Every week I tell myself I’m going to get an earlier start for my next column, and last week I finally did so and what did I get? Two trailers. That’s it, two measily trailers. Shows me for trying to get on a better schedual. Luckily I have enough trailers to merit a column this week. My apologies for my absence last week.
Now to the trailers!
(Just a heads up, all new apple movie trailers require you to upgrade to Quicktime 7)
Coming Soon:
Starring: Will Ferrell, Drew Barrymore, David Cross, Eugene Levy, Dick Van Dyke
Release Date: February 10th, 2006
Plot: The adventures of Curious George, a very inquisitive monkey, and his best friend, the Man in the Yellow Hat.
Spoilers: 3.5
Analysis: Thank god they went the animation route with this one, because I don’t think I could have tolerated a live action movie or a CGI animal in a real world (I’m looking at you Garfield). Maybe the movie will spark a new generation of kids growing up with the curious George book series, that’s a god thing because these days children are consumed with Elmo and the Wiggles and that needs to stop. Casting is the only thing about the movie I’m hesitant about, Farrell, Barrymore, Cross, Levy not exactly who I would have imagined in a movie based on the beloved monkey. Especially David Cross. No real spoilers to speak of, so watch and enjoy.
Overall Score: 6.5
Starring: Josh Lucas, Austin Nichols, Derek Luke, Evan Jones, Jon Voight
Release Date: January 13th, 2006
Plot: “Glory Road” tells the true story of the underdog Texas Western basketball team, with history’s first all African American starting lineup of players, who took the country by storm, surprisingly winning the 1966 NCAA tournament title. Josh Lucas stars as Hall of Famer Don Haskins, the passionately dedicated college basketball coach that changed the history of basketball with his team’s victory in this time of innocence.
Spoilers: 7
Analysis: If there’s one genre we just don’t see enough from Disney it’s the uplifting story about an underdog sports team. They’re really riding that “from the producer of Remember the Titans” line in to the ground aren’t they? The movie came out 6 years ago, we get it, it was good now go make another good one like Miracle. Spoilers are easy to pick out since by now we all know how movies like this are going to turn out.
Overall Score: 5
Starring: Clive Owen, Jennifer Aniston, Melissa George, Vincent Cassel, Robert ‘The RZA’ Diggs
Release Date: November 11th, 2005
Plot: Charles, a successful ad exec and loyal family man meets an alluring and sexy woman on his morning commute. Flirtation quickly escalates into passion. But this casual fling turns dangerous when a violent criminal confronts and pulls them into a dangerous plot. Now with their entire lives thrown off-course, Charles must figure out how to turn the tables and somehow save their families.
Spoilers: 6.5
Analysis: Since Clive Owen is starring in this one, automatically makes it a movie I plan to watch when it comes out. The story doesn’t seem all that enticing it just has something to it that makes you think you’ve seen it a hundred times before. The trailer on the other hand is put together very nicely. An average amount of spoilers are included and don’t detract from what is trying to be told nor does it have major spoilers just pop off the screen which is the case for some trailers recently.
Overall Score: 6
Starring: Paul Walker, Cameron Bright, Vera Farmiga, Chazz Palminteri, Johnny Messner
Release Date: January 6, 2006 (limited)
Plot: Two 10-year-old boys get their hands on a mob gun with which a cop was shot. The father of one of the boys must take to the streets in a desperate bid to recover the weapon before the mob finds out it’s missing.
Spoilers: 6
Analysis: We’ll have to see how this one pans out, it’s one of those movies that can go either way. The trailer is put together wonderfully, the cinematography looks promising but Paul Walker is always a big question mark. The trailer doesn’t give much away as spoilers because it never fully explains what the movie is about. Wayne Kramer did a great job with The Cooler so maybe he can get a good performance out of Paul Walker to watch on screen… maybe.
Overall Score: 5.5
Starring: Jon Favreau, Tim Robbins, Josh Hutcherson, Jonah Bobo, Kristen Stewart
Release Date: November 11th, 2005
Plot: Two brothers discover an oblong box in the park, which they dismiss as “just some dumb old game.” The boys turn their attention away from the game’s “jungle adventure” board to discover a second game board inside with an outer-space theme and a colored path leading to the purple planet, Zathura. Mayhem ensues each time one of the boys draws a game card or rolls the dice. Facing meteors and giant robots, the brothers begin to appreciate each other and their sibling rivalry dissolves.
Spoilers: 7
Analysis: Is that Dax Sheppard from Punk’d? Oh my god it is. I like Jon Faverau, his writing, acting, directing all of it but casting Dax Sheppard in one of his movies… ugh. I’m glad they state right off the bat in the trailer the movie is by the same writer of the Jumanji book because it’s a mirror image of Jumanji, it even has Dax playing a much less funny version of Robin Williams. I’ll be surprised if this doesn’t flop in its opening weekend then drift into obscurity.
Overall Score: 3.5
Starring: Pierce Brosnan, Greg Kinnear, Hope Davis, Philip Baker Hall, Adam Scott
Release Date: December 23rd, 2005 (limited)
Plot: Pierce Brosnan stars as Julian Noble, a devil-may-care hitman who suddenly hits a mid-life crisis when he realizes he has no friends. After a chance meeting in a hotel bar in Mexico City with affable, down-on-his-luck businessman Danny Wright (Greg Kinnear), Julian reaches out in desperation to make a human connection, and comedy ensues when Danny is simultaneously fascinated and appalled by what Julian does for a living.
Spoilers: 7.5
Analysis: I always wondered what a movie would be like if they combined Analyze This and The Whole Nine Yards. The Matador shows me it was a horrible thought. Nothing looks funny here, an anoying cast with an unoriginal story. On top of that the trailer gives away most of what we’ll see in the movie. Remember when Brosnan said he was happy with not being in another Bond film? Yeah, I have a feeling he’s regreting all of that right about now.
Overall Score: 3
Opening this Week :
Starring: Charlize Theron, Frances McDormand, Sissy Spacek, Woody Harrelson, Sean Bean
Release Date: October 21th, 2005
Plot: When Josey Aimes returns to her hometown in Northern Minnesota after a failed marriage, she needs a good job. A single mother with two children to support, she turns to the predominant source of employment in the region – the iron mines. The last thing the miners want is women competing for scarce jobs – women who, in their estimation, have no business driving trucks and hauling rock anyway. When Josey speaks out against the treatment she and her fellow workers face it takes her farther than she ever imagined, ultimately inspiring countless others, and leading to the nation’s first-ever class action lawsuit for sexual harassment.
Spoilers: 5
Analysis: Theron has picked another great project, this only her second film since winning the best actress award for her role in the 2003 film Monster. Technically it’s her third but one was the made for TV movie The Life and Death of Peter Sellers (a fine watch if you ever get the chance). Not even released yet, North Country is already getting a lot of award buzz. It’s too bad after this we need to put up with Aeon Flux and the Italian Job sequel. Spoilers are in it, but most are needed to let the viewer understand the mood of what’s to come.
Overall Rating: 8
Starring: Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Karl Urban, Rosamund Pike, Ben Daniels, Razaaq Adoti
Release Date: October 21st, 2005
Plot: Something has gone wrong at a remote scientific research station on Mars. All research has ceased. Communication has failed. And the messages that do get through are less than comforting. It’s a level 5 quarantine, and the only souls allowed in or out are the Rapid Response Tactical Squad – hardened Marines armed to the teeth with enough firepower to neutralize any enemy…or so they think. The research being done at Olduvai station has unwittingly opened a door, and all hell has broken loose. A legion of nightmarish creatures of unknown origin lurks behind every wall and stalks the countless rooms and tunnels of the facility, killing what few people remain. Sealing off the portal to Earth, Sarge, Reaper and their team must use every weapon at their disposal – and some they find along the way – to carry out their orders: nothing gets out alive.
Spoilers: 6
Analysis: That first person camera angle still isn’t winning me over. Especially since James Cameron is the first and last person I have ever seen use the first person perspective on film where it was acceptable for the plot and didn’t come off as hokey. This is the full trailer and it uses most of the footage from the teaser and the only stuff that’s new are the first person shots. They also keep trying to push Dwayne Johnson as the lead when Karl Urban is the actual main character. It’s pretty obvious the only reason thy put the trailer together like this is out of desperation to get all the Doom fans who are all but boycotting the movie to go see it opening night.
Overall Rating: 3
Starring: Claire Danes, Jason Schwartzman, Steve Martin, Frances Conroy, Sam Bottoms
Release Date: October 21st, 2005
Plot: Based on Steve Martin’s best-selling novella, “Shopgirl” is a story of love in the modern age. Mirabelle (Claire Danes) works the glove counter at a high end department store in Beverly Hills, selling things that nobody buys anymore. An artist struggling to keep up with even the minimum payment on her credit card and student loans, she lives a quiet life and keeps to herself until a rich, handsome fiftysomething named Ray Porter (Martin) sweeps her off her feet. Mirabelle revels in the attention, the sex, and especially, being in love, but somewhere, subconsciously, she realizes that the relationship cannot last. Soon, she has to make a decision: will she stick with Ray, hoping that his feelings for her might grow, or does she take a chance with Jeremy (Jason Schwartzman), a musician who may offer more?
Spoilers: 5.5
Analysis: This looks like it could be a sleeper hit of the fall, the scheduled release date is right between the time studio’s put out movies that never fit elsewhere on the calendar and when they unleash their heavy hitter Oscar contenders. So it does have a chance of pulling in a big audience. There’s just something about it that’s making me look forward to seeing it, maybe because both Steve Martin and Jason Schwartzman have played similar roles in Dirty Rotten Scoundrels & Rushmore. And the talent they showed in those two could be the reason my hopes are so high. Some spoilers pop up but only a handful.
Overall Rating: 6
Starring: Ewan McGregor, Naomi Watts, Ryan Gosling, Bob Hoskins, Janeane Garofalo
Release Date: October 21st, 2005
Plot: A reality-bending thriller about a psychologist whose suicidal client makes bizarre predictions that, to the psychologist’s mounting terror, begin to come true. The shrink must race against time to save everything he loves before it disappears.
Spoilers: 6
Analysis: Unique seems like the best word to describe this one, it bounces from one thing to another while never really explaining what’s going on in the first place. The cast, directing and cinematography in the trailer are tremendous but it uses the “plot twist” idea and runs it into the ground. In the trailer alone there are 4 or 5 things that aren’t as they appear, I can only imagine how many times it’ll twist and turn in a two hour full length feature film.
Overall Rating: 5
Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Val Kilmer, Michelle Monaghan, Joel Michaely, Corbin Bernsen
Release Date: October 21st, 2005 (limited)
Plot: A petty thief (Downey) posing as an actor is brought to Los Angeles for an unlikely audition and finds himself in the middle of a murder investigation along with his high school dream girl (Monaghan) and a detective (Kilmer) who’s been training him for his upcoming role.
Spoilers: 6.5
Analysis: I love dark comedies, Suicide Kings, Grosse Point Blank, Very Bad Things among others. They’re my guilty pleasure and this movie looks so promising I’m going to be disappointed if I’m let down by it. The casting is genius with Kilmer and Downey such polar opposites but as you’ll see in the trailer they’re hilarious on screen together. The trailer gives away too many spoilers and plot points for my taste, it’s like they made a trailer going from the beginning to the end of the movie then edited it Tarentino style to seem less spoilerish.
Overall Rating: 6.5
Number One Movie At the Box Office:
Starring: Tom Welling, Maggie Grace, Selma Blair, DeRay Davis, Rade Serbedzija
Plot: A thick fog enshrouds a coastal town. The fog is reminiscent of one 100 years earlier that wrecked a ship and drowned the seamen aboard. Sure enough, the sailors are back and out to kill whomever they find.
Spoilers: 7
Analysis: This is the number one movie? It’s been panned by just about every critic I’ve read, including IP’s very own Tom Pandich who’s review you can read here.
Overall Rating: 7
And that wraps up this week.
All images courtesy of IMPawards.com, Apple.com
