“Stop sniffing my fiancé”
– Luke to Kirk
I suppose an explanation is in order for that quote. Well, our beloved Kirk’s on an all-juice diet, and his sense of smell is stronger than ever. As is his desire for blueberry pancakes. In other opening scene happenings at Luke’s, Lane shows Lorelai her flyer announcing she’s a drummer for hire. Lane also just happens to mention the quality time she’s been sharing with April. You know, Luke’s just-found daughter that Lorelai’s not aloud within 100 yards of…
Theme Song
Rory’s continues to run the Yale Daily News, and things seem to be going smoothly enough…except for a certain staffer/former editor named Gellar. Rory approaches Doyle (why does he resurface now, where was he during her meltdown?) for advice on how to handle the delicate flower that is Paris. Doyle advises her to ride it out: he’s not having the easiest time with Paris either. Try living with her…
Lane’s looking for a new band, so she drops by the music store to put up her “Drummer for Hire” flyer. Zach and that weird tambourine dude are in the middle of a bluegrass jam when Zach spots Lane. She exits, and he checks out the flyer – leaving that weird tambourine dude to do an impromptu solo.
Rory & Logan get dressed together. How cute. Logan whines about going to his sister’s rehearsal dinner. Rory’s all psyched about her Young Voices of Journalism panel. I’m not.
Lorelai and Christopher attend the panel, and marvel at how many words Rory uses they’ve never heard of. They’re very proud.
Lorelai: If I had a giant cooler of Gatorade, I’d pour it over your head
They also talk about his daughter Gigi. Christopher seems to be at a loss with his kid. Lorelai offers to pitch in and baby-sit.
Is there a Hep Alien reunion in the works? Even though I said a few recaps back that I was tired of the band, it was great to see Gil (Sebastian Bach, of course) and Brian’s new band playing Gwen Stefani and Black Eyed Peas tunes at a Bat-Mitzvah. As they say to Zach, who wants the band back together, a gig’s a gig.
Shift to pre-rehearsal dinner. Rory gets roped into hanging out with Honor and her bridesmaids from hell, and while she’s hangin’ finds out that Logan hooked up with a few of them recently. I need a timeline to know if this is bad or not. Regardless, Rory goes off on Logan for his holiday trysts, and just like that they’re broken up. You would think I’d be elated, but I’m not.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Lorelai’s got her hands full with Gigi – three year-old from hell. She colors the floor with permanent marker, she pulls Paul Anka’s tail, and she screams like a banshee if she hears the word no. Lorelai gives Christopher her two cents on Gigi, and he doesn’t appreciate it much at all – storming out.
Lane: You’re disgusting, and you’re cheating on your juice diet
Kirk: I didn’t cheat. I expanded the definition of juice
Zach then enters Luke’s and tells Lane that it’s all wrong, followed by “will you marry me?” What?!? I feel like I missed more than a scene or an episode, maybe half a season? The only thing more ridiculous is Lane’s answer of “yes”. To quote Gob from Arrested Development, “Come on!” Zach’s an okay guy on his best day, and he doesn’t have many of those. This is what Lane’s settling for?
Next we find a very drunk Rory joined by a very drunk Doyle at a bar on campus. Wait a minute…Rory and Doyle – could this episode get any stranger? Well, they’re both homeless (Paris kicked Doyle out and Rory kicked herself out).
Doyle: I’m staying with two guys who have blacklight posters on every wall. It’s depressing…
So they finally leave the bar, Doyle kind of gropes Rory, and Rory puts a stop to it pronto. Can’t believe I thought they were going to hook up. Can’t believe I just used the word “pronto”.
The episode ends with Christopher calling Lorelai to apologize, and she says it’s okay.
She’ll be there for Christopher and help with Gigi. Sounds like trouble to me. And Rory crawls back to Paris, saying nothing about the groping – just that guys suck. The end.
A couple closing thoughts: it was an almost Luke-free episode, which was weird. Even more bizarre was no mention of the answering machine fiasco that closed Vineyard Valentine. Emily’s planning for a June 3rd wedding, and Lorelai’s not the least bit freaked out? And there seems to be no new Gilmore Girls on the horizon to solve these and other dilemmas…
