The Pit Report: It’s Always Something With Tito

Columns

I want you to read the following story and pretend to be surprised.

ORTIZ VS. SHAMROCK GRIFFIN VS. SHAMROCK

Well, it didn’t take long, but Tito Ortiz and Zuffa aren’t seeing eye to eye anymore. UFC President Dana White announced on the radio over the weekend that Tito pulled out of the July 8th fight with Shamrock. Ortiz’s replacement will be his UFC 59 opponent Forrest Griffin. White said that Griffin asked for the fight. Dana said, “It’s always something” with Tito.

Yes, it’s always something. If it’s not his big, fat ego, it’s his complete f*cking stupidity. I’ve tried to understand Tito’s motives over the years, but I don’t think Tito himself knows what the hell is going on in his head sometimes. I am very curious, however, to hear Tito’s side of this story.

When asked about the Ortiz vs. Griffin fight at UFC 59, White said that he scored Forrest as the winner, and Zuffa CEO Lorenzo Fertitta scored it a draw with Forrest winning rounds two and three and Tito winning the first round 10-8. White was critical of judge Abe Balardo, saying he should never score another MMA fight again, as he scored the fight 30-27 for Ortiz.

Look, it was a really close fight. I wanted to see Griffin win, but I don’t feel he was robbed by the judges. Like Dana always says during The Ultimate Fighter, you never want to leave a fight in the judges’ hands.

White also made a rather interesting statement that the UFC, “will be on HBO very soon. It will happen.” I just hope they bring in Larry Merchant to get shitfaced with Joe Rogan.

THE HEAVYWEIGHT RUBBER MATCH

July 8th will be another big night for UFC, as Griffin vs. Shamrock co-headlines the main event of Arlovski vs. Sylvia 3. Wait, we had to wait a f*cking year for Liddell vs. Couture 3. What’s this, three months?

White said that Sylvia requested that Andrei get an immediate rematch to put the fluke allegations to rest. That, and you know, there’s no other Heavyweights worth a shit in UFC right now.

Sylvia has won four fights in a row and sports a 21-2 record, while Arlovski who had won six fights in a row before his loss three weeks ago is now 10-4.

NEW BLOOD IN THE MIDDLEWEIGHT DIVISION

Anderson Silva has inked a multi-fight deal with the UFC. Considered to be one of the best Middleweights in the world, Silva will look to get a shot at UFC’s Middleweight champion, Rich Franklin. The Middleweight division is about as lackluster as the Heavyweight division right now, so look for Silva to have earned a title shot by the time Ace is back in action.

Silva’s win list is a who’s who of UFC veterans including Tony Frykland, Curtis Stout, Jeremy Horn, Jorge Rivera, Lee Murray and Carlos Newton.

MUTANT MAILBAG

I’ve been really busy this past week, so I decided to respond to some of my e-mail here in order to make it look like there’s some actual content in this week’s column.

From: Michaelangelo McCullar, Apr 17

Re. Tito/Forrest, honestly, it wasn’t that I was upset at the decision, although I would have scored it 29-28 Forrest. But how the f*ck does one judge give all three rounds to Tito? And the second judge scored the first round 10-8 for Tito, which I found a bit incredulous. But I think if there hadn’t been a 30-27 scorecard, there’d be no issue.

Michaelangelo writes for both the Sound and Screen sections here at IP. If that’s his real name, his parents are awesome. I kind of agree about the scorecard, but a lot of these judges are f*cking ignorant about MMA. I’ll be honest, I pretty much posted this just because of the use of the word “incredulous.”

From: Gabe, Apr 18

Wah wah wah, Tito. You won the damn fight (I agreed with the decision), why are you bitching about it now, just because Forrest stopped your shitty takedowns? Why not just blame your busted knees?

UFN4 and this PPV were both a bit lackluster, at a time when they should be bringing in new fans. They really need some excitement on their next card. Forrest/Bonnar 2 can’t come fast enough.

Bonnar is UFN’s golden boy. I don’t think he’ll ever see a pay-per-view card. It kind of makes sense to use Bonnar on commercial television though, because the dude has personality out the ass.

Gabe normally writes weekly, and I wanted to point that out because he’s in the Navy. He’s gotta be a busy guy, but he loves UFC and takes the time to comment on my stupid shit. I respect the hell out of anyone that is in the military, especially in these f*cked up times (shout-out to my crony Toups). I also respect Gabe because he’s a cool motherf*cker.

From: LeiTong123, Apr 20

Oh, f*ck, not you again.

WAR ANAL RETENTIVENESS!

Believe it or not, readers, this makes more sense than the final e-mail in today’s mailbag.

Anyway, I wasn’t shitting on your predictions (okay, I was a bit), as much as the fact that you didn’t really try to scratch beneath the surface to write up the preview. I mean, you’ve picked Cruz to lose twice by submission to guys who had little chance of submitting him, mainly because he’s an MMA neophyte. What you can’t find from the Fight Finder is the fact that:

1) Pe de Pano is a VERY accomplished submission grappler.
2) The vast majority of heavyweights in MMA really suck, especially when it comes to submissions.

Slow down there, Lei. You’ve obviously read my stuff. I’m not generally a scratch beneath the surface kind of guy. I try to look at things objectively and take a f*cking guess, which is all a prediction is. I had PdP down in two cards as being submitted because I overestimated his opponents. Like a lot of people, I thought Mir would be coming back like a caged animal waiting to be unleashed. Monson had been on a hell of a winning streak, and I did not expect him to try and stand up with a guy as tall as PdP. I am well aware of Marcio’s skills, and believe me, I will not underestimate his abilities again.

Combine the two, and it becomes obvious that Monson/Mir’s submission wins aren’t quite as impressive as they may first seem, and that their lack of striking skills means they’re going to have a hard time with a guy whose bread and butter is the same as theirs.

We finally agree on something.

Now I know you (like most other MMA journalists nowadays) are writing for an audience who is pretty new to the sport, so there’s little need to be in depth, but a little bit of searching can make you infinitely more informed about the one MMA event you write up.

I almost take that last line as an insult. I’ve been watching UFC since the beginning, and I consider myself pretty well informed. The reason why it’s the one MMA event I write about is because I’ve been a fan for so many years. I’ve only followed Pride for a couple years now, and there’s not enough news out of KotC, WEC, or any other smaller promotion, to do a weekly column about. I love UFC, and I make no excuses about that; the same way I make no excuses for still wearing Slayer t-shirts at 33 years old.

You seem like a smart guy, Lei, but calling me a journalist is a bit of a stretch. As always, I appreciate you’re aggravating e-mails.

Warning: You might not want to be drinking a beverage while reading this last one.

From: Cindy Moore, Apr 21

to kendll groves
Aloha, from Maui, this is Cisco, looking for your email
address. Congtratulations!!!!
Our email address: [removed out of pity]
Let us know whats happening.
Aloha,
Cisco

Double-U Tee Eff? I don’t even know where to begin.

Ok, for those who don’t know, Kendall Groves is one of the Middleweights on The Ultimate Fighter 3. He’s from Hawaii, and apparently Cisco is looking for him…by way of my column. I’m almost tempted to reply with, “WAR ANAL RETENTIVENESS!”

Seriously, I’m at a total loss for words.

I’M SUCH A WHORE

I’m going to try not to do this every week, but I need to whore my own stuff again. I need a web designer who is well versed in PHP-based content management systems. I have PHP-Nuke on the server, and it would do just fine, if I could get it customized. If you’re good with this kind of shit, send a link to your work and your asking price to whitetrashdevil at gmail dot com. I need someone to be a full-time lackey for me, but I am willing to pay to get this done, and done right the first time, to get the ball rolling.