Brain Spill: Fashionably Late

Okay, so I’m a little late this week. My gyno says that’s normal sometimes. And my column isn’t on time either. My gyno says that’s also normal sometimes. But I’m here now, ready for some more analysis of the stuff that makes our hearts pump and our brains tick.

BIG BROTHER 6. I gotta say, I’m disappointed. Maggie beat Ivette in an oh-so-close 4-3 vote. Not that I was going to stand up cheering if Ivette won, as I was pissed regardless of the result, but I do wish she had pulled through. Just like Big Brother 4, (and similar to Survivors 4 and 7), we had a totally awesome season, only for it to end with a fizzle. And you can’t help but think that the season was a disappointment because of the horrible ending, regardless of how stellar it was every other episode. But that’s how you play the game. Maggie, the … ah yes! ER nurse (sorry, for a second there, I forgot Mags was even a contestant on the show) takes the ultimate prize: $500,000. And since no one watches Big Brother, she won’t be hit up by paparazzi. Maggie did nothing the whole game, and in a season where power players kept taking each other out, nothing is something.

AMAZING RACE. I taped it. Impressions next week.

FOX SUNDAY. The only reason to watch Fox. And if not for reality TV, this would be the only reason to use a television. Keep watching it.

NFL. This will be quick for you non-fans out there. Anyone who knows me knows that I love the Colts, and it’s almost scary to know that defense is their strongest point. So good job, I guess. Also, are the Bengals tied for the best record in the LEAGUE? I think they are, as are the Bucs. This is why the NFL is the best professional sports league in the world – no matter how good/bad you were the year before, that don’t mean nuttin’ this year.

SURVIVOR. What you probably tuned in for. I never like the second episode of Survivor. Of all seasons I’ve watched, I can’t think of a single good second episode. The only possible exception is when Eliza, in Vanuatu, was doomed, and decided to join the old folks in voting out Dolly. But even that was lukewarm, at best. That’s just something about Survivor that has been the way it’s been. This season is no exception. Yeah, we get a little more plot/player development, but it’s kinda mediocre (I’m reminded of the Family Guy when they go to Purgatory, and it’s described as ‘kinda so-so). Sorry, I had to.

Most of what I noticed about this episode was the players themselves, so don’t be surprised if I head into the rundown soon. I will make a few minor notes about this “meh” episode.

Tribe difference. I can’t help but feel that Nakum is the totally dominant tribe here. And I think by a lot. I get a really good tribe vibe from them, almost in Tagi, Chuay Gahn, or Koror proportions. They’ve got the brains, and a little bit of brute. But more importantly than either of those is VARIETY. They’ve got a mom and a dad, some kids, a couple cool aunts, and a “okay guys, let’s get it together for the challenge” mentality. On Yaxha, you’ve got the “okay kids, time to get up at 4am to go fishing” psychopath dad, the FRANTIC cheerleading squad, two old people who seem really insignificant, and the one sane daughter, who knows everything that’s going on, and stands out (to onlookers) because of her normalcy, and yet still does nothing because that would make her stand out in a crowd of these loonies. Stephenie has become Daria Morgandorfer. Only Steph is hot. The similarities are uncanny. Watch next episode with the Daria reference in mind, and you’ll totally see what I mean.

So what does this mean? I’m not sure. I personally think that Nakum is going to be the dominant tribe. That is not to say that Yaxha won’t put up a fight. It just means that of what I’ve seen, Yaxha has been unimpressive. But time will tell who’s good (Look at the NY Yankees horrible start to the season, and now they’re first in their division). And the tribe itself doesn’t need to be awesome; a few key power players could be all you need.

So with that in mind, time for the rundown. The rundown does favor Nakum, simply because I think they’re more equipped for success at the time, so one of their own is more likely to win. At least, that goes for the current status of things. One other note: we’re at the point where we’ve seen enough of the Survivors in action that their pre-show bio is becoming more meaningless. In a few cases, I had to judge using that, but only due to the lack of airtime for some. Let’s get this started.

In Memoriam:
18- Jim Lynch
17- Morgan McDevitt (8). Morgan got called out on her lack of everything around camp. I still hold to the hunch that she could have caused trouble if she wanted to. But in Survivor, you have to be able to adapt, and it looks like in her tribe, doing nothing around camp make her stick out in a negative way. Too bad. Other than that, not much else to discuss about her.
16- Amy O’Hara (15)
15- Lydia Morales (16)
There’s still the physical factor. Both women are at the bottom for solely that reason. The only reason Lydia is up one is because the tribe did target her once, and might not want to do it twice in a row. I don’t know what she did to save herself (if anything at all), but that slight edge is enough to give her a slight edge over Amy in the rundown.

14- Gary Hogeboom (14) He denied his past, WHEN CALLED ON IT! He could have easily said “yeah, I wanted to hide it because I didn’t know if you guys would think I was a threat.” But no, he’s still just Gary Hawkins, the scumbag with a crappy job and a tendency for untruths. What puzzles me most was that his Yaxha tribemates weren’t demanding answers from him; they were just curious. They will find out somehow (perhaps in a tribe switch), and then he’s out. Credibility will be shot, and he may end up as a threat on his new tribe. Have fun with that EX- NFL QB. Yeah, his CURRENT job is EX-something. I think he’s a carpenter, because this guy sure knows a thing or two about tools. The only reason he’s not #16 is because it appears his tribe likes him because of his physical skills and leadership. Normally, this is awesome at this stage in the game, but because of his asterisk, nope.

13- Blake Towsley (17). At the bottom of his tribe for a reason. It seems as if his tribe was a little pissed at him still, which is never a good sign. He did show some signs of improvement at the reward challenge, but not enough (yet?). He’s not #16 this week, because he’s on the good tribe.

12- Rafe Judkins (6). He’s totally worthless in challenges. He’s got the heart to succeed on Yaxha, which may be his preservative. But if it becomes do-or-die for Yaxha, Rafe ain’t so safe.

11- Jamie Newton (10). Still nothing from him. But his physicality on the weak tribe means he might not be in trouble for a while, as his team needs him.

10- Bobby Jon Drinkard (11). The top ten of the rundown has SEVEN spots occupied by a Nakum. Bobby Jon seems like he should be an asset (and a nice asset, at that) to Nakum. But one can never be too sure, especially given his Survivor experience. I think he’s got a great game (we all know he’s busting his ass around camp, and he’s performing well, but not too well in challenges), but all it takes is for someone like Judd to say Bobby Jon’s gotta go because he’s done it already, and Bobby Jon could be sent packing. Let’s not hope so, as he’s off to a better start this time around.

9- Cindy Hall (13). What a boring name. She hasn’t done squat, but she is on Nakum. That’s enough to put her on the good/mediocre cusp. She was the first female to go for Nakum in the reward challenge, so she may be a physical strength. Let’s wait to find out.

8- Brooke Struck (5). Similar to Cindy, not much to report. She gets the edge over Cindy because I still like her a lot. She seems mediocre on a good tribe, which puts her in this perfect spot.

7- Judd Sergeant (4). He totally manhandled Yaxha in the Immunity challenge. That should be awesome, right? He’s being slightly demoted because of his Lex (TM) Trigger Finger. He snapped easily at Jeff, which was cool, but his desire to be the hero in a challenge this early in the game signals that he may lose it in a fit of rage. But he’s still good.

6- Brianna Varela (12). I said one bombshell would succeed this season, and one would go early. Looks like I may have had them reversed. With Morgan gone, and in a tribe with two older women, Brianna’s youth becomes crucial. She’s apparently loved by her tribe, and oh so cute. Her cuteness and charm could make her this season’s Survivor Sweetie.

5- Margaret Bobonich (1). No reason for the drop. The next four wowed me more. I still love Mom, though. I did notice her trying to put up with Blake, but in secret, going and indirectly bitching about him. She knows how to put n a game face.

4- Danni Boatwright (7). AWESOME MOVE, GIRL. A skinny gal called out the (not-so) hunky QB. As a snitch, she is much more valuable to her own tribe, as they know she’s loyal to Nakum. She called out Gary, because it would make her look better to her tribe, and maybe show the other side that she is for real, in a good way. Also, if she could cause controversy on another tribe, she could indirectly take out a power player. Good one.

3- Stephenie LaGrossa (3)- Still awesome. She was called out in a good way for being a tough woman. And on Yaxha, that and the fact that people are crazy about her is enough to keep her in her place.

2- Brian Corridan (9). Okay, maybe I was wrong about him. Brian single handedly changed the tribe’s vote. The last person to single handedly change the vote (and thus the game) was Chris Daugherty, so Brian may be in good company. Maybe I missed something, but I have no clue how he did it. There’s obviously something going on in his tribe that is not being shown. So he’s got to be a dark horse power player, right? For now, I’m going to say he is. I have to worry though, because he did appear to be slightly frantic or desperate. That may get him in trouble later. For now it works, and I see him as the best player in his tribe.

1- Brandon Bellinger (2). “Shut up about your whining.” This tude is coming from a country folk. He’s clearly got the mental game going, and his tude could be used to persuade others. As to boot, he performed very well in both challenges. At this stage in the game, he’s golden.

So that’s that. I don’t like to make predictions for the boot, so I won’t.

Again, I want emails, PEOPLE! I’m new at this, and want to know that people spend time reading me. Fan mail is awesome, and feel free to critique whatever you see. But if it’s not fan mail, an email of “I think you suck, and only read your column is because I like to disagree with you” or “I lost a bet, and was forced to read this crap” or “I read one, and hated it, and am reading the rest out of spite” would be totally fine.

Until next time, when we discuss the benefits of the wire twist ties, and the downfalls of the cheap plastic kind, stay cool