The Saturday Report – Ranking The Canadian Idol Final Four

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One of the best wedding presents (well, in my opinion) that the wife and I got was a Sirius Satellite receiver and car kit. Why is it great? Well, for one thing, it’s great for long drives, so you don’t have to search for stations. They’ve also got hockey, football and basketball play-by-play, which again is great if you’re on the road. Oh, and it’s not yet available in Canada. Which again is a plus because you don’t have to switch stations because they’re playing Shawn Desman. Mind you, you have to switch stations when they play Ryan Cabrera and just about any mash-up, but you can’t win ’em all.

Speaking of pop music, the Jessica Simpson cover of “These Boots Are Made For Walking” is her best cover yet. But considering her butchery of “Take My Breath Away” and “Angels”, that’s not that difficult. Still, I can’t fault her singing this time around – the production guys really f*cked the track up by laying in too many sound effects. I do have to fault her for thinking that Loretta Lynn sang the song though. Well, if she’s secretly smart like some people insist she is, then she is really working us with her “dumb blonde” gimmick.

Which segues nicely to the TV singing stuff
The Weekly Singing Competition Commentary
We’re down to the Final Four, and similar to American Idol, the Canadian Idol voters have whittled away the pretenders, and left us with the true contenders to the throne – Aaron, Melissa, Rex and Suzi. So I suppose its time to again look at how they stack up against one another.

Rex Goudie – Vocally, Rex is the weakest singer of the four. But in terms of votes, he’s probably a consistent top two vote-getter. And it’s not hard to see why – with his singing passion and aw-shucks offstage demeanor; one can’t help but like the guy. Should he win the title (and I think he’s got the inside track right now), I don’t think anyone would complain. And if you voted for Ryan Malcolm in season one, I don’t think you have any right to.

Melissa O’Neil – Melissa would probably be considered the underdog of the four contestants, but that’s unfair to her. After all, she’s managed to stay out of the Bottom Two/Three for several weeks now. I’d also argue that she’s the only one of the contestants that’s noticeably improved since the Top Ten started. But will that garner her the title of Canadian Idol? It will probably put her in the Top Two, but her chances depend on the voters’ desire to see a female champion.

Suzi Rawn – Given that she sings in a band for a living, Suzi is obviously the most record-ready contender. She’s also the singer most at ease on stage. But it has become apparent that her fanbase has peaked as far as carrying her further in the competition, and that the “swing” voters aren’t as into her as the judges. At this point I’m expecting her to go home this Wednesday.

Aaron Walpole – I think Aaron’s main problem is that he loves the cheese. His singing is a non-issue to me, but he does like to mug for the camera. When he doesn’t ham it up – like last week when he sang “These Eyes” – he’s incredible. That being said, the next two weeks will be difficult for him. With Elvis and BNL themes, it will be difficult for him to stay serious, and I think that will cost him the title.

On Rock Star: INXS we saw the elimination of another woman – Deanna. I don’t think anyone was really that surprised, seeing as she didn’t really have a strong fanbase and her Melissa Etheridge/Sass Jordan-like voice was obviously a poor fit for the band. That being said I still think she was the best female singer in the competition, so it’s sad to see her go. Surprising to see Ty in the Bottom 3 but similar to Suzi on CI I guess people are tired of seeing him do basically the same thing every week.

Which brings us to Marty. We know he can do the brooding thing really well, and I guess INXS must be giving him a free pass since it was his first trip to the Bottom 3. All I know is that he sang pretty poorly, and his cover was like Michael Hutchence singing as Marty trying to sing a cover of an INXS song. If it were me I’d have kicked him out just for that. But then there was his idiot comment that he’s essentially using INXS as a tool to learn. Hey, why not insult Brooke Burke while you’re at it, McFly?

And impressively, Dave added yet another layer to his idiocy on the show, channeling Randy Jackson by “not understanding” why Marty was Bottom 3. The answer is simple – he sang poorly, people didn’t vote for him, and as a result he wound up in the bottom. The voters are never wrong. Even if they voted for Carrie Underwood.

Overall, I’m expecting a Final Three of Mig, Ty and J.D., but I’ll give my thoughts on that when we get down to four singers.

The Ultimate Fighter 2
Well, so far this season is turning out a bit like Tough Enough 2 – Heavyweight Eli Joslin quit because he didn’t have the heart, and Welterweight Kenny Stevens quit because he didn’t think he could make weight (a valid reason, seeing as someone at 190 isn’t carrying 20lbs of extra water weight). Meanwhile, HW Kerry Schall was forced out due to injury, which sucks for him. They’re promising an alternate HW for next ep, and presumably it’s not Keith Hackney.

Of those left, we’ve got an interesting bunch. Luke looks a bit like Josh Gracin but is a Taoist and seems a bit loopy. Token Canadian Rob’s claim to fame is that his cousin Miriam plays Emma on Degrassi: TNG. Marcus wears a kilt “as a tribute to his Irish heritage” (in quotes because I didn’t know the Irish wore kilts). One fighter (Joe) trains at a dojo called “Cobra Kai”. And of course we’ve got guys representing Team Quest (Josh), Militech Fighting Systems (Mike) and Rich Franklin’s school (Kerry and Jorge). It’s too early for me to tell who will win the contracts, but it should be a fun ride.

Goonies ARE good enough… well, maybe not Mouth or Chunk
Making that reference makes me feel old. Anyways, my Cynopsis newsletter tells me that Sean “Rudy” Astin is joining the cast of 24 this season as a member of CTU. No word on what role he’s playing, although “Hobbit computer geek that annoys Chloe” is probably a good guess.

Quick thoughts on a random new fall show
I really want to like Threshold. I mean, it stars Charles Dutton, Carla Gugino, Brent “Data” Spiner and has David Goyer as an Exec Producer. The problem is that one of the other Exec Producers is Brannon Braga. Now maybe he can taste success outside of Star Trek like Tracy Torme (Sliders), Ron D Moore (Battlestar Galactica) and Ira Behr (The 4400) have, but to sci-fi fans, he’s to Star Trek what Joel Schumacher was to Batman, and that’s not a good thing.

And that’s it for this week.

Kevin has been an Insider since 2003, writing on a variety of topics ranging from The Amazing Race to Mixed Martial Arts. His current hobbies include Fantasy Football, Sporcle, travelling, making liberal use of his DVR and wondering what the heck he's gonna do when his two daughters are old enough to date. You can follow Kevin on Twitter (@starvenger).