The Comic Bloke’s Review Block #5 – 3-31-06
By: Chris Delloiacono
As if readers couldn’t tell by the first four Blocks, I’m pretty down on comics right now. Each week I find less reason to make the weekly excursion to my shop. I’m trying to find new things to read. Trust me, I am.
It’s just not happening.
Welcome to another sad week on the Bloke’s Block.
Blue Beetle #1
“Blue Monday”
Writer: Keith Giffen & John Rogers
Artist: Cully Hamner
Colorist: David Self
Publisher: DC Comics
A more apt title: “Blue Wednesday.”
Most readers know that I’ve hated DC’s direction over the past year. DC had been on a downward trajectory for about two years actually, which led to me dropping most everything they did just as the Countdown titles started. In fact, one of the last main DCU stories I read was Countdown to Infinite Crisis. That happened to be the Ted Kord Blue Beetle’s final appearance. I wasn’t fond of the gritty turn DC took in those pages, the death of BB was a downer, but the comic itself was a decent read.
What I detested was the thought of the dozens of upcoming crossovers. Spending a dollar to be moderately entertained over 80 pages of Countdown to IC wasn’t a bad proposition. I drew the line at dropping $3 again and again to read a story that was bigger than it needed to be.
I haven’t read a single issue of Infinite Crisis, none. I’ve made it a point to keep up with some of the major happenings on the ‘net, but largely I’ve steered clear.
Now that the crossover bug seems to be passing, I decided to give a few of the books launching from IC a chance.
DC’s first chance to win me back”¦
Well, Blue Beetle doesn’t offer anything original or even very entertaining. Giffen & Rogers give their best shot at imitating Quentin Tarantino with an out-of-order storytelling approach. Unfortunately they don’t pull it off.
Three glaring storytelling failures should keep this book from your read pile.
- The book’s inhabited by stock characters that speak in bland dialogue that takes up space from Cully Hamne’s appealing art. These are the type of characters that get written out of a pilot before the real show sees air. DC should come out with a new first issue, and a brand new cast.
- The action is so pathetic. Can you believe we’re expected to be satisfied by a silly hero vs. hero battle between the new Beetle and Guy Gardner? How many times has this cliché been done?
- Finally, there’s a bit of mystery with an eyeless chick, but who really cares. She’s probably the great guardian of the beetle scarab, or something. I just didn’t care.
While Cully Hamne’s artwork is excellent, that new Beetle costume is lackluster dreck. The new Beetle looks like Mantis from the Super Powers toy line. Not an inspiring design at all.
I didn’t buy this book with the purpose of bashing DC. I wanted to be excited to read mainstream DCU again. I’d love to find something DC is doing that I like. I just can’t do it.
And it hurts.
It hurts so much.
Score: F Cow Chip of the Week!!!
The Warlord #2
Writer: Bruce Jones
Artist: Bart Sears
Colorist: Mike Atiyeh
Created by: Mike Grell
Publisher: DC Comics
Here’s another book I want to love, albeit for a slightly different reason than Blue Beetle. The Warlord is just that damn special to me. The previous incarnation is my favorite series of all time. I’m having a difficult timing spacing disappointment over a bastardized rendition of an old favorite with general disappointment over a new comic series. I’m trying to be impartial and I want to find things to like about it. And there are some things.
I actually liked the script better this time out. Bruce Jones has a few cool things going on here. I especially like the way that Travis Morgan, completely new to the world of swords and maces, goes about taking out a vastly superior fighter. It’s a bit silly, but it also seems plausible. Plus I have to give him kudos for the pacing. He’s got this book speeding along.
The biggest problem with this version of The Warlord comes down to artwork. I am not talented in the way of pencil and ink, so I hate to criticize artists. I can’t pick out the little things that bother many comic fans about artwork. Most times I let them go without even a sideways glance.
This book, on the other hand, has glaring artistic weaknesses. Bart Sears, like the first issue, is far too reliant on silhouettes. It seems anytime he doesn’t want to draw detail–bang–silhouette time!
It goes further. The panel-to-panel continuity quite often makes no sense. Sears is also overly dependent on intense close-ups during battle sequences. Again, detail is lacking and it’s a major struggle to figure out what’s going on.
Finally, there’s no sense of wonderment in this strange world. If George Lucas created scenery in Star Wars or Peter Jackson in Lord of the Rings, like this no one would care about their cinematic worlds. Sears renders the North Pole in a more fascinating way than he does Skartaris.
It’s sad to say, but Bruce Jones is fighting a losing battle. This is a time when an artistic change may be the thing to save a book.
Score: C
Ultimate Spider-Man #92
“Deadpool” Part 2
Writer: Brian Michael Bendis
Penciller: Mark Bagley
Inker: John Dell w/ Mark McKenna
Colorists: Laura Martin & Richard Isanove
Publisher: Marvel Comics
Artwork makes a story. Mark Bagley’s rendition of the island of Krakoa is infinitely more interesting than Bart Sears’s illustration of Skartaris. Krakoa is just an island on Earth that happens to harbor Genosha’s imprisoned mutants. It’s a cool place, but it shouldn’t be more wondrous than Skartaris. Yet it is.
Thanks to Mark Bagley for taking a fun, but frilly, script by Brian Bendis and making it an above average comic experience.
Bendis’s dialogue is great as usual, but the real star is Bagley. Big surprise.
I think USM has finally turned the corner of mediocrity it’s been stuck in for a couple of years. Hopefully this is a sign of big things with the upcoming 100th issue.
Score: B
Savage Dragon #124
“Dread Knight Returns “
Writer: Erik Larsen
Artist: Erik Larsen
Colorist: Erik Larsen
Publisher: Image Comics
I don’t ever recall digging this book less than I do right now. 2005 yielded only a few issues, which summarily killed the momentum. We’re still stuck dealing with issues surrounding the previous presidential election. Yes, folks, the one that happened way back in November 2004.
I can’t believe the title is this late!
I respect Mr. Larsen’s responsibilities as Publisher of Image Comics, and what they did to the schedule of Savage Dragon. I even agree with many of Mr. Larsen’s political sentiments, I really do. The fact is, I don’t want to read about them in this comic.
I just hope the rough patch is over. We need to get beyond this storyline. The next issue box claims, “Things Get Worse,” but I’m expecting that Larsen will right the flagging ship in the near future. He just has too.
I’m amazed that after #124 issues I’m actually thinking of cutting ties and moving on. Larsen has earned a reprieve, but my patience is starting to wear thin.
Score: D
Catchin’ Up:
Atomika #6
“God is Red” Part 6
Writer: Andrew Dabb
Artist: Sal Abbinanti
Colorists: Beth Sotelo and Christina Strain
Publisher: Mercury Comics
Superhero stories rarely ascend to the level of true literature. Atomika is one of those rare comics that exudes a high brow feel but is still great fun. There’s grand spectacle, heady concepts, and a bit of horror mixed in.
Dabb and Abbinanti continue Atomika’s journey through the pantheon of Russian gods. This time out, the titular hero takes out Baba Yaga. Along the way a son is born. This is one comic that never takes the safe route. The twists continue to be plentiful and I rarely ever see them coming.
That’s great storytelling.
The interior continue to be freaky and Abbinanti’s artwork brings an H.R. Giger feeling of uneasiness to the proceedings. You almost feel like you shouldn’t be watching this war of the gods, but you can’t turn your head away. The work is at times unsettling, but always thought provoking.
Score: B
Kick to the Bollocks:
Here’s a kick to the Punishe’s bollocks.
Dear, Mr. Castle-
You ass!
As if your copious appearances and incessant clogging of comic store shelves, along with co-conspirators Lobo, Wolverine, Ghost Rider, Spawn, Spider-Man, and Batman, weren’t a big enough reason for the comic industry’s fall from grace in the ‘90s.
Apparently you have plans for an encore in the ‘00s!
The fact that you’re launching a second ongoing series, Punisher: War Journal, is another of the abundant signs of the second apocalypse in the comic industry.
For the past thirty years you’ve been the guy that kills people. Nothing ever seems to change with your character. Characterization has completely eluded you. Simply, you are bereft of any interesting storytelling possibilities.
Please do comic readers a favor and die for good.
Hate ya,
The Bloke
Contact me at acegecko@comcast.net if you have a book you’d like me to review. Hell, just drop me a line and make suggestions of good books and I’ll find ‘em on my own. I’m always looking for the next great thing.
Bloke’s done. See ya next Friday!
