The SmarK Rant for Prison Break – Episode 5

The SmarK Rant for Prison Break – Episode Five

“English, Fitz and Percy”

“I thought your cousin was stepping out with your girl?”
“That’s my other cousin, but thanks for bringing that up, jackass.”
– Sucre deals with stress in the best way he knows how.

So last week the Secret Service jerks discovered the relationship between Mike and Lincoln, and thus put in for his transfer to another prison. We start out with Warden Pope denying that transfer, so Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum resort to a little old fashioned blackmail to make their point. Apparently a dead body in Toledo figures into the Pope’s life somehow.

The breakout gang assembles during work detail — Mike, Linc, Sucre and Abruzzi — and this week’s tattoo is “English / Fitz / Percy”, one of which has to be dealt with. What they are, we don’t know yet. That’s what I like about this show — it happily plots way ahead of the viewer and makes you catch up with it, instead of dumbing everything down with exposition.

Mike learns that his transfer is coming up and tries to head it off by explaining to the Pope that yes, he is Linc’s brother, but no go. That dead body in Toledo is just hanging too heavy over Pope’s head.

Linc bemoans being given false hope, and we get a flashback showing them mourning their recently dead mother, back when they were kids. So that’s why they have different names — they were probably adopted by different families.

Back out in the world again, as Veronica and the Project Justice lawyer examine the tape of Linc killing someone, but it’s looking more like a fake to them all the time. It seems, however, that you need something called “evidence” to get anywhere in the courts. I don’t know if she’s supposed to be written this dumb or what, but Veronica is really the weak link in this show, and every time the show goes outside the prison and we get another scene of someone explaining everything to her in detail, the show grinds to a halt. Frankly, I don’t care if Lincoln is guilty or not, the drama is in the prison break.

Mike consults with DB Cooper on how to block a transfer, and learns that bureaucracy is the solution to all life’s problems.

Abruzzi ambushes CO Bellick and copies a key, which is tied somehow to the English/Fitz/Percy plan. Meanwhile, Mike makes like Jim Morrison and breaks on through to the other side, yeah, so he can trace his steps to the roof. This forces Sucre to stand watch and stresses him out, producing this week’s quote.

The Lawyer Action Squad brings the tape to a big geek, who thinks the gunshot is a fake recording. But again, they need that wacky “evidence” stuff to prove anything.

Left alone in the Pope’s office, Mike uses the newfound key to leave via the back door, while Pope heads home and finds the Secret Service having a pleasant glass of iced tea with his wife. BASTARDS. Since Mike is trying to block the transfer with paperwork, they step up the blackmail efforts by revealing that the dead body is in fact that of his illegitimate son. Oh, these guys are shitbags in the first degree. Thus, Mike’s paperwork goes bye-bye. But the iced tea was really good.

Linc gets the most ironic physical of his life, as he needs to be cleared to die, and we get more backstory on him and Mike, while Pope seeks forgiveness from the priest.

The Lawyer Action Squad heads over to the courts to get the original tape and thus prove their case…but it was mysteriously destroyed in a flash flood the night before. Michael, meanwhile, makes it to the roof on his second try, but does so during head count, and that’s seemingly very bad timing.

With all hell breaking loose, we learn that English, Fitz and Percy are in fact the names of the streets connected to the prison, and that no cops take Fitz to get there. Ahhhh. And Mike uses a brilliant bit of misdirection, using the key he stole to get back into the warden’s office again and thus making it seem like he’d been there all along. Brilliant.

Veronica discovers the logical payoff to this week’s videotape drama, as the SS have stolen it from her home while they were out chasing after soggy evidence. However, she realizes that the only person she told was the guy standing next to her, and finally appears to put the pieces together herself for once.

And with the transfer forced through, Mike makes the long walk out of prison, but Pope has a change of heart and saves him at the last minute. And with that plot having failed, the Mysterious Woman’s next target is Lincoln.

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