To go along with their debut on Spike TV, TNA released 4 DVD’s, highlighting three of their biggest stars (Jeff Hardy, Raven and AJ Styles) and one highlighting their unique and breath-taking X-Division. For TNA noobs, it’s supposed to serve as the hello to the division, while for us TNA fans, it’s a nice collection of some swell matches. But does it achieve both? Well, that’s what we’re here for today.
Match #1: 20-man X-Division battle royal for the 2004 Super X Cup, Victory Road 2004
Why it’s on here: Because the DVD is being marketed for the new audience TNA is trying to lure in, and this serves as an introduction to the bulk of the X-Division and its frenetic style.
What to expect from it: Lots of people hitting their signature spots, plenty of “Holy shit!” moments. It’s not a great introduction to an X-Division match … just the people who make it up (or, in the case of many of the participants, former stars or one-timers).
The watchability: It has its moments. It’s not great, but for a battle royal, fairly entertaining. Lots of bodies flying everywhere, a Tower Of Doom spot (what’s that, you ask? Watch and find out); enough spotty carnage for even the most jaded technical purist to go “wow, that was something else”.
Match #2: Petey Williams vs. AJ Styles, X-Division Championship match, Victory Road 2004
Why it’s on here: Petey Williams had a stranglehold on the X-Division Title and was running through the X-Division like three-day old Taco Bell through a colon, courtesy of his awe-inspiring Canadian Destroyer finisher. The crowd was all but demanding the X-Division hero, AJ Styles, to come and take it off Williams. This was the result, from the first Sunday TNA PPV.
What to expect from it: If you’ve seen these two before, you know what to expect: the very best in X-Division action. Just be prepared for one thing: it’s a short match. 10 minutes, I believe, far too short for two men of this caliber.
The watchability: Not bad at all … but again, the damned length really hurts. You can see and feel how rushed the match was, and it makes me both uncomfortable … and aching for a full-length rematch.
Match #3: Chris Sabin vs. Christopher Daniels, Ultimate-X qualifying match, iMPACT!
Why it’s on here: To showcase a few more of the X-Division’s finest. Plus, it serves as a lead-in to two storylines: the very next match, and the ongoing anguish of Christopher Daniels and his failures to advance in the X-Division in general, and AJ Styles in particular.
What to expect from it: It’s an free-TV match, back from the FSN days, when they had the 10-minute time limit for non-title TV matches. So, it’s short. But that don’t mean it can’t be good.
The watchability: Better then anything you’ll be seeing on free WWE TV, I’ll tell ya that, and probably most of their PPV matches too
Match #4: Petey Williams vs. Chris Sabin vs. AJ Styles, Ultimate-X match, X-Division Championship, Final Resolution 2004
Why it’s on here: It’s Ultimate-X. They needed to put one on here, and this one has three great competitors with three great stories: Williams, the champion going on looking to continue his hot streak; Sabin, who had won more then one Ultimate-X and was considered by virtue of experience to be the favorite; and AJ, who’d never won one and was looking to both win it and take the title from Petey.
What to expect from it: If you’ve never seen an Ultimate-X before, here ya go: take four big metal pillars, and station them around the ring; from these, string high-tension wires in an X, from corner to corner. Winner has to climb the structures, scale the wires and pull down the object (title belt for title matches, a big red X in non-title matches) for the win. So, kind of a new-wave ladder match, where the ladder is attached to the ring. So, think about it … crazy bump machines, with a wild contraption attached to the ring … no DQ’s …oh yeah. Oh yeah.
The watchability: Absolutely f*cking insane amounts of coolness. The violence is insane, the bumps are Foley-worthy; it’s carnage, and it’s beautiful. You can’t ask for much better then this. Well, except for …
Match #5: Christopher Daniels vs. AJ Styles, 30-minute Iron Man match, X-Division Championship, Against All Odds 2005
Why it’s on here: Daniels was finally stepping up to the big time, taking on AJ Styles with the X-Division Title on the line. Daniels had been knocking on the X-Title’s door, and the opportunity to not only take the belt for the first time, but to do so from Mr. TNA himself had the evil Daniels salivating.
What to expect from it: Oh, man, do I need to explain this? Do I really need to sell anybody on this? If you have never seen either guy, and have no clue what to expect from these guys going 30 minutes, you have no business even reading this, let alone seeing this match. If you know, then you don’t need me to sell it.
The watchability: Hey, Dave? Dave Batista? Yeah, this is wrestling calling; I’d like to tell you to f*ck off and die, you talentless, roided-up sack of f*cking shit. Fuck off and die. But first, watch this match and understand … realize … come to grips with the fact that, no matter how much the WWE shoves your two-maneuver-moveset and your mind-numbing promos and your metrosexual poses down our throats, you will NEVER be able to put on a show 1/20th as good as this, no matter who was carrying your goldbricking, over-muscular ass. Even Angle and Benoit have trouble living up to the perfection, the absolute Flair/Steamboat levels of flawlessness this exudes. The only “car crash” matches to find are yours, Dave. Watch this and learn what wrestling is all about. Then die, you pathetic Sid Vicious clone.
Match #6: Ron Killings vs. Christopher Daniels vs. Elix Skipper vs. AJ Styles, Ultimate-X match, X-Division Championship, Destination-X 2005
Why it’s on here: Cause there were more contenders for the X-Division Title, and it’s a hell of a lot more fun to throw them into this nightmare then a simple four-way-dance.
What to expect from it: Well, the rules are different; it starts off as a tag, with Skipper & Styles against Killings & Daniels (in keeping with the stipulations that Skipper & Daniels could never tag again from December). The person who suffers a pinfall is eliminated, and the match becomes a pinfall three-way. When a pinfall occurs, the match goes to a one-on-one Ultimate-X match. Now, you may be saying “Ron Killings? RON KILLINGS?” Just give the guy a chance. There’s a reason he’s a two-time NWA World Champion, and he shows it here.
The watchability: Go back and read the first Ultimate-X write up. Change the participants, and add one more. In other words … oh yeah. Oh yeah.
Match #7: Sonjay Dutt vs. Shocker vs. Chris Sabin vs. Matt Bentley, X-scape Steel Cage match, Lockdown 2005
Why it’s on here: To show some different faces besides Styles, Daniels and Petey.
What to expect from it: Rules are like the Ultimate-X match right before it. Final winner escapes. The only stinkyness coming from this is the presence of Shocker, who was hyped as this Mexican luchadore wunderkind … whose finisher is a FUCKING SMALL PACKAGE! He’s mediocre at best, and a Konnan-clone at worst … but Sabin, Bentley and the criminally underrated Dutt put on more then enough of a performance to make up for Shitter.
The watchability: Not the best match on here. In fact, one of the blandest. A decent match, and a nice chance to see Dutt, Sabin and Bentley in action. Shocker, though … man … glad he’s gone, that’s all I can say.
Match #8: AJ Styles vs. Sean Waltman w/Jerry Lynn guest referee, No Surrender 2005
Why it’s on here: Waltman and Styles had had a falling out of sorts (I disremember why), and needed to face off. From out of nowhere, here comes the former tag partner of both guys to be the ref. Smell the drama!
What to expect from it: Well, you got Styles, so that’s a tick in the plus column. You got Death Metal Referee. But then there’s Waltman. Maybe it’s the bias … maybe it’s the years of bad performances, ridiculous character, and being Peter Brady’s bitch, but the very sight of him makes my teeth grind into a fine powder. But he doesn’t slag it here, I’ll admit. He isn’t in Lightning Kid condition, but he hasn’t been that since he went to WCW. Being Scott Hall’s little buddy has got to have SOME kind of collateral damage.
The watchability: Waltman works as much as he can, and Styles carries him as much as he can. It’s not a bad match, but the “X” just isn’t there much. More of a ground-based match and, thusly, kind of an ill fit on this DVD.
Match #9: Chris Sabin vs. Samoa Joe, No Surrender 2005
Why it’s on here: Cause the world needed to see Samoa Joe, dammit! They needed to see him go against a real opponent who could take his shit!
What to expect from it: SAMOA JOE!!! That’s what to expect, man! Samoa f*cking Joe! Chops so stiff, they cut down redwoods! Kicks so vicious, Kawada pisses his pants! A 280 pound Samoan who can out-wrestle Chris Benoit! Oh, and Sabin’s there, too.
The watchability: Man, oh man … there’s nothing better after a long day at work then to come home, sit down, kick off the shoes, crack open a cold one and watching Samoa Joe smear some poor f*cker all over the mat. The stiffness and sick spots are bound to make your stomach turn, but in a good way, if that makes sense. Joe’s gonna have his own DVD this time next year, mark my words, and it’ll sell out as fast as Styles’.
Match #10: Sonjay Dutt & Amazing Red vs. Triple-X, iMPACT!
Why it’s on here: Um … ya know … I got no idea. To show a bunch of X-Division guys in a tag match?
What to expect from it: Dutt & Red were way underrated and, since they weren’t named Petey, AJ or Daniels, they weren’t pushed. On the other side of the six-sides, we have Triple-X, one of the best tag teams to ever set foot in TNA (Daniels & Skipper, for the two of you who don’t know). Man, what kind of match might this make?
The watchability: You do get to see some Token Jobber Offense and, since it’s the X-Division, it’s flashy. The winner is never in doubt, though. Passable, but unnecessary viewing.
Match #11: 6-man battle royal for the #1 contendership to the X-Division Champion, iMPACT!
Why it’s on here: This was to declare the #1 contender to Petey Williams building up to Victory Road.
What to expect from it: A 6-man, one pinfall match. On iMPACT! During the FSN days.
The watchability: Too short to be on iMPACT! Too short for this many participants. Cut out two, and you got yourself something better. Cut out three, and you got yourself something great. But six? The match never has a chance to utilize its size because of the time constraints. Coulda been left off for something else.
And a quick look at the DVD packaging says AJ Styles vs. Johnny Devine … but that’s not on the disc. What the?!? That kind of bush-league mistake is really perplexing, and isn’t a help to improving their public image. Meh … one small mistake, I guess. I’ll allow it.
But the problem here is that, despite being loaded to the rafters with a number of good matches, this DVD only successfully serves one of its two masters: noobs to TNA. Every match is from about September 2004 to the latter end of 2005. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think the company only sprung up in 2004. There’s nothing on here with Low-Ki, no full matches with Amazing Red, no Jerry Lynn as a wrestler, no Kid Kash, no Kazarian (and, for that matter, none of them awesome Kazarian/Shane tandem) … hopefully, a volume 2 will be more of a retrospective then a “get the noobs caught up on the storylines” DVD that this was. Still, if you’re looking for some honest-to-god REAL WRESTLING, ignore Metrosexual Man and spend the 20 bones to grab this (if you can find it … it’s been sold out in a lot of areas). Styles/Daniels and Joe/Sabin will be worth the money spent.
