The SmarK Rant for Prison Break – Episode 11

The SmarK Rant for Prison Break – Episode 11

“And Then There Were Seven”

Michael and Dr. Sara do some flirting, as a flashback reveals that Mike bought a really expensive ring for someone, and you just know it’ll prove to be a vital part of his plan.

Nick shows off his expository talents, explaining the conspiracy with the Vice-President and her brother, while C-Note and T-Bag exchange pleasantries on the job (“You mean there’s a hole in here you DON’T want to get into?”) but Mike has to go for a conjugal visit (?)…with his wife? I guess even super-brilliant geniuses can get laid, too. However, this proves not to be the case, as she’s just there to bring him a credit card. But not just any credit card, a fake card that’s pre-loaded with security codes to open a door along his path in the tunnels.

Quinn the Evil Bastard stops by the cabin of our heroes, having sandpapered his face into a fake car accident, and before you can say “About damn time,” Nick is shot in the back and it’s TORTURE TIME. Now it’s a party!

Mike breaks into the file holding his stuff, but it seems that sticky-fingered guards have appropriated a gold watch that he needed. So Mike goes to DB Cooper for help, and we learn that Tweener, the idiot white kid who thinks he’s black, is DB’s new cellmate. You know THAT is gonna lead somewhere. DB tips Mike off to a thieving guard, who sure enough is sporting a nice gold watch in the establishing shot. Mike gives him an extra-long medium-distance gaze, so you know it’s important that he gets that watch back. Quinn interrogates Nick, and we learn that Nick indeed might have ulterior motives in helping Veronica.

And sure enough, Tweener starts figuring into things, as we learn that he’s a pickpocket, and thus the best person for Mike to recruit to steal his watch back. And a faked seizure during lunch proves to be just the ticket. Although really we didn’t need the wink at Mike to get the point ourselves.

Veronica proves to be an unlikely savior, subduing Quinn with a well-timed chairshot, but really that just makes him madder. And speaking of awakening a giant, DB Cooper learns that his daughter is dying, and he won’t be allowed out to visit her until she’s dead. So he confesses to Mike what we knew all along — he really is DB, and it was his father who was locked up while he was doing the theft years ago. And now he wants into the group.

Luckily for LJ and Veronica, they’re able to outmaneuver Quinn and shove him into a well, although it’s doubtful that a caring group of celebrities will come together and sing a song for him. Bellick, amateur detective, suddenly realizes that Mike’s wife is in fact a stripper at a local club. Bellick’s interrogation techniques actually prove far more effective than Quinn’s, and she spills the beans about Mike’s credit card to the one person who probably shouldn’t know about it.

Quinn calls in Kellerman to rescue him, but instead gets buried alive as a way for Kellerman to cover up his trail of incompetence. So he’s back in the lead in the asshole standings again.

And like something out of an 80s adventure game, Mike combines the watch and his tape recorder, and comes up with a device that tells him he’ll have 18 minutes to avoid the guards once he breaks through the infirmary window. However, with 7 people in the crew and only 18 minutes to break out, somebody has to go. And one can only hope it’ll be T-Bag.