The NeelDown RAW Events

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– Okay, now that I have your attention, 24 doesn’t really suck. Well, it might, I don’t know. I’ve never watched it. With all the hype and talk about it though lately, I figured with that kind of witty headline everyone would storm into this column with their e-mail documents up ready to curse me out saying stuff like Jack rules! Well, none of that please. It was just a marketing scheme.

I’m not saying that The Raw Events wouldn’t normally get a lot of attention though. Zarur is a good friend of mine, and I think he does a superb job with it every week. It’s just that with something filling in as a guest author, generally some people might not be their usual interested. Of course that rule is broken if you are Jed Shaffer, who creates genious columns when he fills in for Gordi.

I’m going to try to stick with Zarur’s basic style, so enjoy.

The NeelDown Raw Events – 1.16.2006

– From North Carolina

– Hosts are King, Coach, & Joey Styles

The MAIN Events

– Shawn Michaels def. Kurt Angle (via rollup)(***1/2)
While it didn’t live up to its hype of being another MOTYC like the WrestleMania match, it was above average for a RAW TV match, to say the least. The screwy ending was that while HBK was locked into the Ankle Lock he tried to get to the ropes and was getting taunted by Daivari, he slapped Davari so Daivari came in with a chair, Angle stopped him, he accident hit Angle with it giving HBK a roll up victory. This led to Angle destorying Daviari with an Angle Slam to the outside after the match. He also afterwards fired him as a manager and said he sucked.

– Master Lock Challenge, special guest John Cena. Edge came out and nailed Cena with the title before he could break the hold.

– The Skankateers (Joey Style’s new nickname for Victoria, Candice Michelle & Torrie Wilson) def. Trish Stratus, Mickie James & Ashley (via Victoria’s Widow’s Peak on Ashley) (1/4*)
The Mickie-Ashley feud continued after Ashley accidently knocked Mickie off the apron and Mickie attacked. I don’t even know why they keep having these tag matches as Candice, Torrie and Chloe never actually cross the ropes.

– Shelton Benjamin def. The Big Show (via countout) (1/2*)
Previously Shelton’s momma (hey Lambert, I think I saw your chunky soup sign) had demanded Vince make Shelton a match, so this was it. Triple H interfered and him and Big Show brawled for a while, giving Shelton the win because he got counted out.

– Edge def. Ric Flair in a TLC match to retain the WWE title (***3/4)
Surprisingly, a lot was done with the weapons in this one, notably a superplex off the top of the ladder, Edge’s splash off the ladder, Flair pushing Edge off the ladder through a table at ringside. After that, Flair came inches from grabbing the title, but Lita interfered causing Flair to get of the ladder and lock her in the Figure Four, giving Edge enough time to knock him off on a second attempt and unlatch it to retain.

Quick HEAT

— Edge and Lita start the show by mocking all the people who thought that last week’s live sex celebration are out of luck, to be blunt. New WWE Heavyweight Champion Kurt Angle comes out and they square off, with Angle challenging him to a match to unify the titles. Vince comes out and says that it won’t happen, as Edge has to face Ric Flair in the first ever singles TLC match for his title, and that Angle still has to face Shawn Michaels tonight, but the stipulation is that is HBK loses, his contract is terminated.

— Masters ripped on Carlito for causing him the Eliminaton Chamber match in an interview with Maria, so that is why they had the Cena Master Lock Challenge, to prove that he would have one.

— Some more Vince-Candice stuff ensued, with Vince thinking he was about to have sex with Candice after someone came in his room but it ended up being Shelton’s Momma.

— Carlito shoots on RVD and reminds us what happened when the still-injured RVD was on Carltio’s Cabana, the last time he was on RAW. He goes on to say that no one will be able to eliminated him in the Rumble, so Kane comes out and tosses him over.

RAW Analysis
— While I doubt everyone was watching due to 24, it was a solid show for RAW. The main event TLC exceeded expectations and Angle-Michaels was fine.

Join Carlos Zarur back here next Monday for another edition of The RAW Events. You’ll see me elsewhere.