Saluti.
As always, if you have any questions about the show (background, history, etc.), or wish to share your opinions of a specific episode/character/plotline/etc, or if you vehemently disagree with one of my conclusions or opinions — please email me by clicking my name in the column title at the top of page. I’ll answer everything here in the column the next week.
First things first: if you aren’t familiar with The Sopranos, or if you need a refresher course on the history of the show (since it has been 21 months since the last episode), please read my column on the background of Tony Soprano. It concentrated on Tony’s character, but touches just about every large storyline that we’ve seen over the first 5 seasons. You should be able to find links to the recaps to the past few episodes at the bottom of the page.
I apologize now for the lateness of the last two recaps. My personal life has gotten a bit chaotic, due to the fact that I’m having a house built in Middletown, DE. Dealing with the bank, the county, the builder, etc. has been a non-stop headache for the last 3 weeks or so. Luckily, I pretty much got everything sorted out in these past few days (which only required about 36 phone calls in the last 15 hours), so I should be able to get back on track now.
(Of course, I could obviously be much quicker on these if they were shortened. So, let me ask the audience: are you willing to wait a couple of days (realizing that I’m now talking Tuesday afternoon, not Thursday) for this level of detail and analysis, or would you rather get a shorter recap on Monday morning? Email me.)
Well, that was probably more than you wanted to know about my non-InsidePulse life. So, let’s get down to business:
Previously on The Sopranos:
- Johnny Sack is released from prison to attend his daughter’s wedding
- Melfi and Tony talk about his shooting
- Johnny, by way of Phil Leotardo, asks Tony to whack Rusty, but Tony declines
- Junior is found to have symptoms of dementia, and is put in a psychiatric facility
- Johnny asks Tony personally to take care of Rusty, and Tony agrees
- Tony tells Christopher to use someone outside their family to handle the hit
- Johnny is dragged away from the end of the wedding in handcuffs, and breaks down in tears
- Phil talks about how his opinion of Johnny has “plummeted”
- Vito Spatafore is discovered in a gay bar, with another man, by a fellow wiseguy named Sal who was making a collection
- Tony is worried that his crew is looking at him differently since his hospital stay, so he picks a fight with the newest member of his crew – a young, well-built young man named Perry, who had been acting as Tony’s driver and bodyguard
Episode 71: Live Free or Die:
Directed by: Tim Van Patten
Written by: David Chase & Terence Winter & Mitchell Burgess & Robin Green
We discover the current whereabouts of Vito, who’s staying with his goomara, somewhere near the ocean (Jersey shore, it turns out). Life isn’t very happy for him there, though – as we find out he hasn’t had sex with her for the past year. (He blames his blood sugar, due to the recent weight loss.)
Chris and Tony talk about the Rusty hit out front of Satriale’s, with Tony laying out the details: two guys are on their way over from Italy, and Christopher is to handle everything through “a third party”. Chris tells Tony that he realizes how smart this plan is, although Tony still is somewhat flippant about Chris’s opinion. Tony also has a quick talk with Perry to clear everything up about their fight, with Tony giving Perry a small pile of cash (standard behavior for any of these guys after behaving somewhat badly). Perry apologizes for, basically, fighting back – but Tony tells him it’s no big deal: “As long as you realize, eh?”
Christopher is attending an AA meeting, and runs into a fellow wiseguy from Yonkers — who, in an amazing coincidence, just happens to be related to Sal, the guy who saw Vito in the gay bar last week. Chris immediately goes to the Bada Bing, and informs Tony and boys of what he just heard. One of Tony’s Captains, Carlo, knows who Sal is, and vouches for his word. In general, the crew doesn’t believe the story (“He’s married!” “With a goomah!”), but Chris claims he knew beforehand (but didn’t say anything – yeah, right). Silvio tells everyone how Sal called him in the middle of the night a couple of days before. An attempt to call Vito goes straight to voice mail, which does nothing to calm anyone down. Tony attempts to cool things off, but his choice of words are, shall we say, less than ideal: “And enough of this rush to judgment, alright? For all we know, this guy Sal’s got a hard-on for Vito.” There’s even a point where they wonder if the sudden weight loss was due to AIDS (okay, didn’t see that coming – good to see the writers are still having fun with the actor’s stomach stapling).
Meadow meets with a Muslim family at the legal center where she’s interning. They tell her that their son has been held for four days by the FBI with no charges. Her attempts to talk about it with her family don’t go over well, as expected: Carmela thinks “there must have been a reason”, AJ figures he might have been a terrorist, and Tony just tells her to “chill out.”
Back at Satriale’s, Tony asks Christopher about the two Arabs he was dealing with in the past episode (selling stolen credit cards):
T: “You think there’s a chance they could be, uhh… I don’t know, Al-Qaidas? Something like that?”
C: “Hmm. Y’know, at one point, it did cross my mind.”
T: “Yeah, and?”
C: “I don’t think so. They’re gun nuts, but the smaller guy, Ahmed? When those Danish cartoons got published, he got very upset – but at the protesters. He said he hated the cartoons, but that the rioting shit would just bring bad attention to all Muslims. And the other guy, Mohammed, his brother’s a government interrogator in, uhh… Lebanon. Or Syria. Plus, Mohammed and his girlfriend have a dog – a Springer Spaniel.”
Vito pulls up in the driveway of his goomara’s place, only to find Benny and Terry Doria waiting for him. They tell him Tony wants to see him, and he agrees to follow them. Of course, as soon as he gets in his car, he tears out of there like a bat out of hell.
Christopher meets up with his “third party”, Corky Caporale – who gets hired because he speaks Italian, and gets paid in heroin. Corky already has heard the rumors about Vito, which Chris denies — at first, but eventually confirms that Vito ran when confronted about it. Corky: “It could be a mid-life thing.” Chris: “Sucking a cock?” (Oh, believe me – I’d *love* to put those lines up as the teaser.)
Vito goes back home, talks to his (very young, attractive, and sluttily-dressed) babysitter (well, at least his wife never had to worry about *her* being a problem), collects cash he has hidden all around the house, packs a bag, kisses his sleeping children, and takes off in his car to… well, somewhere away from there. (This part bugged me – why isn’t somebody from Tony’s crew watching the house? Shouldn’t they be expecting this, as obvious as it is?) While driving (and eating ribs), he gets a call on his cell from “Phil L”. Well, yeah – you would expect that Phil would be a mite bit pissed. To deal with the situation, Vito simply tosses the cell out the window. Unfortunately for him, he runs over a fallen tree branch a while later, and does some pretty serious damage to his car: bad enough that he has to pull out his luggage and walk the rest of the way (in the rain, naturally) to… whoa, Dartford, New Hampshire? (Fictional town, btw.) There, he finds a room in some little Bed & Breakfast-type Inn (for $140/night), and immediately lies down on the bed.
The next morning, Carmela is at the site of the house she and her father are (allegedly) building, which appears to be much more barren than expected. Carmela drives to her father’s and confronts him about it, and he seems less than concerned. They have an argument about the permits for the house, with each blaming the other, until Carmela storms off.
Vito walks into a diner, orders a coffee, and tries to find a phone listing for his cousin through 411. Unfortunately, there doesn’t appear to be anything listed anywhere in the state. Back at the diner, the cook suggests the “Johnny cakes”, which are pancakes made with white corn meal. (Amazing how many conversations in this show revolve around food, even when you least expect it.) An obviously gay couple walk in, make some small talk with fellow diners, and are greeted warmly by the cook – all of which Vito pays very close attention to.
Silvio pays a visit to Marie Spatafore, asking how things have been between her and Vito, “in the romance department.” She’s hesitant to talk about it, and doesn’t give Sil much useful info. He walks back to his car, where Tony is waiting: “My business, I’m around a lot of women. That one? Ain’t gettin’ laid.”
A construction worker finds Vito phone as it’s ringing and answers it, only to find Tony on the other end. After a brief discussion that mostly consists of variations on the phrase “f*ck you”, the worker decides to throw the phone under a steamroller – after telling Tony he found the phone on the side of the road, but failing to say where.
Carmela, Rosalie Aprile, and Gabrielle Dante are gathered in Vesuvio’s, talking about an upcoming silent auction, when Angie Bompensiero storms in and basically takes over. Gabrielle tells everyone about Vito and Marie’s “separation”, which comes as a surprise. Angie ends up yelling at an employee over her cellphone at the table, which obviously irritates Carmela to no end.
Dr. Melfi and Tony discuss the situation with Vito (“You didn’t know he was gay?” “Actually, I had him pegged the whole time..” What is it with these guys?). Tony is obviously conflicted, mostly because Vito was his top earner. But he admits that he finds homosexuality “disgusting”, although “the lesbian thing – Jennifer Beals – that’s not bad.” He also throws out: “Don’t forget – I’m a strict Catholic.” (Yeah, except for the whole murder, violence, extortion, lying, stealing and infidelity stuff.) Of course, it always comes back to money – Vito and Tony were partners on construction jobs, and Tony is concerned he’ll lose that business since old-school union guys won’t want to deal with him (having worked for a boilermaker union in the Philadelphia area a few years back, I can confirm that’s about a 100% possibility). Tony: “The guys that work for me are asking for head. His head. What da f*ck….” Melfi brings up the fact that many of the mob guys have done jail time, so “they can’t be strangers to male-male sexual contact.” Tony: “You get a pass for that.” Melfi: “Well, that’s nice.” Tony finally admits that there’s a part of him that really would like to see Vito just get a second chance, which Melfi attributes to Tony’s “new outlook.”
Back at home, Carmela is in bed dealing with paperwork for the silent auction. Tony: “My busy little beaver.” Carm: “Not really.” (Man, the fact that Angie is supporting herself is driving Carm batty.) Carmela reminds Tony about taking care of the permit issues on the house, which Tony promises to handle soon. While lying in bed, Tony admits that Carmela was right all along about Junior, and that Carmela has never said “I told you so.” (If nothing else, getting shot has made Tony a better husband by a factor of 10, at least.)
The next morning, Carmela and Rosalie are discussing the new revelation about Vito, which they both discovered very recently. Meadow walks in, asks about Vito, and intimates that she knows something about him. Carmela finally admits: “He is, possibly, gay.” Meadow: “Finn saw him giving some guy a blowjob.” Ooookay, *now* the shit will officially hit the fan. I love when these storylines pay off. Tony walks in, singing and in a happy mood – well, that’s gonna change.
Yup, it does – here comes Tony and Finn into Satriale’s, with most of the crew there. Tony sits Finn down, and has him spill the beans on what he knows. We don’t actually hear the story, because it’s time to switch to…
Vito in New Hampshire, taking in the sights of small town living: antique shops, people in the park who say “Good morning”, waterfalls, etc.
And back to Satriale’s, where the story has obviously just finished. Sil asks for a bit of a clarification, and Finn confirms that it was Vito going down on the security guard, not the other way around — something which apparently matters quite a bit to these guys. Finn is worried about Vito finding out, but Paulie is emphatic that he won’t have to worry about that. Tony sends Finn out front to get a sandwich for himself, and the rest of the guys let loose with the outrage. Christopher wants cut off his “piseddu” and feed it to him, Paulie feels betrayed, and Carlo insists that “he has to go!” However, Tony wants to think about it. Paulie confronts him: “What the f*ck is there to think about?” Tony (in his face, yelling): “You gonna take care of his kids, huh? After he’s gone?” Chris: “That’s true, they didn’t do nothin’. Poor little guys.”
Phil shows up to console Marie in his own way, telling her that if he finds him, “I’ll tear him limb from limb”. Phil also tells her that the rumors have been confirmed (geez, that didn’t take long – so much for Tony’s proclamation of “This stays within these four walls”). He also tries to find out where Vito might have gone, of course.
Carmela shows up at Angie’s body shop to pick up an item for the silent auction, and walks in on a financial exchange of some sort between Angie, and Benny and Patsy. Well, now – looks like she’s taken over just about all of Pussy’s old job. Carmela and Rosalie talk about the situation a little later, with Rose confirming that “Angie’s putting money on the street.”
Carlo gets called into Tony’s office and informed that he’ll be taking over all of the construction business, which Carlo is ecstatic about. Carlo also lets Tony know that the guys in Vito’s crew are saying they won’t work for him, if he returns. Tony insists that it isn’t their decision, and talks about how Vito turned himself into a top earner: “He’s a come-from-behind kinda guy.” (Okay, that’s three slips now.) Tony: “Oh, please, huh? Y’know, certain people, they love the high drama – like f*ckin’ high school girls. And others I can name, they just can’t wait to whack somebody – anybody.” (Hmm, think that’s a comment about the audience’s impatience when not enough people get whacked? David Chase is listed as writer on this episode – I wouldn’t be surprised if that came from him.) Silvio cautions Tony against showing any slack to Vito, since the other members of the crew (like Paulie) would see that as an excuse to “go off the reservation”.
Meadow meets the lead attorney on a case she’s now helping out with, which is some sort of “white collar fraud”. Once she’s out of earshot, the attorney tells a co-worker: “Tony Soprano’s kid.” (Gee, think that could be a stigma that stays with her while pursuing a law career?) Later that evening, Meadow and Finn have an argument, comparing the white collar criminal in that case (who’s out on bail) with the treatment of Johnny Sack at his daughter’s wedding. Yes, Meadow argues for Johnny’s side – I know, I’m as shocked as you. It probably doesn’t help that they’re smoking pot while having the argument – again, a bit of personal experience on my side here. Finn also spills about how stressful it was to “rat out Vito” in front of the whole crew, and that he’s sure he knows what they’re going to do about it.
And speaking of our favorite recently slimmed down homosexual, he walks into an antique shop (no, I’m not setting up a joke here – he really does walk into an antique shop). He picks up a vase, and admires it a bit. “This is nice. This pot.” (Ha – nice reference to the last scene.) It turns out to be the most expensive item in the store, so apparently Vito is a “natural” at this.
Cue credits.
What did we learn this week?
– Rumors about sexual preference spread through the New Jersey and New York mafias faster than your typical junior high school class.
– Apparently, terrorists do not own spaniels.
– Off-season rates for B&Bs in fictional New Hampshire towns are outrageous.
– Johnny Cakes are a New England specialty, in the Sopranos universe. (I’ve never heard of them, and a friend of mine in Massachusetts never had either.)
– Carmela’s jealousy of Angie’s financial self-support is going to cause an issue – sooner rather than later, I think.
– There’s a huge difference, in a wiseguy’s mind, between getting a blowjob from a guy, and giving one.
Next week on the Sopranos:
- Christopher travels out to California for some kind of business with Little Carmine
- Artie is having problems with the restaurant
- Benny is apparently handling Chris’ business in Jersey while he’s away
- Tony talks to Phil about Artie
- Tony asks Artie if he needs help. “From you? God, no.”
- Benny gets in a fight with somebody. After going slow-mo on my TiVo a couple of times, it definitely looks like Artie.
