You Complete Bar Steward! (The Brandy Wars; Part 1) 20.03.06
Welcome to this fortnights edition of You Complete Bar Steward!
For the next couple of months (dubbed “The Brandy Wars”), we’ll be taking a look at some Brandy based Cocktails. So this doesn’t get too boring and tedious, I’ll cram THREE different Cocktails into each column, which should make both writing and reading this more interesting.
Our first Brandy Cocktail is…
Alexander
Difficulty Rating: 1/5
Taste/s: Creamy
Colour/s: Creamy Brown (more towards Brown)
Ingredients
25ml Brandy (or Cognac… your choice)
25ml Brown Crème de Cacao
Small amount of Light Cream
Equipment
Cocktail Glass
Shaker
Instructions
Put all the ingredients into the Shaker and shake well with ice. Strain the contents into the glass, and if you so desire, sprinkle with a little nutmeg.
Other…
This is quite the popular choice where I work, but I hate it because every time somebody orders one, I (or, rather, one of my minions) has to leg it to the kitchen at the other side of the hotel, steal some cream, then run back with it.
– – – – – – – –
A man walks into a bar…
… with a dog. The bartender says, “Hey buddy, can’t you read that sign? It says no dogs allowed! Get that mutt out of here!” The man replies, “No, I can’t read the sign – I’m blind, and this is my seeing eye dog.” The bartender is embarrassed and gives the man a beer on the house.
Later that day, the guy is telling his friend about it: “I told him I was blind and I got a free beer!” The friend then takes his dog into the bar and sits down, and the bartender says, “The sign says no dogs allowed! You’ll have to leave!” The friend says, “Sorry, I can’t see the sign because I’m blind, and this is my seeing eye dog.” The bartender replies, “Since when do they give out Chihuahuas as seeing eye dogs?”
The man says, “They gave me a Chihuahua?”
– – – – – – – –
Sidecar
Difficulty Rating: 1/5
Taste/s: Orangey and Sharp
Colour/s: Light Orange
Ingredients
25ml Brandy
25ml Cointreau (or any other Orange flavoured liqueur)
Lemon Juice
Equipment
Cocktail Glass
Shaker
Instructions
Pour all the ingredients into the Shaker and shake well with ice. Strain the contents into the glass. Easy-peasy.
Other…
This is simple to make and tastes lovely. Enjoy, my fine, brandy-drinking friends!
– – – – – – – –
A man walks into a bar…
… and sits down next to a lady and a dog. The man asks, “Does your dog bite?”. The lady answers, “Never!” The man reaches out to pet the dog and the dog bites him. The man says, “I thought you said your dog doesn’t bite!” The woman replies, “He doesn’t. This isn’t my dog.”
– – – – – – – –
Stinger
Difficulty Rating: 1/5
Taste/s: Spicy
Colour/s:
Ingredients
2/3 Brandy
1/3 White Crème de Menthe
Equipment
Cocktail Glass
Shaker
Instructions
Pour all the ingredients into the Shaker and shake well with ice. Strain the contents into the glass.
Other…
‘The Stinger’ is also easy to make, which is great when your head starts to spin.
– – – – – – – –
Last Orders…
That’s it for this fortnight. Until next time… adios!
If you have any questions, queries, comments or general feedback, just drop me an email. Also, if you’ve tried a cocktail or drink that you liked (say, for example, when you were out on the razz one night) but can’t remember exactly what’s in it, give me a shout and I’ll try to find out what it’s called and what the correct ingredients are.
Until next time…
Cheers!
Danny Wallace.
Disclaimer: Any drinks you see on here are solely intended for your drinking pleasure. Danny Wallace, InsidePulse and any associated companies are in no way responsible for your actions once these drinks are consumed. That’s your own damn fault.
