Just got done reading Villians United #6, the final in the series, and damn, what a great comic book it was. Probably the best series I have read in the past year. Anything with Deathstroke is good, but this one was 10 levels higher than “good.” Pick this up, or wait until the trade paperback hits shelves.
I also picked up ScabDates, the most recent release by The Mars Volta. Making the album live was a good idea, but I really didn’t find the new songs on the album all so great.
On the topic of music, SITASS delivers the goods as usual.
Omar returns from a long absence (3 months to be exact) to deliver his first hockey column since the NHL lockdown has ended. And for that we salute Omar, because hockey is good, and so is the new shootout rule.
More of me.
No iMAIL Zone this week, probably due to there being no NeelDown report for the Primetime Special.
– The Impact Zone, Orlando Florida
– Mike Tenay & Don West
– The Alpha Male (with atrocious leopard outfit) comes out and demands a title shot. Mitchell and Abyss come out next. Damn Mitchell is good on the microphone. Mitcehll says that for someone who has 2 Super Bowl rings, he sure complains a lot. Not really sure how that ties in, but what oh well. Out comes Jeff Hardy who, to add to his variety of attrocious entrances, now crawls down the ramp. They all brawl then Hardy gets in. Hardy tries taking both people on, stupid him. Brown hits him with the Fallaway Slam allowing Abyss and Brown to brawl. As they do, Hardy hits a dueling Missile Dropkick, and security breaks it up.
– Opening Contest
Samoa Joe v. Austin Aries
Joe gets a high knee right off the bat, then pummels Aries in the corner. Stomps to the head and a running boot to the face. Chops in the corner by Joe, but he runs into Arie’s boots off a blind charge. Aries gets up out of a front facelock and dropkicks Joe. Aries tries a blind charge but gets flipped to the apron, he springs right back in and hits Joe with a dropkick for 2. Joe blocks a whip but recieves kicks to the gut. Joe catches Aries off the ropes with an atomic drop then the Samoan Drop. Joe locks in a rear naked choke, but Aries gets out and hits the Crucifix Drop. Aries tries a suplex but it won’t budge, and Joe lifts him up onto the top rope where he hits the Muscle Buster and locks in the rear naked choke for the win.
Winner: Samoa Joe
*3/4, good match but a lot more capable of what they gave it.
Kip James v. Lex Lovett
James dominates until Lex dodges a clothseline and hits a dropkick followed by a back handspring elbow. James hits the Full Nelson Slam, game over.
Winner: Mr. Ass
– no rating -, post-match Team Canada hits the ring but 3LK make the save. Did they actually think THAT could save the match?
AJ Styles v. Petey Williams – 1st Finisher Match
With the PPV match coming tommorow, you can’t really expect them to spoil much here. Petey starts off with a leg sweep but Styles gets up and chops him. Corner clothseline by Styles but Petey catches his kick and gets an eye rock. He tries the Destoryer right off the bat but Styles gets out quickly. Styes sends him to the ropes and leapfrogs, then hits a textbook dropkick. He goes to the ropes but Coach D’Amore grabs his foot. Williams goes to work then and slugs on Styles in the corner. Whip to th corner by Williams and he kicks him down into a seated position. Petey ducks Style’s enzigiri but Styles then hits the Peley Kick. Damn that’s good. Styles hits a pair of clothselines and suplex into reverse DDT. Styles puts Williams on his shoulders but Petey slips off and nails a Spike DDT. Williams tries the Destroyer but Styles backs him up into the ropes. Styles catches Williams off the ropes in a tilt-a-whirl but Petey slips down and hits a Russian Leg Sweep. Petey again tries the Destroyer, but Styles drops to a knee to block it. Petey dropkicks him back down. Styles goes back in control with a 2nd rope reverse DDT. Styles sets up the Styles Clash but Petey hooks the bottom rope. The ref gets bumpbed, allowing D’Amore to try to nail Styles with the X title, but AJ ducks it and tries to Styles Clash D’Amore, but Williams nails him with the title. This allows Williams to nail the Canadian Fucking Destoryer for the victory.
Winner: Petey Williams
– Main Event 6 man tag match
America’s Most Wanted & Jeff Jarrett v. Chris Sabin, Lance Hoyt & Jeff Hardy
A 6-man tag main event at Gensis tommorow, and they give us a 6-man tag for the Impact main event? Oh well, I guess we have the Primetime Special to account for this booking. Storm starts with Sabin, who uses his X-division antics to gain the advantage. Monkey Flip by Sabin, and he tags in Hoyt, which makes Storm tag in Harris. Hoyt clothslines Harris and hits a side slam for 1. Wildcat gets a knee and tags in Jarrett. Hardy tagged in who gits a flying forearm. Jarrett misses Hardy and hits Harris off the apron. Harris then gets tagged in who hits a delayed suplex on Hardy. Storm tagged in who hits a dropkick for 2. Jarrett tagged in who chokes Hardy on the second rope and hits the knee to head. Harris tagged on who continues choking Hardy on the second rope. Storm tagged in and Hardy hits the Poetry In Motion on AMW. Hoyt gets tagged in who cleans house on AMW, but AMW double team him. Hoyt takes them down and big boot Jarrett. AMW hit a double team flapjack on Hoyt, but Sabin comes in with a dueling Missile dropkick on AMW. AMW get dumped and Hardy planchas out onto them. Hoyt then planchas on top of them. Jarrett has the guitar, but Sabin lifts him up for the Cradle shock. Jarrett slips out and sets the the Stroke, but Sabin counters it with a Tornado DDT for a close 2 count. Sabin up top, but gail Kim crotches him. This allows Jarrett to go up top and hit a Super Stroke for 3. Super Stroke, hah.
Winners: AMW & Jeff Jarrett
**1/4, post-match AMW handcuff Hoyt and hold Hardy while Jarrett has the guitar, but Rhyno hits the ring with a chair and the heels flee. They head up the apron and get attacked by Team 3D. The brawl ensues as the show fades off the air.
End of show.