It was the Five Year Anniversary week this week on IP and pretty much every single person has been glued (literally in some cases, they’re trying to sticky tape their eyebrows back on after trying to remove their faces from the screen) to their screen to read what column will come next. And obviously every single person has just been pleading the great gods to convince me to give my thoughts on the death of WCW and ECW. Just because you wanted it sooo badly, Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you my thoughts on WCW and ECW!!!!!
Meh.
Thank you, and goodnight! God bless sarcasm. I only got into WCW (not even seriously “into” WCW, just casually into) from Janurary 2001. Yeah that’s how much I miss WCW, there was a grand total of maybe Seventeen Hours (probably less) of WCW that I actually watched. And don’t even get me started on ECW, as I’ve only seen about four of their PPVs (not including One Night Stand). I’d have loved to have been around while WCW was f*cking up around every corner and Bill Alfonso was leaking info, but, well . . I wasn’t. I was off at School doing generally nothing. Ask me in another twelve years once the (insert TNA, WWE, or RoH for some of you) is the big federation and the (TNA, WWE, and / or RoH) are dead, then I’ll tell you my thoughts. What can I say? I look to the future that I’ll hopefully be around to see. And yeah, these entire two paragraphs and one line were just to bulk the column up a bit. It IS Double Taping week anyways. And Double Taping week DOES mean a rather thin column.
“The World Is Watching” and Velocity opens with a video clip that implies all these famous stars to be appearing, though they really don’t. And we’re, as expected, in WWE Studios with Steve Romero and Josh Matthews. This time on Velocity we’re putting an ENTIRE episode (so Matthews implies) towards the Triple Threat Main Event of WrestleMania.
Matthews and Romero talk about Mysterio winning the Rumble, Orton using the ropes at No Way Out, and the majority of the feud has already been covered.
We get a video of Rey Mysterio apologising to everyone. I still hate the fact that the idea was he decided to apologise, and he still looks like a little kid when Long announces it. Maybe a bit more like a Deer in the Headlights, what I imagine them to look like at least. Believe it or not, Theodore Long STILL announces that Rey Mysterio will be in the Main Event, though then again, they couldn’t have edited it to be something like Long announces Orton Vs World Heavy Champion Vs Xandir Whifflebottom. Yeah, THEN you’d watch Velocity wouldn’t you? Just to see Theodore Long reference Xandir.
Commercials.
By the way, the new game I bought this week is God Of War. Twenty bucks at JB Hi-Fi, can you believe that bargain? One hundred at Eb, Bastards.
We get a recap of Legend Vs Legend Killer from last year’s WrestleMania, as Josh Matthews screws up and calls Taker with a 12-0 winning streak, though I remember last year being Thirteen because they could have had one heck of a Unlucky Thirteen Angle. We get about the last seven minutes or so of the match. It would have been the icing on the cake to see Taker get Tombstoned, especially by Randy Orton of all people. Little did we know this time last year that this match would lead to another several matches, with the story lasting from mid-Feburary until December. We all knew it would continue, and we all should have seen it coming.
Commercials.
We now get a clip from Eddie Vs Rey from last year’s WrestleMania. Much like Orton vs UnderTaker, we knew little about the fact that this match would lead to a story that would go from Feburary until August. Though, August isn’t December, so that isn’t as bad.
Commercials.
This time, Shawn Michaels Vs Kurt Angle, another in a long running story series of matches. Noticing a curent trend with last year’s WrestleMania? Trish Vs Lita was already going on for a year roughly at that point, and the feuds that continued afterwards; Triple H / Batista, Kurt Angle / Shawn Michaels, Eddie / Rey, Orton / Taker, JBL / John Cena (albeit only for few months), Hassan / Hogan, with the Money In The Bank guys switching every now and then, though the only real feuds that sprung from it were Shelton / Jericho and Edge / Benoit. What does that say about this year’s already packed WrestleMania card?
Matthews and Romero wonder whether Angle can lock Orton or Mysterio in the AngleLock and win this year?
Meanwhile, up next, we get a two week old replay of Rey Mysterio and Kurt Angle verses Mark Henry and Randy Orton.
Commercials.
You’d hope that they would rather show Fit Finlay verses Rey Mysterio from SmackDown, though I suppose that this Tag Match involves Randy Orton wrestling doesn’t it? Yeah, by the way, we’ve got Henry and Orton verses Mysterio and Angle playing. Seeing Henry and Angle go through the table is still rather nice, however. We only got the last few minutes of this match, from the time were Angle got Orton in the AngleLock. I know, “what time?”, I don’t know. The last time.
Commercials.
We ONLY NOW get footage from this week’s SmackDown, though I don’t know whether that deserves applause or whatever. We get Orton’s nice promo from SmackDown. Pretty much the entire promo too, by the way.
Up next! Kurt Angle verses Mark Henry from SmackDown!
Commercials.
We get Henry vs Angle from the Bearhug, with Angle trying to flip Henry over. Much like what happened on SmackDown we get Mysterio accidentally nailing Angle with a Seated Senton, Angle shoves Mysterio down, before Mysterio nails Angle with a 619. Hm, familiar.
WrestleMania run down finishes us off before Matthews and Romero say how they’re looking forward to Mania, the matches I’m looking forward to most; Cactus Jack verses Edge, Trish Stratus verses Mickie James, Money In The Bank, and Chris Benoit verses John Bradshaw Layfield.
They SHOULD have just had a run down of the entire (yeah, RAW and SmackDown) WrestleMania card, although the inclusion of last year’s WrestleMania matches was a nice touch, and you can’t really expect anything from a Double Taping episode of Velocity (though that excludes the Hall Of Fame DVD Pimp episode). Oh well, until next time, Ciao Y’all.
