[JunkNewsflash!] Umaga Most Discussed Item At Water Coolers

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Umaga, the wrestler formerly known as Jamal who premiered on Raw last night to attack Ric Flair, was the most talked about item at water coolers across the country Tuesday morning according to the WCI report.

“This is a major upset, as the finals of NCAA Tournament were held last night and the day’s after water cooler chat is usually dominated by who won the office pool,” said Janice Richardson, Communications Director for the WCI. “However, this Umaga was so dominant in his beat down of one of the greatest wrestlers of all time that he struck a cord in the hearts and minds of every day office workers. What was his manager’s name again? That guy wasn’t funny.”

Jonathan “Coach” Coachman, the Raw announcer who predicted this would happen, said he immediately knew that Umaga would be discussed by the water cooler because of Umaga’s primal rage. “Look at Umaga! He has that weird face tattoo, he wears a skirt, he hits people with his butt and he doesn’t feel any pain when he gets hit in the head,” said Coach. “This man is more of a monster than a man, a monster with an unfunny manager. Why’d they pair up a Samoan and a Cuban anyway? What was his name again? Estrada something?”

Inside Pulse will keep you up to date as more information becomes available.

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