Sorry for no report from last week but I’m staying up late to get this one to you. Even if it is a day late
We are in the Staples Center tonight. Show starts off with MNM showing up. Nice to see they are making a big deal out of them winning last week. Anyway Teddy Long shows up and says that they will defend the belts against Eddie and Batista. Tonights the night where the turn is coming. I can feel it.
Special Ref Hardcore Holly
Rey Mysterio and Matt Hardy Vs JBL w/ Jillian and Christian
If it’s true this is Christian’s last show. He will be severely missed by me. I have been a Peep for two years now and it’s a shame to see him go. Matt and Christian start off and work off a headlock. Matt springboards out onto both heels. Back inside Rey and JBL go at it as JBL gets in Holly’s face. Rey gets worked over and Christian gets two from a suplex. Christian cheap shots Matt who comes in and decks Holly by accident as we go to a commercial
We’re back with Rey getting a quick cradle for two on Christian. JBL comes in with some cheapshots but Rey fires back and gets a springboard rana. JBL floors Rey with a shoulder block and hammers him in the corner. Rey dicks some cloteslines and sets him up for a 619 but Christian saves allowing JBL to pull Rey outside and send him into the steps. Christian gets an abdominal stretch. Rey gets a desperation rana but can’t make the tag. JBL gets some shots in the corner and puts him up top for a superplex but Rey fights him off but doesn’t capitalise and takes a Last Call from the top but Matt saves at two. Hot tag Matt and he beats down both guys and gets a Side Effect on Christian for two. Twist of Fate in blocked by christian but he takes some boots to the face and the AHHHHHHHHH leg drop but JBL saves at two. Matt and Rey do Poetry in Motion on both guys but Matt runs face first into a big boot. Rey drop toe holds JBL into the stepss as Christian and Holly get into a fracca so Holly Alabama Slamma’s him setting him up for the 619/Twist of Fate combo for the win
WINNERS – MATT HARDY AND REY MYSTERIO
** – Boring middle portion but the ending was hot and I say keep Matt and Rey together as they mesh well together as a team.
Backstage Teddy is waiting for Eric Bischoff. Tazz is not happy
The Annoying Frog Woman comes out to introduce Booker T who’s rivaling Big Show for number of face/heel turns these days. I mean sure he wasn’t that over as a face but come on is him being a heel going to do anygood when pretty much the only guys on the face side he can feud with is Benoit when they had a whole feud with Ken Kennedy waiting in the wings that could have really established Kennedy as a main guy. Booker cuts a boring heel promo calling everyone stupid and Frog Woman annoys me with her “yeah baby check that out” comments. I mean lets take a look at this he came in as a face in 2001 but turned heel to lead the Alliance, turned face in 2002 but then turned nWo, turned face soon after, Turned in 2004 and back again to feud with JBL and turned again last week. That’s EIGHT, count them EIGHT turns in 4 years. Anyway Teddy comes out and makes Booker/Benoit next.
Booker T w/ The Annoying Frog Woman Vs Chris Fucking Benoit
Benoit has taped ribs. They chop to start and Benoit wins as he’s a chopping MACHINE. Benoit gets jumped coming back in but fires back with more chops. He knees away in the corner and hits some chops with HP SAUCE ON THE SIDE. Booker snaps his neck on the rope but Benoit keeps destroying him with chops. Don’t piss Chris Benoit off people as he HURTS YOU!!! Elbow to the head gets two. Sharmel gets involved but Benoit stays in control. Booker gets a flapjack and goes to the ribs with kicks. Thrust kick gets two for Booker and he goes to a laughable looking chin lock. Fans get behind Benoit but Booker sends him into the corner hard style. Benoit flips over from a vertical suplex and gets 3 big German Suplexes and heads up to the top rope but Sharmel provides a distraction which is enough time for Booker to move. Benoit gets two more Germans but Booker makes the ropes and takes a walk
WINNER – CHRIS BENOIT BY COUNT OUT
**1/2 – I liked it. It made Benoit look like a killing machine and so long as he looks strong I’m happy. I don’t know where they go from there as Benoit clearly dominated Booker and outmatched him in every way, which is fine if they want to book Benoit as an unstoppable force, but Booker is going to win at some point so it will make Benoit look weak when he does. Still if this feud ends with Benoit winning back his belt then I’ll be happy
Cowboy Bob Orton Vs Rowdy Roddy Piper
Yes they ARE having Bob Orton Vs Roddy Piper in 2005. I don’t want to see Bob Orton anymore and I don’t give a shit about Piper in wrestling matches. i’d get a kick out him if they just used him for Pipers Pit segments to get other guys feuds over but I don’t want to see him in his own feuds. Orton has a leather belt around his fist and gets a cheapshot in. Please make this quick. Orton gets his shots in and stomps away in the corner and chokes away. I would be embarrassed if someone who hadn;t watched in a while and saw this. I mean come on we’re not in the 80’s anymore. how about Paul London Vs Nunzio got the time this stupid segment got? It could actually give them the chance to have a **** match if you gave them a chance and who knows they might get over? But WWE isn’t about getting new guys over unless they are big or used to be famous a couple of decades ago. Anyway Randy runs in for a DQ and beats Piper down
WINNER – PIPER BY DQ
-20 stars for the amount of years ago this would have been any good. How does beating up a crippled Piper help Randy? There will be no decent pay off that he got with Foley and Orton doesn’t need the “rub” as he’s already beaten Undertaker, Foley, Benoit, Edge, Batista and others at some point. I hate this stuff lets move on shall we?
Bobby Lashley Vs The FBI
Cole seems to want to call him “The Real Deal” and I can see that sticking. Ah here’s Nunzio and he gets to continue his run of being job food for Lashley. Lashley hammers away on both to start but the numbers game goes against him and the FBI double team. Lashley fights back and kills everyone with suplexes and shoulder barges. Vito is thrown outside and Big Black Dominator finishes Nunzio off
WINNER – BOBBY LASHLEY
I don’t really rate squash matches. It served it’s purpose
Eric Bischoff shows up and is confronted by The Boogeyman who’s frothing at the mouth. I wonder if it was worth putting on all that make up for about 30 seconds of air time? Anyway Teddy is in the ring and welcomes Bischoff down to the ring. Eric says that the whole Raw Vs Smackdown thing is out of control and that they should settle it at Survivor Series in a 5 Vs 5 Elimination match. I’m all for that. Eric calls Smackdown the B show and makes fun of the fans like they only watch Smackdown or something and should be offended by it. Teddy challenges Eric to a match too and the fans like it. Wow seriously? Well okay then. I say make it a boxing match as I always get a kick out of seeing Teddy in the stupid headgear.
An Undertaker video is shown suggesting that he may be returning. If he comes back as old school Taker with the white make up and Paul Bearer with the old organ music then I will admit to getting a proper kick out of it. It won’t happen but still it would be nice
MMMMMRRRRR KENNEDY………..KENNEDY Vs Scotty 2 Hotty
I HATE the new remix of his music. He weighs in at 245 pounds this week. This whole routine is still getting good heel heat. Scotty gets his usual good pop. He’s very popular over here in England as we like loser babyfaces. I don’t know why we just do. Kennedy feigns throwing Scotty into the crowd in a funny moment. Scotty fires away with some right hands but that goes nowhere and he ends up in a bearhug. Scotty gets some chops and a super kick. Flying forearm misses by a mile but Kennedy sells it anyway. Scotty gets crotched and it’s Slam Pact time. It’s over
WINNER – KEN KENNEDY
1/2* – Pretty much a squash for Kennedy as he really needs a program right now and he could have been feuding with Booker T right now.
WWE Tag Team Title
(C) MNM w/ Melina Vs Batista and Eddie Guerrero
Melina looks gorgeous as ever. i remember reading somewhere that she doesn’t consider herself attractive. Come on that’s like me considering myself a big Dusty Rhodes fan. Eddie FINALLY has Lie, Cheat and Steal back. Eddie and Batista come out in the low rider and everything. I still felt Eddie had so much more to offer as a face so I hope they run with this as he’s really over. MNM double team Batista to start but he overpowers them and clotheslines them outside as we go to a commercial.
We’re back with Batista stomping away on Mercury. Eddie cheats in the corner but it’s a comedy spot now which works much better. High elbow floors Mercury and gets the Hilo. Batista comes back in for some pounding and a double elow. Batista lifts Brock Lesnar’s double back breajer spot but Nitro saves at two. Eddie comes in again and brings in some weapons but gets disarmed. Two Amigos on Mercury and Eddie gives chase to Melina but gets jumped by Nitro and becomes Ricky Morton (Trademark Scott Keith All Rights Reserved) I suppose I could have gone with Cheating Mexican in Peril if I’d really wanted to plagerise. Eddies gets worked over and put in a chin lock by Nitro. Mercury comes in with a neck breaker for two. Eddie gets a back breaker from nowhere and Batista uses ROID POWER on MNM. Demon Buster for Nitro and Running Power Slam for Mercury. Batista puts Nitro in the Torture Rack to keep Nitro out of the way. Melina come sin and passes brass knuckles to Mercury but takes a Frogsplash in doing so. Mercury uses the knucks to get the win
WINNERS – MNM
** – Good TV main event. Pretty much by the numbers tag action with a heat segment on the face leading to the heels having to cheat to win
Well there were 3 watchable matches this week but there were 2 squashes and that awful Piper/Ortons segment. You wouldn’t have missed much this week but had you caught the show there would have been enough to keep your attention