It’s that time again! It’s Chrismukkah! The greatest holiday EVER invented! Okay..so this show didn’t invent the holiday, but it came up with the name for the combination of Christmas and Hanukkah. Of course, I could be wrong on that as well. But it doesn’t matter because it is time!
This show has a lot to live up to as the previous two years..this episode has been fantastic!
Oh..and remember..to measure your smartness you only need to ask yourself one question..“did you save Chrismukkah this year? Summer did last year and look what happened to her. She is a genius now! That’s all it takes..kids. Save Chrismukkah for your family this year!
The O.C. – Season Three (Episode 10) – “The Chrismukkah Bar Mitz-vahkka”
Christmas music! And they look for a Christmas tree! Seth, Summer, Ryan, and Marissa look for the perfect tree. Seth proclaims that Chrismukkah is his greatest invention ever! May be his only invention..come to think of it. Christmas is what ever Jewish boy wants. Want does ever Christian boy want? A Bar Mitzvah! Seth wants Ryan to have one and Ryan doesn’t know about that.
Seth: “Tough talk from a guy who eats a lot of bagels!”
It appears the tree is for Johnny as Marissa asks Summer if Johnny would like that tree. Seth and Ryan talk and Ryan says Johnny is a non-issue. Johnny is the last thing on Marissa’s mind at this time of year. Except for the whole tree thing. Seth smells trouble, and you should know to always go with Seth!
“California…here we come…right back where we started from…California…here we come! Oh!!”
The gang head to Johnny’s house with the tree. The tree is for him. His mom answers the door and says it’s not the best time for this. We find out that there will be no surgery for Johnny, because his mom’s insurance won’t pay for it. So he will be done with surfing for a bit.
The air is a crisp 70 degrees outside. Perfect temperature for Chrismukkah! Kirsten breaks out the decorations, which include stockings, menorahs, and yamaclaus! Kirsten pulls out some old decorations that she and her mom made. This will be the first one without her dad, Caleb. She says the year is flying by.
Sandy: “If you want to feel better about your own life..hanging out with Julie Cooper is a great way to begin!”
Marissa tells the gang that they need a Chrismukkah miracle..so they turn to Summer, who saved it last year! But she’s got nothing this time.
Seth: “I can actually see the wheels turning.”
Seth gets the bright idea this year. It’s a bar mitzvah for Ryan! But not just any bar mitzvah.
Seth: “This wouldn’t be any ordinary bar mitzvah..wait for it..wait for it..the Chrismukkah Bar Mitz-vahkka! Spell that dude!”
Ryan says it’s crazy, but Seth says it will work because it’s crazy! Ryan can get the money for the bar mitzvah and they can give it to Johnny!
Kirsten goes to visit Julie, who is spitting Skoal into a can and watching Nascar! Redneck! She’s a Jeff Foxworthy fan as well now. She hasn’t told Marissa the news yet. Julie is letting her have her fun. Kirsten joins Julie as “misery loves company.” They watch some more Nascar!
Seth and Summer run into Summer’s dad at their home. Seth tries to small-talk her dad, but he fails on so many levels.
Summer: “Cohen..why don’t you go comb out Princess Sparkle’s tail..you know that relaxes you!”
Seth: “What?! Summer..wha..wha..what are you talking about? I wouldn’t..is the comb where I left it?!”
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Seth leaves to go do that, while Summer chats with her dad. Her stepmom left the country for the holidays. Summer thinks her dad should be bummed about it, but he is too busy with work.
Ryan and Marissa go to visit Johnny now. Johnny is watching old surf footage of when him and Chili went to Costa Rica to surf. They tell Johnny that they are raising money for him. Johnny doesn’t want to be a charity case. The rich people helping out the poor kid. He says thanks, but no thanks. He doesn’t want charity.
Seth says the bar mitzvah is still on. They are fun. Seth asks if anyone remembers his bar mitzvah, which would have been roughly 5 years ago. Marissa says that was the same day as Luke’s birthday where everyone played paintball. Of course, no one swung by the temple for Seth’s manhood event! Time for a do-over!
Summer: “Poor guy..slight of build..on crutches..he’s kinda like our very own Tiny Tim!”
They hope that Johnny has changed his mind about the money. Marissa goes to talk to Johnny about it. Meanwhile…
Seth and Ryan discuss the bar mitzvah with Sandy and Kirsten. Sandy says it’s offensive, because Ryan is not Jewish. Kirsten wants to know why they are doing this. They tell him it’s for Johnny. It’s a fundraiser..so that is where Kirsten comes in. Sandy says a bar mitzvah is a sacred event..for when a boy turns into a man! Seth scoffs at that.
Seth: “A long time ago, Mom’s team allowed Christmas to be about reindeers and snowmen and Tim Allen movies! And I would say that is a pretty religious holiday!”
The bar mitzvah is the greatest cross-over possibility for the Jews. Kirsten likes it, because they are helping a friend. It’s an honorary bar mitzvah! They are all in now!
Marissa goes to see Johnny and Johnny says that his problem is his problem alone. He gets a call. It’s private. So Marissa says she will just leave then. Johnny says he’s sorry before she leaves, though.
Memory time for Seth. Ryan looks at some pictures of Seth’s bar mitzvah. Seth pulls out a suitcase with a bunch of stuff in it. He finds a CD and gives it to Ryan. It’s Ryan’s “training” CD. Ryan doesn’t know if he can go through with this. Seth says it’s nothing. You do a few chants and “That’s What Friends Are For” plays. Who knew that song was Jewish. Seth says it’s awesome when all your friends are there. Ryan brings up the fact that Seth had no friends there.
Seth: “It’s hypothetically AWESOME!”
Ryan has 24 hours to learn Hebrew and read the Old Testament. Ryan says he will make a fool of himself in front of the whole town.
Seth: “It’s better than humiliating yourself in front of no one!”
Kirsten and Julie end up at the hospital. They run into Summer’s dad. They want to see the main man in charge as they are having the fundraiser for the hospital. That guy is gone, so Summer’s dad says he can help since he’s on the board and all. And since Julie’s daughter is staying at his house..it’s all good!
“That’s What Friends Are For” plays as we see Seth watching the video tape of his bar mitzvah. It’s a sad affair as Seth whines about no kids being there. Why do Sandy and Kirsten look the exact same, but Seth looks nothing like himself! Yeah..he’s 13 then, but shouldn’t Sandy and Kirsten look a little younger too. We learn that Summer R.S.V.P.’ed for Seth’s party, but didn’t show up. Ryan comes in and Seth turns off the tape. Ryan is late with meeting Marissa. He leaves and it’s bar mitzvah time again. Time for the “Y.M.C.A.” dance!
Marissa is waiting for Ryan at the restaurant. She then notices Johnny outside..waiting for someone. Some guy walks up to him and Johnny gives him some money. Marissa wonders what is going on and she goes to find out. Johnny is down at the beach and Marissa asks him if he is okay. He isn’t. His whole life has been about surfing, but now he can’t do that anymore. It has changed his whole life. Marissa says it can still happen.
Now Ryan shows up at the restaurant, but she is not there.
She is still talking with Johnny. Johnny thanks Marissa for being there. Marissa says they will get through this together. Johnny then leans in for a kiss, but Marissa turns and they hug. They both have weird looks on their faces. Of course, Ryan looks down and sees all of this.
We are back and Ryan is not happy! He tells Seth that the bar mitzvah is off! Seth asks what is wrong. Ryan says that Johnny loves Marissa and Marissa can’t seem to get enough of him! Ryan is through helping Johnny! Ryan says he is not humiliating himself tonight. He leaves and here comes Kirsten, who is a ball of sunshine. She says everything is good to go for tonight. This shall be the best Chrismukkah ever!
Seth: “That was remarkable timing with my mom right there!”
Summer has picked out the perfect tree for her and her dad. Her dad says that she learned well from her mom. She always picked out the best trees. That brings up the subject of why Summer’s mom left in the first place. Summer was only 13 and she didn’t know why. She just didn’t like it with her dad anymore. That was the worst day of Summer’s life. Her dad wouldn’t let her go to Luke’s birthday party, because she already R.S.V.P.’ed to another engagement. But then the news came down and Summer stayed in her room for three days. Summer misses her mom this time of year as her dad leaves and Seth arrives. He comforts Summer.
Marissa and Johnny talk at the restaurant. Marissa wanted to talk to him about what happened the other night. Marissa said there was a definite vibe. Johnny likes Marissa. It’s not a vibe, it’s the truth. Marissa then asks if everything is okay with Johnny. What was he doing with that guy? He tells her that she doesn’t want to know. He is taking care of things himself.
Sandy comes in to talk to Ryan. It’s time for his uplifting speech to Ryan. Ryan still doesn’t want the bar mitzvah. Sandy says everyone is excited about it. Sandy tells Ryan to swallow his pride and set aside his differences with Johnny for one night.
Kirsten comes to find Julie. Kirsten knows that Julie is avoiding Marissa as Julie doesn’t want to come now. But Kirsten changes her mind. Kirsten tells Julie to tell Marissa the truth.
Marissa comes and talks to Ryan. She asks about last night and where Ryan was. Ryan says he saw her and Johnny. Marissa said nothing happened..just talking. Ryan said it looked like more than that. Ryan asks what her thing is with these types of guys? The wounded..loner types. Marissa says she is only worried about Johnny. She has no feelings for him. Marissa says Johnny may be doing something dangerous! She doesn’t know what, but Ryan says he will talk to him and see what’s up.
Ryan goes to Johnny’s house and wants to talk to him. Johnny is busy in the bathroom. That gives Ryan some time to snoop around his room. He finds something. We can’t tell what it is as Johnny comes into the room. Ryan says he is trying to get Johnny to come to this party. It’s his bar mitzvah now and not for Johnny. Johnny says he will come. Ryan says great and he leaves. Johnny goes over to his bag and looks underneath. He pulls out a gun, of course. That would explain the money.
Time for Ryan’s bar mitzvah. Seth signs a giant picture of Ryan as a thirteen year old boy! Seth says the lure of Luke and camo pants was too much for the kids of Newport. That’s why no one came to his bar mitzvah! Ryan grabs Marissa by the arm and tells her to keep an eye on Johnny. He is up to something, but he doesn’t know what yet.
Julie comes to Summer’s house. She is looking for Marissa, but Mr. Roberts is the only one there. Julie and Mr. Roberts share their lies over a few drinks. It appears that Summer’s dad is about to get divorced for the second time. Julie tells him that she is living in a trailer park. She wishes she could tell that to Marissa.
Back to the party. Time for pictures. Johnny sneaks away. Marissa sees him and chases after him. She can’t find him. Marissa goes back to tell Ryan. Meanwhile, it’s time for things to start. Sandy thanks everyone for coming and it’s time for Ryan to make his journey into manhood. Only problem is that Ryan is gone. He has gone after Johnny or so it seems. That makes Marissa force Seth into filling in! Seth comes out and says Ryan forgot his glasses. He will be a little late…
Meanwhile, Johnny gets into his car and speeds off. Ryan sees him and he jumps into his car to chase after him…
Back at the party…
Seth: “And that’s how I came up with Chrismukkah. Because you can’t have the ‘Chris’..without the ‘Makkah’!”
Seth then drags Summer and Marissa to reenact the “history of Hanukkah”!
Johnny ends up driving to a mini-mart. He pulls out his gun and he is probably going to rob the place for some money. Ryan is stuck at a red light, but he sees all of this. Johnny enters the place as it’s about to close. There is one customer ahead of him. Johnny waits in the shadows. The guy behind the counter stares him down. Johnny thinks about it and thinks about it. This makes the guy nervous. He reaches down and he has a gun down behind the counter. Johnny reaches behind his back to get his gun. And at that moment, Ryan steps in as the “calming figure”. Irony. Johnny is shocked to see him there. Ryan wants a pack of smokes and a lottery ticket. HA! The guy goes to get his stuff. Ryan pulls Johnny aside. Ryan says it doesn’t have to be like this. Johnny says he has no choice. Ryan says he knows exactly what Johnny is going through.
Ryan: “Sometimes you just got the rich people help you!”
Ryan tells Johnny to let them help. Let them take care of the surgery. Some police come in and that’s their cue to leave the place.
Back at the party, Sandy and Seth sing Jewish songs! Yay!
Seth and Sandy (singing): “Dreidal..dreidal..dreidal..I’ve made it out of…!”
Now it’s time for Summer and Marissa to handle things. That means they get to sing now! It’s “Deck the Halls”! And this time everyone joins in on the singing fun. Ryan and Johnny are back now..thank god. Bar mitzvah is back on! Ryan then goes through his speech and says that “mitzvah” means any act of human kindness. The Cohens gave him a mitzvah awhile back. Johnny looks on.
“That’s What Friends Are For” is back on the jukebox! Summer tells Seth that she owes him this dance for 5 years now! All seems good. Marissa goes up to Johnny and asks if they can be friends and Johnny says yes..”friends”! Time for a group hug as the song plays. That is lame! Julie and Mr. Roberts arrive on the scene and Summer breaks off from the group. Her dad says it’s the holidays and she is glad he came. He joins the line dancing. Friends! Now Julie joins in on the fun. A happy moment as everyone looks at each other with “friendly” thoughts as the song plays in the background! Friends! That’s too funny!
And we are out until..uh..2006! 2006! Are you kidding me?!?! Oh well..see you then!
