Somebody owes SOMEBODY an apology…
And guess what…
It’s not you.
Okay, so let’s go through the score of events that have lead me to writing this column. Last week – you see – I had an unfortunate turn of events by actually attempting to enjoy the New York Comic Con. Sunday, I finally got in – and it held the column off as who knew I’d be able to get in?!
So I’m sorry you didn’t get your Marvel News last week.
This week, Dani is sick as a dog and my computer has died in the process of me writing this column once. I swear to god… nobody wants you to know what’s going on over at the ‘M’… but I do.
So let’s get started with a letter calling me out on more of my bullshit.
HATTON GETS CALLED OUT!
(Courtesy of Not Newsarama)
So essentially, the place to be is Newsarama, as this column pretty much
amounts to a big Talkback on the various articles posted there. Why
perpetuate the illusion that you’ve got any other news sources? Simply title
the column “My Thoughts On Newsarama.com’s Articles” and be done with it. 😉
Let me say thank you for pointing me out on being a hack. Okay? I admit it. I’m the lowest form of scum there is writing. I sit and pilfer other people’s news and republish it. Why? Because that’s kind of the point of the column, for you to read the news – then see one person’s opinion on it. Hopefully validating (or infuriating) your own sense of being.
Why is the column just a reiteration of Newsarama at times? Well that’s because, whether you know it or not, Marvel suckles on the Newsarama teat. Hard. Joey Q has a column there. They give all their preview info to them first. Newsarama is the mecca of your news for comics. Even writing on a comic review/news website, I can’t refute that if something important is coming out from Marvel – Newsarama knew it first.
So why should I go searching ALL over the internet? It’s all RIGHT THERE!? I might miss the occasional fun interview, but I really really realy really hate reading interviews. It’s bad enough I ruin months of storylines for myself as it is… why the hell am I going to fake the idea that I scour the world for real news? Pffft….
MARVEL COW… TOP MARVEL…. COW MARVEL TOP THING… IMAGE.
(Courtesy of Whisp’s Favorite Site)
Among this past weekend?s bigger New York Comic-Con announcements by Marvel [at the Cup ‘O Joe panel] was a ?packaging deal? the publisher has agree to with Top Cow Productions, the first product of which will be artist Tyler Kirkham?s upcoming two issue stint on Amazing Spider-Man #530-531. Newsarama caught up with Top Cow?s President and COO Matt Hawkins, along with Marvel?s Joe Quesada, to get a few more details.
So what does this mean? It means over the course of the next couple years we’ll be seeing a return to big cross company crossovers like Spawn vs. Wolverine and Witchblade Inside Emma Frost. Actually it would be neat to see what the world of the two companies come up with together, given how the world of comics has evolved so much since the mid 90s when we saw these kinds of stories all the time.
Anyone remember DEVIL’S REIGN … it was pretty.
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN 20,000 ASSHOLES GO TO NEW YORK AT THE SAME TIME?
(Courtesy of Newsarama)
So like I said – I was in New York this past weekend during the big comiccon… and if you didn’t know better, you would think nothing happened there. Well apparently Marvel made a bunch of announcements. I’m going to go through them in bullet points. So let’s start with:
NON SPECIFIC STUFF FROM THE WORLD OF THE ‘M’ – aka CUP o’ JOE
*** NEIL GAIMAN
This summer – John Romita Jr. meets Neil Gaiman on THE ETERNALS… what does that mean? That means I explode. I just .. boom. Ok? I will freely admit there are few things in this world that I worship in the world of Comics. There is Deadpool. There is Evan Dorkin. There is JMS. There is Neil Gaiman.
I will be there.
Skottie Young will be replacing the late Seth Fisher on the Free Comic Book Day offering. Sad sad sad… but Skottie Young should be a strong replacement.
*** GHOST RIDER
Daniel Way, Javier Salteres, and Mark Texeira picking up where Ennis left off…. there is absolutely nothing with this. Absolutely nothing at all. Albeit I would have liked to see Ennis’ future plans – but his book felt a touch too Preachery for me. Also there will be Spirit Of Vengence series as reported here a few weeks ago.
*** DOCTOR STRANGE
Last year’s Hatton Writer Of Awesomeness, Brian K Vaughan tagged with Marcos Martin will be getting a Doc Strange mini-series. The images have Strange looking like a neat Vincent Price kind of dude. Fantastic stuff. Check it out over at the Joe Friday column.
*** YOUNG AVENGERS
YA will be ending on Issue #12 – and restarting ala Runaways This is all to let Heinberg get on with some creative stuff and come back to write it. That’s right, Heinberg doesn’t feel this is just a contract obligation – he loves these kids and because of him, we love them. So if they need to put the book on pause for that, fine. Do it. I’ll wait. If you aren’t reading YA – you ain’t shit.
*** WHO IS TAMARA YOUNG?
See apparently, I don’t know who Tamara Young is because I’m a twenty-something year old man. She writes teenage fantasy stuff for girls… which is generally what I am now going to leave in my van for kids to pick u… nevermind.
Either way – she will be picking up one of Bendis’ Daredevil creations, White Tiger – and who better than try to pull in some good ol’ fashion girls, than a female writer known for writing for females? Few people. So kudos, once again to Marvel above the Distinguished Competition for trying to get the girls into the love of comics – not to mention stretching a bit outside the box on getting kids to read.
No… no snarky comment. I really mean all of that. A lot actually.
THE X-WORLD – CHRIS CLAREMONT – ETC
**** ON ASTONISHING X-MEN
Whedon and Cassaday will continue to be bi-monthly until September when it goes full run. Also after they are done the book will continue as an ongoing without them.
Is it me or does Astonishing just not feel to synch with the rest of the MU… my guess is that’s because the book was written prior to House of M, it just doesn’t feel as if it works with the continuing world of the X-Folk, barely mentioning 199, Decimation, etc.
**** X-MEN ANNUAL
Storm will be getting focus on a new X-Men Annual in June/July. Written by Claremont, I’m left with a gentle sense of ennui… especially since it deals with Storm who is becoming more and more useless with each passing issue. The Panther’s arm candy kids…
This is a book about what it would be like if the X-Men had aged as real people instead of comic characters. Bringing us four generations later, where the characters from Morrison’s X-Men are the current inheritors of the earth. Sounds like a neat concept – but after it sucks – it will pass in the annuls of history as nothing that anyone really noticed.
**** CIVIL WAR
X-Men won’t have to deal with Civil War – until their own Miniseries X-Men: Civil War…. Go them.
**** ON THE SENTINALS
In talking about the Sentinel’s role in the Marvel Universe, Quesada rhetorically asked Marts, “Could you imagine if Sentinels had to watch more than mutants? Like something more across the country?”
So, thanks for the ending of Civil War.. asses.
**** ON THE BEAST
People want Ape Beast.. not Cat Beast. I agree. Stupid Morrison.
**** ON DEADPOOL
Another vote had people talking about Peter David writing Deadpool in X-Factor… and I’m ok with that – just as long as Cable/Deadpool doesn’t disappear.
**** ON EXILES
Did anyone else know that Claremont was taking over the book after Bedard left? Color me scared…. Color me so so so scared. What does Blink think of this?
…me too Blink…
**** ON UNCANNY
Brubaker’s scheduled for at least a year on Uncanny… oh, what a gentle sweet reprieve we are getting in the X-Books this upcoming summer. It will be so sweet. I am going to say right now – that X-Men will be some of the best written shit around in the months to come.
NYCC PART TWO: CIVIL WAR
**** SHE-HULK & PUNISHER
We’ll be seeing the Green Girl and the Punishing One making big splashes in Civil War. Let’s hope it doesn’t effect Ennis’ book. There will be lots of pissed off fanboys who like comics with curse words…
**** FANTASTIC FOUR
The FF will be seeing some big action at the END of Civil War, throwing them into a deep plotline for the next year. They make a point to tell us that it’s the 45th anniversary of the FF as Civil War ends. I have one word for you…
**** ALPHA FLIGHT
Mark Millar is going to be writing Alpha Flight? I’m in. I’m SO in.
**** NEW AVENGERS
So the entire line up is going to change, and that’s because we at least know that Iron Man and Cap’n are going to be head to head… I predict that Cap’n will remain. Why? Because Iron Man compared, looks like a fool, next to the Cap.
NYCC PART THREE: THE ULTIMATE PANEL
**** ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR
So after Millar and Land leave… Mike Carey and artist Pascual Ferry will be joining on the team. Which means – less breasts. Less hair. The designs look pretty good right off the get go, but I really did love the zombie FF.
**** ULTIMATE ANNUALS
Ulty Spidey will have one with Bendis on Spidey. It will deal with stuff from the Warriors storyline, which had lots of plotlines yet to explore. So.. neat.
**** ULTIMATE DEADPOOL
Bendis said he was verrrrry different on his translation to Deadpool. Somewhere if you listen carefully and deeply – the night the book is released. You will somewhere hear me crying. I promise you that.
**** ULTIMATE CROSSOVER
Yep there is a crossover coming. Which is a good thing. I can’t say no to a big cross Ultimate story crossover that will hopefully unite the Ultimates world with the regular Ultimate world – because right now the Ultimates just feels like it’s not even in the same UNIVERSE as Spidey or X-Men.
So there you go.
That is everything that came out of New York – don’t you feel better having not gone?
CIVIL WAR #2 COVER!
Do I need to say more? It’s pretty hawt. And I hate adding double-u’s to the word ‘hat’….
COMIC MOVIES RETURN!
So since I seem to be getting the shaft on writing so much from Newsarama – we are going to steel from Comic Book Resources since they get all the best comic tv/movie news. SEE! Two sites I’m pilfering from…
/// SPIDER-MAN 3
So I missed this big buzz discussion due to my lack of being here last week. So let’s discuss it now. This is the original image. The non-doctored one without the Spidey logo on the chest. Is it Black Outfit? Is it Venom? Is it a Black shaded photo to make us fanboys drool with lust?
You know what. It’s an awesome poster. That’s what it is. If Spidey, for some reason goes black costume – I know Raimi will make it work.
Highlight for teaser/spoiler:
In X-MEN: THE LAST STAND, the final chapter in the “X-Men” motion picture trilogy, a “cure” for mutancy threatens to alter the course of history. For the first time, mutants have a choice: retain their uniqueness, though it isolates and alienates them, or give up their powers and become human. The opposing viewpoints of mutant leaders Charles Xavier, who preaches tolerance, and Magneto, who believes in the survival of the fittest, are put to the ultimate test – triggering the war to end all wars.
Borrowing from Whedon. I’m ok with that.
Also reported – and put into my ‘annoyance’ bin:
“Now she has a definite point of view, and that’s been really wonderful for me. I know [director] Brett [Ratner] was really instrumental in making that happen. He’s really been a supporter of finding a voice for the character.”
In the past I’ve discussed how I find Halle Berry’s stance on the X movies horrendous. For those who want the summation – it goes like this. She bitched and moaned after X-2 because Storm didn’t have a lot of air time. Of course, given she’s an Oscar Award Winning Actress – she deserves to be shined upon like a beam of sunlight on a cloudy day.
Why can’t a person just be happy with the place they are in? It was just this huge ego strike that maybe.. JUST MAYBE the movie and plot of an ensemble cast movie (With other notable actors as Ian McKellen and Anna Paquin) can’t just shush. Yeah, so now she’s apparently happy because she’s featured. Whoop-de-f*ck.
/// CAPTAIN AMERICA?
This from AVI ARAD:
“Without giving too much away, obviously there’ll be a little bit of the origin and then we come into our real world,” Arad said. “What makes Captain America such a compelling character is that it allows you to judge history so you see where he came from and you see what he stood for.” Arad doesn’t expect that shield to be ricocheting off the walls of cineplexes before 2009.
Neat. Oh, and David Self (who is currently writing Sub-Mariner and Deathlok) will be seemingly writing it. (He also wrote Road to Perdition)
/// FANTASTIC FOUR 2
Apparently Wired magazine is talking about rumors of Keanu Reeves as Norrin Radd, the Silver Surfer.
Funny enough I just rewatched Fantastic Four. It’s NOT so horrible. You know what’s so bad about it? What makes it better than Hulk, but worse than Punisher? VICTOR VON DOOM! Get a new Doom – that movie would have been much better. Not just the actor… new plot for him all together. Please. GODS PLEASE.
Oh – and insert obvious Keanu joke here.
/// ULTIMATE AVENGERS 2
I also saw Ultimate Avengers this past week – and it’s not altogether bad.
Some of the animation is great!
Some of the voices are perfect! (Iron Man)
Catches the real feel of the Ultimates.
Nick Fury is NOT Samuel L. Jackson
Nick Fury is NOT Michael Dorn
The 3-d Animation is horrendous
Some of the animation is choppy at best
No horny Freddie Prince Jr scene.
So knowing they are making a second does little for me.. but I’ll watch it.
/// THE DEADLY HANDS OF SHANG CHI
Ang Lee is checking this property out.
Somewhere – a panel in panel shot is being invisioned.
Somewhere – a baby is crying.
STILL READING – I APPLAUD YOU!
In what has to be my longest column EVER! I hope you all had fun, and tell me what you think of the new format for pictures laid out everywhere that makes it all seem so much bigger and brighter.
That’s the new way of things.
It is the way of the future.
This is Hatton – saying check out my comic reviews every Tuesday starting next week, as me and Andy Campbell have switched spots. We’ll see you then.