The Reality of Wrestling: Worst Mania Ever?
By Phil Clark & J.D. Speich
With Wrestlemania under a month away and it shaping up to be one of the worst WM cards in years, we thought it would be appropriate to look back and see what the worst Wrestlemania ever was. It’s no secret that every big wrestling promotion has screwed up their biggest show at least once; WCW did it with their last four or five (we lose count) Starrcade shows, AWA did it with Super Sunday and New Japan has done it with just about every Tokyo Dome show for the past couple of years. How bad the E has screwed up Mania is up for judgment, however the REALLY bad shows should be universal.
P.C. Says: Wrestlemania IV was the worst WM ever
When it came down to deciding the worst Wrestlemania ever, I came up with four choices: IV, IX, XI, and XV. While they were all bad shows overall, all but IV had redeeming factors. The booking for XV showed why I hate Vince Russo, but it had Austin/Rock in the main-event, so it’s off the list; Shawn/Diesel saved XI, so it’s gone; and I’m a fan of events (mainly boxing) in the Caesar’s parking lot and the presentation was good, plus it was a much shorter show than IV, so it gets a pass. That leaves us with Wrestlemania IV and considering Donald Trump and Vince McMahon were involved, it’s no real shock that this would be the worst Wrestlemania ever.
Now, IV is a more historically significant show than IX, but IX had about ½ the matches IV did, and I mean that in amount. With sixteen matches and at around 4 ½ hours, there was little chance that the E back in 1988 was going to put on a quality show overall. The only smart booking of the night saw Randy Savage win his first WWF Title and Demolition win the tag belts. Those were also the only bits of historical significance associated with the show (two more than IX) unless you count that IV was the first of two straight WM’s to be hosted by Trump.
However, other than the two title changes, the rest of the night was cluttered with stupid or worse booking. Why were The Bulldogs in a comedy six-man tag instead of a real tag match? Why was there a battle royal to open the show and not something that might get the crowd into the show? Why was Jesse Ventura posing one of the highlights of the show? Ok, that last one was a trick, but it does show how bad the show was. First off, having an ENTIRE TOURNAMENT on one show is a risk; having a whole tournament on your biggest show of the year is going to be a disaster. And that’s what this tournament was as the stupid “we must have heel/face matches” mentality prevented a Savage/Steamboat re-match from III, Jake Roberts and Rick Rude were sent out to die with the only 15-minute match of the night, and Bam Bam Bigelow (who was picking up a following going into the show) was not allowed to make any kind of impact with a first round exit.
Now, I’d like to point out that the financial aspect of this show was completely opposite of the quality aspect of the show. Yes, the show drew a sell-out, yes it got a good buy-rate, and yes it still made like a bazillion dollars despite a better NWA show costing them a couple bazillion (that show was headlined by the 45-minute Sting/Flair match). Now, I’m a person who realizes that the main goal in the wrestling business is to make money; hence the word business attached to it. I also know that the second goal is to entertain the people and keep them coming back for more, and that entertaining can mean a card of great matches or exactly the opposite. But in this case, I’m not critiquing if the show made money or not, I’m critiquing whether it was good or not. Every Wrestlemania has made profit for the E whether it’s from the live gate, merchandise, or the PPV buyrate, usually it’s the buyrate.
So, this does put this year’s Mania into perspective doesn’t it? To say that the E hasn’t f*cked up Mania as badly as they are this year is an understatement of the highest caliber. I’ve just given you a perfect example of how they couldn’t have sent everyone home happy.
J.D. Says: Wrestlemania XI is the worst WM ever
My pick for the worst Wrestlemania ever has to be Wrestlemania 11. This pick I’m sure would be a majority pick for most, but not because of my reasoning. First, let’s take a look at the card:
Lex Luger & British Bulldog vs Jacob & Eli Blu
Intercontinental Title Match: Razor Ramon vs Jeff Jarret
Undertaker vs King Kong Bundy
World Tag Team Titles Match: Owen Hart & Yokozuna vs Smoking Gunns
Bret Hart vs Bob Backlund in an I Quit Match
WWE Heavyweight Title Match: Diesel vs Shawn Michaels
Lawrence Taylor vs Bam Bam Bigelow
Number one, this card is short for a Wrestlemania card at the time, hell it’s short for a Wrestlemania card period. Only having seven matches at the biggest pay-per-view of the year just isn’t cutting it. There could have been nine or ten matches put on this card because let’s face it, this card was extremely dull aside from the I Quit Match and the WWE Title Match. You could have put in two or three more filler matches with some good quality wrestlers.
Wrestlemania 11 is the worst Wrestlemania ever not only because the card was dull, but also because it was put in a very bad order. The lead off match was terrible, the WWE definitely could have thought of something better to lead off their largest PPV of the year instead of a non-title tag match. The mid-card would have been extremely crappy had it not been for Bret and Bob on a good I Quit Match. Aside from that match, the mid-card is in disarray.
But these bad booking decisions pail in comparison to the decision of putting L.T. Vs. Bam Bam in the main event. What the hell was the WWE thinking when they put a match that featured a former NFL football player against a wrestler who had no drawing power? This has to go down as one of the worst, if not the worst, booking decisions in WWE history. This match was nothing more than a publicity stunt the WWE was trying to shove down the fans’ throat; well I’m sorry to say that I’m not buying. This match belonged where most celebrity matches belong: in the mid-card. Save your main-event for the match that’s supposed to matter the most, the WWE Title Match. Shawn Michaels Vs. Diesel should have been the main-event at Wrestlemania with no questions asked. Not only was this match probably the best match on the card, but at least it had heat and a built up rivalry. L.T. and Bam Bam had little to no build up what so ever and was pretty much shoved down our throats. Putting your WWE Title Match behind this match was also stupid because how in the hell is a match with someone with no wrestling experience going to be able to top a match with Shawn Michaels? It’s not. I can’t believe the WWE had the nerve to headline Wrestlemani 11 with a publicity stunt match, its just ridiculous.
The bottom line is that Wrestlemania 11 was down right terrible. The card itself seemed to fit what we would see out of a present day Great American Bash card. From start to finish the card was crappy with the exception of two matches and featured the worst main event in Wrestlemania history. This pay-per-view was a disgrace to the legacy that is Wrestlemania and should be forgotten in everyone’s mind. This pay-per-view was so bad that it shouldn’t even be put into the Wrestlemania package, but of course you can’t go out of chronological order.
The Reality is…this year’s Wrestlemania doesn’t look too good. The Triple Threat with Angle, Mysterio, and Orton should one of the few things workrate fans will eat up, but what else is there? Taker/Henry in a Casket match may be the year’s first Worst Match of the Year candidate, Chris Benoit has been given a Herculean task having to try and pull JBL to a decent match, and then there’s Cena/HHH. Everyone should know by now that this match has little chance of being anything good. However, for what it will likely lack with its presentation, it makes up with its hype. People will want to see this match for three reasons: to see if Cena gets booed out of the building at the biggest show of the year, as a proverbial time capsule between the old and the future, and if HHH will win again. Even the Money In The Bank match has already suffered with Ric Flair’s inclusion and Carlito not being included despite being the one who announced the damn thing! If the E thinks they are going to top one million buys, they are dreaming. Last year’s WM did 925,000 buys and you can make the argument that 100,000 of those buys (if not more) were made because the event had the Wrestlemania label attached to it. This year, the E may not be so lucky.
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