So here I was, sitting at my desk, cranking out another one of these bath-tub meth jobs that my peers like to call a column when I get this:

Fingers: hey!
flinch311: hey
Fingers: column tomorrow?
flinch311: did i do something
flinch311: yes
flinch311: i thought i had til noon?
Fingers: you do!
flinch311: or am i asleep?
Fingers: if you get it up earlier, i’ll post it earlier ’cause d’errico’s on vacation
flinch311: kk
Fingers: but no rush

Of course I’m working diligently and being a good respectable member of the Manson Inside Pulse family! I certainly didn’t receive a notice reminding me that, oh, hey, there’s a COLUMN due tomorrow. Ha ha, nosiree bob!

Hey, my name is Trevor and I’m dying to know why Rage Against the Machine aren’t making any new records, and hoping your Hump Day is going as great as mine. I am now officially a resident of Toronto, although the big question of when the fun and games will end is looming. Hopefully til I’m done my school term, but who the hell knows? That said, you, dear reader, are totally allowed to start a pool as to when exactly I start whoring myself for spare change. I’ll even throw in a night’s worth of wages if you’re able to predict the correct street corner, too!

Exhibition games for the NHL start next Tuesday, and the season starts in 21 days. Rather nice that the season starts on a Wednesday, innit?


Steve talks a lot about hockey, giving you non-hockey fans a primer to get into the sport. CHECK IT OUT.

Bootleg starts pointing out some of the worst fans in sports, and, for the most part, is bang on. Can we hope to perhaps see Colorado Avalanche fans in there as the NHL equivalent to the 49ers Aaron? One can hope, at least.

Gloomchen doesn’t get that Cheap Trick will.always.rule. Unless like, Glass Tiger or something was playing, cos, they’re like really dank, yo.

Mathan hates black people. No, wait, Kanye West hates black people. What an asshole. Read all about it in the biggest bait & switch in Nitro Inside Pulse HISTORY!

And that’s about it for this week, my computer only just came in days ago so I am really behind the eightball. Onward,


– PSA: George Bush hates TiVo users. George Bush has authorised the addition of several horrible ‘features’ to TiVo, the chief one amongst them is that some programs are no longer able to be saved forever. Yeah, so basically, despite

– Simple Plan front’man’ Pierre Bouvier got knocked out by a glass bottle at the Ovation Music Fest in my current province of residence. As much as I love it when f*cking talentless hacks get their just desserts, I really can’t say that this sort of shit should be tolerated at live shows. Where the hell do you draw the line, exactly? Yeah, heckling, booing and that sort of thing lets you know that you hate the band in question, but cranking that type of shit up a notch or two leads to some very ugly situations. Still, what a goddamned wimp. One glass bottle? Matt Good has taken Hot Wheels, shoes, bottles, grenades, etc, and lived, you goddamned poseur punk rocker.

– Wacko Jacko has been bugging his musical colleagues to help him write a benefit song for the victims of Hurricane Katrina. Artists that have agreed to contribute include Jay-Z, Mariah Carey, Snoop Dogg, Missy Elliott, R. Kelly, Ciara, Lenny Kravitz, Mary J. Blige, James Brown, Lauryn Hill, Wyclef Jean and Babyface. At this point in time we have been unable to verify if Michael does indeed know that Babyface is not actually a baby. A-HOO-HA!

– After 13 years, 5 albums, and spawning some of the most godawful music to grace the airwaves in recent memory, Weezer are rumored to be calling it quits pretty damn soon. Word going around the campfire is that having been successful in getting the adolescents of the world to dress like complete and utter retards, Rivers has stated that Phase 1 of the plan was complete. When asked about Phase 2, he simply mumbled something, and then began talking about Phase 3, and the potential for profit.

– Limp Bizkit announced a greatest…mmmmrph….hits disc…HAHAHAHA! Oh, oh, man, that’s rich. Hahahah. God, what a slow week for news.

Annnnd…I think I’m gonna call it at that this week. I finished moving and am really drained, so expect a longer column next week when I get my strength back. Until then, keep fit and have fun!