InsidePulse’s TNA iMPACT! Recap

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Welcome to InsidePulse’s Live Coverage of TNA Impact. I’m your host Jeremy Lambert. I hope everyone has enjoyed the playoff football and you are ready for some wrestling.

“This Is TNA…The New Face In Professional Wrestling”

A video plays recapping the past weeks.

TNA opening video

Team 3D vs. Job “Already In The Ring” bers: No point on even doing the PBP on this match. The drill is pretty simple. The Jobbers get some offense but in the end, Team 3D dominates and hits the 3-D for the win.
Winners- Team 3-D

Brother Ray gets on the mic and mentions all the tag titles that he and Devon have won. The crowd boos at the mention of all the companies. Brother Ray says that he and Devon will win the Tag Title at Final Resolution. “I would give up all 18 title runs just to hold the NWA Tag Title” Bullshit. “It would seperate us from every team, including the Road Warriors” Shoot comment?

Sonjay Dutt speaks about Sting. He mentions how big of a name Sting is to TNA and the wrestling world.

Commercials

We return with Shane Douglas with AMW. Jarrett interupts this by talking about Sting, who according to Jarrett, hasn’t wrestled in 5 years. I guess he’s not counting his stint in TNA. Jarrett is going to do his own tribute to Sting. Something that the crowd shits on. “Go find D’Amore” ::Jarrett turns around:: “Oh, hey Scott.” Wow. D’Amore has a letter from Jackie for Jarrett. Appearently Jarrett was drunk in Canada and screwed Jackie, atleast that’s what I got out of that little exchange. I hate that f*cking storyline.

Apolo & Homicide vs. The Naturals: Konnan gets on the mic and babbles about something or another. He’s calling his group 3LK: 3 Latino Kru. Clever. 3LK gets the early advantage but The Naturals turn things around on them. Konnan gets in the ring and hits the ref. He then pulls out a blackjack and hits The Naturals. The Outlaws come out only to get beatdown by 3LK. Kip comes in with a chair to clear house. Wow, is it sad that I actually like this new group and their edge?
Winners – Naturals by DQ

Chris Sabin’s favorite Sting moment is when Sting beat Hogan for the World Title with Hart as the ref. Wow, I share the same “Favorite Sting Moment” with Chris Sabin. HAIL LAMBERT!

Commercials

Douglas is outside of Zybskos door and Gayda comes out bitching about something. Aries, Shelley and Strong come out of nowhere and Zybskos says he has no time for them. “I bet you would have time if we were Christopher Daniels or AJ Styles” “There’s more to the X Division than just Styles, Joe, and Daniels” MORE SHOOT COMMENTS! Although, I agree with those comments 100% Jerry Lynn comes up and tells them to start winning. I really like that little stable as well. 2/2 on stables tonight for TNA.

Bobby Roode vs. Ron Killings: Let’s see if this match lasts longer than 2 minutes. Killings quickly rolls up Roode for the win. Uhhh nope. Holy shit, I actually expected this to go for a good bit and instead it lasts 6 seconds.
Winner – Ron Killings

Roode gets on the mic and the crowd chants “1, 2, 3” Roode calls Killings a thug and Killings comes back down and the bell rings again. So another match I guess.

Bobby Roode vs. Ron Killings Part 2: A choke by Roode to start but Killings fights out and rolls up Roode for 3. Wow, he beat him twice in less than a minute.
Winner – Ron Killings

Now D’Amore is on the mic and he’s pissed. The crowd chants “One more time” and Killings agrees.

Bobby Roode vs. Ron Killings Part 3: Clothesline by Roode to start. Headlock by Roode. Killings fights out but Roode stops that momentum. Twisting clothesline by Killings followed by a running powerslam for 2. So a roll up gets 3 but a running powerslam gets 2? Bulldog just turned over in his grave. D’Amore distracts Killings and Roode hits the Northern Lariat for the win.
Winner – Bobby Roode

AJ Styles favorite Sting moment is when he turned to the Crowd Sting.

Commercials

Douglas is with Joe. Douglas says “you think I need this interview?” and walks away but Joe grabs him and….SPEAKS! Joe doesn’t sound like I pictured Joe to sound. Joe says what the crowd chants “Joe Will Kill You!” Douglas asks Joe about Sting. “Fuck Sting, TNA paid him all that money and won’t give me shit. Fuck that black and white old ass faggot” Ok, he didn’t say that but since this is “Shoot Night” in TNA, I figured I would throw that in.

Alex Shelley & Roderick Strong & Austin Aries vs. Christopher Daniels & Chris Sabin & AJ Styles: This match is being called the best match ever on impact which means f*ck PBP. I’m going highlight mode for this one.

Commercials

Sabin and Shelley start it off. Shelley spits at Sabin! 15 yard penalty (come on, like you didn’t see Sean Taylor do it in the playoff game today). middle rope hurricanrana by Shelley. Strong is in and he gets a hurricanrana by Sabin. Daniels is in and does a little somethin before tagging in AJ. AJ and Daniels do some double team moves. They work really good as a team. AJ hits “The Most Perfect Fucking Dropkick Ever” or The MPFDE. Shlley comes in and goes to work on AJ. Knee smashes by Shelley. Strong tags in. Butterfly suplex by Strong. Shelley back in. AJ fights everyone off. Some sweet ass triple team shit by Gen Next. AJ comes back with the Pay Lay on Aries. Shelley and Daniels tag in. Daniels hits everything that moves. Daniels hits some sweet ass double team move on Shelley and Aries. Sabin tags in and hits a springboard dropkick. Double suicide dive by Daniels and Sabin. A lot of action on the outside that I can’t keep up with. In the ring, Sabin tries the Cradle Shock but it’s blocked. Some cool as move by Strong followed by the Shell Shock by Shelley on Sabin and it’s over.
Winners – Generation Next

Wow, that match really needed some more time. Still, that match was awesome and I hope it begins the push of Shelley, Aries, and Strong.

Christian talks about how big of a name Sting is

Commercials

We return with Jarrett coming out. For those who don’t know, this is where Jarrett does a tribute, the crowd shits on it, and this will be heavyily edited. Jarrett points us to the stage. The early years of Sting: It’s Eric Young as old school multi colored, blonde hair Sting. He actually pulls off the look very well. Jarrett gives some nice background info on Sting. 1996 Sting: Another good Sting dress up by Chris Harris. He points the bat and everything. The Modern Day Sting: It’s Monty Sting with a baby carriage and everything. Monty Sting gets on the mic. MONTY STING YELL!!!!!!!! “THAT’S HOW WE STROLL!!!!!!!!!” This leads to the countdown and my favorite wrestler and yours…CHRISTIAN MO FUCKIN CAGE! Christian just saved a bunch of money on his car insurrance!!!! Christian has some back up and it’s Team 3-D. The faces clean house on the Stings. Abyss comes in and destroys the faces until Rhino makes the save. GORE! GORE! GORE! Wait for it, wait for it, BECAUSE THAT’S HOW THE FACES ROLL!!!!!

End Show