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This week Lost debuts…

To promote my love of that show we have a special guest…

Because nobody demanded it… and it’s really not all that surprising…

DEADPOOL: Oh Luuuucy I’m Hoooommeeeee… holy crap, where did you get your Photoshop skills, a crackerjack box!? Hoohah!

Yes everyone, I brought in Deadpool to help us talk about today’s news and views.

DEADPOOL: He sure did, and given my love of all things comics… and when I say comics, I mean wanton destruction, I think we’ll have fun. Jamie?

Alright, let’s get to it.

THUNDERBOLTS vs. AVENGERS… THIS TIME, NEWER
Link provided by Newsarama

“Get ready for an all-out super-hero brawl as the New Thunderbolts stomp the New Avengers in New Thunderbolts #13. This battle is sure to leave both teams in a bad way with long term ramifications for everyone involved.”

Of COURSE it will have long term ramifications.

DEADPOOL: They killin’ Spidey?

I doubt it.

DEADPOOL: They cutting off Cap’n America’s arm?

Probably not.

DEADPOOL: They forcing Luke Cage to sit and watch a non-stop marathon of ‘Tommy Lee Goes To College’ while having Britney Spears discuss the problems of childbearing during commercial breaks.

Nope.

DEADPOOL: Then it really can’t be that long term, can it…

Right.. well, make sure to go check out the article anyway, as the artwork is excellent. Even in thumbnail form it’s vibrant and exceptionally clean.

ENNIS CONTINUES TO PUNISH US ALL
Provided by Newsarama

“The Punisher is still punishing, and as far as health goes, it’s one of Marvel’s more stable titles, and will shortly be the only title being published under Marvel’s MAX imprint.”

DEADPOOL: I want a Max title. I mean, how cool would it be. A little kid comes home with his new copy of “Deadpool: Max”, and by page three is asking his parents what ‘knuckle deep’ means.

…yeeaahh… well anyway, the article lets us know things we already did. Ennis knows Punisher. Ennis knows well written extreme situations. Ennis is not going to leave Punisher until someone finds him and rips it from him. In the future ‘Slavers’ storyline (which I believe just started) – Frank Castle is going to have to deal with what happens when one of your villains is a cop. An interesting idea.

DEADPOOL: Umm… easy enough, Mr. Happy Bullet.

What about the moral implications Wade?

DEADPOOL: I know those words.. just not in that order..

TIME FOR THE OCTOBER PREVIEWS!
Provided by Newsarama

AMAZING FANTASY #13
Her name was… Vegas… wait a second. VEGAS IS A DUDE?! That bothers me, as with a name like Vegas I was expecting another of the Amazing Fantasy hot-teens. I expected a sly cardshark type of girl, or possibly a female Gambit, or a con artist. Instead it’s a guy who he will probably turn out to be all of those things.

DEADPOOL: You feel odd.. I already started writing Vegas/Scorpion fanfiction.. now it’s all… ewwww

Fantastic Four/Iron Man: Big In Japan
Take a glance at that last page. They are chibi! (A thingy in Anime/Manga where the characters end up having big heads and child bodies.) I really hope this book ends up being as tongue and cheek as it looks. If it takes itself seriously in anyway shape or form, I can’t see it having any staying power. It could in fact, be quite a fun story though.

DEADPOOL: Aww man, Sue Fantastic looks all hot as a midget… have to get writing that Midget Sue/Galactus fic…

Marvel Monsters: Devil Dinosaur
DEADPOOL: You are, in fact, kidding me right?

Nope, it’s legit.

DEADPOOL: Does anyone REMEMBER Devil Dinosaur?!

Probably not, but the big hype of bringing back some of the old 70’s titles is alive and well. I for one am looking forward to it, and as a gimmicky kind of title, it should be done well. Written by The Goon’s Eric Powell, it should be a fun throwaway.

DEADPOOL: You said throwaway.. I didn’t.

QUICKSILVER IS A BIG BAD SUNUVAN’EM’
Provided by Newsarama

“I’m told that I can say it’s an important spinoff from House of M,” Hine said.

DEADPOOL: What’s House of M?

Don’t you worry your pretty little head. Your bit in it wasn’t as important.

DEADPOOL: Bite your tongue… you think I’m pretty?

So Son of M is obviously about Quicksilver, and it seems that he’s got some problems as House of M comes to an end. If you skim through the commentary, the rumor mill speaks that he seems to not only be homeless, but possibly powerless. I say that he probably isn’t actually powerless. The cover, as shown below, has people rushing by him. My guess that’s just a neat juxtaposition to his own abilities.

DEADPOOL: How about a book where we find out how he originally got the name Quicksilver? I see it now.. he’s hanging out with Rusty and Skids, and learn in a spread page what an X-Factor initiation right was.

Are you trying to insinuate something lewd?

DEADPOOL: Insinuate – baby, you are soaking in it.

Here’s that image for you. Written by David Hine (District X), I have faith.

Okay, Wade, we’re in the home stretch and all you have offered this column is disgusting references to the sexual exploits of you and the characters of the Marvel Universe. I’m sure my readers are quite sick of it.

DEADPOOL: For every single reader that I get to vomit in their mouth a little – the more it makes me whole. It’s like when you clap for Peter Pan to make him a real boy…

I think you are a bit confused.

DEADPOOL: Trust me on this one, I always get my Narnia references right…

THE COMIC MOVIE CORNER
Provided by Comic Book Resources

=Black Panther=

Wesley Snipes was hanging out in Nigeria, doing some work. Someone asked him if he was there to work on Black Panther. He said, no, but that’s a good idea. Inane bit of knowledge – but it reminds us that Snipes is slated to be a part of that movie. I had forgotten.

DEADPOOL: Ever play roulette, Hatton?

Yes, wh–

DEADPOOL: ALWAYS BET ON BLACK! I always wanted to say that…

=Ultimate Avengers=

“…the direct-to-DVD animated feature will be released February 21st, 2006.”

=X-3=

Added to the list of possible visible mutants is Omega Red, Gauntlet, and Multiple Man. Making this movie now have more mutants in it than the House of M. I assume these are all one shot cameos, but I still think we are going to find that this movie sacrifices story for geek obscurity.

Rumor also has it that a fight scene includes Jamie Maddox (Multiple Man) – so we’ll see.

=FANTASTIC FOUR 2=

“Fox is moving forward on a sequel to Fantastic Four, that film made lot’s of money and will make loads more with the DVD release, we have been told to expect to start shooting next year”

You know – praise that honesty right there. It wasn’t the suckbomb I expected it to be, but god knows it wasn’t Spider-Man.

DEADPOOL: Or Rollerbabies for that matter..

=Spider-Man 3=

Seems Danny Elfman is off the project. After a long string of problems between him and Sam Raimi, not only is he not working on this project, but he doesn’t seem to want to work with Raimi ever again.

DEADPOOL: I hate it when friends fight..

Really?

DEADPOOL: No.

Teeny, Weeny Reviews

FRANKLIN RICHARDS: SON OF A GENIUS
DEADPOOL: So if it was about Franklin being Sue’s kid, it would be Son Of A Bi–

Leave it alone Wilson. This book was actually LOTS of fun. It wasn’t serious, it wasn’t anything other than fun. A good book to hand off to a kid. Because dammit, kids should be reading comics..

GRAVITY #4
McKeever.. Oh McKeever – with a very strong nod to Spider-Man, Gravity has shown itself to be one of the most honest portrayals of teenage life as I’ve seen it. The kid just reaks of ‘real’ – even though it is in such a vaguely veiled way as a superhero book. If you aren’t reading Gravity, you should pick up the mini-trade that comes out of it.

MUTOPIA X #3
Maybe it’s because I’m so used to the grim and gritty District X, but it seems at times that Hine is fighting his original story. Maybe that’s the entire intent of the book, that these people’s worlds have been drastically changed, but the inherent person within them is the same. It’s a great read, no doubt, and I think maybe I just really miss District X.

PULSE #11
Moving into the ‘She’s Havin’ A Baby’ story arc – the book is fun, and this issue almost is poigniant really. It gives quite an insight into the minds of mothers, which everybody knows Bendis has all of the knowledge of in the world.

DEADPOOL: Was that sarcasm?

Oh, completely. It’s not a bad book at all, and Bendis seems to cover the issues very well – just thought it was funny that he writes the estrogen laden ladies club.

ULTIMATE X-MEN #63
Continuing along the love, we have Vaughan, my current writing God. The continued epic of Scott & Alex & Polaris. The big twist at the end…

DEADPOOL: ROSEBUD’S THE SLED!

..I’m not telling.

X-MEN #175
I’ll admit it.. I didn’t read it yet.

IN CLOSETORIUM!

So! That’s that. It was a light news week, so Pool got to come visit. You enjoy him?

DEADPOOL: If your reader doesn’t – I know where he lives.

Thanks everyone.. we’ll see you next week.

DEADPOOL: Bite me!