Story Title: Red Rampage!
Reviewer: Paul Sebert
Writer: Sean McKeever
Pencils: Logan Lubera
Layouts: Lou Kang
Inks: Craig Yeung
Editor: Dave Sharpe
Publisher: The Mighty Marvel Way!
Previously Doctor Octopus (and his own giant STOMPY-FUN Super Robot) and a mind controlled Hulk (also with his own giant STOMPY-FUN Super Robot!) were working for the even more evil Doctor Doom (with swarms of remote control giant STOMPY-FUN Doombots) and after multiple tussles with various Marvel Heroes in their own Mega Morphs they succeeded in stealing the likes of the Red Ronin. But just what is the Red Ronin you may ask? Well it’s the most awesome super neato thing in the Marvel Universe. That’s what it is!
However for the sake of our readers who have not been educated on the nature of the Red Ronin, I present you with our first fact sheet.
FACT: The Red Ronin was built by Stark International to fight Godzilla! It was designed by Tamara Hashioka and Yuriko Takiguch. In Godzilla’s ongoing series Yuriko Takiguch’s 12-year-old gradson Rob commandeered the mecha and ironically ended up using the awesome power of the Red Ronin to help Godzilla.
FACT: Do you know the real reason we’re not reading House of M.: Godzilla? The Red Ronin that’s why!
FACT: Later after the robot was decapitated by Rhiahn The Mega-Monster, it was moved to the US for repairs by Star International. It was then hijacked by a scientist named Dr. Earl Cowan who tried to use it to start WORLD WAR III! The Avengers were helpless to cease his reign of violence. Red Ronin was only stopped when The Beast managed to get inside the robot and shut down his power source.
FACT: For a period of time Fujikawa Electronics possessed the Red Ronin. Agents of the Japanese Government, Clan Yashida, and The Hand all tried to steal the Ronin. The robot was activated by an agent of the Japanese government named Tsu Fwon in the confusion and later shut down by Wolverine and Sunfire.
FACT: Red Ronin is easily the most powerful force in the Marvel Universe. He stands at over 100 feet tall, weighs 23.5 tons and has an awesome array of weapons. Red Ronin has limbs that can remove themselves from his body and fly around autonomously! He can rocket-punch like Mazinger Z and wield a beam Saber like a Gundam! He even sometimes carries a giant shield like Captain America! Ronin carries his own magnetic field and fires lasers from his eyes! Ronin’s arm-mounted power blasters carry as much force as 100-tons of TNT!!! Finally we know Red Ronin is the most awesome thing in the universe because he is bright red and thus much more awesome than the Blue Ronin or the Yellow Ronin!
FACT: Red Ronin’s presence causes the little babies to cry and the elderly to die. His Awesomeness is more than they can take!
FACT: The bulk of this issue consists of a slugfest between the Red Ronin and numerous Marvel Superheroes in their own super robots. This makes me suspect that the Avengers and Wolverine books pertaining to Ronin’s earlier adventures are filled with FILTHY LIES! There is no way normal superheros could stand to beat the awesome might of the Red Ronin without either MegaMorph technology or Godzilla!
FACT: Lou Kang sadly does NOT do the main interior pencils on this issue. While he provides the layouts the main artwork is done by Logan Lubera who has a very similar art style while lacking Kang’s attention to detail.
FACT: There’s a reference to the New Fantastic Four in this issue. This is PRECISELY the kind of attention to continuity that diehard fan boys have been asking for!