The NeelDown SmackDown Zone

So I figured after last week’s Friday Night SD NeelDown, and with no sign of Carlos Zarur who is supposed to be doing his pre empted SmackDown report, I would go ahead and do another NeelDown edition of Friday Night SmackDown this week. But, again, don’t get too comfortable, this is again not permanent (for reasons I explained above), but you can look forward to the NeelDown: iMPACT edition coming soon. Very soon. Until then, enjoy the rest of the site and Saturday Night Fever of course.

Also, instead of just reading this version, check out Fitzgerald’s official SD report as he is now in his second week of reporting SmackDown and doing a grand job.

– Arkansas
– Tazz, Michael Cole

Show starts with the Benoit-Christian opening contest being interupted before it starts by Orlando Jordan who still refuses to get beaten by Benoit, leading to a heel beatdown on Benoit until Booker makes the save making it a tag match.

Chris Benoit & Booker T vs. Christian & Orlando Jordan
Booker settles in with Jordan and gets a high kick for 2. Jordan gets on the offensive and tags in Christian who gets casual offense from Booker until Christian ducked the scissor kick to no avail as he then receives a spinebuster. Booker gets a sunset flip out of the corner for 2, and OJ allows Christian to dump Booker. After Jordan beats him down outside, Christian hits a neckbreaker back in for 2. Rear-naked choke applied, Booker fights out but gets knocked down by an elbow. Christian blocks the tag and tags in Jordan who gets a high elbow for 2. Another rear-naked choke applied by Orlando. Booker gets out and nails the Book End out of nowhere allowing matching hot tags. Benoit cleans house on both men and drop toe holds Jordan into Christian. Sharpshooter applied by Benoit but Christian hooked the ropes. Eye poke by Christian but Benoit reverses the Unprettier into a crossface until Jordan bnreaks it up. Cue Booker who knocks them both down with kicks. Jordan gets a chair outside but Booker scouts it and shoves Jordan who lands into Sharmell. As Booker checks on Sharmell, Jordan attacks Booker and whips him to the stairs. Back inside, Benoit hits a pair of germans and goes up for the swan dive but Jordan knocks him off and skins the cat allowing Christian to nail the Unprettier for the 3.
Winners: Christian & Orlando Jordan
*3/4, a mediocre opening match, but it further feuled the Sharmell and Jordan feuds, and that, is worse than mediocre.

Break.

– Teddy Long and Mr. Network welcome out World Heavyweight Champion DAVE. He said that it was time to name a new number 1 contender. And to think that after all of his title run on SmackDown, JBL has been the number 1 contender the whole time. Yep, there’s a “feud” for you. Mr. Network welcomes out new no. 1 contender Eddie Guerrero, but Teddy Long looks unhappy about his pick. Eddie does some kind of bore the crowd sorrow rant about him becoming the new and improved Eddie Guerrero. He’s out to prove that he is now about love and wants to thank Batista for giving him the oppurtunity, ect. And for the love of God, we should be thanking God that Eddie’s what seemed like half hour rant is over. Batista accepts Eddie’s friendship and gives Eddie a hug.

I could have gone on to rant about that one, but i’ll just say that it was “odd.”

Break.

If they would have just ended the following match’s feud at Great American Bash I would have been happy. I just really don’t see the point in them keep dragging it on along show after show after show if MNM aren’t going to get the titles back. The ONE thing that it benefits though, is that we don’t get weekly LOD-Team Jobber squashes every week. Make that 2 benefits, Melina’s mini skirt.

Legion of Doom 2k2 (c) vs. MNM – Tag Team Championship
A “Hire Sabu” sign is seen during MNM’s entrance. That’s a little better for their sake than the “TNA is great” sign seen on RAW some time ago. Animal settles in setting Mercury up on the top rope but as Melina distracts the ref Nitro comes in with a low blow. Double Russian leg sweep gets 2 on Animal. MNM go tag crazy and Mercury gets a neckbreaker for 2. THIRD rear-naked choke of the night applied until Animal gets out and hits a slam. Both men tag out and Heidenreich cleans house. Nitro gets a big boot out of the corner and holds Heidenreich from behind as Mercury nails Heidenreich with a tag belt for the DQ.
Winners and STILL Champions: LOD
1/4*, like I said, hand MNM the belts or end it. Melina interference and disqualifications aren’t helping it out much either.

Break. God, if I see one more advertisement for Everybody Hates Chris…

– Eddie continues the Mr. Face crap by thanking Theodore Long for the oppurtunity at No Mercy, which is I guess already announced? Anyway, Teddy reveals that Mysterio was going to be his pick for the number 1 contender.

– Randy Orton and Bob Olton standing in front of a U-Haul truck which apparently hides a surprise.

Continuing the sign craze, some JBL signs included John Bradshaw Loser and JBL: Wrestling Goof. Creative, guys.

JBL vs. Rey Mysterio
Rey with new music, “Bookyaka 619”, which sucks for me. I don’t dig Rey nor Eddie’s new music. Rey does his usual big-man offense of kicking the legs until JBL clubs him down and slugs away in the corner. Rey goes for a sunset flip but JBL won’t flip and punches Rey. Rey gets a hiptoss and dropkicks him into 619 position, but JBL shoulder tackles him down on the 619 attempt. JBL with the 3 elbow drops of DOOM for 2. Knees in the corner by JBL and criss cross whips Rey to the oppisite corner knocking Mysterio down. Swinging neckbreaker by JBL gets 2. Rey starts to fight back but JBL locks in a bear hug. Rey gets out with headbutts but gets caught on a crossbody. JBL sets up the fallaway slam then but Rey reverses to a tornado DDT, both men down. Series of kicks and headscissors by Mysterio, seated dropkick, cover, JBL has the ropes though. Rey gets the bronco buster and tries a monkey flip out of the corner but JBL instead throws him down. Rey gets a dropkick to the knee and then hits the 619, springboard, JBL catches, punches rom Rey, and he drops down and hits a sloppy Asagi Moonsault for the win catching JBL off guard.
Winner: Rey Mysterio
*, pretty good stuff from both guys which made for a fun little match worth while.

– Teddy, Nunzio, Vito, Guerrero, Mr. Network in the back. Mr. Network wants all the champions in action tonight, but Eddie wants to see Batista in action, so a champion vs. champion match is made. Yes, cruiser vs. heavyweight. HEY! Did I just see the cruiserweight title? This is Friday night? SmackDown? Whoa! Squash or no squash, the cruiserweight title got mention on SmackDown, so i’ll let it slide.

Break.

Ken Kennedey vs. Jobber
Unfortunately Kennedey didn’t add much spice to interupting Chimel this week, he just did the usual “hailing from Wisconsin” thing. And, on top of that, my hopes of Kennedey emerging into at least something better than Velocity superstar after facing Booker and then London last week are dramatically shattered after being reduced to jobber squashing.
Winner: Ken Kennedey
-no rating-

Break.

Batista vs. Nunzio – Champion vs. Champion match
Lots of Vito interferece, allows Nunzio to get an early missile dropkick. But, Batista preceeds to clean house on both men and win via Batista Bomb.
Winner: Batista
-no rating-, kind of gives you the feel of Batista-Simon Dean from a few weeks ago, but what made this one worse is that they continue to bury the cruiserweight title.

Break.

– JBL consults Jillian Hall for “help” and she accepts.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton
Thankfully, Bob isn’t accompanying his son. But do I predict interference? You bet. After in-match main event break, Taker is working on a headlock. Orton throws rights in the corners but runs into a big boot for 2. Taker works on an arm wrench now and skins it over the top turnbuckle. Arm bar locked in by Taker, and then a punch to the shoulder. Another arm wrench by Taker, leading to the Old School, but Orton does one of those rare counters and crotches Taker up top. Ortong oes up and attempts a suplex but Taker punches out of it. Orton comes back with an uppercut and more jabs, then prevails to hit the superplex. Orton calls for the truck now, and Bob comes out with the U-Haul truck behind him. Taker sneaks up on Orton while it’s happening, but Orton scouts it and gets a DDT. Truck at ringside now, and they pull out a casket. Orton slows things down after break with the… you guessed it, rear-naked choke hold. Taker fights out but gets knocked down with a textbook dropkick. Taker fights out of a grounded headlock but gets slammed down. Orton goes off the top and Taker lifts the boot into his chin. Orton counters a slam and gets 2. Taker fights back with a flying shoulder. Whip to corner, snake eyes, big boot, 2. Taker dumps Orton and then opens up the casket, where there is someone who looks just like Taker in it. Orton attacks him off guard. Back in, Orton hits a cheap RKO as the ref was knocked out, but Nick Patrick runs out and pins, Taker kicks out at 2. Taker nails the chokeslam for 2 as Bob pulled the ref out of the ring. Orton then goes for the RKO but Taker counters and nails the Tombstone for the 1,2,3.
Winner: Undertaker
**1/4, a solid main event which has been a pattern on SD as of late. A bit long though, and I kind of wish they would have used some of that time and put it into some of the other matches on the card which didn’t get much of a chance.

The Aftermath: Well, besides the main event semi-solid opening contest, the rest of this week’s show was nothing out of the ordinary. However, we leave tonight’s show with a lot of unanswered questions… like who was the mystery Undertaker look-a-like and what is up with the Eddie face turn?

“Bad boys, what cha’ gonna do” is heard on my television, which means it’s time for Cops on UPN, so this show is over, and so am I. Thanks.