw guys as they arrive and even Joey Styles’ line about Edge was hilarious.
– Too bad Edge’s heat cut into the Benoit/Guerrero match. It was a good match anyway, but I was a little sad to see Eddie had to stay in character. He just didn’t seem happy. That’s what a f*cked up nose will do to you.
– Poor Joel Gertner
– Tanaka vs. Awesome was the match of the evening in many people’s minds. Tanaka clearly has a pain tolerance that is second to none, even though he almost broke his neck. The Awesome Bomb over the top through the table followed by the suicide dive was just f*cking awesome. Styles’ ripping into Awesome was cool too, and it was deserved.
– Paul Heyman’s promo will be talked about for a long, long time. Don’t deny it. Paul Heyman can grab a microphone and he might as well grab your wrist, because he has the pulse of every “smart” fan and he wears it right on his sleeve. His dig on Bischoff was great. His slap at Edge was fantastic. His…his…f*ck it…what he said to JBL ranks as one of the most classic outings in wrestling history. Don’t deny it. When you remember One Night Stand, you know damn well you will remember that comment as one of the greatest things you have ever seen.
– Sandman, coming out to Enter Sandman…a picture is worth a thousand words:
– bWo, Balls and Axl, Kid Kash, Impact Players, Francine, BEAULAH
– The match was a classic ECW clusterf*ck brawl, which was great to see. More pictures, because I loves me some fire:
– Seeing old school Taz come out was a trip. I still own a Team Taz Dojo shirt. Of course you really couldn’t make any sense of the brawl with all the guys in there, but seeing the Tazzmission was cool and seeing ECW clear the ring was even better.
– Kudos to Bischoff, for what it’s worth, for taking those bumps. I kind of dug him with his “Fuck ECW!” Just because it was kind of like he was taking it with him regardless of what they did. That was cool by me.
Overall, like I said, this was the best wrestling show I have ever seen in my life. Mike Awesome, Super Crazy, and Sandman may have earned themselves jobs. Tons of people have said Super Crazy and Awesome, but I am adding Sandman to that list. Not only did the end of the show, with him and Austin together, make him seem like a big star, but in all the buildup I felt as though he was getting over with the casual fan as well. If they had some casual fans that watched this show, which I’m sure they did, he is over in their book. Just through the entrance alone.
– Bradshaw is a dick, like I said. Check out the picture of Meanie and his commentary:
What turned out to be a beautiful weekend came to end on a sour note. I guess by now you all know what happened last night between Bradshaw and myself. It’s no secret that Bradshaw never liked me from my first day in the WWE to my last. What I did to the guy to piss him off I don’t know but then maybe I never needed to know. Bradshaw has always had the rep of being a bully and a liberty taker in the ring and he also has a rep of getting away with it.
Once the ECW/WWE brawl started I paired of with Coach and I felt a punch come from out of nowhere. My first instinct was to hit back BUT I also had the issue of trying to protect the 14 staples I have in my head. I got some rib shots in the best I could but he got the upper hand with going to my face, opening a fresh wound on my forehead and swelling my eye.
All I saw was red as the blood fill me eyes and I believe it was Maven I pulled on top of me to get him to “choke” me. After he got cleared out guys came up to check on me and we went on the other deal with Austin and Bischoff and the big post brawl party in the ring. As F***ed up as what Bradshaw did, the crowd reaction had me so buzzed that I didn’t feel anything.
I got to the back and Bradshaw was in a part of the gorilla position. He came over like he was going to do something else but people got in between. He was yelling about me talking about him on the Internet. The rest of what he said I didn’t hear cause I was too busy saying, “Yo, it’s a work!” and “Dude, the business is a F***in work!!” So I did the best thing anyone could ever do in the situation and just walked away.
I got stitched up and said my good byes. A lot of the guys were pissed and asked what happened. When I told them they were pissed even more. We got home and all I have been doing is popping Aleve and icing my face and reflecting. All this happened over was me calling him a bully. Well John……… you just proved me right.
In closing I want to say thank you to everyone who ran Hardcore Homecoming Friday night. I wanna say thank you to the WWE for giving EC Dub an opportunity to shine last night. I wanna say to the rest of the WWE workers and staff a big thank you for the hospitality. It was great catching up with all of you. To my EC Dub brothers and sisters I wanna say I love you. I was in heaven seeing all of you this weekend and doing it one more time. To the fans I wanna say I love you because with out the fans we wouldn’t have been anywhere without you this past weekend. I will be going back to icing my face and ponder if I will be wrestling on this weekends 3PW show. I will probably pull off of it so I can properly heal these stitches and staples. Plus we all know chicks dig scars.
I love you all!!
Meanie seems like a genuine good guy and Bradshaw showed how much of a prick he really is. Well, Mr. Layfield, while you were backstage after taking liberties with Meanie, Rey Mysterio was wearing your hat and drinking a beer. Meanie? He was doing just fine:
Now for my closing thoughts:
Vince, think of Hulk Hogan and the reaction he got against The Rock. He became champion soon after. The he got Edged on. Would I like ECW to run? YES. But if it’s going to happen, leave WWE out of it. Fund it, run it. Don’t let WWE have any on screen interaction with it. This is your chance to truly create competition for yourself while having a leash on it. ECW is a brand that sells. You’ll see that when the buy rate comes in. Let it sell. Let it make money for you. By taking all the ECW guys off of your current shows, you can combine the brands. Cancel Smackdown and make it ECW. If you are going to do this, do it right. Last night was Montreal in New York. It is something that could very well change the industry as it is. By allowing your WWE guys onto the show, many fans that didn’t go on the internet may be logging on right now. Montreal made me log on. ECW may have just made a whole slew of others log on. Whether you like it or not, more people logging on means your business is going up. If you are going to do this, do it right. Another boom may be just around the corner if you so choose. That, Vinnie Mac, would be awesome. You can have a boom that you control fully and profit from 100 percent. Nobody standing in your way. Do it. But do it right.
– Your stockholder, Dan Hevia
– Think about it kids. Take everyone at the ECW PPV off the WWE roster and combine the brands. Blame it on UPN. You have a bunch of main eventers, a growing midcard, and some entertaining curtain jerkers. Then you have ECW. Done the right way. You saw last night what ECW could do with Vince’s McMillions behind it. Think of what we could enjoy.
Until Thursday, if I make it that far.
– Hevia
