TNA At Ringside: Wargames

Columns

Welcome back to ringside folks. Before we start, I’ll send a shout out to Neeley who’s in Chicago getting me a John Cena autograph.

News & Shit

Saturday Impact Rating: 0.9

Another 0.9 for TNA this week. I thought they might be able to break 1.0 considering Steiner and Sting would be on the show and there was a cage match. Sadly, the cage match sucked and Christian was nowhere to be found. Expect this rating to slip this week because SpikeTV decided it would be a good idea to put TNA up against Bret Hart and Eddie Guerrero. Which will I watch? Well kids, that’s the beauty of having a two TVs in your room. Don’t worry, I’ll be back on Impact coverage this week for all those that decide to skip the show in favor of WWE.

Roderick Strong set to return

Here’s what I don’t understand: Roderick Strong openly comes out and says, “While I’m suspended, I’ll open negotiations with WWE.” Austin Aries on the other hand takes his suspension in stride and keeps his mouth shout. And they decide to bring Strong back? Is TNA that worried that Strong will go to WWE? You know what I say, f*ck him. If Strong wants to go to WWE, use one variation of the backbreaker, job on the internet, and collect a paycheck, then I hope he has fun with Matt Hardy and Shannon Moore. I like Strong and he has a lot of potential but he should get another month added to his suspension for even mentioning negotiations with WWE. Aries on the other hand should be let off on account of good behavior. Oh well, not my call I guess.

Spike Dudley close to signing with TNA

Eh, whatever. I figure they can bring in Spike to help out his “brothers” finally win the Tag Titles from AMW. I don’t see how that would work though because Gail Kim could probably kick his ass.

More Cage Fun

So the build for Lockdown is on and honestly, nothing was accomplished this past Saturday. Oh boy, we found out Samoa Joe was going to face Sabu, like we didn’t see that coming. As I’ve stated before though, I’m really looking forward to this match. Joe is of course one of my favorite wrestlers at the moment and it’s always fun to watch a Sabu match because he’s either going to take a beating or blow a spot. This match is going to be fun just to see how much pain Joe can dish out and how much pain Sabu can take.

On Impact, Sting announced a War Games match at Lockdown. It will be Jarrett’s army against Sting’s army and according to Sting, Jarrett isn’t the only one with speed dial. Good observation Stinger, considering most people with a 21st century phone have speed dial. Of course my speed dial consists of Pizza Hut, EB Games, Blockbuster, and Suncoast; Sting’s speed dial probably consist of Lex Luger, Warrior Warrior, Bill Goldberg, and Random WCW Guy #52. Now I’ve stated how I feel about all of these men at one point or another but in case you’re a first time reader, here’s a recap.

*Lex Luger: He sucks on the mic, he sucks in the ring, and he has no name value. Sadly he’s one of Stings best friends and if he blows Jarrett enough times, he’ll get the job as Stings mystery partner. Thankfully, the TNA crowd will shit on him and probably make him cry. Oh, you people want a bad taste chant? Well, “You Killed Elizabeth” will surely force Luger to quit the company.

*Warrior Warrior: He babbles on the mic, he sucks in the ring, he gave Hogan a blow job (want proof? Here you go: ), and he has negative name value at this point. The TNA crowd will shit on him as well when he starts to babble about nothing. He has no place in TNA or wrestling, period.

*Goldberg: He is bad on the mic, he is decent in the ring, and he has the most name value of the 3. Now I thought the TNA crowd would shit all over Goldberg as well but at Destination X, they wanted Goldberg, which of course shows that the TNA crowd doesn’t know what they want. If I had to pick between these 3, I would want Goldberg. He’s the only one with any name value and any decent wrestling ability.

I personally want TNA to go with my idea of Jarrett, Steiner, & AMW vs. Sting, Killings, and 3-D. That way there’s no huge let down from any of the fans. If you tell me that a surprise guest is going to show up, I expect the best you can get, and those 3 aren’t the best. If TNA really wants to surprise the fans, bring in Jericho. Bring in a guy with name value, a guy that can cut a great promo, and one of the best in the ring. Bring in Chris Jericho and THEN I’ll be surprised.

In other Wargames News, Sting said that there will be a roof on the cage and weapons will be hanging from said roof. It will also be Wargames style which means one man enters at an interval and the match can’t end until all 8 men (4 from each team) are in the ring. Here’s my problem with that, 8 men in that 6 sided ring with a cage become a cluster f*ck. You throw in weapons and it really becomes a cluster f*ck. The only way to solve this problem is have eliminations occur at any time. Forget needing all 8 men in the ring to end the match, elimination can occur at any point in the match and that way the match has a bit more flow. Also that sets up Jarrett & Steiner beating down Sting until the mystery man makes the big save. You see how that works? How the f*ck am I not on the TNA booking team? Riddle me that.

Also at Lockdown, I learned that Christopher Daniels was going to take on Jushin Liger. That’s right, I read a spoiler. Hell, if you search around The Pulse, you’ll see that I posted the Impact Spoilers this week. Yes, Dan Hevia talked me into doing it so like a good trooper, I did. But I did it with quickness and blindness. I copied quick, posted blind, minimized the screen to where I could only see the Title and Teaser, and clicked submit. The only thing I know about Impact this week and next, is that Team Canada shows up sometime or another. Skills people, skills.

As I was saying, Daniels will take on Liger at Lockdown. Last time we saw Liger in a TNA ring he was in a horrible match with Samoa Joe (who would have thought a Joe vs. Liger match would have been horrible) but of course, we can blame that match on Kevin Nash. I expect Liger to come into this match with a little something to prove. Yes he’s already a legend and yes he’s already one of the best cruiserweights in the history of wrestling, but two straight bad matches in TNA is not how you want to be remembers. Especially when your opponents were Samoa Joe and Christopher Daniels, two of the best in the world today. The cage should add a good high spot or two in the match which will make the match that much more enjoyable. This match along with Christian/Abyss and Joe/Sabu makes Lockdown look pretty good on paper. But of course that’s why you hold the events.

The rest of the card is pretty up in the air right now. I will say this though; Christian Cage needs to be on Impact. These stupid promos where he promotes some movie that he has 2 lines in isn’t cutting it. Oh boy, Jim Mitchell follows his wife, spare me. If I die without seeing another stalker angle, I’ll be happy. Did TNA not see the result of the whole DDP/Taker stalker angle? Sara Taker ended up beating DDP in a match. Get Christian on Impact, have him cut a promo, Mitchell can interrupt, Christian and Abyss can brawl, and you’ve got a winning feud that easily. Seriously, why am I not on the booking team?

Neeley vs. I

So as you may have noticed, I did not recap Impact this week and truthfully, I enjoyed the show. I may have enjoyed the show because I was around a bunch of marks who cheered anything that happened. Honestly, Team 3-D hit the 3-D and these guys went crazy like The Colorado Avalanche just won the Stanley Cup. I’ve seen the 3-D 1,000 times, it’s old to me. But they enjoyed the show and because of their enjoyment, I enjoyed the show. Here’s a conversation on AIM with the one and only, Mark Neeley held directly after Impact this past week:

AMPLine4Life: you watch impact?
SuperMx123: yes
SuperMx123: One of the worst Impacts ever
AMPLine4Life: ok
SuperMx123: No, really, it was
SuperMx123: 2 matches
SuperMx123: Both of them horrible
AMPLine4Life: ok
AMPLine4Life: ive come realize that watching it, without having to review it or give opinions about it makes the show a lot better
AMPLine4Life: i didnt feel the need to nit pick about anything or bitch about something
SuperMx123: Even if I wasn’t reviewing, I would probably still feel disgusted watching that episode
AMPLine4Life: it wasnt great but it probably seemed a lot better without an opinion
SuperMx123: you watched it right?
AMPLine4Life: yes
SuperMx123: how the hell could you think it was any good at all with 2 matches, one being a main event which is a squash?
AMPLine4Life: because when you watch wrestling without a scorecard, it’s much better
AMPLine4Life: i thought the arm wrestling shit is dumb and i noticed Young loading up before he went into the cage but other than that, i didnt really mind the show
SuperMx123: without a scorecard? umm….
AMPLine4Life: ….
SuperMx123: i’m not exactly analysing a show when i watch it and there are 2 whole matches, one being a squash
SuperMx123: and not enjoying it
SuperMx123: but maybe i’m keeping a scorecard and analyzing it a little too much
AMPLine4Life: you are. you have to give a review and tell the readers that “this match sucked because it was a squash” and then you put a rating beside it
SuperMx123: go tell Keller, Meltzer and Keith that when they have reviewed squash matches
SuperMx123: not me
SuperMx123: My report is a rant
SuperMx123: Not a review
SuperMx123: It’s opinionated
AMPLine4Life: exactly
AMPLine4Life: if you watch the show without knowing you have to give an opinion. it seems more enjoyable
SuperMx123: Sometimes it does, but you’re missing the point
SuperMx123: In other words, I couldn’t have watched this show, with 2 shitty matches, one being a squash, and enjoyed it
SuperMx123: This one
AMPLine4Life: no, i see your point. your point is that the show had two matches. one was a squash and two was a glorified squash
SuperMx123: And I could not have enjoyed that just because I wasn’t ranting on it
AMPLine4Life: sure you could. casual fans enjoy that shit, thats why they continue to watch every week. we on the other hand watch it because we have to give an opinion on it. sometimes we are lucky enough that they put on a good show and we can say how good it was
SuperMx123: I enjoy wrestling, which is why I can watch RAW every week and enjoy it, despite how usually shitty the wrestling usually is. However, with Impact, I rarely can watch it casually and enjoy it. And I say that honestly
SuperMx123: And it’s not because one is WWE and one is TNA
SuperMx123: it’s the quality of the show
AMPLine4Life: because you dont watch impact casually. you give an opnion on it almost every week. tonight i watched impact with a bunch of people who know shit about wrestling and it was actually fun to here them cheer at the same stuff we see every week. i went into that mind state tonight
SuperMx123: Nope, you’re wrong
SuperMx123: It’s not because I “don’t watch Impact casually.” I have watched Impact casually plenty of times, I usually tape it and watch it casually before I review it. And when I don’t enjoy it, it’s not because I’m being critical of it
SuperMx123: Which is my whole point, I can sometimes get in that environment you were in with your friends on RAW
SuperMx123: And for WWE PPVs, which me and all of my friends watch at Sports Bars
SuperMx123: But with Impact, I can rarely watch one casually and actually enjoy it, even from a “have fun watching it” stand point
AMPLine4Life: you watch it casually when? oh, before you review it. which means you know you have to review it. when you watch raw you know you dont have to review it or give an opinion on it so you can enjoy it more. im not saying that when you watch impact and dont review it you personally will enjoy it more, but tonight i did
SuperMx123: No, again, I don’t watch Impact casually before I review it thinking “I’m going to have to review this.” And, I don’t enjoy it as a fun wrestling show
SuperMx123: I don’t enjoy watching squashes, the countless run-ins, Scott Steiner
SuperMx123: Granted, say a TNA PPV, and I could
SuperMx123: But not Impact
AMPLine4Life: you may not think it in the front of your mind but in somewhere in your head it lingers on you.
AMPLine4Life: shows are skewed when you know you have to give an opinion, no matter what company it may be.

Neeley signed off with no explanation after that. We talked later in the night but I never brought up this convo with him. I watched Impact on torrents just the other day, knowing I needed to see it again before I typed up this column and quite frankly, the show sucked. Both tag matches were pretty lame and the Shelley footage wasn’t as good as previous footage from him.

My whole point is that if you watch a wrestling show without having prior knowledge of anything in the business aside from what you see on TV, the show is much more enjoyable. The people I watched the show with had no clue who was going to win or what was going to happen. Hell, I could have told them that Team 3-D was going to win and they wouldn’t have believed me. So for that one hour, I went into their mind state and enjoyed the show with them. That’s the difference between us as writers and them as fans. We watch the show because it’s part of our job to give an opinion on it. They watch the show because it’s enjoyable to them. Do we sometimes enjoy the show? Yes, but if we didn’t have to give an opinion on the show on a weekly basis, a lot of us wouldn’t watch it. I’ll admit to you right now, I don’t watch Smackdown and Raw is lucky if I change to their channel during commercial breaks for 24. I get my info on the shows by reading the recaps here on IP. The product just doesn’t interest me at the moment so I don’t watch.

In conclusion, Neeley is entitled to his own opinion and I have mine. Nobody is right in this situation and nobody is wrong, take sides if you want, it doesn’t really matter to me.

Wrestlemania

I know, I’m mainly a TNA columnist but it would be wrong of me not to mention Wrestlemania seeing as how it is this weekend. Wrestlemania 12 was the first wrestling PPV I bought and I haven’t missed one since. I’ll admit that I was thinking about skipping this one but I’m going to a friends house to watch it which means I don’t have to pay full price, always a good thing. So I decided to compile a list of my Top 5 WM matches. The list is based on how good the match was and how it affected me as a fan.

5. Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart – Wrestlemania 10: Considered by most the best opener in wrestling history and you’ll get no arguments from me. These two told a story of one brother who has been there done that and the other brother who was trying to escape his brother’s shadow. These two almost stole the show 30 minutes into it but were outdone by The Kliq.

4. Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart – Wrestlemania 13: Many think that this match “made” Steve Austin (I happen to think their Survivor Series match was his making point, but that’s neither here nor there). What this match did was turn Bret into a cocky heel while turning Austin into a never give up face. If there’s one lasting picture of Austin in your head, it’s him in the Sharpshooter with blood covering his face and dripping from his chin and mouth.

3. Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon – Wrestlemania 10: As I said, Hart/Hart would have stole the show if it weren’t for this match. These two defined what a ladder match should be. Any ladder match you have seen in your career, you can thank both of these men. The MITB Match this Sunday, thank you Shawn and Scott.

2. Steve Austin vs. The Rock – Wrestlemania 17: This was the best match in the Austin/Rock series. As a Austin/Rock mark at the time, I enjoyed every match at the end. Even the ending where Austin “turned” was awesome. Everything about this match seemed to click.

1. Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart – Wrestlemania 12: As I mentioned, WM 12 was my first ever wrestling PPV and this just happened to be the main event. Watching these two battle for 60+ minutes was awesome as a young kid knowing little about the sport. No matter how many great matches come along, this one will always be number one in my book.

So there are my top 5 Wrestlemania matches of all time. Based on this year’s card, I don’t see anything that will bump these 5 off or down the list.

YouTube Match Of The Week

I’ll give you another matches from the Michaels/Hart series and no, it’s not the Montreal Screw Job:

Match: Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart
Event: Survivor Series 92
Rating: ****

Plugs

Hevia tells us what Wrestlemania is and isn’t.

Blatt returns to give his input on Wrestlemania.

Eric talks Wrestlemania as well but to a lesser extent.

Phil shows that it’s ok to talk TNA in the time of Wrestlemania. Of course, Phil & J.D. still give you a Wrestlemania list.

Vinny looks at the Austin vs. Hart feud, a feud that ended at Wrestlemania.

David makes us wonder why we still watch wrestling, even if Wrestlemania is this Sunday.

And once again, a special plug:

Flimcans & Others create a list of the top 15 tag teams of all time. I heard Neeley was rumored to do this plug, but I stole it from him because like CM Punk, I’m better than him.

The End

That’s all for this week. Catch me with the Impact Coverage on Saturday. Also as a treat, I’ll be back on Live SD Coverage for the first time since the Summer. Why? I have no freakin clue. I once again give a shout out to Neeley and PK, I hope you guys enjoy your time at Wrestlemania. Drop me a line at AMPLine4Life@aol.com and join me next time At Ringside.