Who's Who in the DCU

EDITOR’S NOTE: This column needs a logo. And we would love for you guys to provide it. If you feel the spirits of creativity moving you, don’t fight it, embrace it. Send the result to Mathan and/or myself and, who knows, you may just be immortalized in a few week’s time.

Thanks. And now, back to your program.

I finally caught the episode of Duck Dodgers where he becomes a Green Lantern. It’s a damn fun, fanboy episode. Tim, I noticed a reference to The Unit in your column. I take it you dig the show?

So far, yes, I’m digging it. Come on, it’s Mamet! I couldn’t well live with myself if I didn’t dig it. The man is, in a word, awesome. He’s so cool, sheep count him to go to sleep. (Look at me, stealing shamelessly from him while complimenting him.


IP Music is available in an edited version.

IP Movies has a buttery flavor.

IP Games is rated M.

IP Figures may contain choking hazards.

IP TV will be back after this commercial break.

IP Sports is not allowed in the stands.

Moodspins does not reflect the opinion of InsidePulse as a whole.

IP Culture knows which fork is which.

Our DC Forums is full of spoilers!

Tim, care to link anything this week?

What I Read Last Week: The Segment

Hard Time #4 – Great read. Amazing secondary character development. The “star” of the book is nearly absent that the book doesn’t suffer at all. I urge everyone to give this book a shot.

Firestorm #23 – Great cover. Interesting twist. I do feel sorry for fans of the original Firestorm as it appears they’re being toyed with, to a degree. Igle really makes the costume look cool.

Fell #4 – Fun issue, well as fun as can be had in Snowtown. I liked how this issued ended, with Fell cutting some corners. Next issue looks to be a killer. Tim, I think you should give next issue a shot.

Will do, Mathan, will do.

Matador #6 – Man, what a sad ending. Compromise of a moral nature is always tough to endure. And the very notion of a “hot” autistic blew my mind.

Just got this today (because of the weirdness with its scheduling”¦check out News & Views next week for that info) but a quick flip through made it seem like a wildly downeriffic issue.

Mister Miracle #4 – I wish every New Gods appearance were as cool as this one. I’m in love with Freddie Williams II’s art. Morrison, on the other hand continues to make my brain hurt.

Hurt in a good way though, right?

Frankenstein #3 – Damn PETA! Don’t they understand that the reality portrayed in this book could truly happen unless we eat animals? I don’t think they want a squirrel nibbling on their eyeballs!

Ahh, irony. The vegetarian Morrison reminds us all why cows must be eaten; because they are just waiting for the chance to eat us (and now I’ve stolen from the Simpsons, too. I am a thief).

Jonah Hex #4 – Somehow I neglected to read this book two weeks ago. Solid story, until the ending which ruins it. And it’s really just the size of the gun.

Teen Titans #33 – I know that Superman/Batman hasn’t kept a monthly schedule in awhile, but I don’t need another book cribbing its narrative. Nauck is the only reason to check this book out.

The Exterminators #3 – Dude, this book rocks. It’s creepy well written. It’s funny yet disturbing. And the characters are very interesting.

American Vigin #1 – Quite the strong debut issue. I fully believed the world portrayed. I caught hints of Y the Last Man (the phone conversation) but this book really does amaze. I highly recommend it.

Down #4 – Boo. I didn’t like this final issue. It was cliché. Maybe Ellis felt the pressure to wrap it up in this final issue, but I didn’t like it. The only thing I did enjoy about the issue was the art.

Son of M #4 – I like Quicksilver, so I read this book. But having not read House of M I do feel a tad lost. But what I really feel bad for is that both Quicksilver and Magneto have gone prematurely gray.

Captain Atom #6 – Pfeifer is really wowing me. I actually care about Cap and I can’t recall the last time I could say that.

And should you wish to see me delve a tad deeper into what I read last week and even assign a grade to every book, check out The Column Version

Earth-8 Redux

Last week we stirred up a hornets nest with the whole Earth-8 theorizing. Some readers had different ideas about Earth-8’s heroes.

Here’s the essence of how Earth-8 works in my head.

Earth-8 is just how Geoff Johns explained it in Wizard with the heroes created since Crisis ending up there.

Of course there are exceptions. Let’s look at the JSA which has characters with varying degrees of legacy.

Stargirl – She would clearly have existed on Earth-2. Not only is her mother married to Stripesy, but she used a belt that’s inherited from an Earth-2 character.

Mister Terrific – He was inspired by the original Mr. Terrific, but apart from that his ties are minimal. He would be on Earth-8.

Dr. Mid-Nite – He studied under the original, but his origin stands on it’s own. He’s very similar to Mr. Terrific with minimal ties. He’s also an Earth-8er.

Hawkgirl – Given the idea that Earth-1 would have the Thanagarian (Silver Age) Hawks, and Earth-2 would have the Golden Age Hawks, Kendra would be on Earth-8.

We could also look at the Teen Titans.

Robin – It’s my belief that he’d be on Earth-1. Batman didn’t get too shaken up by the Crisis, so I’ve got to believe that Jason Todd would still have died, thus Tim would have taken up the mantel.

Superboy – This one could go either way. If Supes still battled Doomsday, Kon would be on Earth-1. However I could also see a scenario where Kal didn’t arrive on Earth-8 alive, and Kon was cloned from him.

Kid Flash – He’s Barry Allen’s grandson, he’s obviously on Earth-1.

Speedy – Has ties to Green Arrow, but she could have sprung up without him. I see her as an Earth-8 gal.

I don’t know if my rationale is clear, but in my head it’s obvious who would have been on which Earth.

Onto the column proper.

Aye, aye. Onward and upward, sir!

Sadly no one placed the lyric last week. Cory H. didn’t place it either, but since no one forced me to answer their question by placing the lyric there was nothing to stop Cory H’s reign. Pray for us.

Cory H. likes the bloodshed. He likes it quite a bit.

Have Batman and Deathstroke ever fought, and what’s the battle tally so far?

9/14/04 column:
Deathstroke and Batman have met up a couple times. The most notable; they met up in the seventh issue of Deathstroke’s title and in Detective Comics #710. Now most fans think that Slade bested Bruce two of the three times they tussled.

They say Bats’ took an “L” in Deathstroke’s book (understandable) and in the first battle in Detective Comics. They point out that Slade walks away, leaving Batman face down on the floor.

But c’mon the guy has quadrupled reflexes! QUADRUPLED!!!!!!!!!!!!

I stand by my capitalized “quadrupled.” Of course with Slade having the won the best two out of three, it kind of implies that Batman isn’t quite as impressive as Nightwing (who’s tangled with Slade more often.)

Since Nightwing fares a bit better with Slade (they’ve got a bit of a rivalry going on) and Batman loses more often when faced with Slade, does it mean that Batman < Nightwing? That’s something to ponder. Tim, do you think that DC should publish a 13 issue maxi series that featured nothing but Batman/Deathstroke battles set in Hypertime and drawn by Rob Liefeld? I”¦I”¦umm”¦”¦”¦”¦I think my brain just burst.

Forgive Cory H., he knows not what he does.

So if Batman is Jack Bauer, is your opinion of Wolverine that he is, hmmmmm, Vic Mackey from The Shield?

My opinion of Wolverine you say? This is one can of worms that you are probably going to regret opening.

My opinion of Wolverine is that:

He’s yet another reason to hate Canada (I’m kidding, I love Canada, but I hate Wolverine)

He reminds me of both Fredo Corleone and Al Pacino (weak and sickly and someone who was cool but is now incredibly overrated and floating on reputation alone.)

I was out, but then they pulled me back in. Now I overact like crazy to teach “them” a lesson.

He got memory issues, but not the cool Leonard Shelby kind, the clichéd soap opera kind.

Remember Sammy Jankis, remember Sammy Jankis.

He’s like the Fonz, because he jumped the shark long ago (think “lost adamantium” long time ago.)

He’s like Jag in that his popularity and longevity baffle me.

Tell me, do you like a man in uniform?

He’s also like every other CBS procedural drama in that he’s uber predictable.

Wolverine isn’t so much like Vic Mackey as he is like Buffy or Angel; so cool that he became trendy which is kind of lame, which isn’t cool.

Tim, do you have an opinion of Wolverine?

He’s the Tasmanian Devil of the X-Men.

Ya, yaaa, bla, blah”¦bub

At some point, he got really popular but no one can seem to quite remember why. I never liked him, but I will say that Hugh Jackman’s performance in the X-films did help me appreciate the character miles and miles more. So I am a big fan of the live action version, but not so much the rest of it.

Cory H. doesn’t mind riding a gimmick into the ground

If Bats can defeat all the stuff I listed last week, can he succeed where Supes failed against Doomsday?

(For those of you who didn’t actually read the column last week”¦shame on you! Here’s a link but you’d better read it fast because I’m not holding this column up, nor am I going to spoon feed you.)

Ok, we’ve got to specify that the key to Batman winning is his planning. If he doesn’t know who he’s facing I’m not going to guarantee a win.

Is he going to use a different tactic than Superman? That’s a given, given that Supes tried to brawl the creature, and Bats wouldn’t go toe to toe with him.

Also the whole thing with the initial Superman/Doomsday confrontation is that Doomsday went after Superman because he was Kryptonian. Bats wasn’t in the League at the time, so unless Doomsday was making his way through Gotham, I really don’t see Batman getting involved.

I suppose that given Doomsday’s origin (forced evolution on Krypton) that one could suggest that Doomsday might be vulnerable to Kryptonite. Since Batman carries Kryptonite with him it could, in theory, work.

So yeah, I’d say that Batman will have a plan for Doomsday. Yes, I think that Batman could beat Doomsday. Is that what you wanted me to say Cory? Are you happy now?

Tim, can Batman beat Doomsday?

Batman beat the Hulk and the Hulk could beat Doomsday (and Superman, by the by) so yeah, he could.

Cory H. is using wrestling terms I just don’t understand

Since I am so anticipating a Wolverine/Batman teamup or battle, what do you think would happen if somehow their respected rogues gallery got switched? And who would win in a 2 outta 3 falls match between the 2? 1-In Madripoor, 1 in Gotham, and the last one in a Hell In a Cell? Be fair, now!

I’ll admit to being fairly ignorant to Wolverine’s rogue’s gallery. I know he’s got Sabretooth and Ninjas. However I also don’t see Logan as being a fan of the shaving industry or the Brazilian Wax.

“The best a man can get” vs the best at what he does – Platinum edition #0 issue in stores soon

Anyhow, comparing the two rogues galleries is like comparing WMD’s in Iraq and “the Others” on Lost; both are fictional creations used to perfectly counter or threaten our heroes.

Sure Wolverine would make mincemeat of the Bat Rogues, but that’s because they don’t really pose physical threats. They plan heists and put innocent lives in danger. They want to beat Batman or break him. They want to bend his will. But they don’t really believe they can pound him senseless. It’s much more a game of chess in Gotham. (Detective Comics, cerebral?)

On the other hand Wolverine’s rogues are physical threats. Sabretooth ain’t much of a thinker. Lady Deathshrike hasn’t planned too many heists and Omega Red doesn’t try to outthink Logan. Batman could beat them (though not all at once.)

Also, I don’t think that Wolverine’s rogues would work well together. I believe there would be serious infighting, which would give Batman the edge.

Wolverine at his most fierce.

As for Batman going head to head with Logan, here’s what I said in the 1/19/05 column;

Honestly the two are pretty evenly matched. Both have extensive martial arts training. Neither has super speed. Both have points atop their head.

I’m not too familiar with the limitations of Logan’s much-vaulted healing factor, and to me that’s really the deciding factor.

See, Logan likes to pop his claws early, it’s part of his “cool” factor. But that takes away the element of surprise from Logan. I have faith that Batman can evade Logan’s lunges, so that nullifies the claws.

Now if Logan’s healing factor has domain over pressure points, then Batman is toast. However if Logan is vulnerable to blows on pressure points, then Bats can pull out a win. He’s nice with the pressure blows.

Other than that, I hope Bruce has enough sense to run away, because as Wolverine’s written right now, he’s unbeatable.

Unless, Batman manages to catch Wolverine at the end of the month, when Logan will be tuckered out from appearing in two different team books, his own solo title and various guest spots in the Marvel U.

Tim, you agree with me then, do you still agree that Logan wins?

Unfortunately, yes. At this point, I think Logan has evolved beyond even Highlander status. You cut off his head, he’ll just grow one back.

Cory H. dares to question statements from last week

Bats in any top 5 category hmmmm? What about “closet queer eye viewer” or “closet Cubs fan”?

Yes Batman is Top 5 in everything. Here are a few categories you probably wouldn’t expect him to be in;

Best Quiche Recipe in the DCU

1. Alfred Penniworth
2. Todd Rice
3. Batman
4. Captain Atom
5. Amanda Waller

Worst Teenage Acne

1. Ragman
2. Vic Sage
3. Geo Force
4. Martian Manhunter (little known fact)
5. Batman

Most Likely to Kiss Hal Jordan on the Cover of a Comic Book

1. Carol Ferris
2. Kari Limbo
3. Comic Industry Big Shot Ben Morse’s Girlfriend Megan
4. Batman
5. Arisa

Best Loss of Leg Use

1. Barbara Gordon
2. The Chief
3. Hector Hammond
4. Batman
5. Jack Drake

So as you can see Batman will turn up, top five, no matter what category you put out there.

Tim, can you think of any category that Batman won’t be top five in?

Just one. Top Five Best at Tolerating Cory H.’s questions. So watch out Cory, the Bat is coming for you.

In Gotham, evil has a face and a name. That name is Cory H. That evil ends tonight.

Remember how I said Cory H. likes bloodshed? I wasn’t kidding.

As for that top 10 fighters list last week, battle royal who wins? And who has the best odds of defeating the other 9, or already has beaten any of them period?

I’ll be honest; I don’t even remember who I put on the list last week. Ok, I remember now.

I’m going to say that Bruce, Dick and Tim will be smart enough to stay out of the fray and observe.

Richard Dragon and Shiva will get into from jump. I think that Batgirl will also enter, because fighting is in her blood. Bronze Tiger and Connor will jump in to try to do the right thing. I also David Cain and Slade getting involved.

I see Slade, Shiva and Batgirl being the last standing. From there I’m guessing that Shiva goes for Batgirl, with Slade taking down the winner.

At that point the Bat fam enter the fray. They do the whole team thing to take down Slade, and it’s successful (they’ve got protocols and teamwork on their side). However Batman wants to win, so he puts Tim in danger to catch Dick off guard. Batman wins hands down.

And it’s ruthlessness and planning like that makes Batman the force that he is.

Tim, how do you see that playing out?

If it was to ever happen, I’d see it going down remarkably similarly. But, come on! Batman fighting to hurt Dick AND Tim”¦ever? I just don’t see it.

Plus, Tim shouldn’t be anywhere near the top 10, but I already mentioned that last week.

Talowolf missed a good one.

I never read the Breach run. What was his story up to being put on the tower?

My book was cool and creepy with great art”¦why won’t you love me?

Oh Breach. He was a military guy, who was involved in a government experiment gone awry some twenty years ago. It changed him. He ended up in a coma and was put into a containment chamber. He woke up about a year ago with fuzzy memories and powers he couldn’t really control.

The bulk of the series dealt with him getting reacquainted with new abilities and station in life. The series ended with him very nearly losing all his memory, which was leaking away throughout the series anyway.

I’m skipping over lots of stuff (his best friend married his wife, the Rifters) but it’s really tough to bring up the memories of a book that I loved so much.

Tim, what’s your favorite memory of Breach?

Breach going toe to toe with the Justice League (well, J’onn, Batman, and Superman anyway) and laughing derisively about a man willingly calling himself Superman.

I know that sound really minor, but it did a great job of showing how much Breach had missed in his coma and how that gave him a skewed perspective on the things that others in the DCU (and us, the readers, really) took for granted.

Admiral Snackbar has a question. Seriously, he says so himself.

I have a question. In the late 80’s, DC was in its experimental phase with projects like Dark Knight Returns, Watchmen, Man of Steel, Death in the Family, and Crisis on Infinite Earths. We’ve all heard of those, but that is mainly because they succeeded. My question is in regards to a particular project from around that time that nobody talks about anymore. I’m not even sure of the title, but I think it was called DC Challenge. Each issue would have a different creative team, with each team trying to stump the following team with an insane cliffhanger. That was the ‘Challenge’ aspect of the title. It may have had a few different teams that rotated every so often. I don’t know how long it lasted, or how long it was even supposed to last. What sank this series? Late shipping? Bad stories? Low interest? I must admit, the concept sounds intriguing. For some reason, I seem to remember it being a weekly thing, but it was definitely a limited series. Maybe I’m just trying to draw more parallels to 52 than there actually is.

It was indeed called the DC Challenge. It’s odd that I’ve really only dealt with this question once before. But here’s what I said then;

From the 5/5/5 column
It was an interesting concept to say the least. There were a few other rules as well. Writers couldn’t use character that they regularly wrote adventures for, and they also left the incoming writer with a story title, that the new writer had to use.

It sounds like fun, no? It had a few problems. The first one was that it took awhile to produce. Understandably, the writer for whoever was writing issue #5, couldn’t start writing until issue #4 was done. This caused the miniseries to drag into running along side Post Crisis DC books like Man of Steel..

That said, it was considered a last goodbye to the fun wacky Silver Age tales. I haven’t read the book, so I can’t tell you what happened. From what I’ve read about it, it featured Nazi-ruled Earths, Space Cabbie and even Supergirl. I’m sure you can find the rest of the series for dirt-cheap prices either at your comic shop or online.

It didn’t really succeed because it had two things going against it; it dealt with Pre Crisis set-ups after the Crisis had established a singular Earth. I also think that the concept might have been a bit too “high” for the time (back then comics were still pretty much kid stuff.)

It was intended to last 12 issues and, unlike Breach, it did.

How it began”¦

how it ended.

If 52 is a success, I’d imagine that DC would be willing to take a risk on a DC Challenge type mini, possibly. I do think that it would be better suited for Vertigo writers to do a self contained mini featuring DCU characters in this style.

Sadly that brings us to the end of yet another installment. Next week should be interesting. I hope that y’all will all be back for it.

In the mean time, send me your questions (you can send more than one at a time, as witnessed by Cory H.) or you can post them on Our Very Own Thread!

Before I go here’s my question for you this week; Who do you think could beat Batman?

“I’m the man with the magic wand, and I’ll turn all your faucets on.”