The Crucifix

Happy Labor Day to all you US citizens and Happy Labour Day to everyone else. I’m writing this in the midst of A&E’s 24 marathon that, needless to say, is taking about 24 hours of my time. So we might as well get on with this and let you get back to your BBQs…


– Carlito’s Cabana starts us off with HBK. Carlito says he admires Shawn, but Shawn should be admiring him, which leads to two classic HBK lines: “I can’t handle any more ego this month.” and when the crowd chants for Hogan: “Until he needs another payoff, he ain’t coming back.” Make this man a heel! Keep him there! Carlito calls out Chris Masters, and as they get ready to jump him, HBK comes out with another classic line: “Ya know, after 20 years in this business, you figure I woulda learned by now not to get myself in these situations.” He then attacks. Either that comment was just there to be funny or it was a shot at creative for having him in that situation. Either way, very cool. Flair makes the save.

– Carlito and Masters cry to Bischoff, who makes a tag match for the main event between the two of them and HBK and Flair. Carlito and Masters sell it well by getting freaked when he makes the match. Tough talk and scared reaction = priceless character development.

– Big Show def. Two Jobbers (That’s their team name) in a handicap match. Can’t this match be moved to Superstars or some other canceled show? Snitsky comes out and takes out Big Show with the ring bell. For what it’s worth, while I hate both of them, this is a good way to use Snitsky and Show.

– Torrie Wilson and Candice Michelle come out, looking like they just got out of a threesome with the Silver Surfer. They apologize for attacking Ashley last week. They feel so bad that they got her booked in her first match against…Victoria! Victoria gets taken out early, but comes back and whoops ass before hitting the Widow’s Peak and getting the win. Hot, but apparently she was part of a four way with the sluts and aforementioned Silver Surfer, as she has moved to silver ring attire.

– Edge is jamming with Alter Bridge before Scott Stapp blindsides them. Sorry, I mean Todd bothers them and Edge says he’s going to kill Hardy.

– Lita takes off her jackets revealing Xtreme boobs. She taunts Hardy and tells him to go to hell. He says he is, in fact, going to hell. But he’ll be taking Edge with him.

– Someone gets HBK and tells him Flair is down! Flair apparently got into a beef with every single Latino King like…ever because he looks like he has been beaten, shot, stabbed and had sex with Stephanie. Shit, maybe that’s what he meant by making virgins bleed.

– Matt Hardy and Edge battled to a no contest in their Street Fight. This was because Matt Hardy decided it would be a good idea to Side Effect himself and Edge off the damn stage. This prompted the cool “sparks and power outage” effect. They play it up with the EMTs and whatnot, with the announcers playing it as it’s real. Edge does the better acting job, which is not surprising.

– Cena comes out and runs down Angle. Angle comes out, teases coming into the ring to fight. Cena calls Angle gay, using more words. Angle runs in and hooks on the ankle lock. Cena powers out and Kurt gets tossed. Whatever. Give Angle the title.

– Tyson Tomko def. Rosey via knockout. Please don’t tell me they are using the whole knockout thing because his name is Tyson. PLEASE!

– Main event is changed to a handicap match. Well…duh.

– Chris Master and Carlito def. HBK and Flair after Flair runs in and gets hooked in the Masterlock. I still don’t know what is making the people in the back want to push Masters, but it should be fun to watch him crash and burn.

Overall: Not a terrible show. The Edge/Hardy fight was fun and I’m all for the cool effects. Victoria being on Raw is a pleasant surprise. I expect Stratus to save Ashley from the beatings. As far as Masters is concerned…whatever. But you know that Triple H was the one who jumped Flair. That’s called being a main player even though you aren’t on TV. Scott Keith would re-affirm that Triple H is the smartest man in wrestling.

– Heidenreich has not, as of this writing, heard from his family in the wake of Hurricane Katrina. He is quoted on as saying he will be going down there, armed, on Wednesday to find his family. Best of luck to Heidenreich in his journey.

– The first Friday Night Smackdown will either be pre-empted or cut to an hour due to a relief benefit for the victims of Hurricane Katrina. I’m sure that within the context of WWE history, 5 years from now Hurricane Katrina will have never happened and FNS will have drawn a 4.9 rating.

– Dusty Rhodes is now an official member of WWE’s creative team, defying all logic that may be used in any hiring process. Yes, Dusty has had some success doing the book. But I have had some success running the book in my fantasy world, so blow me biatch.

– “Captain Charisma” is no more. WWE did not own the copyright to said slogan, so they had to pull the merchandise. See, that’s what happens when you don’t OWN something. On that note, let me do a little rant. Now, our very own Eric S. cut into Scherer last week for being an idiot as usual and going after WWE for enforcing their trademark on The Dudley Boys. If that was the only thing PWInsider had to say about the situation, that would’ve been that. But, as the children over there have shown time and time again, they just can’t let shit go when it comes to their precious, OUT OF BUSINESS, ECW. So Mike Johnson puts up a column where he takes a “deep” look into the situation and how it’s just the latest example of “don’t cross the boss”. An excerpt, if I may:

WWE did nothing to create the characters or even evolve them as The Dudleys grew from a comedy deal to legitimate badass heel main eventers in Extreme Championship Wrestling. They did that with a baptism of injuries, blood, riots, and main events. When one traces the history of the Dudley Boyz, WWE can’t even claim that they took them and gave them a platform nationally as the Dudleys were headlining PPVs and according to one ECW source at the time, were involved in the best drawing feud in ECW history against Tommy Dreamer following an angle where they “broke” the neck of Beulah McGuillicuty.

Did WWE create The Dudleys? Of course they didn’t. However, WWE certainly can claim that they gave them a national platform and they absolutely had a role in evolving The Dudleys, at the very least giving them something other than hippy colored shirts. To say that The Dudleys were national because they headlined ECW PPVs and were involved in the best drawing ECW feud of all time is ridiculous. ECW PPVs, to my knowledge, never drew a ton of buys and if the angle with Dreamer and Beulah was so profitable, they might still be in business. His argument is a joke.

The Dudley Boyz name was created in July 1995 with Raven and Tazz both given credit for coming up with it in the past. Bubba and D-Von debuted in the then-WWF in late 1999. For WWE to apply for trademarks in 2003 and then receive them in 2004, almost nine years after the name was in existence, is beyond questionable. They are claiming ownership on something they never had any right to own. WWE can’t even claim that they purchased the rights to the name through the ECW bankruptcy paperwork as the intellectual properties for the Dudley Boys gimmick aren’t even listed an asset. If WWE is going on the idea that they own the names because they purchased the assets, everyone from Spike Dudley to Rob Van Dam to Stevie Richards to Sabu to Justin Credible had better be on alert because there is a huge grey area waiting to be explored as to what WWE can and will claim ownership to, which will be a huge mess in the future and a sad piece of ECW’s legacy.

It is not beyond questionable for the simple reason that WWE EMPLOYED The Dudleys. To say that they never had any right to own it is showing a biased form of journalism that has no place being called “investigative” or taking a “deeper look” at things. WWE may have not purchased the trademark in the bankruptcy proceedings but it sure as hell filed for them afterward while they lay dormant. Myself, Eric, Johnson or Scherer could have all applied for those trademarks, as NOBODY owned them. If The Dudleys were so concerned about the name, they should have gone out of their way to apply for them and trademark them. In another sense, if the children over at PWInsider were really looking out for their friends rather than bitching like schoolgirls afterward, maybe they would’ve dropped a line to their boys and let them know that they should get their trademarks. WWE is not going on an IDEA. They are going on FACTS. They own the trademark to The Dudleys. They own the trademark to Spike Dudley. In all likelihood they own Stevie Richards and Rob Van Dam as well. They don’t own Sabu or Justin Credible. To be completely honest, anyone could probably apply and get the trademarks to Sabu and Justin Credible. ECW’s legacy is OWNED by WWE. So how the “legacy” of ECW plays out is at WWE’s full discretion.

In terms of crossing the boss, Johnson puts these tidbits for us to digest…I wind up throwing up:

There is the Frankie Kazarian story, which according to Kazarian is that he refused to cut his hair when asked by management, saw the writing on the wall and was released. One minute he was being praised by management and the next he was ostracized, because he committed the crime of thinking about himself and what he wanted to do for his career. Don’t cross the boss when they tell you what’s good for you.

Now it’s the Frankie Kazarian “story”. At no point has Kazarian said that he asked for a release due to his refusal to cut his hair. He was unhappy with the way he was being used (i.e. Velocity hell) and wanted to leave. Did they ask him to cut his hair? Yeah and he refused. At no point did they reprimand him for it. This is a bad example used by Johnson.

How about Paul London, who dared question Vince McMahon about killing top rope maneuvers for Cruiserweights? London argued that the Cruisers needed the moves to stay over and in return for his passion for what he does, was removed of the Cruiserweight championship, saddled with a series of whiny interviews, and shipped home for a few weeks. Don’t cross the boss, even for the good of your own performances.

Yes, he dropped the belt. Do we know it was because of his argument for high risk moves to stay? Nope. Johnson is arguing on an assumption. His whiny interview came along with him dropping the belt. This gave him a persona other than 40-pound Ultimate Warrior. He wasn’t sent home for a few weeks, he went home to tend to family. Research before you make ANOTHER bad argument.

Look at Joey Styles, who despite having a WWE deal, still wanted to have a wrestling PPV with his name as part of the title. Well, no matter what the verbiage was in his WWE deal, he still received notice from WWE and stepped down from his project. As much as Joey may be outspoken against the company, in the end, he didn’t want to cross the boss either, not at the threat of losing his chance to be the voice of ECW in whatever form that will be in the future. Don’t cross the boss, no matter what your contract might say.

Much like the deal with the trademarks, WWE OWNS Joey Styles via the contract that HE signed. It is a LEGAL document. This is not “don’t cross the boss” it is “don’t breach your contract”. Once again, a shitty argument from Johnson, which I don’t even understand would prompt Styles to comment. Johnson’s whole article is a joke.

He went on to cite The Blue Meanie, talking about how WWE avoided legal problems by giving him a job for a couple of weeks and then never calling him. Meanie did what any human being would do and took the job. So? I’m sure Meanie is smart enough to know that any chances he had at a lawsuit, which was recommended to him by “friends” which I could only assume would be the people at PWInsider, would go out the window. He took the shot and figured if he worked it well enough he could get a permanent job. He’s not dumb. He rolled the dice and lost.

Now this…this is the gayest part of the article:

Those damned Dudley Boys then committed the most heinous of crimes in the WWE view. They crossed the boss by actually thinking they could move on and continue their careers elsewhere, having the gall to want to use the names that they themselves nurtured and developed, when WWE themselves were the ones that closed the door for their return.

Nurtured and developed. Nurtured and developed. Makes me want to shed a tear. Give me a f*cking break. The Dudleys worked those characters and WWE wound up OWNING them. The Dudleys failed to secure their intellectual property and lost said property to the company they worked for. Simple but true.

The sad thing is that Mike Johnson wasted so much bandwidth, as did Scherer, when the truth of the matter is that if they had been sitting front row at One Night Stand on WWE’s dime, they would be slinging the other side of the argument. Memo to the kids: ECW is over. WWE owns it. You built your careers on a dead promotion and no amount of bitching and moaning will get you back in the door. Most of your old friends are working the indies because WWE had no interest in them or used them for what they were worth and threw them out. Your problem is that you were never and will never be used.

– By the way, PWInsider made it a big deal when Spike Dudley lost his name as well. Well…DUH. If they took Bubba and D-Von, don’t you think you could’ve assumed that a week ago?

– Foley signed a new contract with WWE just in time to promote his new book. It seems he flirted with TNA, but realized it’s a lot easier to pitch a book at 9pm on USA than at 11pm or midnight on Spike. My bet is that Foley bleeds at least twice before the end of his tenure.

– Vader has signed a new contract with WWE to be in the Legends division. Maybe Foley bleeds for Vader? Ten years later and I’m still there dudes.

Well, kicking the shit out of Diva Search winners seems to be her calling card. She also owes me because the bids on her bikes JUMPED after I plugged them last week. So which one of you bitches bought it?

Visit Victoria at

Speaking of Victoria, it is my one-year anniversary on InsidePulse and I personally think it is time for you readers to give back. So, go here and buy/bid on this item to get me a gift. That’s all I’m asking. If you should win you can notify me by email and I will give you my address. The kind human being that does this will get a nice letter of thanks from me.

That’s just about it, 7 more hours of 24 and an attempt to mix Raw in. Should be fun! Adios!

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